The Fantasy Every Man Has
Every man has a fantasy he’s entertained at least once in his life. The kind that starts with, “If I were insanely handsome, I would…” And usually, that ellipsis is filled with something involving women. Approaching a girl he likes on the street and confidently asking for her number. Walking into a club and drawing every woman’s eyes with his overwhelming looks. As a man myself, I used to have those fantasies too. But mine were a little… different.
“Huu…”
I was standing in Cheongdam-dong right now, in front of an incredibly famous salon. It was my first time coming to a place like this. For my entire life, I had only ever gone to the neighborhood barber shops. The kind where they didn’t ask questions and just buzzed your head into a sporty cut or a clean undercut. I took a deep breath, shoved both hands into my pockets, and walked inside like it was no big deal.
They said celebrities came here often, and it showed—the entrance steps were made of marble. The grand, luxurious atmosphere was almost overwhelming, but I held it together. I wasn’t some pathetic, basement-dwelling gamer anymore.
“Welcome~ Do you have an appointment?”
“Yeah. One o’clock. Kim Minjun.”
I opened the large door, gave my name at the desk, and the employee checked the list before guiding me to a seat.
“I’m really sorry, but could you wait just a moment? The designer will be right with you. Lunch ran a little late today.”
“Sure.”
I sat down in the styling chair and answered briefly. If I spoke too much, they might realize it was my first time at a place like this. Not that anyone would actually say anything even if they knew. Still, I couldn’t help it. It was like a mild case of paranoia.
Ever since I started caring about my appearance, these high-end salons had terrified me.
—Sir. With a face that wrecked, why on earth would you come to such a luxurious salon? No matter how pretty your hair is, if your face is ugly, there’s no point in dressing it up. Heh.
It wasn’t something anyone had actually said to me. But the fear that they might had kept me from ever stepping foot in a place like this. You could call it an appearance complex. Or the inertia of never bothering to groom myself. All of it had been nothing more than a desperate struggle to avoid letting go of that last thread of hope.
—I don’t dress up, that’s why I look like this. But if I did, wouldn’t I look pretty decent?
That hopeful thought only lasted as long as I didn’t actually try. The moment I started grooming myself, I would have to face reality instead of hope. Because if I tried and still looked bad, then I really was hopeless.
So I had lived my life clinging to that thread of hope while refusing to actually try. But now, I was ready to let go of that thread and face reality head-on. After all, my reality had changed a lot thanks to the Appearance Enhancement.
“Would you like something to drink while you wait?”
“No, I’m fine.”
“Ah, yes.”
The desk employee awkwardly returned to her station. I wasn’t drinking anything because I was on a diet, but I didn’t feel the need to explain. Even after dumping a ton of money into appearance enhancement, I didn’t want my results ruined by belly fat, so I had started dieting. I wasn’t exactly overweight, but after sitting in front of a computer playing games without exercising, I had developed a bit of a gut. There was also some baby fat on my face. And during sex with Mihyun-noona, the way my stomach jiggled had started to bother me. So my dieting goals were to lose the belly fat and slim down my face until my features looked sharper.
“Oh my! I’m so sorry for keeping you waiting~”
“It’s fine. I just got here.”
I had been lost in thought when a middle-aged woman who seemed to be my assigned designer approached me with a flurry of energy. She skillfully adjusted the height of the styling chair and asked,
“It looks like you’ve already washed your hair… You booked a cut. Do you have a style in mind?”
“Ah…”
I took this as my cue and pulled out my phone. I showed her a profile picture of a famously handsome male actor that I had saved in my gallery.
“Make it exactly like this photo.”
“Ah~ You want the Nam Kang-jun hairstyle? Of course, I can do that.”
The designer nodded confidently, as if she had heard this request many times before. Watching her, I felt something that had been binding me snap cleanly in two.
Going back to that male fantasy talk—my long-held delusion had been exactly this. This trivial request. Walking into a luxury salon without a shred of shame, confidently showing a male celebrity’s photo, and asking to look exactly like him. It wasn’t something that only handsome men could do, but at least I had believed I could never do it. So I had thought it was impossibly difficult for me.
