Chapter 100: Even the Absolute Being Is a First-Time Dad
Absolute One's First Time Being a Dad - Episode 100
Breakfast time.
"Seol, say 'ah'..."
Kang-jun, who had been feeding Seol, looked extremely displeased as he alternated his gaze between Crabsley and Iriel.
Chuka chuka! Triple double!
Now traveling around the world!
Crabsley was absentmindedly chewing his food while completely absorbed in playing "Let's Play Marble!" on his phone.
"Oh no, I over-trimmed the chin too much and ended up warping the background too..."
Iriel was half-heartedly picking at her meal while editing some selfies she took yesterday.
Unable to hold back any longer, Kang-jun let out a deep sigh and spoke up.
"When you're eating, you should focus on eating. What are you all doing staring at your phones?"
Then he made a firm declaration.
"Both of you, hand over your phones."
"Wh-what...?"
"They're confiscated for now. That's final."
At this, Crabsley and Iriel immediately clutched their phones tightly and began pleading.
"W-we humbly apologize..."
"P-please give us one more chance..."
But Kang-jun was resolute.
"No, no negotiations, hand them over."
If he didn't correct their bad "smartphone habits" now...
He judged it might negatively affect Seol's upbringing in the future.
"You two were playing with your phones all night, weren't you? Even at the table, you're not eating, just staring at your phone screens..."
Kang-jun asked Seol:
"Seol, what do we do when we eat?"
"Eat food!"
"And what about doing other things? Should we or shouldn't we?"
"No do other things!"
After getting this answer ("See?"), Kang-jun securely pocketed the surrendered phones and added:
"You two are practically addicted."
At this, Seol asked:
"Daddy, what's 'addicted'?"
Kang-jun pondered for a moment before explaining in terms a three-year-old could understand:
"When you can't stop thinking about something all day and can't do what you're supposed to, we call that 'being addicted.'"
Upon hearing this explanation, Seol's expression suddenly darkened.
"Then Seol get scolded too?"
"Huh?"
"Seol addicted too."
Just as Kang-jun was saying "Huh?" in confusion...
Sigh...
Seol let out a little sigh and explained:
"Seol always thinking about Daddy. Teacher say study important but Seol just want play with Daddy and eat snacks..."
Seol began counting off her "addiction symptoms" on her tiny fingers one by one.
"Sniff... Seol get scolded too..."
At that moment...
Clatter!
Kang-jun dropped his chopsticks...
"My Lord! Are you alright-?"
"My Lord!"
"Lady Iriel, water first—!"
Chaos ensued.
Soo-bin affixed a paper filled with various "rules" to the refrigerator with a magnet.
"Perfect..."
It was a handwritten list of smartphone usage rules that Soo-bin had meticulously prepared:
After reviewing the contents, Soo-bin nodded in satisfaction and murmured, "Perfect."
At the very bottom of the paper were even the signatures (or rather, seals) of Crabsley and Iriel.
Soo-bin then turned her head slightly to look at the two fidgeting behind her.
"You'll keep your promise, right?"
At Soo-bin's question...
"Yes, My Lady. Of course."
"We shall guard it with our lives."
As Crabsley and Iriel answered in perfect unison like a choir, Soo-bin returned their confiscated smartphones.
"I trust you all."
Thus, Soo-bin returned the temporarily confiscated "smartphones" to them...
"And if you break the rules even once, there'll be no mercy—permanent confiscation," Kang-jun added as a warning.
"Sis, I'll take Seol to daycare and be right back."
Just as Kang-jun was holding Seol's hand and stepping out the front door...
"Oh? Bong-gu?"
Bong-gu, who happened to be coming up the stairs, spotted Kang-jun and immediately called out.
"Brother, perfect timing."
"What's up? Something wrong?"
"Are the elders home right now?"
"Yeah, they're inside."
"Mind if I say hello quickly?"
"Sure, go ahead..."
With a "Excuse me then...", Bong-gu stepped past Kang-jun into the house...
"Elders, this is really too much..."
At Bong-gu's words, filled with resentment as he looked at Crabsley, everyone exchanged puzzled glances...
"What's going on? What happened?"
At Kang-jun's question, Bong-gu answered:
"While I should have blocked small payments to begin with, and that's my fault... but how could you spend so much in just one night...?"
Kang-jun immediately glared at Crabsley and asked:
"What? You made small payments?"
At this, Crabsley frantically waved his hands as if he had no idea what was being talked about and began rambling:
"M-my Lord, I humbly report that this lowly servant doesn't even know what these 'small payments' you speak of are..."
Kang-jun pressed further:
"Did you do something weird?"
To which Crabsley answered:
"W-well, I did copy money..."
