Chapter 390
Chapter 390
If all the elements and keywords overlap, it’s only natural for a performance to head toward a similar outcome.
Perhaps it was inevitable, given that Seon A-hyun was in charge of the choreography and I had taken on the role of leader.
This performance was gradually being completed in a way that was strikingly similar to the first team match in 〈Idol Inc.〉.
"Great work, everyone."
"Hyung, over here!"
"Thanks."
I wiped the sweat dripping from my chin with a towel.
"Hyung, I think this kind of dance-focused choreography really suits you! You're incredibly fast, and the quality is already amazing..."
"Is that so? I just got lucky."
Because I already knew it.
I didn't even need to personally internalize the revised version of the chorus choreography we were currently practicing. It was almost identical.
That wasn't all.
A similar phenomenon was occurring in the arrangement as well.
...I didn't expect to prove just how good of a choice that was in this way.
By having a professional choose the same options I had made back during that first team match.
Since we had to complete this 'Art' collaboration in just one week, far more in-house experts were attached to the project than before to ensure the stage's quality.
And this was the feedback I received just before the mid-term evaluation.
"In my opinion, how about we bring out the bridge a bit more...?"
"...Yes."
"Since the other two did a lot of the dance parts, let's handle this as a collaboration style. You, solo."
My solo.
It was exactly what I had done in 〈Idol Inc.〉. I had arranged it in a high register specifically to appeal to my vocal stats.
It was essentially a declaration that the arrangement would be nearly identical.
"What do you think?"
"I'm totally for it...!"
But no one objected.
"......."
I relaxed my hands and opened my mouth.
"Yes, I understand."
However, the arranger tapped his shoulder with a somewhat dissatisfied expression and blurted out.
"Gun-woo, are you sick or something? The kid is completely listless."
"...!"
That won't do.
Looking drained in a survival show is a landmine that can lead to an 'attitude controversy.'
Coming clean voluntarily is the best policy.
I immediately raised my voice.
"No! I had a bit of a cold... I'm sorry if my poor condition was showing."
"No, there's nothing to be sorry about... You have to take care of your body. Your debut is right around the corner. You know that, right?"
"Yes."
Instead, the guys on either side of me started chattering.
"Sorry, Hyung. I didn't know you were feeling sick..."
"Please, have some water."
"It's fine. I'm the one who didn't say anything."
I moved past the situation while taking water from Ju-dan. The arranger asked again.
"Then we're going with the bridge like that? The one that emphasizes Gun-woo's vocals."
"Yes."
Resistance is forbidden. From now on, I have to appear even more dedicated on camera to ensure there are no variables.
This is the right way.
But this useless sense of rejection was the problem. That unpleasant feeling where my skills weren't properly coming out during practice.
Damn it.
"Let's get some good rest and start again tomorrow..."
"If we work harder now, the rest tonight will taste even sweeter."
"......Yes, sir."
I restrained my teammates' crazy idea of 'doing it thick and hard to finish early and rest'—even though they were worried about my condition—and finished that afternoon's practice.
I couldn't help but sigh.
Am I out of my mind?
If my skills are at a level where they're swayed by my mood while the cameras are rolling, shouldn't I just quit?
Am I not taking this seriously? Forget recruiting colleagues or whatever; I might need to use those Fame Points to awaken my own stats.
"Hyung, what about dinner...?"
"I'll go after I finish this. You guys eat first."
I stretched for quite a while before finally heading to the cafeteria.
My plan was to wash up, get the mid-term evaluation, and then come back out late at night to refine things. I felt like shit.
Slide.
Perhaps because it wasn't peak dinner time, the cafeteria was empty. Except for one guy who was using it like a study room.
"Hello, Hyung. Sit here."
It was Cheong-ryeo.
I immediately checked the corners of the walls and the table. The guy gave a sly smile.
"There are no cameras. But we can still talk, can't we?"
"......."
I put a reasonable amount of food on my tray and sat across from him. He had been checking a notebook with choreography formations written on it when he asked.
"You're not actually sick, are you?"
Since we shared a practice room, I guess he had overheard something.
"You already know, so why check?"
"Hmm? I'm checking because I know."
He closed his notebook and asked in a light tone.
"It's your first time having a piece of work that got a great response be erased, only to try using it in a different situation, right?"
"......."
"You seem to be quite bothered by it."
How the hell did he do this?
The words rose to my throat, but of course, I didn't say them. Fuck, he probably did it because he had to.
"Is it that stage? The one from the first team match in 〈Idol Inc.〉."
"Yeah."
"The first stage leaves a special impression. I still remember mine, too."
This guy's first stage?
"Come to think of it... I did mine in a survival show, too. Right here."
"......."
"We have quite a few interesting things in common. Don't we?"
He stared into space for a moment, silent, but soon gave a thin smile.
