Chapter 9
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Translator: Ace
Chapter: 009
Chapter Title: Heonjong Meets the Barbarian
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After performing the ancestral rites for my parents and the crew, I rose as a symbol of filial piety and was essentially recognized as an honorary Joseon native.
The ripple effect of that rite request was far greater than I'd underestimated, coming from my twenty-first-century mindset.
"The nation's customs have grown corrupt lately, with heterodox teachings rampant. We must properly educate the people. How about including young Aseul's exemplary filial piety in the expanded edition of the Three Bonds and Five Ethics Illustrations?"
Boom! The first Westerner to be immortalized in the Three Bonds and Five Ethics Illustrations!
And it didn't stop there.
"This is the child?"
"To think even a foreigner with such different features and customs could learn and internalize our ways—truly, the Great Learning serves as a guide for all lives."
Famous heavyweight Confucian scholars of the era.
Hwaseo Yi Hang-ro.
Nosa Gi Jeong-jin.
I'd heard the names. Just the names.
Racking my brain a bit more, Yi Hang-ro's disciple must be Choi Ik-hyeon, right? Or was it? Choi Ik-hyeon was that guy who said, "That's the thug over there," wasn't he...
Anyway, diligently reading alternate history novels comes in handy when you get hit by a truck or abducted by a mountain spirit. I should've read more. If not for that stupid jar ghost, I'd have prepared ahead.
—So it was a mistake?! If I hadn't messed up, you wouldn't have come along, and you'd have died in the storm, you fool!
Hmm. Can't deny that. But it's frustrating!
Anyway, in Joseon, Yi Hang-ro and Gi Jeong-jin were respected figures among scholars—opinion leaders in the wilds, if you will (no real power).
Both had been repeatedly invited to serve in office but refused, devoting themselves to studying Neo-Confucianism and teaching disciples in seclusion.
Why? Obvious reason.
The country was a total mess.
The powerful clans had divvied up the offices years ago and were just playing house among themselves. Hell, massive rebellions like Hong Gyeong-nae's uprising had even erupted. Even the current king, Heonjong, had faced a coup attempt.
Getting called to office wouldn't fix the nation anyway, and you had to wonder if the invitations were even sincere.
Yet even these men, who brushed off the overtures from the power brokers to focus on scholarship, couldn't resist when Kim Ja-geun dangled the lure named Arthur Leigh. They ended up trekking to the capital and stepping into the grand estate of the Jangdong Kim house.
Honestly.
How could any self-respecting Confucian hold back?
It played out exactly as Kim Ja-geun had hoped.
Once they'd set foot as guests, they couldn't exactly curse out the host with, "You lot run politics like dogs." In Joseon, where courtesy duels decided everything, that'd send you straight to ruin.
Besides, derailing Yi Ji-yeon's heterodox purge wasn't bad for the Kim clan's interests either. With the court already under Kim control, maintaining the status quo was ideal—no point stirring up trouble for little gain.
And so, by solidifying Kim power, I...
...got to enjoy the height of luxury, with meat dishes at every meal. Mmm. Beef is divine. Who cares if the country's a wreck—it's not mine.
With my belly stuffed full, I plopped down on the porch railing and stared blankly at the sky.
I never used to have the habit of sky-gazing, but now I did. At least the Joseon folks thought I enjoyed it.
The reason for this habit? Obviously—
Chirp chirp!!
—Hah, what a hassle.
Hey, buddy. Cut the whining and spit out the intel already.
Daytime words are heard by birds, nighttime ones by rats.
While I mumbled sky chants at Kim Ja-geun's mansion, the world's top spy agent, Dragon King, was out gathering intelligence from the palace and court in my stead.
Sure, sources were limited and spotty, but catching even scraps from the deep palace was a massive opportunity.
—Nothing special.
Jar ghost. Lately, your reports are all bland.
Tsking once, I gazed at a night sky brimming with stars and crisscrossed by the Milky Way—something rare back in twenty-first-century Korea. So poetic, stirring the soul.
"Before my bed, the moon's glow like frost upon the floor. I raise my head to view the bright moon, then bow it, thinking of my home."
"You've already memorized that... that..."
"It's Li Bai, sir."
I answered quickly before Kim Ja-geun got embarrassed.
—Ja-geun, oh Ja-geun. If a seven-year-old foreigner knows more than you, what are we coming to...
The jar ghost fretting over Joseon's future? What a weird world.
"Right. Ahem. So you've already learned Li Bai and Du Fu?"
"Not learned, per se. The poem just seeped into my heart, so I memorized it."
Yeah, yeah. True enough.
Though it seeped in about... a hundred and eighty years from now, give or take.
Most Chinese folks I met back then went nuts if I recited a Li Bai poem. Once, some bastard snarled, "The Gao-li punks are stealing Li Bai now!" He got exorcised courtesy of our company's Communist Party connections. We paid a fortune in "friendship fees."
"Do you want to return to England?"
"I love Joseon, but with brother and sister in England, shouldn't I at least let them know I'm alive? That's true sibling love."
"Then, if we could send word you're alive, would you stay in Joseon?"
"Eh, they'd still worry if I'm really okay. I should go show my face, reassure them, then come back."
Kim Ja-geun nodded.
