Chapter 55
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 55
Chapter Title: Cunning Town, Party Quest #1
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Gale-nim was a generous noble.
He even gave us a carriage to ride in.
"It's Windia's personal carriage. She'll be 'recovering' at home for a while, so she won't need something like this."
Hermit marveled in admiration.
"—Wow, it's enchanted with [Warm-Cool Magic]."
"What kind of magic?"
"It's a spell that keeps it cool in summer and warm in winter."
"Wow, isn't this better than our lodging!"
"It's tricky to enchant onto an object because it requires fine adjustments."
The ride was smooth, and the luggage compartment was spacious.
The seats were plenty for four people, with enough room to stretch out our legs.
The only problem was who would drive the carriage.
"Hermit, do you know how to drive a carriage?"
"I've always been the type to sit back comfortably."
"That's the trouble with delicately raised young ladies."
"Hah? What're you talking about?"
"It's just surprising how little you can actually do."
"Newbie, what about you? Can you drive one?"
"I'm more the horse-stealing type, not the carriage-driving type."
Puhahaha!
We burst into pointless laughter.
Having received such generous rewards put everyone in high spirits.
At that moment, the Moltma horse neighed as if mocking us—prrrrt!
It started pulling the carriage on its own with a clop-clop.
"Whoa! It's just taking off!"
"Newbie, hop on!"
The Moltma knew the way back to the Great Wall and headed straight there.
Hermit was impressed.
"Wow, this horse is seriously smart! It understands everything we say!"
"Hehe, told ya!"
Heater, AC, and even cruise control.
A flawless carriage that could hold its own anywhere.
With that kind of leisure,
I gazed out the window, reflecting on the events of the past few days.
We'd caught Dvora and unpacked the Black Satchel.
"That devil... did she die?"
The abandoned mine had completely collapsed, its entrance gone.
Surely even Demon General Balduruk had been crushed inside?
Hermit shook her head at my question.
"It's an ancient demon, so it probably survived that. You'd need the Imperial Four Saints to take it down—"
The Imperial Four Saints meant superhumans like Major General Leiden—level 20s.
Humans who had transcended mortal limits.
'Whales who've dumped 5.2 billion Ether just into levels—!'
Those people might be able to slay the demon.
But Hermit was pessimistic.
"They're all too busy to even gather."
"Yeah?"
One of the Four Saints, Bane, had defected and become the Emperor's impostor.
Major General Leiden was missing.
What about the other two?
Come to think of it, I didn't even know who they were.
They had nothing to do with me, so I'd never been curious.
'But things are different now.'
'If those people can kill Balduruk...'
I needed to know ahead of time.
The items Balduruk would drop were sure to be incredibly useful to me.
'There was a thief essential in its item drop table.'
The problem was that the Saints' heroic pockets had a much higher claim on it.
Someday, I might have to target their pouches.
"Are all the Imperial Four Saints super busy people?"
I asked casually.
If I said I was eyeing their pockets, Hermit would freak out.
Oblivious to my intentions, she showed off her knowledge.
"I've heard the Extermination Monk never leaves the capital. And the Slaughterer rarely steps out of his forge!"
Extermination Monk.
Slaughterer.
"The heroes' nicknames sound like serial killers or something."
"That's because they're derogatory names given by heteroraces like the Erdar."
Ah, from the Erdar perspective, the Four Saints must be demonic butchers.
Suddenly, I envied their titles.
I wanted the Erdar trembling at my name too.
Just my existence striking fear into them.
'Yor the Mass Murderer.'
Heh heh heh, even thinking about it fries my frontal lobe.
"Hermit, how about 'Yor the Vicious'? As my nickname!"
"Newbie, nicknames aren't something you make up—they're given by your enemies!"
Before we knew it, our chatter had brought us to the Great Wall.
"Good job, Moltma."
I stroked its neck and fed it a carrot.
But it wasn't hungry and shook its head before heading to the stables.
—Prrihiiing! The mares in the stable got noisy.
They were nuzzling up to Moltma—it was apparently a total heartthrob.
"Hermit, next year we might see a bunch of cruise-control foals."
"What? What's cruise control?"
"It means even in the horse world, talented ones get all the recognition."
Beasts and humans are the same.
Handsome, capable guys are popular with the ladies.
'The conclusion is, I need to earn more Ether.'
Kya, Ether!
The answer to every problem!
Is there anything greater in this world?
"Alright, Hermit, I'm gonna go deliver Dvora."
To earn Ether, I had to turn in the captured Dvora to the Thieves' Guild.
That would settle things with the guild and the rival party too.
"Don't get too chummy with those thieves. They're goblin-level scum!"
Hermit grimaced.
She hated thieves.
Probably because they'd stabbed her in the back twice already.
"Goblins?"
"Yeah! Monsters named after the ancient word 'kobalos,' which means 'thief' in the old tongue. Know that?"
Hermit's ancient language lecture was starting.
Yaaawn—I was already getting sleepy.
"Goblins betray humans, steal goods, sneak into villages, and kidnap women! Thieves do the same!"
Got it.
Goblins must be the thieves' cousins.
Even I've heard they pull the same stunts.
"Anyway, Hermit, you handle reporting to Hammer."
I headed to the restroom at the Great Wall.
Knock knock.
No response for some reason.
"Germain sis around?"
