Chapter 56
Chapter 56
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 56
Chapter Title: A Face That Sings Well
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Ayase's singing skills are atrocious.
No, that's not even strong enough to describe it.
If I had to sum up Ayase's singing in one phrase...
It'd be something like "a dirge infused with the essence of plucking ant whiskers."
Of course, there's no rule saying VTubers have to be good singers just because they're VTubers.
But "singing" as content is undeniably the national rice soup of VTubers.
It's no exaggeration to say VTubers and singing are inseparable—whether they sing well or not, songs make for prime content material.
VTubers who sing well frequently drop cover songs.
Some even go all-in, professionally producing and releasing original tracks as content.
For those who can't sing, they turn it into punishment streams like karaoke challenges.
Or react to big donations by belting out a tune.
A bad singer VTuber crooning cutely with an embarrassed face is one of the fun points of VTuber streams.
But.
Ayase's singing is truly, purely, nothing more or less than ant-whisker-plucking levels of agony.
Ayase's normal speaking voice is a beautiful clear tone often praised as "heavenly."
But every time she sings, it's like she's sold her soul to the demons of heavy metal and cracked notes, unleashing a eardrum-shredding dirge.
If Ayase only sang once in a blue moon, it might even be a novelty.
Ayase genuinely believes she's good at singing.
...Yeah.
In short, she sings a lot.
She crams in at least ten songs per session, so the fact her vocal cords hold up is impressive in its own way.
Anyway, I can't sing for shit either, just like Ayase.
So the ant-whisker effect should be guaranteed.
The moment I announced I'd take song requests...
💬 Live Chat — Viewer Whoa — Viewer Big one's comingggg — Viewer It's hereeeee — Viewer World's first, universe's first: Reflecting Myriad Stars cult leader song stream ㄷㄷㄷㄷㄷ — Viewer First time for streamer's song stream? — Viewer Yeah, world's first ⭐ Top Comment — Viewer Just from the face, looks like a physiognomy that sings well — Viewer Bang! lol Song requests started flooding in: this one, that one.
What's with this?
Don't you know the meta? The meta?
"Request via donations."
— Viewer Aw man — Viewer What's the rate? "Ten thousand won."
This isn't donation bait.
Taking song requests via donations is the ironclad meta of internet streaming.
And the price wasn't even high, so viewers quickly accepted it.
However.
If requests poured in unchecked, I could end up with dozens backed up.
"I'll take the first ten on a first-come basis. Five seconds: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1..."
The second I said "1"...
⚙ DONATION ALERT ⚙ Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Dozens of mission donations came pouring in.
"Stop, stop! Uh, first ten are already filled!"
...I didn't expect the firepower to be this intense.
Good call limiting to first-come.
Mission donations can be canceled anytime, so no scamming.
Those who missed out just cancel theirs.
But that 10% mission failure commission fee? Tasty.
Ah, those thousand-won punches hit sweet.
...
...
...
The first request was a perfectly normal ballad.
Viewers could judge my skills from this opener.
Their reaction was ice-cold.
💬 Live Chat — Viewer Ah. — Viewer No fun — Viewer Total snooze — Viewer What kinda granrad — Viewer Granrad out — Viewer Gotta do hip-hop, must do hip-hop — Viewer Hip-fail GTFO — Viewer Where's the rock? Where's the rock? Where's the rock? Where's the rock? — Viewer Aw rockfail... — Viewer Rockfail GTFO too — Viewer VTubers' meta is J-Pop right? — Viewer For real lol — Viewer Sing anime OP plsss Some love hip-hop.
Some love rock.
Some love J-Pop.
With a random crowd, tastes vary wildly.
Whatever.
If you're salty, donate faster next time.
I searched the video site for the first ballad request.
[Love Song Karaoke Accompaniment]
Chat exploded.
💬 Live Chat — Viewer What a mood killer ffs lololol — Viewer Karaoke track lololol — Viewer Why does adding karaoke at the end look so jank? — Viewer Other VTubers use MR... — Viewer If ballad, pls MR... — Viewer Ugh, wrong VTuber means karaoke track hell "I'm not a pro singing streamer, why MR? I'm a total amateur, so I'll sing amateur-style."
Like I had time to prep that.
No need to overthink.
Wasn't even that nervous.
I turned on echo and...
Started singing right away.
...
...
...
Ever heard your own singing as an audio file?
You think you nailed it, but playback hits like a horror show.
In other words.
Listening to your singing recorded gives an objective gauge of your skill.
I've never recorded mine.
But I don't need to hear it to know.
My singing is abysmal.
