Chapter 162
Chapter 162
When Keun Sejin opened the door, he was wearing something resembling a smile, but naturally, he didn't look happy.
"Um... coming in?"
"Yeah."
I walked into the room, pulled the door shut behind me, and lightly tossed the bottle of cold water I was holding.
"What's this? A 'drink some cold water and snap out of it' gift?"
"Among other things."
"Haha."
The guy wasn't finding any of this funny, but he was going through the motions of laughing.
Keun Sejin sat on the floor. He opened the bottle, drained nearly half of it, and then slowly began to speak.
"First off... I know that since things turned out like this, I’ll be the one to apologize and smooth things over anyway."
His voice was low and devoid of emotion.
"Once I’ve cooled down a bit, I’ll apologize on my own and keep my distance, so don't worry. I won't let something like this negatively affect the group."
"..."
His next words, however, carried a bit more feeling.
"I’m sorry to you and the other members. Everyone must have been shocked since we fought in the car."
I crossed my arms.
"...So you'll apologize to Bae Sejin-hyung, but you don't actually feel sorry?"
"Isn't that obvious?"
Keun Sejin let out a hollow laugh. He wiped his eyes with one hand.
"I really... I just don't get it. I think I’ve fulfilled every duty I have toward him as a teammate."
Keun Sejin began folding his fingers one by one as he continued.
"Right now, I’m basically teaching him half the choreography one-on-one. And every time the cameras are rolling, if he says something off-base or just shuts down, I’m the one who has to clean up the mess. It’s happened more than once or twice."
It was the truth.
Regardless of the fact that he didn't particularly like Bae Sejin, he had helped him as a teammate whenever they were active.
Though it probably wasn't out of the goodness of his heart for Bae Sejin's sake.
"And he calls that 'pretending to be close'... Hah."
Keun Sejin crushed the water bottle in his hand, then relaxed his grip as if trying to calm himself down.
"What does that even mean in front of a camera? This is work. Is he saying I shouldn't even talk to him when the cameras are on just because he's uncomfortable? And then he has the nerve to say he’s serious about work while I’m acting like it’s child’s play..."
I figured the friction had started somewhere around there.
Let's cut him off before he gets more heated.
"Right. I get what you're saying."
"..."
Keun Sejin silently gulped down more water.
I chose my words carefully.
"You contribute a lot to the team. Like you said, Hyung has unilaterally received a lot of help from you, whether he realized it or not."
"..."
"That’s probably why the pressure of knowing you dislike him felt even heavier."
I continued calmly.
"Because he has no choice but to keep receiving that help."
Regardless of how hard Bae Sejin gritted his teeth and tried, it couldn't be helped that his stats as an idol were lower than the other members.
He hadn't intended to be an idol in the first place.
So, driven by the thought that he was 'harming the team,' he likely suppressed his feelings, thinking it was his own cross to bear.
"That’s why he probably reached his breaking point and snapped. There were misunderstandings, too. I don't think he intentionally tried to make you look like the bad guy in front of the others."
Knowing this guy's personality, there was a high probability he thought Bae Sejin had intentionally tried to screw him over in front of everyone, so I slipped that in.
"..."
Sure enough, he seemed to have calmed down a bit.
Keun Sejin asked in a level voice.
"...Be honest. Did I sound like I was being sarcastic earlier?"
"In the car?"
"Yeah."
I stroked my chin.
"No."
I continued before Keun Sejin could respond.
"But you didn't sound sincere, either. It felt like you were saying things you didn't mean just to fit the mood."
If you only looked at that specific situation, what Keun Sejin said was similar to what the other members had said earlier.
The problem was everything that had built up until then.
Actually, in the very early days of our debut, you really did give off the vibe of 'I think you're a piece of shit, but we're a team, so I'll treat you with a smile.'
From Bae Sejin's perspective, that impression was so strong that it wasn't strange for him to feel like that insincere tone was constant sarcasm.
"I know you did it because you thought that was better for the team atmosphere than just ignoring him. But for some people, that can be even harder to endure."
"..."
"Of course, it would have been better if he had tried to discuss it with you privately when things were okay... but given his personality, he probably couldn't."
"I just don't understand."
I took a sip of my own water and gave a short laugh.
"It's just because your personality doesn't mesh with his."
"...Hah."
Keun Sejin pressed his hand against his forehead.
"Take this opportunity to actually talk to him."
