Clash of Opinions
“Changjae, you don’t need to be so tense.”
“But still.”
“I’m telling you it’s fine. Do you really think I’d be able to fight someone if I were left alone?”
“But still.”
It’s different with you, Mom. That person easily took down a wild boar. If he wanted to, what’s to stop him from killing a human? I swallowed those words. He might be listening from the bathroom.
“What about you, Seunghee? Could you risk your life fighting someone if you were left alone?”
Seunghee shook her head vigorously. Of course she couldn’t. The only future I could picture for her was latching onto someone else for protection.
“Changjae, Seunghee, and even me—we were all living perfectly normal lives just a few days ago. A sudden change in environment doesn’t rewrite someone’s fundamental nature. Not everyone can fight just because they’re forced into a situation where they have to.”
“But Mom, Seungpil—”
“That was just bad luck. He ran into someone with a rotten core, that’s all.”
“That’s exactly why I’m asking how you can possibly know someone’s core!”
“I can tell. I’m a mother, and so is she.”
“But…”
I was at a loss for words. This wasn’t the kind of sentimental conversation I wanted to have. It was frustrating. Why was I being so on edge? Everything I did was to protect the two of them.
“You can’t possibly know that for sure. What if something had gone wrong? What if you’d been attacked? Or taken hostage?”
“But nothing happened, so it’s fine, isn’t it?”
“That’s not the point!”
Why did Mom trust people so easily? I had worked so hard to build walls so no one could get inside, yet she just opened the door without hesitation. Why was she turning all my efforts into nothing?
“Hey, calm down, oppa. It’s not like anything major happened…”
“You stay out of this.”
My voice came out sharper than I intended. Seunghee flinched at my unusual tone and stepped back. Mom, however, remained calm.
“Changjae. Did that woman look like she was lying to you?”
“How would I know? I can’t read people’s hearts.”
“I told you before, didn’t I? You can’t let fear of a small chance of failure make you miss a big chance of success.”
I definitely remembered her saying something like that.
“But Mom—”
“I know the situation is difficult. I know we shouldn’t trust people easily here. But that’s exactly why we can’t afford to miss the chance to grab someone who might be able to help us. Just like she needs us to save her child, we might need her to survive.”
Ninety percent chance of success. Ten percent chance of failure. Win 100,000 won on success, lose a million on failure. Would I take that bet? Probably not. Because losing a million won could mean losing our lives.
“For her, the safest way to achieve her goal is to cooperate with us. Cooperating is more effective than betraying us, so there’s no reason for her to betray us. Especially if she’s a mother trying to save her son.”
But Mom had taken the bet anyway. Because those 100,000 won might not be enough for us to survive. I didn’t know whose judgment was right. In the end, things might turn out successfully just like Mom predicted. And yet I was angry. Because she was so willing to gamble with herself—the very person I was desperately trying to protect.
“Ma’am, I—”
I was about to continue when I shut my mouth. The bathroom door had clicked open and the woman stepped out. She looked at us, hesitated for a moment, then suddenly bowed her head.
“I’m sorry!”
Still in that position, she continued.
“If there’s anything I can do to help all of you, I’ll do whatever it takes. Um, that is…”
Her voice was shaky and precarious. It sounded so hoarse I was worried she might start coughing up blood.
“……”
I stayed silent. So did Mom and Seunghee. We exchanged glances. Who’s going to speak? Not me. You say something, Mom. Our eyes held that silent conversation.
In the end, Mom couldn’t stand it anymore and stepped forward as our representative.
“Well… if you’re willing to do anything, how about you start by… taking a shower?”
“Ah… yes. I’m sorry.”
Mom led the woman into the bathroom. …Thank goodness. The woman smelled terrible because she hadn’t washed in a long time. It hadn’t been as noticeable outside, but the moment she entered the hideout, it became obvious. I suppose that’s normal when you’re stranded on a deserted island. She’d been too preoccupied with a crisis, and going days without bathing couldn’t be helped.
I tried to follow the two of them into the bathroom, but Mom shot me a look that clearly said don’t come in. …It’s not like I particularly wanted to follow them anyway. Still. You never know. It could get dangerous. So I decided to wait right outside the bathroom until Mom came out. At least I could hear what was happening from here. If anything went wrong, I could rush in immediately.
Mom’s voice leaked out from inside. Use this to wash, wipe with that, shave with this. She was explaining everything one by one, like a mother teaching her child. It somehow reminded me of my own childhood with Mom.
“……”
Once my emotions had settled, I started to regret arguing with Mom. Actually, it hadn’t even been a real argument. At most, it was just a clash of opinions. But it was clear that feelings had been hurt on all sides—me, Mom, and Seunghee.