I cracked the door open and saw Germain hanging upside down from the ceiling.
Upside down on the wall!
So freaking cool!
"Sis, what're you doing right now!"
"Breathing."
"Hehehe, you're no good at jokes either, sis."
Swoosh.
I reached into the Black Satchel.
And pulled out Dvora.
"You crazy son of a—!"
Even prepared, she was loud.
"Yaaaahhh—!"
Shrieeeek—so damn noisy.
Germain clicked her tongue at Dvora.
"Nice work. I figured it'd take at least a month."
"Almost did. Why didn't you tell me she was Bane's apprentice?"
I nearly got screwed.
Germain chuckled at my complaint.
"If I had, you'd have gotten cold feet and botched the job."
Hearing that, it made sense.
If I'd known Dvora was Bane's apprentice?
I wouldn't have pulled off such a reckless plan.
I'd have been overly cautious—
—and likely dragged into Dvora's pace and failed.
"Little bro, I heard the Night Thieves' Guild is wiped out too? How'd you manage that?"
"Oh, a bunch of stuff happened."
"Kukuku, impressive work. The guild elders say they won't antagonize your party anymore."
"Ooh! Perfect!"
Just as planned.
But Germain still looked troubled.
"Still, the guild's unstable. Now there's talk of opening a new branch to handle it."
"A new branch?"
"Send the malcontents far away but keep them under control."
Poke.
Germain jabbed my side.
"You wanna take charge of a branch? Be guild leader?"
Me, leading a Thieves' Guild branch?
Guild Leader Yor.
Just thinking about it was badass.
But Dvora cackled hysterically.
"A snot-nosed Blessed brat as guild leader? The guild's standards have really dropped! Puhahaha!"
"Oh dear, who was caught by that brat again~?"
Thwack.
Germain struck Dvora's neck.
Dvora's eyes rolled back white as she flopped down.
"But the elders seem to think like her. I recommended you for the new guild leader, but they'd already picked someone else."
No way.
They skipped me?
"Who the hell is it!"
"It's someone whose stock's been skyrocketing for years. Weasel—a promising star among the young thieves."
"Weasel!"
That name brought a smile.
Weasel as the new branch leader?
A thief who made friends fast—plenty of talent and aptitude there.
I was starting to accept it when Germain hugged me comfortingly.
"Don't be too disappointed. Being guild leader ain't that fun!"
Squish squish.
Pressed against her leather outfit, Germain's chest was huge.
Come to think of it, was this my first hug?
This warm embrace.
Strange, embarrassing, and I wanted it to last.
It even made my head go dumb.
So I quickly pulled away awkwardly.
"What's wrong? Got a stiffy or something?"
"No, nothing like that! Sis, you said you're from Cunning Town originally, right?"
"That was ages ago."
"Actually, I'm thinking of heading there. Give me some info."
Sis might know the way.
Or tips on how to act, things to watch out for.
Germain laughed heartily.
"Don't go there."
"Huh?"
"The best survival tip is never to set foot there in the first place!"
Whoosh.
With that, she shimmied up the vent without a sound.
Even dragging Dvora along, silent as a ghost.
"Yor! You crazy bastard!"
Back with the party, Hammer hugged me fiercely.
His hard armor squished my face, but this had its own appeal.
"Ugh, that hurts!"
"Summoning a devil to collapse the mine? You could've all died!"
"But we lived, right?"
"Yeah! You lucky son of a gun!"
Hammer ruffled my hair wildly.
I showed him the serpent scales from our trip.
"Check these out!"
"Ooooh! What material is this? Looks a nightmare to process!"
"Hehehe, armor from this would be light and tough—game changer, huh?"
"Gonna need a ton of Ether just for processing!"
Whack—Hammer slapped my back.
"Then gear up—we're heading out!"
"Out? Where to?"
"Thieves' Guild beef's settled, so time to farm Ether!"
"Ooh!"
I set out with the party.
Destination: the Great Plains.
—Kweeek!
—Pweeek!
Flaming gazelles swarmed out.
Last time, we got iced fighting these—
"Thunderbolt Throwing Knife!"
Pew pew!
The lightning-wrapped knives roasted them in seconds.
「+500 Ether」
「Gazelle Fang: Utterly useless.」
Ether and byproducts rained down.
In half a day, we raked in about 2 million Ether.
50k a day per person.
Feels damn good.
Hammer was thrilled too.
"No other party can farm trash mobs like this for Ether!"
With light hearts, we returned—to the strategy room before we knew it.
"Hammer boss!"
As we were unwinding, Commander Jeremiah summoned us.
He unrolled a scroll and read it before Hammer.
"To Hammer and his party members: Proceed to Cunning Town and retrieve a certain 'item.'"
"To Cunning Town?"
Ooh!
A chance to go to Cunning Town.
I'd been agonizing over how to convince the party to go.
'Perfect timing—luck's on my side!'
But Hammer crossed his arms and shook his head.
"Even so, that's a suicide mission. Retrieve an item from a lawless city with no rules—"
"I know."
"The road there alone is perilous. Camping in Night Land to boot."
"But we have to go."
"Why?"
"—Direct order from the Imperial Council."
The mood shifted instantly.
Hahk hahk—crows began cawing in the early autumn chill.
"Hammer Party, you are hereby assigned a Class 0 classified mission."