Mother's Monologue
The coins from Mom's monologue came in decently enough. The number of categories was about the same as when I'd been with Mother, but the actual amount I received was clearly less. Roughly fifty to seventy percent per entry? Was this the difference between a Main Partner and a Sub-Partner? On top of that, the coins you earned were split fifty-fifty with the partner. That part couldn't be helped. Mother and I shared our coins, but with Seunghee it was separate. If we didn't split them, it would be like the system was paying me and Seunghee twice, which would mean more coins from a Sub-Partner than from the Main one. At that point there'd be no reason to bother with the Main Partner at all.
“But then, on the flip side, there’s no reason to do it with Seunghee either.”
In the end, the coins that actually reached me were only about thirty percent of what I got with Mother. Even from a personal preference standpoint, I enjoyed it more with Mom. If I was going to get fewer coins on top of that, there was no merit in choosing Seunghee over her. I really shouldn’t have taken these two in from the start. Still, once I’d accepted them, kicking them out again wasn’t easy.
“……I guess I’ll just endure it until we bring Seungpil back.”
The coins Seunghee and I received this time came to roughly four hundred each. Since it was the first time, the system had been a bit generous. It would probably drop after this. Even if we worked our asses off, it would still take a solid two or three months to save up enough.
“Three months, huh……”
It was by no means a short period. This was a world where surviving day to day was already difficult. It was hard to believe we could spend several months living peacefully without any crises.
For now, I’d focus solely on reviving Seungpil. Once he was back, I could just hand Seunghee over to him. Even up to that point, I figured I’d done more than enough.
The problem was…… how Seunghee would react.
“Hey. Seunghee. Wake up.”
She had completely passed out. No matter how much I shook her, she showed no sign of waking.
“If you don’t wake up, I’m touching whatever I want, okay?”
“Mmm……”
Using her unconscious state as an excuse, I groped her breasts. Seunghee’s fit perfectly in one hand. They were nice to play with when I had time to kill.
“We still have a lot to talk about.”
I needed to tie up loose ends with Seunghee, clearly. Living together here would only last until we revived Seungpil. She had never wanted to be with him in the first place. Even after he came back, she might refuse to live with him. And judging from how she reacted during sex, there was a chance she might become fixated on me. It wasn’t uncommon for a woman to develop special feelings for the man she lost her virginity to. Especially in an extreme environment like this, living together for months could make even a normal person dependent.
I had to draw the line before that happened. The last thing I needed was her catching romantic feelings.
“Mmm……”
Maybe it tickled. Seunghee grabbed the hand that was kneading her breast. I thought she’d woken up, but it was just sleep-talking. She was still fast asleep, completely oblivious to the world.
“……Let’s save the complicated conversation for tomorrow.”
Staring at that blank, thoughtless face made my own worries about annoying problems feel stupid. Whatever. I decided to sleep next to Seunghee too. It was important to rest whenever you actually could.
In the dark cave where everyone else was asleep, one person quietly opened her eyes alone.
Changjae’s mother—Seollyeong.
“Ah……”
Still half-drunk on sleep, Seollyeong was in a daze. Where was this? It wasn’t the bed she usually slept in. The realization that she had woken up in an unfamiliar place sent anxiety crawling over her.
“Ow.”
Then came the stinging pain. Her lower belly. A strange discomfort between her legs. That was when the memories flooded back—what she had been doing right before she fell asleep.
“Ah……”
Heat began to bloom in her lower abdomen. The image of her son, utterly absorbed in her as a woman, rose in her mind. Embarrassment burned across her face. Even though no one was watching, Seollyeong pulled the blanket over her body to hide.
Before falling asleep, she had become one with her stepson, Changjae. In any normal situation, it was a relationship that could never exist, that must never exist. Yet this abnormal environment had driven mother and son down the path of sin. The mother had taken her son into her arms, and the son had planted his seed inside his mother. Just as the vulgar rumors whispered behind their backs had claimed, the two of them had stepped into forbidden territory.
But Seollyeong didn’t regret it. Not even a little. If anything, she regretted not accepting her son sooner.
‘Mother. I love you not as your son, but as a man.’
About a year ago. Her son, now a grown adult, had pulled her tightly into his arms and said those words. Her son was a man after all. In the strength of those arms, Seollyeong had felt fear toward him for the first time.
‘I’ll make you happy in Father’s place.’
