Intuition
The day after the founding festival ended, I had lunch alone with His Majesty.
His Majesty thanked me for the hard work I had put into preparing the event. I expressed my gratitude and then ate in silence, offering nothing more.
“Dancing with Hellion was a very wise choice.”
His Majesty said as he lifted his silverware.
“The South has long interacted with the Regentera ducal house, but the North has not. This occasion could allow the ducal family and the Northern Archduchy to build a friendly relationship. It holds great meaning for you as well.”
“I sincerely hope it turns out that way.”
After answering, I focused once more on my food. The unusually clipped conversation seemed to leave His Majesty slightly flustered.
I had never been one to give him such short replies. I always tried to respond at length and with genuine cheer, even to trivial things, because I wanted to please him and be a comforting presence at his side.
But not today. I was in no mood for it.
“Who do you favor more these days? The choice you made at the ball was performative, of course. I’m curious which of the two you truly have feelings for.”
“I don’t know.”
Once again, my answer was curt.
“Even if there is someone I like, it hardly matters. The position of crown princess is not decided by matters of the heart but by careful political calculation. For that reason, I intend to set my personal feelings aside.”
“I see…”
His Majesty continued to watch me, but I refused to meet his eyes. I felt wretched for deliberately answering so coldly, for behaving so poorly.
“I have always valued that rational side of you. It is an essential quality for a crown princess—and for the empress you will one day become. Yet sometimes… very occasionally… it also fills me with regret.”
“Pardon…?”
“I watched you at the founding festival ball, laughing with your friends. You looked so happy that even I wanted to join you.”
“…”
“As you said, the crown prince must be chosen with political factors in mind. But in the current state of the empire, selecting either archduke would not be strange. Illid is capable in his own right, and so is Hellion. Both are talented and clever young men.”
“…”
“So if it must be one of them, I would prefer the one who could make you happy. Do not overthink it.”
I kept my gaze fixed on my plate, mechanically cutting my food. Or rather, pretending to. If I looked at His Majesty now, I was certain I would burst into tears.
He was a good man. After Primos’s death, he had entrusted me with many of the crown prince’s duties and relied on me in countless ways.
When I considered all of that, I knew I should not speak the words I was holding back. It was something I needed to endure and let pass. But this time, it was unbearably difficult.
“Your Majesty, how has your health been lately?”
I deliberately changed the subject.
“I heard the imperial physician has recently reduced your medication.”
“Yes. The herbal tea agrees with me, so he said it would be fine to lower the dose.”
The imperial physician was an exceedingly strict man. He had also been deeply skeptical of Karina’s herbal tea.
For him to conclude that the medicine could be reduced, Karina’s tea was clearly having a genuine effect on His Majesty.
“Ishtel, do you know why I keep asking which of Illid or Hellion you prefer?”
His Majesty tapped the edge of the table as he spoke.
“I value your discernment. Your intuition for recognizing a person’s true nature and ability is sharper than anyone else’s.”
“My intuition…?”
“Yes. That is why I am curious whether you can see sides of Illid and Hellion that remain hidden from me.”
“I am hardly qualified to evaluate the two archdukes, but as Your Majesty said, both are outstanding men.”
“Indeed? In what ways?”
“Nobles say Archduke Illid is wise and Archduke Hellion is brave, but I find that assessment lacking. Lately I have been discovering new sides of Archduke Hellion. Beneath his exterior, he is thoughtful and possesses judgment equal to Archduke Illid’s.”
“I agree. He has his mother’s impatient temperament, yet he does not act recklessly. Ishtel, you truly understand people well.”
I was about to thank him for the praise when His Majesty continued.
“Just look at Karina.”
Why was her name being brought up now? My expression stiffened before I could stop it. Yet His Majesty continued without pause.
“I heard you took in Karina, who had nowhere else to go, and made her your maid. She is quite capable and clever. I already knew you had a good eye for people, but you have chosen well again with a subordinate.”