But it wasn’t.
In this moment, my fantasy had become reality, yet I didn’t feel any particular thrill. I just felt pathetic and empty for having cowered away from something so simple. Maybe I had been the one tying myself down with that thread all along.
‘When I actually do it, it’s nothing… Why the hell was I so scared?’
Sex, spending money—when I actually did them, they were nothing. Sex was just sex. Money was just money. Showing a male celebrity photo at a salon was the same. Once I did it, I couldn’t understand why I had found it so difficult that it became a fantasy in the first place.
‘That’s why they say only those who’ve eaten meat know how to eat meat.’
I mulled over the phrase that suddenly came to mind. If we were dividing people into those who ate well and those who didn’t, I had been the stupidest kind—the one who never even had the courage to try. It was truly pathetic. And now, a real determination to change was rising inside me.
‘Yeah. From now on, I’m going to try everything. Fuck being scared. I’ll do whatever the hell I want. Everything that turns me on—I’m doing it all.’
Snip. Snip.
Along with the sound of scissors cutting away my messy hair, something inside me changed once again.
“Oh my!! Sir, your hair looks absolutely amazing! You could be an actor!!”
I paid the sixty-thousand-won cut fee and left the salon, recalling what the designer had said. I knew it was lip service. But not all lip service was the same. Like a cocktail, the taste changed completely depending on the ratio of service to sincerity. And the designer’s lip service had quite a strong shot of sincerity mixed in, making it taste rather sweet.
‘The ratio looked about fifty-fifty… Well, even I was a little shocked when I looked in the mirror.’
With the help of a pro designer, the messy overgrown bangs that had reached my eyes were cut away and styled like a male actor’s. Even I felt awkward looking at myself. I had already felt awkward because of the appearance enhancement, but now that my hair looked this good, the awkwardness had doubled. In a good way, of course.
That didn’t mean I took her “you could be an actor” comment at face value. Even after spending twenty million won, I was still just a decent-looking handsome guy. And at 173.2cm, I was still a shorty. 173cm was average, but Koreans had a strong tendency to look down on anything that was merely average. In terms of CSAT scores, it was like a grade 4 or 5. In terms of salary, it was like earning just over 2 million won a month. Both of those were insanely hard to achieve, so they were definitely average, yet in this country, if you wanted to be treated like a person, you had to be far better and earn far more. And of course, you had to be much taller too.
It was infuriating, but I couldn’t exactly run out to Gwanghwamun and protest for average people to be respected. And when I thought about it, I didn’t have much room to talk.
‘Yeah… If we’re talking League of Legends ranks, average is Silver or Gold. And I don’t treat Silver or Gold players like real people either… So I’m the same. Maybe that’s just how humans are?’
While engaging in some painful self-reflection, I took a taxi to the cafe I had spotted on the way to the salon. As a hardcore gamer, I didn’t usually like cafes much, but today was special. My perfectly styled hair had my confidence and sensitivity exploding. I wanted to enjoy the atmosphere of sitting alone in a luxurious Cheongdam-dong cafe with no particular plans, leisurely sipping an espresso.
Even if people called me a kimchi man or a doenjang man, I wouldn’t have any comeback. But since I used to be a gamer, becoming a kimchi man or doenjang man wasn’t that big of a deal.
‘This place is seriously fucking luxurious.’
I entered the cafe, looked around at the interior, and slowly walked toward the counter. I had heard that these days, “outstar” aesthetics and uniquely cute, charming cafes were trending, but this place didn’t seem to care about any of that. It wasn’t cute at all—it was huge, spacious, and ridiculously luxurious. I had sensed something was off from the main entrance, but the moment I stepped inside, the wealth practically vibrated through the air.
The overall concept was white and gold. The chairs were white leather, and the tables were pure white marble. Every finish on the tables and chair legs was plated with gold, and crystal chandeliers hung generously from the very high ceiling. The white marble-like exterior materials reflected the elegant light from the chandeliers, creating an overwhelmingly fantastical lighting effect. I had never been to a Western palace, but it felt exactly like I had stepped into one.
