Desire of the Heart
For a martial artist of the Tang Clan, one who relied chiefly on poison and hidden weapons, mastering the heart was more important than anything else.
Whether they were deceiving an opponent's eyes to strike with poison, or loosing concealed weapons with the intent of cutting off a life in a single breath, they had to keep their minds clear, calm, and unwavering if they hoped to remain composed in any situation.
That was why the martial artists of the Tang Clan, whether in the inner halls or the outer courts, invested so much effort in cultivation and discipline.
And yet, so long as one remained human, there would always be moments when perfect calm was impossible.
The young clan leader of the Sichuan Tang Clan.
Dang Gangjin's eyebrow twitched before he could stop it.
"You're already leaving? The clan leader should be arriving soon. Couldn't you stay a little longer?"
At Hong Chilsong's remark that he would leave after lunch, Dang Gangjin hurried to offer words meant to keep him there.
"A trading caravan we deal with recently gifted us a rare liquor called Snow-Flower Jade Dew. The Heavenly Crimson Blood Stalactite Wine you took away not long ago was also something they offered, so I'm sure this one will suit your taste as well."
"Snow-Flower Jade Dew, you say..."
"They say its smoothness is so exquisite that merely holding it in your mouth makes you feel as if it melts away on its own. Come now, we should at least confirm whether that is true."
Even if the sky were to fall, there was no way the law elder of the Beggar Sect would refuse alcohol.
Just as Hong Chilsong's gaze wavered slightly, Dang Gangjin let out a relieved breath and was about to turn away when—
"Sorry. I think I'll have to drink another time."
Hong Chilsong, who had been about to let the lake of his composure settle, had instead hurled a massive boulder into it and sent ripples scattering everywhere.
"...It seems you have somewhere urgent to be."
In truth, there had been no real reason to work so hard to keep Hong Chilsong there.
It was true that he had helped the Tang Clan quite a bit, but in just a few days they had already repaid his kindness far more than enough.
"What sort of business could an old beggar have? I only want to get that child, Cheongwol, together with his intended as soon as possible."
The problem was that the name Cheongwol had just come out of Hong Chilsong's mouth.
"You seem awfully close. I suppose you can't bear to be apart from each other for even a moment."
Dang Gangjin's eyes narrowed slightly.
Even Dang Sohye had been able to tell at once that it was a lie, so Hong Chilsong must have known full well how clumsy his words sounded.
"The two of them are so besotted that one look at the other's face is enough to make them die of happiness. Watching them makes me think I'd long since have given up my beggar's life and married if I'd had any sense at all."
But the more he spoke, the more obvious it became that he was lying. It seemed he had some reason for hurriedly taking Cheongwol away.
Dang Gangjin did not know what that reason was, but at the very least he needed to hold Hong Chilsong there until Dang Hyeongeuk arrived.
He bit his lip, his heart burning with urgency, and was searching for some words to say when a Tang Clan martial artist approached them with a grim, tightened face.
"Young Clan Leader. You need to come out at once."
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇
Under the shade of a tree, where a cool breeze eased the sweat from his skin.
Cheongwol looked up at the blue sky glimpsed between the trembling leaves and let out a thin sigh.
"Haah..."
He had finally thought he had brought his relationship with Seomun Hwi to an end.
Didn't I say it then? Everything I have is yours for the first time. If you permit me, I'll prove it to you right this instant.
Yet as Seomun Hwi pressed his feelings upon him more boldly than before, Cheongwol had once again responded with that maddeningly ambiguous attitude.
Wasn't this happening because he kept leaving room for it?
Feeling the wind brush the crown of his head, Cheongwol slowly closed his eyes.
But how was he planning to prove it?
Seomun Hwi had said he would prove his heart, but in Cheongwol's mind there was no way to do that unless he took something out and showed it.
And yet the unwavering certainty in that gaze did not seem like the look of a man telling lies.
How foolish. Of course he wasn't talking about anything so innocent as proving it with words.
And to think you pretended not to know, when you were once a man yourself.
So the fact that you didn't throw away that lewd book is finally paying off.
At the sudden voices riding the wind, Cheongwol's eyes flew open and he sprang to his feet.
"What—!"
Then the hallucinated voices, which should have grown even noisier at his ears, vanished in an instant like a lie.
Instead, shameful imaginings so indecent he could barely bear them surged into his mind like a flooding tide.
What if, back then, he had sneered at Seomun Hwi and told him to prove it?
What would he be like now?
The large, rough warmth of Seomun Hwi's hand still seemed to linger, and the place around his waist where he had been held throbbed with an unfathomable sensation.