I closed my eyes briefly and drank from my glass of cold water.
Praising the other party in order to achieve one’s true objective. This was the same tactic His Majesty was using now that Illid and Hellion had employed during their recent confrontation.
I was not ignorant of his intention. He was warning me not to raise an issue about Karina’s dress. Since I was the one who had taken her in, attacking her now would be the same as tarnishing my own reputation.
“Your Majesty…”
Some time ago, Illid had asked me whether I trusted His Majesty the Emperor. Without the slightest hesitation, I had answered yes.
“Have you nothing to say to me?”
But now I was no longer certain. And if things continued like this, I feared I would grow even less certain in the future.
“…”
His Majesty and I simply stared at each other in silence for a long time.
Both of us knew the words the other was holding back. Yet neither of us spoke them first. Our silence was the sound of deep trust beginning to crumble from its very foundation.
“There is none.”
His Majesty finally broke the heavy silence.
“If you have finished eating, you may leave.”
In the end, His Majesty said nothing to me. I offered him a respectful bow and returned to my room.
I had been ready to let it go if he had told me everything.
That he had invited her to the ball to commend her for saving the person he loved. That since I owned several dresses, he had simply given her one I was not using. I’m sorry.
If he had said that, I would have endured it. Because His Majesty cherished Karina. Because her abilities were of great help to him.
Instead, he had shielded her in front of me. As though nothing had happened at all.
This time it had been the dress, but there was no telling what she would demand from His Majesty next. And he would grant her request again and shield her in front of me once more.
It was my own naivety that had brought this about. To think I had believed her when she said she only needed a job.
Why had I made that choice back then? If I had simply given her a few gold coins and sent her away, none of this would have happened.
She could not have revealed her identity to me without any purpose. There had to be a reason she entered the imperial palace.
Unless I gained the ability to read people’s hearts, I would never know her true intentions. But whatever her goal might be, I possessed the power to stop her. The time had come to settle this matter—within my own limits.
Creak—
I opened the desk drawer and took out the necklace that did not belong to me. In the sunlight streaming through the window, the golden rose emblem gleamed vividly.
Bang— Bang— Bang—
The following day, gunshots rang out without pause across the imperial hunting grounds.
I stared at the red center of the target and pulled the trigger. As another shot echoed, a servant ran forward to check the target and waved the flag indicating a hit.
“You truly are a remarkable marksman.”
While I was reloading, applause reached my ears. When I turned, I saw Illid clapping with his usual gentle smile. Beside him stood Hellion, arms crossed, yawning.
“Why are you both up so early?”
“Well… as you know, our quarters are not far from the hunting grounds…”
“Just say the gunshots woke you. No need to dress it up.”
When Hellion cut in bluntly, Illid gave a slightly sheepish shrug.
“I will not apologize. The shots were fired after the usual hour for rising.”
I raised the loaded gun once more. As I focused on the target, both men fell silent and looked in the same direction.
Bang— Bang— Bang—
All three shots struck true. I set down the smoking firearm and turned around. With the two men present, concentration was impossible.
“Shall the three of us hunt together this afternoon?”
Hellion glanced at my face repeatedly as he spoke.
“I’m free. What about you, cousin?”
“Huh? Oh, I’m free too. What do you say, Duchess?”
“No. I am not.”
I rejected their suggestion outright. Hellion’s eyes began to waver uneasily, while clear panic crossed Illid’s face. Both seemed startled by the cold aura I was radiating, so different from my usual demeanor.
“Also, both of you are forbidden from entering the hunting grounds today. I have reserved the entire area.”
“Yes, of course.”
Illid answered the moment I finished speaking.
“Is something wrong?”
Hellion, unable to endure the tension, asked directly. Illid struck him hard on the back, but Hellion remained standing before me, waiting for an answer.
“I simply wish to hunt alone.”
I gazed toward the imperial palace beyond the hill.
“The prey I let slip away last time keeps bothering me.”