Chapter 100
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 100
Chapter Title: Monster Hunting #3
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100 – Monster Hunting #3
100 – Monster Hunting #3
As I said before, the net is a cheat item.
Once it grabs you, your mind goes all fuzzy!
“Fuck, what the hell is this!”
Nimble, caught in the net, flailed her arms and legs while throwing a tantrum.
“You raccoon bitch! What the fuck do you think you're doing!”
Grrr-.
Nimble's pissed-off snarls made my knees shake.
But Hermit didn't even snort in disdain—she actually looked thrilled.
“Hehe! 300 million Ether! 300 million! Woo yeah!”
In a way, this was a natural progression.
To Night Land explorers who'd kill over a single treasure chest, 300 million?
That's enough to change your life.
Of course, I chose the pretty Nimble over 300 million.
But to another woman like Hermit, Nimble's looks probably didn't matter.
In my case, it'd be like slapping a 300 million bounty on Felix.
Even I'd grab the net first if that happened.
At that point, it's just tempting.
‘Why doesn't Felix have a bounty on him!’
‘If he did, I wouldn't even have to agonize over this!’
Grrr-.
Right then, Nimble started growling even harder.
“I was already pissed, but this works out perfect! I'm gonna rip your skull open!”
Nimble's mouth stretched wide, her face elongating.
Fur sprouted in an instant, turning her into a ferocious wolf.
“You, stay right there!”
As Nimble tore through the net and squeezed her face out through the gaps, Hermit yelled at me.
“Partner! What are you doing? The 300 million's about to escape!”
“Eek—me?”
“What! Yor! You're with that witch too?”
Nimble snapped at me.
I panicked, feeling like I'd been hit by an arrow out of nowhere.
“No, I'm not really on anyone's side—.”
“Then grab that Hermit bitch and knock her out!”
Grrr-.
With Nimble, super pissed, barking at me like crazy.
Hermit and Nimble's glares pinned me from both sides—it was pure hell.
Why couldn't these two girls just get along?
It felt like choices were floating in front of my eyes.
「Help Hermit and sell Nimble」
「Help Nimble and beat Hermit」
Even a social klutz like me could tell.
If I picked a side here?
The one I didn't choose would hate my guts!
Are all women like this—get close to one, and you drift away from the others?
No miracle half-and-half spicy fried noodles on the menu?
‘Hermit or Nimble—!’
My head felt like it was splitting.
After agonizing, I had no choice but to stand by Nimble and yell at Hermit.
“Hermit! Surrender quietly!”
“Hah? Partner! How could you do this to me!”
Hermit's eyes narrowed into sharp triangles.
Her betrayed, contemptuous glare hit me so hard I felt like dying.
‘But no choice!’
Hermit had that weird constitution—no touching boobs or even kissing.
Nimble, on the other hand... if I ignored the occasional flea jumping from her tail fur, maybe even a kiss, or if things went well, something naughtier.
Whether she knew my reasoning or not, Hermit blushed furiously and raged.
“Partner, how could you betray me? Even when others called you a thief and looked down on you, I always had your back!”
...Wait, Hermit, when did you ever do that?
The Hermit when I first got here was totally hostile toward thief-me.
“Hermit! Your memory seems a bit distorted!”
“What! If you don't help catch Nimble, I'm not giving back this crown!”
Swoosh-.
Right then, Hermit pulled the 'Crescent Crown' from her waist pouch.
My hair stood on end.
No way—!?
Hermit holding a valuable item hostage!
As I panicked, Nimble shook her whole body fur.
“You bastard! You really are with her!”
Crunch-. Super pissed Nimble bit my ankle hard.
“Aaaah!”
Nimble bit first when anything bugged her.
That's probably how the rumor spread among monster hunters about the Wall's ankle-biting wolf!
In a way, wasn't this all her own fault?
“You beast bitch! Don't mess with my partner!”
Whoosh-.
A fireball flared in Hermit's hand.
Fwoosh-.
It flew at Nimble, and I had a bad feeling.
Shk-!
Nimble dodged with quick reflexes.
Luckily, the fire went out easily.
Sabrannik's scale armor had high resistance to elements like fire and ice.
Solid performance!
But my heart was tattered like a discarded slipper.
‘I underestimated women!’
Hermit and Nimble.
They were glaring at each other, fuming.
“Nimble, you! You shed fur everywhere and don't even clean the floor!”
“It's gonna get dirty again anyway, why bother?”
“Hah? You sniff out and eat all my hidden snacks like chestnuts and peanuts!”
“Whatever, Hermit, you've got tons of annoying habits too?”
“What!”
“You leave the light on at night reading books, so I can't sleep!”
“I need light to read—darkness ruins your eyes!”
“And every time you move, static shocks piss me off!”
Nimble and Hermit shared a room.
They must've built up a ton of hidden grudges.
This incident was just those boiling over.
Honestly, I had gripes sharing with Felix too.