Can't even hit high notes.
First request being ballad meant vocal power was key.
I just powered through the full song thoughtlessly.
Viewers probably got eardrum terrorism.
But...
Chat reaction felt off.
💬 Live Chat — Viewer Whoa... — Viewer Kya~~~~~~ — Viewer Sings mad good? — Viewer Thought title meant bad singer, but not bad lololol — Viewer Physiognomy is science fr — Viewer Music pocket ㄷㄷㄷ — Viewer Singing pocket ㄷㄷㄷㄷ — Viewer Vocal pocket ㄷㄷㄷ — Viewer Volume pocket ㄷㄷㄷㄷ Sensing something wrong, I broke into a cold sweat.
"...Did it sound good?"
— Viewer You call that asking? — Viewer Sounds good, sounds good, sounds good~ — Viewer New ASMR type? 💰 DONATION ⚡ [Current Practical Music Academy Teacher donated 5,000 won] No technique at all, but natural timbre is killer? Total talent. Polish it right and real/sound school admission free pass ez.
— Viewer High praise what lololol — Viewer Max praise — Viewer Explanation GOAT. Thx. — Viewer Singing pocket confirmed lololol ...I'm not an idiot.
I knew VTuber song streams were killer content for pulling randos.
But only if backed by decent skill.
With my trash singing, it'd repel even regulars, I thought.
Ayase loses 1k-2k viewers when she sings.
What I overlooked: one thing.
Body swap.
Body swap means new vocal cords too.
One vocal cord change turns me talent-loaded?
Suddenly.
I looked down at my body.
— Viewer ? — Viewer This guy's slandering himself? — Viewer Why suddenly self-roast... — Viewer ㅗㅜㅑ ㅗㅜㅑ ㅗㅜㅑ ㅗㅜㅑ Was it really a singing pocket?
This throws a massive wrench in my ant-whisker plan.
And sure enough.
After one song, viewers and followers were up from before.
Uh.
Um.
"Song stream ends here..."
— Viewer ? — Viewer ??? — Viewer ???????????????? — Viewer Lee Jia/Controversies & Incidents "...Next request it is."
— Viewer Kya~~~~~~ — Viewer Go Jia! Go Jia! Go Jia! — Viewer Spreading word on forums: Lee Jia doing god-tier song stream ㅇㅇ Ant-whisking.
Seems like a failure.
Reverse cam stream.
Confirmed.
Thud thud thud.
Price for defying fate.
But... giving up feels freeing.
Whatever, stream's cooked anyway—knock out the rest and end.
Night's calling for booze.
Checking the next mission donation, I was speechless.
📋 MISSION DONATION ⚡ 'NotAHiddenWife' 10,000 won mission! Sing a hymn to Reflecting Myriad Stars — Viewer Waiting for this lololol — Viewer Wondered when it'd drop lololol — Viewer You are the hidden wife lololol — Viewer Zealot gotta hymn, must hymn — Viewer Viewers deep in RP too lol — Viewer Hey, not RP. Real deal. — Viewer RP <- Should set as forbidden word, upvote if agree lol — Viewer Upvote. And the follow-ups were more of the same.
📋 MISSION DONATION ⚡ 'ㅇㅇ' 10,000 won mission! Three bears, let's go~ 📋 MISSION DONATION ⚡ 'AverageBeliever' 10,000 won mission! If I'm cute, what ya gonna do? Sing in a super aegyo voice~ 📋 MISSION DONATION ⚡ 'NotIntoOldMen' 10,000 won mission! Golden Subscriber - Straight to Loader Normalization ...
...
...
Requests that no sane person would make.
Way too shortsighted.
Should've predicted this flood of nonsense the moment I opened requests.
Even knowing VTuber culture inside out.
I'm still a total noob streamer.
Bone-deep realization: watching streams ≠ running one.
Was too hasty for ant-whisking.
Ant-whisking flopped hard.
Reverse cam locked in.
Now gotta sing every trash request to end stream.
Loss.
Massive loss, damn it.
...Reflecting Myriad Stars hymn.
Requested, so gotta sing. Fine.
But.
"Need a hymn to sing first. I'd looove to, but sadly skipping this..."
💰 DONATION ⚡ [NotAHiddenWife donated 10,000 won] No worries, Jia. Knew it'd come, already AI-made hymn up on the cafe ㅇㅇ. Karaoke version too. No thx needed. Peace.
"..."
— Viewer Kya, you're the one! — Viewer Believed in you! — Viewer Thx all — Viewer Ant-whisk? No way, dogshit fail! No escape.
Anywhere.