The obscene spring pictures he had once seen in the book Yin-Yang Union Divine Art.
Before he knew it, Seomun Hwi's face had been overlaid upon the figure of the man in those drawings.
Seomun Hwi breathing raggedly.
A woman barely swallowing her moans with a face melting beneath him.
A moment later, the woman's face, too, became someone else's.
As if his breathing had stopped, Cheongwol swallowed hard.
"No! Absolutely not!"
The reason he had kissed Seomun Hwi was only to soothe, even a little, the heart that would otherwise be left alone and stranded.
He had never intended to think such shameless things.
And yet what about when he wore the clothes gifted by the leader of the Jino Trading Company and watched for Seomun Hwi's reaction?
What about when he had taken his hand and, with tears in his eyes, asked him to become engaged to Dang Sohye and forget him?
...
As one uncommon action after another for a man flashed through his mind, Cheongwol dropped his head with a heavy sigh.
Cheongwol the man, and Cheongwol the woman.
It felt as though the two were tangled together within one body.
So how could he possibly know what he truly wanted?
Just as he was about to let out another long sigh, a stranger's voice sounded very close by.
"Worry calls forth a sigh, and a sigh brings trouble. And trouble, in turn, calls back worry. It's only a vicious cycle, so why not break it here?"
Cheongwol gasped and looked up.
An old man with a frame so solid that his very presence seemed unshakable was looking down at him with a kindly face.
He had not sensed the slightest approach, so how could the man be standing right beside him?
Only for a moment did his confusion linger before Cheongwol tilted his head slightly to the side.
The old man's face felt strangely familiar.
"Grandfather..."
"Have you already forgotten me? Now that is a little hurtful."
The old man grinned and shook his head.
"Didn't we share a meal together in a pavilion in the Tang Clan's main hall? Thanks to your friend, that is."
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇
When Yu Baekheon had first set foot in the Tang Clan, he had been unable to hide his disappointment.
The beggar who had been tailing him must surely have informed them that a member of the Tang Clan had been injured.
He had looked forward to seeing how they, people who always had righteousness and grudges at their lips, would react in the face of such obvious evidence.
But instead of the head that should have been the focus of it all, only bowed bodies greeted him.
The clan leader is away on business at the moment, so the young clan leader is acting in his place.
With no head present to drive the response, everyone merely kept themselves bent low.
Yet when he had first entered Sichuan, no report had said the clan leader was absent.
That made him wonder what had forced Dang Hyeongeuk to leave in such haste.
Still, this works out well enough. They say the Tang Clan's young clan leader takes after his father exactly. I should meet him once, if only to sound him out.
As he wandered through the inner halls with that thought in mind, someone he had never expected at all came into Yu Baekheon's sight.
That child...
Those uncommon eyes, missing nothing even in the smallest detail.
That outstanding talent, one that had seized an offhand question and tried to leap straight into the next realm.
If the child had only wanted to achieve something, Yu Baekheon would have taken him as a disciple by any means necessary.
Was he a child of the Tang Clan?
His regret lasted only a moment before he moved his feet as quietly as a shadow.
Even then, the child's expressions kept changing by the instant, and that sight amused Yu Baekheon rather a lot.
Our Baek Yeong used to be just like that too.
Thinking of his departed daughter overlaid upon the child before him, he cleared his throat and spoke.
The child seemed not to recognize Yu Baekheon at first, tilting his head in confusion, but then his eyes widened and he rose from his seat to offer proper respect.
"I'm Cheongwol. It's nice to see you again here."
"Yu Baekheon. I hadn't expected to meet you here either. Do you have some connection to the Tang Clan?"
Cheongwol gave an awkward smile and waved a hand.
"No. I just came in with a friend by lucky chance and I'm staying here for a while."
"Is that so?"
At the answer that Cheongwol had nothing to do with the Tang Clan, Yu Baekheon felt quietly relieved.
If a child this gifted belonged to the Tang Clan, there might come a day when they would meet as enemies.
As for cutting down a child who reminded him so painfully of his daughter Baek Yeong, that was a task even he, who valued the greater cause above all else, would rather avoid.
"By the way, what business had you making such a troubled face?"
Perhaps because it was an unexpected question, Cheongwol rolled his eyes and did not answer right away.
At that, Yu Baekheon gave a slight smile and lifted one corner of his mouth.
"If it's difficult to say, then forget it."
Then he turned away and said quietly, "I don't know what burden is weighing on you, but since we have met again like this, fate has clearly bound us. I would like to help you forget it, if only for a moment. Don't refuse—come with me."