But my big heart puts up with it, so we get along fine.
Anyway, Hermit and Nimble's voices only got louder.
Time to diffuse the mood.
Everyone's too worked up now.
Yelling like this might attract the 'monster hunters'.
‘Can't run into those guys right now.’
If they spotted Nimble, it'd be chaos.
And I'd probably get it too, since I pickpocketed them.
The issue was calming these two furious girls—.
Only one way in a pinch.
Leverage some authority.
“Ahh, Yona-nim! Captain Ezekiel! Over here! This way!”
I waved wildly at the air.
Nimble, acting all untouchable, startled.
“Wha, Yona?”
Nimble was a loose cannon with everyone—except Yona-nim, who scared her.
Yona-nim petted wolf Nimble whenever he could. Even Nimble couldn't bite a level 20 dragon hero.
“…Ezekiel!”
Hermit jolted too and shut up.
She frantically scanned around, looking desperate.
Hermit feared Captain Ezekiel.
No idea why.
The real problem hit next moment.
“Hmm, I heard my name?”
“You kids, what are you doing in the training grounds this late?”
“Eek, you scared me!”
Captain Ezekiel and Yona-nim actually showed up in the training grounds.
Just like the saying: speak of the tiger, and it appears.
At least it ended Nimble and Hermit's fight for good.
Lucky break.
I scratched my head awkwardly and asked.
“What brings Captain Ezekiel to the Wall this late?”
“We were talking about Yona-nim's return to the capital.”
“Yona-nim's return to the capital?”
“With the Pilgrim family's fall, the capital's security has gaps. Better for Yona-nim to head back ASAP. The imperial council's getting noisy too.”
Captain Ezekiel explained gracefully.
I vaguely knew Yona-nim wasn't meant to stay at the Wall long-term.
“And Yor, I've been promoted—now Colonel Ezekiel.”
“Ooh! Congratulations!”
“Thanks to you all's exploits. Keep up the good work.”
“Hehe, leave it to us!”
Colonel Ezekiel left with a pleasant scent, footsteps fading down the hall.
Anyway, the surprise encounter shut Hermit and Nimble up.
Seizing the moment, I showed everyone the monster scroll and the hunters' map.
“Look at this. The map I stole from the hunters has these marks. Smells suspicious, right? Definitely some big Ether payout.”
“My bounty is 300 million?”
Nimble freaked after hearing the story.
Even for wild-girl Nimble, 300 million was huge?
“Alright, I'm in on this!”
“You, Nimble?”
“I wanna know who's the perv trying to buy me for 300 million. Catch these monsters, and we can meet that 'sponsor' or whatever, right?”
“Well....”
And just like that, Nimble joined the side gig.
Good thing?
As I pondered, Hermit muttered softly.
“Partner, sorry for aiming that spell at you earlier. If Nimble hadn't dodged....”
She mumbled sheepishly, looking genuinely sorry.
Maybe forgive her? She grinned slyly.
“If things go south, we sell Nimble and split it!”
“I heard that, you bitch!”
Hermit bolted as growling Nimble lunged.
Leaving just me and Nimble.
The awkwardness hit hard, but Nimble poked my side and scratched her cheek.
“Honestly, I'd sell Hermit for 300 million too.”
For real?
Do women even have friendships?
“But Yor, you took my side.”
“Hehe, yeah!”
“Ahem... I'm more valuable to you than 300 million Ether? I had no idea you thought of me... like that.”
Whoosh whoosh whoosh-.
Nimble wagged her tail like a helicopter and dashed off.
No clue what that was, but I scored points with her?
My neck itched for some reason.
“Ah, damn! Fleas!”
Anyway, we decided to head to Cunning Town tomorrow morning.
Back in my room, fatigue crashed over me.
“Ahh, I'm beat.”
“Hey, Yor. You thief bastard.”
But Felix, lying in bed, bugged me as I tried to sleep.
He glared, clearly pissed.
“Where's the cake from my desk? How many times have I said speak up before eating? I'm not stopping you.”
“Hey now, don't accuse people lightly. Suspecting me every time something goes missing is a bad habit.”
“It's always been you, the culprit!”
A thought hit me.
Maybe someone like me is why Felix shares a room.
So I sat up and patted his shoulder.
“Hehe, Felix. Be grateful you share with me—it's your lucky break.”
“…What bullshit is that?”
“Anyway, wanna check out Cunning Town's orphanage tomorrow? Weren't you personally investigating orphanages? If you're interested—.”
“Cunning Town Orphanage?”
Felix grabbed my shoulder hard with his one arm.
Then said seriously.
“Dig into that, and it's all-out war with Narakje. You sure you won't die?”
“All-out war? Dunno about that. Could rake in hundreds of millions if it goes well!”
“Hundreds of—?”
Felix's eyes gleamed with greed for a second.
The eyes of a knight who'd sold his soul to materialism.