Chapter 38
Chapter 38
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 38
Chapter Title: The Boy's Name
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The red light faded from the silent boy's eyes. The chain constricting Jade's neck loosened, then shortened back to its original length.
Jade collapsed to the ground, spewing saliva like he was vomiting water. His throat hurt so much that breathing was difficult, let alone swallowing. For a while, his blurred vision didn't clear.
A lukewarm evening desert wind blew in.
In the wind, the boy looked down at Jade. At a glance, he seemed like a sulking child, but up close, it was a pained expression filled with confusion and doubt.
"Name......"
Jade panted before asking.
"......Still can't remember?"
The boy placed a hand on his waist and groaned.
'Considering I spent three years locked in that monastery feeling like time dragged on forever, five hundred years must be unimaginable. No wonder he forgot his name.'
Jade knew well how slowly time passed when confined.
The boy said.
"Come to think of it, I don't remember much else either. Just the moment I got chained here. 'A seed that hasn't even sprouted!'"
Jade quickly changed the subject to interrupt his snarling anger, which was frightening.
"You might not remember other things, but surely your name? They must have called you by it—try recalling......"
"They didn't call me by name."
"Then what did they call you?"
The boy seemed to rummage through his memories for a long time, then counted on his fingers.
"Little bastard, son of a bitch, damn punk, fucking dogshit spawn....... There were more, uh, like, let me see...."
Jade stopped him before worse curses came.
"Not that. No proper name?"
"Ah, forget it! You gonna release this or not?"
The boy shouted as if forgetting was Jade's fault and thrust out his manacled wrists.
"I told you, no."
"Ugh, you're giving me a headache."
The boy clutched his head.
"You think I can't kill you? It's true my body's not as responsive as before, but......"
Jade shook his head immediately.
"Even if not, you could easily kill someone like me."
"Then you aren't scared of how I look?"
"First time meeting, maybe, but seeing this power, anyone would fear you. Including me."
The boy plopped down in front of Jade, who still couldn't stand. He shoved his face uncomfortably close and said.
"Earlier......"
"Earlier?"
"In the cave......"
"......Why'd you say sorry to me?"
"Because you in the story were pitiful."
"I'm not pitiful."
"You've been deceived and hurt by so many adults. Every time I heard your story, every time you fell for lies, it felt like my fault. Humanity's fault, angels' fault, dwarves' fault—and no one apologized to you. That was heartbreaking."
The boy tilted his head as if hearing this for the first time.
"Should I have gotten apologies? I barely remember, so who knows."
The boy sparkled his eyes like the kids who found Zerba Monastery.
"What was I like in your story? Tell me."
Jade first checked his surroundings. He wanted to say he didn't want to talk about this amid demon corpses. But the demon bodies soon turned to black ash, seeping into the sand or blowing away in the wind.
The demons killed by the boy's hand vanished differently from those struck by the light of annihilation.
Jade began the tale, somewhat relieved.
"Once upon a time, there was a boy......"
"That's me, right?"
The boy asked eagerly.
"Yeah. I don't know your name yet, so couldn't say 'Once upon a time, you lived......'"
The boy nodded.
Jade slowly began.
♦
"It wasn't a dwarf kid who imprisoned me, but an angel in disguise?"
When Jade finished, the boy asked in surprise.
"That's what I heard."
"How could I not recognize that?"
"Who knows? Master of disguise?"
"No way......"
The boy muttered, then asked again.
"I don't remember that time well either, so how do you know so much?"
"I want to ask you the same. Is what I just told you your real story? Any exaggerations......"
"It's true as I remember. Order might be a bit off."
Jade couldn't hold back his burning question, even if it meant dying by the boy's hand right then.
"Uh......, the angels' realm really exists?"
"It does."
The answer was so simple and quick it was hard to trust.
"Where?"
"Don't remember the location."
"Then the dwarves' world too?"
The boy pointed at the ground.
"Yeah. Underground....... Don't remember the entrance. If I did, I'd storm it and smash everything now!"
"I get it. If even one person had apologized from the start, you probably wouldn't have rampaged. But the human king deceived you and sent you away instead."
"Doesn't matter. Let me go on that adventure."
"If philosophers had listened seriously and advised you, you wouldn't have wandered a hundred years."
"Doesn't matter. Found the angels' realm."
"If angels had welcomed you properly, no more suffering."
"Doesn't matter. Got my own weapon. Don't know where it went, though."
The boy looked around, as if searching for the 'unbreakable staff.'
"You didn't need to fight angels. Could've joined other angels in heavenly armies against demons."
"Doesn't matter. Fought demons anyway without joining."
"You got deceived by angels too. But they attacked you."
"Doesn't matter. Couldn't catch or kill me."
"Then got trapped in that bet."
"Doesn't...... Hm, that matters."
"From what I see, you didn't do anything wrong, yet everyone treated you like the villain. Deciding to become a fallen angel destroying the world wasn't your fault."
The boy just listened without retort.
"So that's why I said sorry. Long ago, I thought someone should apologize to you, and if I got the chance, I'd do it."
"Hmph! Pretty words. Think that'll change my mind about killing you?!"
Jade shot back in the boy's own tone.
"Doesn't matter. Doesn't make my apology a lie or hypocrisy."
"You only know me from stories. Pitying me without knowing the real me? I wasn't portrayed as some innocent little honeybee larva in your tale—I ain't that nice."
"Why, run out of things to say?"
"No, that's not......"
Jade couldn't hold back and asked.
"What the hell do 'honeybee' and 'flower bud' mean, anyway?"
"Can't tell from the words? Insults."
"How's that an insult....... Never mind. Not important."
Jade sighed and continued.
"The important thing is you're far kinder than you think."
