The Danger of Belly Fat
“Why are the others sprinting ahead without looking back? Someone should pick that up.”
Ho-yeong clicked his tongue. The other soldiers were already far ahead.
“No helping it. The rest of the mounts, return as you are!”
The hobgoblins had found the collapsed Shrakhim and his horse and were racing toward them. At this rate, Shrakhim would be their meal before long.
I mean, that useless bastard. Should I just let him become eagle-pig feed? He was already obnoxious enough. A complete pain in the ass, and now he’s smeared my name all over the capital after harassing the territory people. Fine. I’m not killing him on purpose. He’d just be dying from his own stupidity, right? An accident is an accident. Still... it does leave a bad taste in the mouth. That mangy mutt!
Ho-yeong entered into an internal struggle.
Too late to send the mandragorani for a rescue mission.
After some thought, Ho-yeong decided to save Shrakhim. Not because he pitied the man, of course.
If I save him, I might be able to bring the dispatch guard onto my side, and I could even make that Baron Kihara guy owe me one.
Having made up his mind, he turned toward the Bakgyeokpo.
“Damn it. So I have to do this again.”
“Where are you going, my lord?”
Lilian stepped in front of him.
“Huh? No, I was just...”
“You are not planning to climb into that barrel again and make yourself into a cannonball, are you?”
“Now hold on, ‘barrel’ is a bit much! Your words are rather harsh, aren’t they?”
Ho-yeong, struck right where it hurt, tried to bluff his way through it, but Lilian’s aura was unyielding.
“You promised you would never do anything like that again.”
“I did?”
“Yes.”
“When?”
“On October 7th in the year 724 of the kingdom, at approximately 3:32 p.m.”
That is correct.
At Daliha’s confirmation, Ho-yeong let out a sigh.
“Fine, I get it. But there’s no other way, is there? No way to get over there in one shot. Of course, you may object to me saving that bastard, but—”
“I agree with rescuing Shrakhim.”
“Eh? Lilian, don’t you hate that man with a passion?”
“I despise him.”
“Then why? Did you suddenly start liking him or something?!”
“I believe I may soon come to despise my lord as well.”
Lilian’s lips were clamped shut, and they trembled with barely contained fury.
“No, you said it yourself. Shrakhim should be tried under military law for abetting and encouraging Ullakhim’s desertion, didn’t you?!”
“There is no clause in military law that punishes the dead. Therefore, Shrakhim must be kept alive. If he is to be punished, then he must remain alive until he can receive that punishment.”
At the sharpness in Lilian’s gaze, Ho-yeong flinched.
“You’ve got a point there. Still, listen. We keep circling the same thing. If we’re going to save that guy, we need to get over there first.”
“I will assist you!”
Then Pierre stepped forward.
“Oh! Pierre. Right, you said the House of Marquis Kaysica specializes in spatial magic.”
“Indeed. I may be a foolish magician who falls far short of the family’s renown, but I would dearly like to be of help!”
“Then I’ll leave it to you. Bring over the remaining mana clay!”
As expected of a scion of a prestigious house, Pierre quickly drew a magic circle.
“So this is the mana clay. How convenient.”
Even though it was his first time using it, he handled the mana clay with ease.
“Since you’re helping, may I ask for one more favor? Could you move the dispatch guards toward Kihara Territory later?”
“If that is what the Byeonbangbaek desires, of course.”
“Ah, sorry, one more thing. Could you perhaps use illusion magic? Our magic troops are currently drained of mana....”
“Illusion magic? Yes, I can manage it. But what would you need it for?”
“To put it simply...”
After quickly explaining the plan to Pierre, Ho-yeong stood atop the magic circle.
“Lilian. I said it before, didn’t I? The time would come when spears and beaks would face one another. That moment has come sooner than expected, but will you come with me?”
Lilian stepped forward without the slightest hesitation.
“I shall summon my courage.”
* * *
“Hngh... Damn it, those bastards just left me behind!”
Shrakhim dragged his broken leg along the ground. The way he moved, leaning on the invisible cliff wall for support, was desperate in the extreme.
He glanced at his fallen horse, then forced his mind to work.
They said hobgoblins love horse meat. I’ll throw the horse at them as bait and get as far away as I can.
For him, it was the greatest brainwork of his life.
That Byeonbangbaek bastard... doesn’t look like he plans to help me.
It was too far away to see clearly, but the dots had stopped in one place, so it didn’t look as though anyone was riding to his rescue.
Well, of course. If I were him, I wouldn’t have come for me either. I’ve been a real bastard, and I treated these backwater yokels like dirt. Damn it. If I’d known this would happen...
He thought back on what he had done and tried to repent, but it was already too late.
What if that Tamer fellow saved me for the sake of my uncle? He’d get to make a show of it, and I’d keep my life. That would’ve worked out for both of us... no, no. I can’t even count on that now. I sent Ullakhim to stab him in the back. Damn it!
He had, in effect, cut off his own road to survival.
Even if he really did try to save me against all odds, that woman Lilian would stop him. She had been itching to put me in the ground anyway, so she’d probably think this was a fine excuse.
He had no choice but to give up on rescue and find some way to survive on his own.
While the hobgoblins are distracted by the horse meat, I just need to work my way around this cliff and hide my body somehow.
Shrakhim’s plan was not bad. No, it could even be called excellent.
Given the atrocious condition of his body and the fact that his mind had never been particularly brilliant to begin with, it was the best option available.
“Grrrgh.”
But with the strength he had neglected to train, even dragging his own heavy body forward was a struggle.
- Thud, thud.