It had been a shock. The realization that her own son saw her as a woman brought a feeling close to betrayal. Seollyeong hadn’t stopped to consider how deeply he must have agonized before saying those words, how seriously he had meant them. She hadn’t thought about how much the rejection would wound him.
She had raised Changjae as her own son. But not everyone around them saw it that way. She wasn’t his biological mother. The age gap was barely ten years. His father was absent. Those factors turned the unusual mother-son pair into natural gossip.
And as young Changjae grew taller and more handsome, the rumors gained ugly, unnecessary details. That the two of them were actually in an immoral relationship.
If she had heard it to her face, Seollyeong would have denied it fiercely. But since it was all whispered behind their backs, denial would only add fuel to the fire.
‘It doesn’t matter if I’m not his real mother, if the age difference is small, or if there’s no father. I will raise Changjae as his mother without a single shred of shame.’
Seollyeong had believed that as long as she was innocent, the rumors didn’t matter. Perhaps that was exactly why her son’s confession had struck her so hard. What if the rumor wasn’t nonsense—what if it became truth? What if everyone found out?
She didn’t care how the world treated her. But she could not bear the thought of her son being looked at that way. Changjae had a bright future ahead of him. Before he could walk the wrong path, his mother had to guide him back to the right one.
‘Snap out of it! I’m your mother, and you’re my son!’
So Seollyeong had pushed him away with all her strength. For the first time, she slapped her son’s cheek and scolded him in a loud voice. That incident left deep scars on both their hearts.
That night, Changjae left home. He drifted between friends’ houses before volunteering for the military. Seollyeong, who had heard nothing from him, only learned he had enlisted long after the fact. A full year passed before the two of them faced each other again.
One year. Seollyeong spent every single day of it drowning in regret. If only she had accepted her son’s heart back then. If only she had spoken to him more calmly. If only she had brought it up again the next day after she had calmed down. Endless regrets surged inside her chest.
To her, her son was everything. The only one who had filled the emptiness in her heart. The year without him had been nothing but hollow, regret-filled days. Seollyeong had waited in their empty house for him to return. She kept the place spotless so it would be ready the moment he came back. She cooked his favorite foods only to throw them away. Worried she might miss him if he came home on sudden leave, she rarely left the house. But not one phone call. Not one letter. Even during vacation season, he never returned.
At this rate, their bond might break forever. That fear piled up heavily in Seollyeong’s heart.
There was no blood between them. Moreover, although she had been entrusted with the role of mother by Changjae’s father, legally they were strangers. The only thing holding their mother-son relationship together was mutual acknowledgment. If Changjae ever decided to sever that tie, the fragile bond would snap instantly.
It terrified her. The fear that her son might never come back began to feel all too real. In the end, knowing she might only be a burden, Seollyeong had gone to his military base without warning. They had managed a dramatic reconciliation in the visitation room, but the anxiety she felt that day still remained rooted deep in her heart.
Somehow they had begun this deserted-island survival together. There had been terrifying moments, but as long as she was with the son she loved, she could endure anything. Yes. No matter what happened, as long as Changjae was by her side, she was confident she could overcome it all.
“……Changjae?”
She called her son’s name carefully. No answer came. The sleeping spot felt cold. Her eyes gradually adjusted to the darkness, and the inside of the cave came into view. The first thing Seollyeong looked for was her beloved son.
“……”
He was there. On the mattress directly across from her. Changjae was fast asleep, arms wrapped around another girl.
“……”
A sting. Something cracked inside her chest. Seollyeong didn’t fully understand what the pain was. She only knew that the tender sight suited them far too well, and for some reason it made her sad.
Unlike her, Seunghee was young and pretty. Seollyeong was thirty. Young to be called a mother, perhaps, but already old to be called a woman. Clearly, Seunghee looked far more fitting next to Changjae than she did—the woman who had lived as his mother until now.
“……”
Another sting. Her heart grew cold. The loneliness reminded her of the year she had spent unable to see him. It had been none other than herself who suggested accepting Seunghee. Changjae had actually tried to drive her away. Accepting Seunghee meant exactly that. To survive here, they needed male-female relationships. And to revive Seunghee’s dead older brother, Changjae had to form that bond with her.
In that case, yielding her place to Seunghee was the mature, adult thing to do. She couldn’t show an ugly side in front of Changjae.
Yes. Her head understood it perfectly. She understood, but……
“……”
Another sting. Seollyeong still didn’t quite know what this swirling emotion in her chest was.