Chapter 5
Chapter 5
The intro, which surely every citizen in the country would recognize, slid past, and a bubbly vocal hit my ears.
I took the iconic starting pose I had memorized.
One of the judges spat out the water they were drinking.
—Ah, me too! I like you, too~
This heart-pounding feeling! It’s like popcorn!
POP! POP!
The popping beat is ringing out~
This feeling overflowing in my heart!
Chop, chop, chop. Only Young-rin, who had requested the dance, nodded seriously at my simple footwork. It seemed she was the only professional here.
Soon came the part that half the people my age could probably dance to.
—POP! POP!
You’re my Popcorn~ (Oh Yeah!)
You CON CON CON CON
Control my heart~
The chorus of Malang Dalkom’s "POP☆CON," released ten years ago, pounded vigorously against my eardrums.
Known as a "forbidden CSAT song," it was the main culprit behind many examinees failing their listening tests that year due to its absurd lyrics and insane addictiveness.
For the record, I took the CSAT that year, too. I didn't have the money to retake it, though.
—POP POP!
Popping Popcorn~ (Ooh~)
It was also famous for the sheer number of people who uploaded dance covers, as the difficulty level was quite low.
To put it more bluntly, it was at a level where even a lower-grade elementary schooler could do it with a bit of practice.
If I had brought this out during its peak ten years ago, I would have been torn to shreds. But now, I figured I could pass it off as a gag wrapped in a nostalgia filter, so I chose it.
Of course, I was dancing my heart out with a dead-serious face.
Even if it was for a laugh, it would be off-putting if I, a contestant, started snickering and acting like it was a joke. I had to give the impression that I had prepared as hard as I could within my capabilities.
And honestly, I had worked hard. I even leveled up while practicing this. I had achieved the "First Movement" and "10 Movements" achievements.
Looking at the judges who were clapping and roaring with laughter, I felt like I might have made a slight mistake... but whatever. They’ll figure out how to grade it.
I stopped dancing after the final move of the first verse.
As I caught my breath and gave a deep bow, applause broke out from judges who seemed to have finally regained their composure.
"Thank you."
Young-rin grabbed her mic first, but the choreographer beat her to the punch.
His eyes were bloodshot from laughing so hard. It looked like he’d actually shed tears.
"Wow, damn... I never dreamed that song would come out. Weren't you ten years old when 'Popcorn' was released, Moon-dae? Did you prepare that for a talent show back then or something?"
"It wasn't that, but I'm a fan of Malang Dalkom-sunbaenim, so I prepared it."
"Pwahaha!"
For context, Malang Dalkom’s most recent album was released four years ago.
Their prime was so far gone that a twenty-year-old claiming to be a fan seemed eccentric. It was at a level where it wouldn't even cause a scandal if they were an idol of the opposite sex.
Sure enough, the choreographer burst into laughter again.
Beside him, Mudie murmured with a pleased expression.
"Aw... he's cute~"
"He worked hard. At the very least, he worked hard!"
The male idol judge chimed in. The suspicion that had clouded his face when I said I had no experience was completely gone.
Only then did Young-rin finally speak.
"That doesn't mean you were good, though."
I knew it.
This was the kind of situation where the edit would use a close-up and sound effects. I could practically see that line appearing in a giant red caption: BAM!
I roughly anticipated the editing angle and waited for the rest of her critique.
"First of all, your lack of experience shows when you move your body. Even if you get a good evaluation now because of the atmosphere, the upcoming missions will be overwhelming for you."
"I am prepared for that."
Well, my status window is, anyway.
Regardless of my unspoken thoughts, Young-rin nodded heavily.
"I see."
Then, her expression softened as she added, "...Anyway, I can see the effort you put in. Good job."
"Thank you."
I felt like I’d said "Thank you" about ten times today. I wondered if it would continue at this frequency.
As I was gauging that, the judges were exchanging opinions without using their mics so I couldn't hear.
This is where another cruel element of this show comes in.
Here, they rank you from 1st to 77th even in the first evaluation. Then, they assign seats according to that rank.
And they do it immediately, using the temporary rankings that come out right after the evaluation.
If a later contestant does better while the seats are full, the rankings shift, and someone has to vacate their spot.
The show’s trademark was filming contestants in the lower ranks getting pushed down one by one until they ended up in last place, crying.
Fortunately, it didn't look like I’d end up in that state.
My rank... maybe around 24th?
"Park Moon-dae... your rank is... 17th!"
If they overvalued me at around 5th place just to film a scene of me getting pushed down later, it meant my actual rank was close to my prediction.
I think I went up about four or five spots thanks to the atmosphere.
Once time passed and the judges' rose-tinted glasses came off, I might have to busily vacate my seat for the middle and high schoolers.