And even that was cut short by the tremor in the earth, the vibration caused by the hobgoblins racing closer.
Ugh. This isn’t going to work.
With conditions refusing to cooperate, Shrakhim decided to change plans.
There was supposed to be some kind of invisibility magic circle here.
He began groping desperately along the transparent cliff wall.
The mana-clay magic circle had been thrown together in a hurry, so it hadn’t managed to wrap perfectly around the cliff. In some places, the stone jutted out beyond the boundary; in others, there were gaps of bare ground.
“Please... please!”
What he sought so desperately was a space his body could squeeze into.
But it was not easy to find a gap large enough to conceal that fat frame of his.
- Hogrie!
The hobgoblins were already right on top of him.
Shrakhim’s eyes bulged, but that still did not let him see the transparent cliff wall.
Holy Hariad. Please! If you will just provide a place for this one body to lie down, I swear I’ll repent and devote myself to the temple for the rest of my life... though I can’t get married, so I’ll just do a great deal of service instead!
Shrakhim lived close to the temple, but his prayers had always been far away. The only time he ever went there was to buy wine and cheese.
But this prayer came from the bottom of his heart.
I’ve got it, I’ve got it!
Had his desperate sincerity reached the saintess? At last, he found a fairly wide gap.
“Grrrngh!”
With a strange groan, Shrakhim pressed himself tight against the stone wall.
He yanked at the leg he could no longer bend because it had broken.
If I can just manage this much...
Right then, the hobgoblins appeared.
- Hogrieek!
Upon discovering the fallen white horse, they swarmed over it, trampling its broken leg and driving their beaks brutally into its head again and again.
Hh... eek.
All Shrakhim could do was hope they would finish eating quickly so they would go after the other horses again.
- Hogrie, hogrie!
But to his misfortune, the hobgoblins who had gathered seemed to be more like gourmets. They pecked and nibbled at the meat, savoring it as though each bite were precious.
Just hurry up and eat it already, you bastards.
The horse he had survived and suffered with was not something he pitied, exactly, but imagining those beaks coming for his own body left him no time to pray for the horse’s soul.
Then, just as the late-arriving ones were also preparing to sample the horse meat as sashimi...
- Hogrie?!
Something happened that made the diving beaks jerk upward.
- Hihihihing!
Not far away, ten white horses were grazing idly.
- Hogriek!
With fresh prey suddenly in sight, the hobgoblins became even greedier and charged off at once. The white horses saw them and began to flee.
Of course, these were not living horses but illusions. Ho-yeong had asked Pierre to create them in order to pull the hobgoblins away from Shrakhim and lead them into another trap.
I-I don’t know what just happened, but thank goodness.
Lying there at the angle of a side plank, Shrakhim couldn’t actually see the illusion.
Even so, the hobgoblins had run off, and that was cause for celebration.
- Hogrie, hogrie. Grrrgh.
“You idiot! Go away! You too, get lost!”
But even then, one of them remained behind.
Apparently this one preferred to stuff itself with what it had already caught rather than chase after some fresh meal it might not even be able to catch.
Why aren’t you leaving, you bastard?!
Seeing a hobgoblin so lacking in forward-looking ambition, Shrakhim seethed inwardly.
- Hogrie...?!
Then the present-oriented hobgoblin lifted its head.
- Hogrieee?
Blood smell. Different. Not horse. Rides horse. Species. Saw earlier. Not visible now.
With its keen nose and, for a hobgoblin, rather sharp mind, the creature quickly deduced that the new scent of blood was human.
- Hogrie?
But when it looked around, it could not see a single human in sight.
- Hogrgh....
Deciding, in accordance with its philosophy of living in the moment, to finish the remaining horse meat, it lowered its head again.
“Huff!”
Shrakhim exhaled the breath he had been holding.
- Hogrie?!
The hobgoblin saw it. Something had suddenly emerged from the transparent air. Shrakhim’s protruding belly.
Ghk!
Even Shrakhim could see the gut that had slipped out of the invisibility field. He sucked in his breath again and tried to draw it back in, but it was already too late.
- Hogrgh!
The hobgoblin was already closing in. It jabbed at the air with its beak.
Please... please back off.
The sound birds make when pecking is usually described as “peck, peck.”
The huge beak of the hobgoblin made rather different noises.
- Bang, bang.
The first was the sound of it striking the stone wall.
- Crack.
The second was the sound of a shinbone punching through flesh and jutting out.
“Kweeiiik!”
It sounded like a pig being throat-cut, but it was Shrakhim’s scream.
- Hogrie!
Having located its prey through the beak strikes and shrieks, the hobgoblin grabbed the easiest part to bite, dragging Shrakhim’s leg out into the open.
“Ghh... aaaaah!”
Having left his sword and spear behind, Shrakhim swung the only weapons he had left and fought back. But fists without aura were useless against the thick feathers and leather hide.
- Hogrie?
The hobgoblin tilted its head, puzzled that the human it was about to eat was patting it instead.
It pinned Shrakhim’s leg with one hind leg like a boar and clamped his arm hard with its eagle forelimb.
“N-no. No! I can’t die like this when I haven’t even gotten married—”
The hobgoblin raised its head high for the finishing blow.
- Kiyaaaaaaah!
It was a scream similar to Shrakhim’s, but not quite the same.
- Hrrghhh!
The hobgoblin, with its sensitive hearing, recoiled in ear-splitting pain.
“What the—?”
The owner of that scream was Mandragorani.
“You think you can get married if you don’t die here? It’ll be faster for a goblin archmage to appear than for a woman willing to marry you.”
Against the afternoon sun, the Byeonbangbaek appeared.