If they could at least intellectually understand each other's logic, they might be able to tolerate each other under the premise of 'that bastard isn't actually trying to screw me over.'
However, the answer only came after quite a while.
"...I'm kind of sick of it, though."
It wasn't a very positive response.
"Of what?"
"Has he ever even tried to get along with me? Even once?"
"...!"
Keun Sejin spoke flatly.
"Do you remember? Ever since Idol Inc., he’d get all serious and cold the moment I said something he didn't like."
...Countless instances from the first team match onward flashed through my mind. I suppressed a groan.
"...That's true. Though he had his reasons."
"Moondae-ya, who here doesn't have 'reasons'? And it's not like anyone isn't trying."
Keun Sejin gave a sharp laugh.
"But let's not say that I should have been nicer to him just because he's trying, has his reasons, and is naturally sensitive."
His tone suggested he had completely given up on Bae Sejin.
"You saw it too. He's still like that. He looked disgusted the moment he found out he was booked for a variety show with me. Isn't that also rude? But when I try to be pleasant even though I dislike him, and it shows a little, that's 'sarcasm'?"
Keun Sejin looked somewhat exhausted.
"Fine, whatever. I get what you're saying. Like I said, I'll apologize. I'll just sleep on it... and talk to him tomorrow."
"..."
This is driving me crazy.
I held back a sigh, then just let it out.
"Hey, if it's that uncomfortable, don't do it."
"...!!"
"The album isn't going to fail just because you two are fighting... There's no need to force a half-hearted apology if you don't feel like it. I'd rather you guys just curse each other out and fight when we have time."
Keun Sejin shook his head.
"I can't."
"What?"
"We have a schedule starting tomorrow afternoon. We have to settle this before then so it doesn't show."
"..."
Wow, he really was something else.
His own feelings be damned, work comes first.
With that mindset, it was no wonder his feelings toward Bae Sejin—who could barely pull his own weight—weren't getting any better.
Plus, there's this guy's background.
I recalled one of the reasons I had come to see him.
Let's break down his logic first.
"There are seven members in our group. Even if you two don't talk, people will just think it's a coincidence once or twice. My attitude was complete trash for a whole month, and it didn't turn into a major problem."
Then, I moved to the main point. It was a bit... awkward to say, but there was no other way.
"And the reason I suggested talking to him is also based on my own experience. After I talked to Cheong-woo hyung... things got a bit better."
"...! That's different."
"No, there are similarities."
I drank some water.
"It wasn't that I was uncomfortable with him; it was that I was uncomfortable with the events I associated with him."
"..."
"I think it's the same for you."
"What is?"
"Among the many reasons you keep giving Bae Sejin-hyung such a harsh evaluation, isn't one of them that he's uncomfortable because he reminds you of something? He's the 'last member who used to be an actor,' after all."
"...!"
That was it. The past story Keun Sejin had shared while preparing for the concert unit stage had been weighing on my mind.
The reason he was cut from his previous debut group.
—Right before the launch, a new kid whose parents were both actors joined the group. He had recognition, so they had to put him in... but the higher-ups insisted on a seven-member group. What could they do? One person had to be cut.
Seeing Bae Sejin—who shared the 'actor' keyword and was the final member with less skill than himself—I wondered if that trauma hadn't subconsciously persisted.
"..."
Keun Sejin kept his mouth shut, looking like he'd been hit upside the head.
Honestly, I thought this might lead to a fight with me too, but he wasn't stupid; he would have understood what I meant.
"...Maybe so."
Yeah. I thought as much.
I nodded.
"That's why I was telling you to talk to him and find out what kind of person Bae Sejin-hyung actually is. I'm not telling you to understand him or apologize right away, but to judge him more calmly."
"..."
Keun Sejin wore a slow, bitter smile.
Then, after letting out a sigh, he shrugged his shoulders.
"...Fine, I get it. I'll try."
It was a response with a different nuance than his earlier "I'll talk to him."
It wasn't a half-hearted apology just to get through the situation, but a sincere intent to have a conversation.
That's that.
With this, I had achieved my primary goal.
I closed the cap on my water bottle and stood up from the floor.
"Good choice."
"Oh boy, you've worked hard, Professor Moondae."
"Cut it out."
"Haha!"
Keun Sejin was chuckling, but his face was deep in thought.
He was probably checking to see if there really were such irrational aspects to his own aversion.
He'll figure it out on his own.
Whether it turned out well or not, I was too tired to do any more. I massaged the back of my neck and opened the door to leave.