"It's okay. Once you try it, you'll realize it's nothing. You said this isn't even reality anyway, right? If anything, it'll just feel empty."
"...Maybe."
I listlessly set down the chopsticks I had poked into the tray.
To think I'm hearing this kind of talk from this guy.
"But the problem is that the rejection is affecting my condition."
"Oh dear."
He closed the notebook he was writing in. Then he spoke quietly.
"Don't practice anymore today; go to bed early. And eat well."
"......."
"A person's thinking ability is surprisingly dictated by their physical state. You do plan on managing yourself, right?"
I nodded slowly. He shrugged.
"Right... If you really think you can't do it, think of an alternative."
"Why would I do that?"
Thud!
I set my water glass down roughly.
"The correct answer exists, and I'm capable of doing it."
"You know it, then."
He stood up with a smile. Then he gestured toward my tray with his chin.
"Finish that and go to sleep."
"......."
I nodded. He left.
"Whew."
I felt like my already non-existent appetite had hit rock bottom.
[You really, really have to eat...!]
Isn't it better to just shove some glucose in my mouth rather than testing the possibility of getting indigestion?
[No way!?]
I chuckled at the horrified pop-up. My plans for what to do next were somewhat organized, but my condition sank further.
Once I start, it'll be fine... huh.
The fact that even that prediction felt disgusting was the problem. Damn it.
Over the next few minutes, I forced all the food on the tray into my stomach. It wasn't a very pleasant feeling.
And just as I was cleaning up my tray to leave.
Slide.
I heard the sound of the cafeteria door opening. I didn't bother to look, but I heard a voice.
A voice.
"Ah."
"...!"
I turned my head.
The guy I had seen two days ago was standing there.
Black-haired Seon A-hyun.
"Hello. We meet again."
"......."
I lowered my head and then raised it. But he waved his hands.
"You don't have to do that...! I'd prefer it if you spoke comfortably to me."
"You're appearing as a mentor; I can't do that."
"But we're not filming right now."
He smiled faintly, carefully closed the cafeteria door, and stepped inside.
Why bother?
"The traffic was good, so I arrived early. I was walking around and ended up here."
Is that so.
"May I sit here as well?"
He surely didn't think there was a participant who would tell a mentor no.
"Yes."
"Thank you...!"
I don't know what he's thankful for. It's become awkward to just get up and leave. I looked at my empty tray and agonized.
Then, a soft voice spoke first.
"I enjoyed the candy you gave me. It's a candy I occasionally eat, too. Um, for stamina replenishment during intermissions."
"Yes."
Right. I remember him spitting it out because it was time to go back on stage during a concert.
Here... he's probably talking about ballet performance intermissions.
Intermissions have a set break time, so he wouldn't have had to spit it out midway.
"......."
"......."
The conversation cut off with my short answer, and silence continued. Yet, this guy didn't seem to have any intention of stopping as he opened his mouth again.
"Actually, when I saw you in the hallway... you looked familiar, so I wondered if you were someone I knew."
What?
"But when I got closer, it didn't seem like a situation where I could ask that. You looked like you were in pain."
"Pain, you say."
Seon A-hyun flinched slightly but nodded.
"Yes. You look like you're in pain. Even now."
"......."
I must have been walking around in such a mess that everyone and their mother could read me.
What about the cameras?
No, I had already made the excuse that my condition was bad, so it should be fine. I didn't skip practice and worked properly, and I never spoke harshly to anyone else, so that much...
"You're under no obligation to confide in me... but I really hope you find someone to talk to. This is my counselor's number..."
"I'm fine."
Stop it.
"...Yes. I'm sorry. I overstepped my bounds."
Seon A-hyun's face clouded over. I suppressed a sigh. Then, as I was about to breathe out, the answer blurted out of me.
"It's not that you overstepped."
"Yes."
"It's just... I've made a stage with the same song and the same concept before."
"...This stage?"
"Yes."
I lowered my gaze.
"...It was the first stage I did with close friends I can't see right now, so I don't feel right about it being broadcast first with what I'm doing now."
Even as I said it, it sounded like a reason that made me wonder if I was sane.
Seon A-hyun's face clouded. I guess he's thinking something similar?
"Then... if it's that hard, why didn't you say anything?"
Why do you think?
"Because that way, the result will be better."
"...!"
"That stage got a good response. I'm not such a fool that I wouldn't use something that's already been proven."
He might misunderstand this reaction as something like another agency's monthly evaluation. I didn't care either way.
"......."
Seon A-hyun stared at the table for a moment, silent.
But soon, he spoke in a firm voice.
"A good result isn't the only answer. A choice where your own heart isn't in pain is also an answer."
"...!"
It was an unprofessional statement. But Seon A-hyun didn't back down.
"Victory isn't only achieved by facing and overcoming feelings you don't want to have."
He hesitated, then added in a faint voice.