"You seem to have internalized Confucius and Mencius already. Nothing more to say."
"If you'll have me back, I'll visit Joseon again after seeing home. Not as a castaway, but properly."
"Just hearing it is beautiful."
A moment later, I bowed to Kim Ja-geun and headed to my room.
Long after I left, he kept staring at the night sky.
A while later.
I donned the finest clothes the Andong Kim clan had made for me, dressed to the nines.
"Clothes make the man."
"Wow, you look sharp. A proper young nobleman."
Not old enough for a topknot, so ponytail hairstyle. They seemed genuinely impressed, not just lip service. Looked dashing enough.
Yes.
Now, I was heading to the palace.
—Don't chicken out.
Do I look scared?
No way. Just thrilled thinking about the sales pitch. Thrilled, not scared!
In my first life, no amount of hustling would've gotten me a pingpingi meeting. But now, not even ten, I'm off to see the king. My talents aren't blooming—they're exploding.
—Joseon kings seem closer to Jeong-eun-i than pingpingi... Both Korean, huh. Young bloodline carry.
Keep drumming that beat.
Why the sudden palace summons?
The king wasn't studying. Weird as it sounds, that's it.
"The ancestors held morning, midday, and evening lectures three times a day, and even then, they honed their scholarship in small and night sessions. Yet whenever something comes up, Your Highness calls off the lectures, studying less than not. How can learning grow?"
The no-holds-barred critic? Prime Minister Yi Ji-yeon, of course. The guy who beheads Catholics like chopping brush could mouth off to the king too.
Honestly, pushing five sessions a day on barely thirteen-year-old Heonjong? No way he'd buy it. But the court officials were sweating bullets.
And who pulled out the extreme remedy named Arthur Leigh? The Grand Royal Dowager in regency, apparently.
—Not a bad idea, kinda.
True.
But the Grand Royal Dowager... she's Kim Ja-geun's sister. Andong Kim clan.
—Oof.
Was this really just "The king's slacking, so let's sic a prodigy kid on him for motivation"? I doubt it.
Hiding my unease, I entered the palace with Kim Ja-geun. After weaving through the maze, we reached what seemed like a side room. To my twenty-first-century eyes, all the palace buildings looked the same—I had no clue where we were.
"Aseul."
"Yes, my lord."
"I've arranged everything. Today's lecture will be much easier than usual, just what you learned last time. Answer well, got it?"
"Yes, my lord. No worries!"
"Finish well, and I'll give you something delicious. Good luck."
Kim Ja-geun, not attending the lecture, gave light bows to the lecture officials and left. I nailed the perfectly polite greeting, scoring more points. But no familiar names among the officials. Hmm, combat power: 5.
A short wait.
Finally, the king of this land appeared.
Pretending not to stare, I scanned the young monarch: refined princeling vibe, handsome, but with an edgy prickliness. If this were a drama, he'd be the chaebol heir spitting clichés like "You're the first to treat me this way."
"His eyes really are blue. This is Aseul?"
"Yes, Your Highness."
"Good. All of you, leave us."
The lecture officials' eyes bulged.
"What do you mean, Your Highness?"
"Wasn't I called here to watch this kid study and feel motivated to hit the books harder? But I suspect Grandmama the Dowager conspired with the Chief Scholar to prep everything in advance..."
"That's not—"
"I'm curious if this kid's truly the once-in-millennia genius everyone's buzzing about, or just hype from busybodies. So I'll test his knowledge myself. Out—all of you."
"Your Highness!!"
"Why doubt Grand Royal Dowager?"
"Out, I said!"
The thirteen-year-old king breathed fire, and the officials slunk away.
Great, my cue to bow and head home—
"Where do you think you're going? Sit."
"Pardon?"
"What does a seven-year-old know? No need for formalities—just sit. Anyone outside?"
"You called, Your Highness?"
"Bring some snacks kids like."
Soon, colorful rice cakes including yakgwa were laid before us. Power, huh. Look at that glossy shine. Driving me nuts. My seven-year-old body reacted first.
"Look at him drooling."
"N-no, Your Highness."
"No need to play coy. Eat up."
Couldn't refuse the king offering personally, so I dug in. As expected, delicious.
Grinning as I inhaled the yakgwa, he propped his chin lazily, slouching utterly.
"What's your name?"
"Aseul, Your Highness."
"Right. What'd Kim Ja-geun tell you? Cram and recite in front of me?"
Hmm. Tricky.
—Tricky? How?
Hostility toward Kim Ja-geun and the Dowager? Or just resentment at nagging to study?
And me—side irritation, or pity for a child actor pawn?
Need to read the room.
"They prepped me on today's material."
"Knew it!"
"But I'm brilliant! I study great!"
I shot my hand up. He scoffed like it was laughable. A sixth-grader lording over an un-enrolled kindergartener—fair.
"You study well, huh."
"Yes! Back home, everyone praised me as smart! The lord called me a prodigy!"
"Even Western barbarians must know not to lie before the king, customs aside. Confident?"
"Of course, Your Highness!"
"Ha! If true, I'll carry you on my shoulders and give you a pony. Lie, and you and Kim Ja-geun face serious trouble."
Heonjong grinned, opening a book.
Two hours later.
The eunuchs fainted at the sight of a barbarian perched on the king's shoulders.