After muttering "Copy money?" to himself, Kang-jun realized something was wrong and quietly asked Soo-bin:
"Sis, I'm really sorry, but could you take Seol to daycare for me today?"
Soo-bin replied, "Huh? Sure..." and left with Seol, glancing back repeatedly as they exited the house...
"Hey, what nonsense is this?"
At this, Crabsley immediately opened the game "Let's Play Marble!" on his phone and brought up the payment screen.
"See for yourself."
Crabsley then repeatedly pressed the payment button...
[ Payment of KRW 100,000￦ completed. ]
[ Payment of KRW 100,000￦ completed. ]
[ Payment of KRW 100,000￦ completed. ]
[ Payment of KRW 100,000￦ completed. ]
After showing everyone the payment completion screens, he added:
"Ta-da!"
Kang-jun asked back:
"Ta-da?"
Crabsley nodded and explained the "money copying method" he had discovered:
"As you can see, all the in-game currency was properly credited, but not a single won disappeared from the 'allowance' money in my drawer."
Then, while keeping his eyes fixed on the screen and wiggling his fingers, he mixed in some slang he'd learned from part-time workers:
"My Lord, why don't you install 'Let's Play Marble!' too and start farming that sweet honey?"
Iriel's eyes widened as she gasped, "Oh..." and began praising Crabsley excessively...
"How wise and brilliant..."
Crabsley, swelling with pride, replied "No need for flattery" and began humming:
"Let's play marble, play together~♬"
At that moment, Bong-gu sighed deeply and stared at the payment confirmation message that had just arrived.
"Sigh."
Assuming it was his own fault for not warning them about small payments beforehand, Kang-jun patted Bong-gu's shoulder and said:
"I'll pay you back, so try to understand. Looks like he really hates losing and bought some game items..."
Then he took out his wallet and actually started scolding Bong-gu:
"Hey, and what's wrong with spending a little money on games? Why'd you have to come here and complain..."
"Brother..."
"Damn, I didn't take you for such a petty guy. How much could he have spent anyway..."
Then, opening his wallet, he said:
"How much? I'll pay you right now."
"In cash?"
"What? Should I transfer it?"
Bong-gu vaguely replied, "No, it's not that..." and added:
"It's just... the amount is a bit large..."
Kang-jun chuckled and replied:
"How much could it be? A few hundred thousand won at most? Good thing I withdrew plenty of cash..."
Then Bong-gu answered:
"Brother... it's nine million won."
"Ninety thousand?"
"No... nine million."
After saying this, Bong-gu added:
"Honestly, it's partly my fault for not setting a payment limit, and given all you've done for me, I didn't come here to get the money back, just to warn..."
As high-income Hunters, their credit cards and phones often came with unusually high spending limits.
Bong-gu considered this disaster his own fault for not being more careful and hadn't actually come to get the money back...
But he thought this was a good opportunity to firmly warn them about "small payments," which is why he'd rushed over.
"Nine million..."
After being momentarily speechless and mentally calculating the cash in his wallet, Kang-jun glanced at Crabsley.
"Let's play marble, play together~♬"
Crabsley was still completely absorbed in fiddling with his phone...
"I'll transfer the money right away."
"Really, it's fine..."
"And we'll be more careful."
Kang-jun added through gritted teeth:
"Very careful."
While the amount wasn't significant compared to his bank balance, it was clear they urgently needed to improve their "spending habits."
"Lady Iriel, if you go outside, my sister should be there."
"Yes, my Lord."
"Could you go out somewhere with her for a few hours?"
After replying "As you command," Iriel immediately headed outside...
"In the meantime, just relax and watch some TV."
Having said this, Kang-jun suddenly walked to the dining table and snapped off one of the chair legs...
"Eek!"
With one hand holding the chair leg that had become an impromptu club, and the other gripping Crabsley by the scruff of his neck, he disappeared into a room.
Whack!
Whack!
Whack!
The sound of beating echoed.
"AAAAAH-!"
Amidst the screams...
"Nine million? Take nine hits."
An angry shout rang out...
"My Lord, that's not it—"
Crabsley's desperate cry could be heard:
"The money really was copying itself—!"
Evening time.
"Where's the elder?"
At Soo-bin's question, Kang-jun answered:
"He won't be back today."
"Huh?"
"Something came up."
Soo-bin asked again:
"And one chair is missing?"
"Yeah, something came up."
"What happened?"
At that moment, Soo-bin noticed the handwritten rules she had posted on the refrigerator that morning.
"Hmm?"
A new rule had been added:
Violators will be immediately executed. Keep this in mind.
Not only was it written in bold red marker, but several asterisks were added for emphasis.
"Oh?"
Nodding, she murmured:
"Come to think of it, I did forget that one."
In any case, it was a peaceful evening.