Family
It was still the deep hour before dawn, when the darkness had not yet fully lifted.
A faint light seeped through the window and softly illuminated the room.
In the middle of it all, Cheongwol sat in meditation with his legs folded beneath him. After a long, quiet exhale, he slowly opened his eyes.
"Hoo..."
He turned his head lightly from side to side, loosening the stiffness in his neck, then rose and walked over to the table.
There, stacked across nearly half the tabletop, were a great many letters—every single one, naturally, sent to Cheongwol by Seomun Hwi.
How many times had he already read the same words over and over?
By now he should have been tired of them, and yet Cheongwol still unfolded each letter with the same bright anticipation as the first time.
They held everything from small updates about daily life to news of what was happening across the Central Plains, and not one line in them had been written carelessly. Each word was full of sincerity.
Hwi...
When she thought about it, they had only spent a little over ten days together.
Given Seomun Hwi's position, he could easily have dismissed it as no more than a passing acquaintance and let it go.
And yet he had remembered her. For that alone, Cheongwol felt nothing but gratitude.
There was only one thing that worried her.
Cheongwol lowered her head slightly and looked at the body that had changed so much since then.
What if he finds it unpleasant?
After the man she had been became a woman, even Unhak—who had once been as close as sworn brothers—had kept his distance for a while. Because of that, she could not help fearing Seomun Hwi's reaction.
In truth, it had only been Unhak's embarrassment that kept him from coming near her, but Cheongwol had misunderstood it entirely.
...No, I can't know until I face Hwi myself.
Cheongwol looked at the letters Seomun Hwi had sent and forcibly brushed away the anxiety lodged in one corner of her heart.
Wasn't this the same Seomun Hwi who had faithfully sent letters for the past two years?
He might be momentarily surprised, but surely he would still treat her as a friend, whether she was a man or a woman.
Yes. It's Hwi we're talking about, after all.
Trying to think only optimistic thoughts, she tipped her head back—and then her eyes fell on the mirror So Gayul had brought in and set there.
Pale gold eyes.
Features that had never been especially coarse, now rendered even more delicate.
A chest carrying a weight she could clearly feel.
Thighs that seemed to gather flesh more readily than anywhere else, and slender arms and legs besides.
Staring at the woman reflected in the mirror, meeting her own gaze, Cheongwol heard herself murmur aloud.
"Nothing about this is easy, is it?"
The woman only smiled faintly in silence, as if that were answer enough.
---
When the sun climbed high overhead, Unhak's voice came from outside the door.
"Cheongwol Doryeon."
"Just a moment."
Cheongwol carefully folded the letter she had been reading and set it aside, then picked up the luggage she had prepared the night before and stepped outside.
Unlike his usual smiling self, Unhak looked at her with a complicated expression tangled with many different feelings.
"Did you sleep well last night?"
Though she had tossed and turned several times with excitement, Cheongwol simply smiled and nodded.
"Yes. I only closed my eyes for a bit, and when I opened them again, morning had come."
"I'm glad you slept well."
Then, as Unhak led the way toward the Grand Master’s quarters, Cheongwol followed behind him.
"Time really does pass in the blink of an eye. It feels like only yesterday that Cheongwol Doryeon first came to the Kongdong Sect, and yet it's already time for you to leave."
"...I remember. You used to scold me so much back then."
"Pardon? No, now you're inventing things that never happened."
Unhak wore a wronged expression and flustered himself, while Cheongwol snickered with laughter.
"You used to glare at me like this, remember? 'Cheongwol Doryeon, do you even know what you're saying right now?'"
Apparently amused by Cheongwol imitating him with such a solemn face, Unhak finally couldn't hold back either and burst into laughter.
"I did, didn't I? But surely Cheongwol Doryeon understands now how bewildered I was back then."
"Of course. If I had been in your place, Doryeon Unhak, I would have thought, 'What in the world is wrong with this madman?'"
"Exactly."
At Cheongwol's blunt agreement, Unhak laughed again.
They went on laughing for quite some time before the two of them realized they had already arrived in front of the hall where the Grand Master resided.
"Cheongwol Doryeon, take this."
Unhak reached into his robes, took out a small pouch, and handed it to Cheongwol.
"What is it?"
When Cheongwol loosened the cord and looked inside, a surge of emotion suddenly welled up in her chest.
The pouch was full of silver coins worn smooth by frequent handling.
"...Doryeon Unhak."
"It's not much, but it's better than having nothing at all."
Not much?
Cheongwol, who had spent the past two years at Unhak's side, knew at once that this was no small sum. A purse like this was practically his entire fortune.
So she bit back the tears stinging at the corners of her eyes and held the pouch back out to him.
"...I can't accept this."
"Why can't you accept it?"
"Because this is...!"
Cheongwol lifted her head to protest, but Unhak only kept smiling with that same kind, easy expression.