It was a bit funny to be bowing my head so diligently while thinking such cynical thoughts.
"Thank you."
"I'm going to train you hard, so raise your rank next time," the choreographer said with a smirk. He’d probably turn on me instantly if my skills didn't improve, but I had the status window.
It would be nice if I could pull off a scene that moves that choreographer.
I bowed once more and headed toward the set where the seats were arranged.
The higher the rank on the seat, the larger, more luxurious, and more cushioned it became. The difference was so blatant it felt almost vulgar.
The 17th-place seat I was to sit in was a leather chair that looked like something a corporate executive would use.
As I sat down, a contestant sitting two seats away at 15th place greeted me. He had a friendly impression and looked to be around Moon-dae's age.
"Hello~"
"Hello."
"You were so good at singing!"
"Thank you. I'm sure you were great as well."
"Huh? Ahaha!"
I hadn't actually seen him, so I couldn't be sure, but I meant that he must be good given his rank. It seemed to have landed well.
The contestant laughed out loud and pointed to the name tag on his chest.
"My name is Lee Se-jin!"
"...!"
I almost let out a groan. I replied with the most poker-faced expression I could muster.
"I'm Park Moon-dae. Nice to meet you."
"Nice to meet you, too~"
After naturally ending the conversation, I looked forward just as the next contestant entered. However, I was dwelling on the name I had just heard.
Lee Se-jin.
It was a name that had debuted through this program. In other words, he was a "guaranteed success" connection.
But there was a problem.
This guy gets caught in a drug scandal next year after this is over. Distribution, no less.
I clearly remembered seeing that name on the 9 o'clock news at a soup restaurant near my studio apartment.
['Idol Inc.' Alumnus Lee Se-jin Arrested on Charges of Drug Distribution.]
...Let's not talk to him from now on.
Timing is everything when cutting ties. Now, let's use this break to check the status window.
*
[Name: Park Moon-dae (Ryu Gun-woo)]
Level: 5
Title: None
Vocal: A-
Dance: D
Appearance: C+
Star Quality: C
Trait: Infinite Potential
!Status Effect: Death if Not Debut
Remaining Points: 1
*
First of all, it seemed I leveled up from the stage just now, as I had a point. It was likely thanks to clearing the "First Stage" achievement.
Also, the Dance and Star Quality categories seemed to have been generated by the recent performance. They were inactive during practice; do they only appear once officially recognized? I wasn't sure of the exact criteria.
Anyway, I had sensed it vaguely while practicing, but... even if my Star Quality was decent, it seemed "Park Moon-dae" really had no talent for dancing.
If Dance was a D, it was probably just at the level of an average person.
I’d probably have to invest points into Dance two or three more times to even stand a chance.
On the other hand, the Appearance category showed a new possibility for the status window. Even though I hadn't invested points, the evaluation went up because I had put effort into my actual appearance.
It meant I could raise my stats myself, separate from the level-up effects of the status window. That was a fairly positive factor.
Finally, another peculiar pop-up was floating small, right next to the status window.
[Successful Stage!]
You have impressed the majority!
: Draw General Trait ☜ Click!
Something strange appeared again.
Still, seeing words like "Successful" and "Impressed," it strongly suggested a reward.
Pretending to fix my hair, I clicked the draw. A rather interesting image appeared.
It was a picture of a gray slot machine. The slots next to the already-pulled lever were spinning rapidly.
The speed gradually slowed down. Soon, I could catch glimpses of the contents of the slots.
A few slots were bronze, but most were gray.
[Strong Heart]
[Humiliation Eraser]
[Crocodile Tears]
[Sleep is for the Dead]
[Look at Me!]
[...]
"..."
Well, it was good that I could guess what kind of traits they were just by looking at them... but weren't the names a bit too crude?
I watched the slot machine with cooled expectations. Anyway, it looked like it was about to stop.
Thud... thud... thud!
Confetti burst from the slot machine. The slot it stopped on was bronze.
[Trait: 'Sleep is for the Dead (D)' Acquired!]
When active, you do not feel fatigued even without sleep.
Experience acceleration bonus +30% from 00:01 to 04:00.
Lasts for one week, single-use.
"...!"
I had landed a trait that seemed surprisingly useful. The name was... well, yeah.
Anyway, it really was a "draw" in every sense of the word. To think it even included the essential element of a "luck-based game." Interesting.
I confirmed that "Sleep is for the Dead (Inactive)" had been added to the Trait section at the bottom of my status window. I’d have to think about when using it would be most effective.
"Contestant Kang Min-jo is... 56th!"
The evaluations were proceeding rapidly.
So far, no other debut members had appeared besides the drug suspect next to me.
I watched as the next contestant entered.