‘Whoa.’
As expected of a cafe that poured insane effort into its interior, the staff were also incredibly beautiful. Behind the counter stood two female employees wearing what appeared to be uniforms—white blouses and neat black skirts. The one on the left had a haughty, prickly cat-like face, while the one on the right had a puppy-like face that made you want to pet her just by looking at her.
My original preference leaned toward the cat on the left, but for some reason, my eyes kept drifting to the puppy on the right. Her eyebrows were dark, but her eyes had heavily drooping tails. Her overall features were soft and round, making her look incredibly cute no matter how many times I looked. Her entire face was a bundle of cuteness, but if I had to pick the critical hit that made my heart thump, it would be her moist—almost wet—eyes that looked like she might cry at any moment, and the slightly upturned corners of her small, tightly pressed lips.
Cute. She was seriously too cute. I wanted to take her home and raise her… but that probably wouldn’t fly, right?
“Welcome~ This is Chanel Le Bella.”
“U-um… Welcome… This is Chanel Le… Bella…”
An incomprehensible situation suddenly unfolded, and the natural flow of my thoughts snapped clean in half. The puppy on the right had followed the cat on the left in greeting me, but her greeting was a complete mess. Without realizing it, I widened my eyes and stared blatantly at the puppy.
How many words was a greeting? She couldn’t even do that properly? Or was she actually a puppy and found human speech difficult? But the cat next to her spoke just fine…
“I’m sorry, sir. This employee is working her first day today. She’s still very inexperienced.”
“S-sorry…”
“No, it’s not that. I was just staring because you’re really cute.”
Oh no. The puppy had lowered her head like she had committed a grave crime just for messing up a greeting, so I tried to comfort her, but my line came out as cheesy as a cheesecake. I had gotten into the habit of complimenting Mihyun-noona without hesitation, so it just slipped out.
“Hic… Th-thank… No… I’m sorry…”
Still, it seemed to have worked. The puppy slowly lifted her head, glancing at me shyly with bright red cheeks as she greeted me again. There were tears pooling in her eyes, and the glimpse I caught of her nostrils was an adorable heart shape.
Even her nostrils were cute. Yeah. It was fine. With murderous cuteness like this, I could probably forgive her even if she splashed coffee on my face. Of course, in return for forgiving her, I’d make sure to feed her properly, so I might subtly threaten her to come live at my house.
“You don’t have to apologize. Everyone’s like that on their first day. Can you take my order?”
“Yes…? Y-yes. You can… order…”
“One iced Americano, please. I’ll pay with card.”
“…One iced Americano… and… card payment…”
Beep—…. Beep—….
The moment I gave my order, the puppy hurriedly stood in front of the POS machine and began pressing buttons with extreme caution. I had ordered the simplest thing possible—just one iced Americano—so it would be easy to ring up, but she was pressing the keys like someone entering a public certificate password they had already messed up four times. She even muttered to herself what she was pressing, moving her finger incredibly slowly.
Somehow she managed to get it right. I could see her expression brighten instantly. It was such a shame she didn’t have a tail or ears. If she did, she would have been wagging her tail furiously with joy.
“The… card…”
“Yes. Should I insert it here?”
“…I can… insert it for you…”
“Then please do.”
The puppy boldly asked for my card, and I handed it to her. She accepted it with both hands very politely, then slid it into the reader with a smooth motion. After the payment went through and the receipt printed, the way she handed my card back carried just a hint of newfound confidence.
“If you take a seat at a table… I’ll bring your drink over…”
“Thanks. And you’re doing well for your first day. You’ll get the hang of it soon.”
I deliberately gave her a little praise. Ever since I had told the puppy she was cute, the cat next to her had been wearing an incredibly sour expression. Seeing that, I could roughly guess what kind of relationship the puppy and cat had.
‘If I play this right, I might be able to seduce her quickly.’
Yes. This was a pretty good opportunity for me.