"I'm going to sleep."
"You do that. Oh, wait."
"What."
I thought it might be another question about Bae Sejin, but something unexpected came out.
"Your attitude wasn't that trashy back then, Moondae-ya. You were just sick but working hard. Cheong-woo hyung was just worried about you."
"...!"
"Thanks for caring. Good night."
Keun Sejin waved with a faint smile and closed the door.
Click.
"..."
I didn't expect to hear that.
It felt a bit strange.
"Hmm."
I stood in front of the closed door for a moment before snapping out of it and heading to the living room.
If Bae Sejin was still talking to Ryu Cheong-woo in the room, it would be awkward to go in.
In the living room, the three I had seen earlier were huddled together watching TV and whispering.
"When can we go into the room? I'm sleepy."
"L-let's wait just a little longer..."
"Endure it, you dummy. You can just sleep in the living room."
"I hate the floor, I like the bed."
"Is that more important than how the hyungs feel?"
"Both are important!"
Cha Yu-jin and Kim Rae-bin looked like they were about to grab each other's collars. Seon A-hyun was breaking out in a cold sweat.
"G-guys. Don't fight...!"
I suppressed a groan and spoke to them.
"...All of you, go inside."
"Hyung!"
"Moondae-hyung!"
"D-did they make up...?"
"No."
After making them promise not to ask any questions, I sent Cha Yu-jin back to the room with Keun Sejin and sent Kim Rae-bin to his room with instructions not to wait up for Ryu Cheong-woo.
Then I said to Seon A-hyun, "Let's just sleep in the living room."
"O-okay!"
Looks like I'm sleeping somewhere other than a bed for the first time since debut. It makes me realize how well things have been going until now.
But the moment I pulled blankets out of the closet in the other room, Ryu Cheong-woo came out of our room.
"Hyung."
"Ah, guys. ...Did you bring out blankets??"
"W-we thought the conversation might go long..."
"Ah, it's okay. Go in and sleep. I'm done talking with Sejin."
"Did it go well?"
"Hmm..."
Ryu Cheong-woo had a complicated expression.
"...It seems Sejin has been struggling quite a bit. I can't say it's strictly anyone's fault, but... we should definitely set up a time for the two of them to clear the air. How was Lee Sejin's side?"
"He said he'd talk once he's gathered his thoughts."
"Good. Then let's see how things are tomorrow and talk again."
"Yes. You worked hard."
"Hard? You're the one who worked hard."
It seemed Ryu Cheong-woo had spent the whole time listening to Bae Sejin. After a brief good-night, I returned to the room with Seon A-hyun to find Bae Sejin in a much more stable state.
"...I'm sorry. The atmosphere was uncomfortable because of me, wasn't it?"
"N-no, it's not...! Hyung, are you okay...?"
"I'm fine. Just... anyway, I'm sorry. I'll be careful."
Bae Sejin said that with a pale, swollen face, then lay down on his bed and became deathly still.
Even without looking, I could feel the stress swirling inside him.
He must be in total agony.
I didn't need to hear it to know.
His thoughts were probably a roller coaster, ranging from 'Was I too much?' to 'No, but that bastard...'
"..."
As Seon A-hyun quietly crept to his bed like a mouse, I sighed, turned off the light, and lay down on my own bed.
I didn't get to do any monitoring.
I had originally planned to do it in the car, but as you know, that had been impossible.
Should I do some now?
I turned on my smartphone and slowly checked the public opinion, starting with news articles.
But before long, I heard a small voice.
"...Not sleeping?"
It was Bae Sejin. Conscious of the sleeping Seon A-hyun, his voice was barely a whisper.
"Not yet."
"..."
Bae Sejin was silent for a while.
Then, a moment later, a very hesitant, raspy voice spoke.
"Hey... was I in the wrong?"
I could feel his anxiety.
"No. It'll be okay."
It was just... two guys who were terribly incompatible had both tried to endure each other for the sake of the group, and it had finally festered.
If I had to pick, Bae Sejin was the more vulnerable one, so it must have been harder for him.
"...Hmm."
Sniff.
I heard a very faint sob, as if he had pulled the covers over his head. He clearly didn't want to be caught.
I turned off my smartphone and quietly closed my eyes, pretending not to notice so as not to make a scene.
They'll reach a conclusion once they talk.
Until then, I should keep the two of them apart.
That was my thought—before I could have ever imagined that those two would end up in the same group for the W Live the very next day.