A lanky figure with long limbs walked onto the stage. Seeing as he was alone, he was a contestant with no particular connection to other trainees.
A murmur spread among the contestants in the ranking seats. Of course, it wasn't because he had come up alone.
"Whoa!"
"No way."
It was because the contestant who entered was exceptionally handsome. I could even hear the judges below exclaiming openly.
"He looks like a flower deer~"
Even in my eyes, his appearance was at a level where he wouldn't have to worry about debuting. He was the type who didn't even need to be on a survival show. Surely he must have done something after this program.
But looking at the name tag on his chest, it was a name I didn't know.
[Seon A-hyun]
To think he couldn't debut even with that face—he must be incredibly untalented. He was more handsome than most active idols whose fancam data I had sold.
Hmm, if I were to translate it into the status window... all his stats except Appearance would probably be between F and D.
If I could see other people's status windows, I’d know for sure.
Surprisingly, as soon as I had that thought, a window really did pop up next to the contestant.
"...!"
I could see others' too?
*
[Name: Seon A-hyun]
Vocal: B- (A)
Dance: A (EX)
Appearance: A+ (S+)
Star Quality: B (A+)
Trait: Perseverance (Inactive)
!Status Effect: Lack of Self-Esteem
*
It was a brilliant status window. To the point where I thought he’d easily make it into the top 10 in this evaluation. Were the values in parentheses his maximum potential? If so, his future was bright.
But the very last item caught my eye.
[!Status Effect: Lack of Self-Esteem]
With that face? I would have understood if it said "Arrogance" instead.
Anyway, being able to check others was a huge advantage. If push came to shove, I wouldn't starve to death just by clinging to an entertainment company.
As I was examining the items with interest, I heard the MC's voice.
"Yes, contestant, please introduce yourself!"
Seon A-hyun picked up the microphone. The hand holding it was trembling violently.
"H-h-hello..."
"...!"
It wasn't a mistake from being nervous. His speech was awkward enough to feel jarring. It was a clear symptom of a stuttering disorder.
Moreover, I could feel that he was extremely conscious of his speech impediment. The anxiety and shame were palpable enough to be burdensome.
So that's why. I immediately understood Seon A-hyun's status window.
Still, with this level of appearance and skill, he could have turned the stuttering into a narrative. Why didn't he debut?
Was the "Lack of Self-Esteem" status effect the problem? If I could know more details...
[Lack of Self-Esteem]
: Despises oneself.
All stats decreased by two levels.
"...!"
Another pop-up appeared suddenly. To think I could check the details just by thinking about it.
How very useful.
I should check my own status effect again later to see my remaining lifespan.
I was being sarcastic, but I was actually a bit surprised that the content of that status effect was more intense than I thought. If a debuff like this were applied in a game, I’d just quit. Since this was a game of life and he couldn't reset, he must be quite frustrated too.
"A-hyun, is it... difficult for you to speak?"
"I... I, I... h-had an accident when I was young..."
"Ah..."
The sob story was starting on stage.
To be precise, Seon A-hyun seemed to be trying to explain his condition, while the production crew seemed to be trying their best to turn it into a sob story.
Contrived reactions also erupted from the contestants around me.
In particular, the guy nodding with a tearful, pitying expression was definitely going to be used as a reaction shot. He was even saying lines like this:
"Oh no..."
Reactions to such sensitive topics shouldn't be approached like that. If the editing slipped even an inch, people would say "that kind of reaction is also violence."
I just stared forward with an "I see" expression, without much agitation.
The judges said a few predictable words of encouragement and then carefully requested the performance.
"Then A-hyun, can we see your stage?"
"Y-yes..."
The following stage wasn't that bad. It was just at a level that could be viewed positively overall.
In other words, if the status window was correct, he had botched it compared to his actual skills.
"Seon A-hyun is 18th!"
This is what happens when you lack mental strength and strategy. To be ranked lower than me with that status window.
Regardless, whether they felt his skills were decent or they just didn't want to say anything harsh, the reviews were good.
"You did well~"
"I'll look forward to your future."
The judges threw out various warm remarks. Someone even gave a thumbs-up.
However, Seon A-hyun's face was dark as he bowed deeply.
He walked off the stage, struggling to keep his expression neutral, and came up to the seat next to mine following the MC's guidance.
"..."
I felt like I should say hello...
Seon A-hyun glanced at my seat but didn't speak.
I shouldn't let it look like I was ignoring him. But opening my mouth was a hassle. So, I just gave a small nod toward him.
Seon A-hyun looked startled and nodded back repeatedly.
"The next contestants to be evaluated are five people! Choi Jin-soo, Hong Sung..."
I counted the number of remaining contestants in my head and let out a faint sigh.
There’s still a long way to go.