"Pretty words again. Keep talking crap, and I'll kill you chains or no."
"Hm, thought about it—better to die painlessly if I'm dying anyway."
"You see this guy?"
"You said you'd fall yourself. That's proof you're pure and kind."
"How's that proof? Want me to list my evil deeds? You'd faint, you scrawny weakling."
"A farmer's wife, raped by a noble, got burned as a witch for seducing him instead. Her child drowned as a demon spawn. A priest stabbed a pregnant passerby in rage over gambling debts, claimed she carried a devil and he killed it—got off scot-free. A murderer who killed his healer couple accused them of stealing donations to Rotikan, got his sins forgiven boldly."
Jade placed a hand on the boy's shoulder, who just blinked his big eyes.
"Go on, top that if you can."
The boy didn't answer.
Jade gripped his shoulder firmly.
"You can't fall. You don't even know what falling is. You're just angry. I know you won't change your mind about killing me. In the story, you always did what you intended. So listen. After killing me, look at my body and think: Is this really what you wanted? Will you feel refreshed like after those demons?"
Jade removed his hand from the boy's shoulder and waited.
The boy grimaced and said.
"Were you really prepared to die by me?"
"Dying doesn't faze me. My soul died when my parents passed."
The boy slowly tilted his head.
"Bullshit."
"What?"
"Never once thought I wanted apologies. But hearing you, maybe I did. How? I'm not weak enough to want that. This is bullshit!"
"Having those feelings doesn't make you weak."
Jade nodded, and the boy asked.
"I didn't do wrong?"
"You didn't. You deserved apologies."
"Really? Ugh, why can't I remember?"
The boy tapped his head.
'One hit from that hand, and I'm dead.'
Frightened, Jade leaned back slightly.
The boy yanked his long red hair and said.
"Don't remember much, but this I'm sure of. I just wanted to know who I was. Then I learned I was an angel. Wanted to do any angel duty. It had to matter. Because angels! Guarding grapes no one steals ain't worthwhile!"
"Total un-angelic lie. If the archangel were here, I'd demand he apologize to you."
"Yeah, now I get it. I wanted the archangel to say sorry back then."
"Could've ended without fighting angels."
The boy shook his head.
"Nah. Honestly, I loved fighting angels."
"You did?"
"Yeah, loved it!"
The boy jumped up, yelling.
"Angels came to mountains if I hid there, seas if in oceans. Swarmed everywhere! Just to find me! Fight me! Guys who ignored my pleas to fight now scrambled to battle me."
"So those fights...... were fun?"
"Best moments of my life! Didn't kill angels. That'd make it war. They didn't kill me either, just capture. So it was fighting."
The boy raised his voice in excitement.
"Sometimes? Duels! One-on-one! Dwarves came far for bets with me. Elves did distant target contests, orcs throwing matches. I won all."
"Elves? Orcs?"
"Yeah! Some humans, bad at physical, tried brains. Chess, dice. Won those too. Loved winning. Didn't start fights, but loved them."
The boy gestured around.
"Fighting demons like just now? Great. No guilt killing them—pure fun. Know why I can't kill you? You can't fight at all."
"Lucky me. Needed you 'cause I'm weak, came for that, and now that's why I live."
The boy recoiled as if hearing forbidden words.
"What'd you say I did?"
"Needed you."
"Why?"
"Saw earlier. I'm hunted. Probably tons trying to stop my quest. Journey's 100 parts, I'm not even at 1, already dodged death a hundred times. So came for your help."
"My power's what you need. Not to apologize."
"Planned to if we met, but not why I came."
"I'm gonna destroy the world!"
"Still stubborn? Fine. You won't. Don't pretend when you don't mean it."
"Say it again."
"What?"
"Why'd you seek me?"
"Your power's needed."
"First time anyone's said that."
"First time for me too. Never needed anyone."
Jade struggled up, placed a hand on the boy's head.
"I'm heading east for the Holy Grail. Come with me."
"What about killing you?"
"Forget that pointless resolve."
The boy flinched back.
Jade thought he disliked the head touch.
But suddenly, the boy bellowed. A voice huge enough to echo across the red desert.
The boy turned, started punching the ground. Each hit cracked the red earth.
Boom!
Boom!
Boom!
Under the red sunset, red sand and dust fogged like mist. The boy panted within it.
Jade saw only his heaving shoulders from behind.
'Mad he couldn't keep his resolve to kill me. Lucky. Decided to hold back.'
As Jade relaxed, the boy said.
"Remembered my name."
"Good. What is it?"
The boy answered without turning.
"Ruby......"
"Ruby?"
"Ruby...... something, more after, but don't remember. People never called me by name anyway."
"I'll call it lots from now. Suits your hair color, Ruby."
"Stop."
"Hm? What?"
"That."
"What?"
The boy—no, Ruby—rubbed his eyes with his hand, still not turning.
"No one's treated me kindly. No one's apologized. No one's talked to me eye-to-eye without fear."
When Ruby turned, Jade was startled.
The boy was crying!
Huge teardrops like jewels rolled round down his cheeks from big eyes. Already sparkling pupils glistened with water, shining like gems.
"No one...... said they needed me......"
Jade panicked seeing Ruby cry.
'God, how can he be this cute and pretty?'
Just now, he could've been angel or demon—both too intense emotionally and visually for human hearts.
'So lonely. Crying this hard over just words......'
The 'just' made Jade's eyes tear up.
'Just? I couldn't endure a few years' loneliness, wanted to die—even with Father Danel and Saf caring. But Ruby had no one.'
Jade took Ruby's hand and said.
"You said stop, so once more then no more. I need you, Ruby. Come with me."
Ruby wiped tears once more, nodded.
"Sniff.