"I'm sure it's the same with other sects, but at Kongdong, when a younger disciple sets out on his first journey through the jianghu, it is the senior brother who sees him off properly. Didn't I always say you were just like the youngest disciple in the sect?"
"..."
Now that Cheongwol was looking nearly ready to cry, Unhak stepped closer and gave her shoulder a light, reassuring pat.
"So this is only natural. I don't know what you'll be doing from here on, Cheongwol Doryeon, but never forget that both I and the Grand Master are always on your side."
Cheongwol kept her head bowed in silence for a long while before finally forcing out a reply.
"...Thank you. Senior Brother."
Only on the day she was leaving did she call him Senior Brother, and Unhak grinned at that.
"Your seniority is all tangled up now."
---
As Cheongwol approached with red-rimmed eyes, So Gayul gave her a knowing look.
"Now that you're really leaving, do you feel reluctant? You ought to have stayed here instead of wandering off."
"...If I stay any longer, Grand Master, it will only put you in a difficult position."
At Cheongwol's words, the faces of those detestable elders flashed through So Gayul's mind, and her expression twisted of its own accord.
"So you knew?"
"I caught bits and pieces here and there."
"You've only seen the shameful spectacle of those old fools, then."
So Gayul clicked her tongue, furrowing her brow.
She had taken such care to keep Cheongwol out of sight.
And yet, somehow, the elders had kept showing up day after day to interrogate her, demanding to know whether it was true that an outsider had learned Kongdong's martial arts.
Of course, Cheongwol had not learned Kongdong's techniques but So Gayul's private arts, so there would have been no real problem—but even so, the elders had clearly sensed Cheongwol's potential and meant to keep her trapped within the sect.
All without realizing that Cheongwol might well be the spark that could consume the entire Kongdong Sect.
"...Master?"
So Gayul, lost in thought, only snapped back to herself when Cheongwol's voice reached her at last.
"Forgive me. Just thinking of those greedy old men got me worked up. Well then—do you already have a destination in mind?"
At her question, Cheongwol gave an awkward smile and shook her head.
"I've been wondering where I should go, actually."
"I thought as much. Then take this."
So Gayul smirked and took a small box from within her robes, handing it to Cheongwol.
It was the very same box Cheongwol had once offered her, saying it had been her grandfather's keepsake.
"Why are you giving this to me?"
"You said all he left behind for me was a letter, didn't you? The thing inside belongs to you."
"To me?"
Cheongwol opened the box with great care, and there lay the flower-shaped jade ornament she had seen before, clear and green as spring water.
She tilted her head, staring at it, and So Gayul slowly closed her eyes.
"...It seems it was your mother's."
After those words, the two of them said nothing for a long moment.
Cheongwol stood frozen in place, as if she had turned to stone.
"My mother's... belonging?"
"That is what was written in the letter she left behind. It also said to give it to you on the day you departed for the Central Plains."
It was something left behind by parents she had never once seen in life, and therefore missed with such aching intensity.
Cheongwol could not find a single word to say.
What could she possibly say?
She could only stare at the jade ornament shining with its beautiful light, the pain in her chest growing so sharp it felt as though it might tear her apart.
Seeing how deeply it hurt her, So Gayul placed a cautious hand on the box.
"I don't know what sort of people your parents were, because nothing about them was written down. But as far as I know, there are very few people in the Central Plains capable of craftsmanship like this."
Forcing back the tremor in her voice, Cheongwol asked about them.
"What... kind of people were they?"
"First, go to the Tang Clan in Sichuan. Even if they didn't make it themselves, they'll be able to tell you whose hands worked on it."
"The Sichuan Tang Clan..."
Cheongwol nodded slowly, closed the box, and tucked it into her robes.
"Yes. I'll do that."
---
Once Cheongwol had calmed down somewhat, So Gayul realized that the time for parting had truly come.
"Remember this well. Unless it is a matter of life and death, you must not reveal the Sunflower Manual before others."
"Yes."
"And don't reveal your surname either. Before you speak of the Im family, think twice—no, three times over. Do you understand?"
"Yes."
"Also..."
Repeating the same warnings she had already given countless times, So Gayul firmly reminded Cheongwol of what to beware of in the Central Plains.
A little later, when So Gayul had finished speaking, Cheongwol turned and faced her directly.
"...You little brat. You're really going to leave this old master behind and go, aren't you?"
"If I can, I'll return here as quickly as possible."
To So Gayul, who was looking at her with eyes full of concern.
To her master, and now to someone who was little different from family.
Cheongwol bowed deeply, offering her sincere thanks.
"Master, this unworthy disciple Cheongwol takes leave of you before departing. The teachings and kindness you have shown me until now—I will carve them into my heart and never forget them for as long as I live. I will surely accomplish what I set out to do and return again, so until that day, I pray your body remain well and unharmed."