“Seunghee.”
Seunghee was throwing the shoes the woman had been wearing into a trash bag. Those smelled pretty bad too.
“…What?”
She sounded sulky.
“Come here.”
When I called her, Seunghee approached with a pout but still obeyed. I grabbed both of her cheeks.
“Eueh?”
“Sorry for speaking so harshly.”
Then I stretched them sideways.
“Eoaueiiyeo?!”
They really stretch well. The moment I let go, Seunghee quickly backed away.
“What the hell are you doing?!”
“I said I’m sorry.”
“Ugh!”
She swung her arms wildly as she charged at me. I gently deflected her. Her anger seemed to have dissipated. What a simple girl.
Just then, Mom finished talking and came out of the bathroom. It looked like nothing had happened after all.
“Mom.”
She seemed to have something to say to me too, but I spoke first.
“I’m sorry. I guess I was a bit too sharp.”
Even if I had complaints, ruining the atmosphere wasn’t good. Especially with Seunghee watching. If she learned from this, she might start talking back to Mom later. For the sake of maintaining discipline among the women, I couldn’t let that happen.
“No, Changjae. I’m the one who’s sorry.”
Mom apologized as well.
“I got ahead of myself… If I had just stayed quiet, you would have handled it yourself. I’m sorry for only increasing the burden and the risk.”
“No. I probably… wouldn’t have been able to do it.”
I most likely would have killed that woman. It would have been the safest option. If she ended up becoming an ally, that would be thanks to Mom.
“No. I shouldn’t have stepped forward. When I heard about her son dying, it didn’t feel like someone else’s problem, so I… I guess my emotions got the better of me.”
As expected, she must have felt a sense of kinship as a fellow mother. It was inevitable that her heart would waver at the sight of a mother wailing over her lost son. That’s exactly the kind of person Mom is, and it’s why I love her so much.
I pulled the teary-eyed Mom into my arms. Her son is still alive, so don’t worry.
“Seriously. You can’t do that again.”
“Okay…”
“Honestly, when that woman hugged you, my heart dropped.”
“I absolutely won’t do it again. I’m sorry, Changjae.”
Mom hugged me tightly in return. Seunghee stood awkwardly beside us.
“Seunghee, you come here too.”
I pulled her in so the three of us could hug together. It would be too pitiful to leave her out.
“…Um.”
“What?”
“…Never mind.”
Seunghee looked strangely embarrassed. Just stay quiet. Don’t ruin the mood.
-Beep beep.
“Ah. Peep, you’re awake?”
It seemed the chick that had been sprawled out sleeping since yesterday had finally woken up. It was perfect timing as an excuse, and Seunghee slipped out of the group hug.
-Peep peep!
The moment Peep woke up, it started bouncing energetically on top of its empty food bowl. I couldn’t tell if this thing was a pig or a chick.
“Want some food? Just wait a second.”
“That thing really only knows how to eat and sleep.”
“It was only born yesterday, you know? All babies are like that.”
“Is that so?”
Even if it grew up and laid three eggs every day, the cost of feed until then would probably be much higher. Maybe it would be better to just eat it and buy eggs separately? By the way, compared to yesterday, it seemed to have grown quite a bit in just one day. Or rather, it had gotten fatter. Its wings and head were the same, but its body had puffed out. If it gained any more weight, its chicken feet might get buried in fat and it’d start rolling around.
“Peep, eat a lot.”
-Peep peep!
Seunghee filled the bowl so full that the feed overflowed. There was clearly more food than the chick’s body could hold.
“Hey, Han Seunghee. Are you really going to give it that much feed?”
“Why not? Peep says even this isn’t enough. Right, Peep?”
-Peep!
“Ugh. You fat chick.”
“Hey! Don’t scold it about eating!”
Mom, who had been watching Peep with a fond smile, suddenly clapped her hands as if she’d remembered something.
“Oh right! I need to make some food! She looked like she hadn’t eaten in days.”
Ah. That’s right. The smell had been so strong I’d forgotten about everything else.
“But what should we give a foreigner?”
“Hmm~ I don’t think a hamburger would work, would it?”
“If she really hasn’t eaten in days, she’ll probably eat anything. Since she’s a foreigner, as long as it’s not spicy, it should be fine, right?”
“Then let’s make chicken soup for lunch today. Something easy to digest even for someone who hasn’t eaten in days.”
“Teach me how to make it too!”
Chicken soup, huh. Perfect—we had just the right chicken for it right here.
I looked down at Peep, who had its head buried in the bowl and was frantically inhaling the feed.
-Peep?
Feeling my gaze, the chick tilted its head in confusion.