"I... suffered because I lived while ignoring my heart too much."
"......."
"And Gun-woo, you can definitely show a good stage even if you change course. There is no single correct answer to a performance or its interpretation."
Then he concluded gently.
"So. You don't have to insist on pain with the mindset that you must overcome it. An alternative can also be the correct answer."
I couldn't find an answer.
I won't deny that the content was shocking and that I was momentarily tempted.
But one more thing.
...I thought he was living well without any major obstacles.
A refined way of speaking without stuttering, proactive communication in unfamiliar situations, and success that bordered on a legendary achievement.
He was a guy who already possessed everything the Seon A-hyun in my original world had been trying to reclaim.
To anyone looking, didn't this version look like the one living the better life?
But why is the stuff coming out of his mouth so... No, why is he talking about pain to someone he just met?
It's almost like.......
[Hyung?]
Ah.
the silence was too long.
I barely managed to respond.
"...Thank you. I'll take that into consideration."
It wasn't an answer saying I would do so, but Seon A-hyun nodded quite happily.
"No. You must have been surprised by a stranger saying such things, so thank you for taking it so maturely."
"No. I'm the one... who was comforted by your advice."
"I'm glad to hear that, then."
The atmosphere narrowly became warm. It was just a relief that the cameras weren't rolling.
With a brighter face, Seon A-hyun made this suggestion.
"And... there's not much of an age difference between us. You can call me comfortably."
"Then you should drop the formalities first, Mentor."
"Ah, um... if you drop them first."
He gave an awkward smile. I knew it.
And before I could say anything more, a call came from his staff, just like last time.
"Don't you have to go?"
"Ah. Yes."
Only then did he stand up.
"Even if the song changes, I'll tell them it's something I discussed with you, so don't worry."
And after saying something so absurd, he left the cafeteria.
Still, maybe because it was something a mentor said, I did feel a bit more at ease.
I don't necessarily have to do it... huh.
[Hyung... I think A-hyun is right. If you hate it, shouldn't you just not do it??]
That's separate from the shock. If it's necessary, I have to do it.
Vrrrrt!
The pop-up shook as if booing.
Stop it.
I'm not changing it for something like that.
Then, this time, it shrank as if dejected.
[T_T... Then how about just thinking of it as a cover stage collaboration? I mean, it's not like you're doing the same Idol Inc. you were on again! Just think of it as doing it with your juniors!]
It sounded like nonsense, but it was surprisingly persuasive.
Right, the timing is definitely different, and it's a completely different program. If I just clearly recognize that the two are separate situations...
"...!"
Wait.
[Hyung?]
Right.
You're right.
[Huh?]
I was mistaken.
〈Idol Inc.〉 and 〈Wise〉 are not the same program. Not only is there a difference in the year, but the progression method and the points of appeal to the target audience are also different.
In other words, the evaluation criteria are different.
Furthermore, the number of members participating, the theme of the performance, and the composition are all different, aren't they?
There's no guarantee that what was the perfect answer in the first team match of 〈Idol Inc.〉 would be the same here.
And if I recalculate the situation considering those differences... the first team match of Idol Inc. isn't the perfect answer for this place.
Ah... you stupid bastard.
I'm only realizing this now.
[Um... then?]
I came to a clean conclusion.
...I think I'll need to make some revisions.
[Oooooh!]
I chuckled and returned my tray.
The place I cleaned was spotless.
And before going into the mid-term evaluation, I gathered the teammates in the living room.
"Oh, Hyung!"
"I thought you were going to wash up."
"I have something to say."
I spoke without hesitation.
"I was wondering why I felt so uneasy, and it turns out there was one element we hadn't considered."
"Yes?"
"The mentor."
Right.
This time, the mentor doesn't just participate in the stage composition and give advice; they briefly participate in the stage itself.
Whether it's drawing pop art in the intro before exiting and having us appear by tearing that drawing, or having an orchestra provide a live accompaniment.
"Our mentor is a ballerino."
"That's... true, right?"
"We have to make sure he doesn't overshadow us."
There are no cameras in the living room yet. I spoke boldly.
"So, the same choreography won't work. The correct answer is for the two to create synergy with different vibes, making the stage feel fresher."
"Oh......"
The guys looked at each other, and Chae-yul spoke first.
"Then... are we revising it?"
"There are some elements to delete and some to add."
I paused for a moment, then spoke suggestively.
"Of course, if we do it this way, it'll probably be a forced march until the final..."
The guy's face brightened.
"It's okay. I like it!"
"Let's do it. Whatever."
As expected of VTIC. I've never been so glad that these 'yes-men' don't change.
"Good."
I opened the notebook I had brought.
And after passing through a mid-term evaluation filled with embarrassment, anticipation, and worry at the news that 'half of it would be overhauled'...
A few days later.
The day of the performance arrived.