Tickled by Lesser Outer Gods

When Leydan Tantun suddenly barged into the room and got swarmed by the lesser Outer Gods, the Hunter thought ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠the madman was courting death. But as time dragged on, she couldn't hide her growing bewilderment. Here was Tantun, under assault from a horde of lesser Outer Gods, not writhing in agony but cackling like a kid.

"Ehehehe! Stop, stop! I'm dying—it's too ticklish!"

"Huh…."

Watching Tantun claim even the lesser Outer Gods' attacks were just tickles, the Hunter revised her assessment of him upward.

'I thought he was just a lunatic, but he's got the mental fortitude and toughness to shrug off a swarm of lesser Outer Gods. Proving it like this takes some serious confidence.'

A glint flashed in the Hunter's eyes.

The lesser Outer Gods' tickle assault finally eased up, letting me sit up and catch my breath. They slid down my body to the floor, giggling at the sight. One was still nuzzling my cheek, clinging to my ear. It reminded me of my old pet parrot, so I absentmindedly scratched its chin. Delighted, it beamed with utter bliss and melted into me.

…It's humanoid, though. Feels a bit guilty doing this.

I needed to head back to the Hunter and the thief, but peeling off these clingy lesser Outer Gods was tricky. Their leader spoke up.

"The inside and outside are divided by a boundary. We can't affect anything out there. No guarantees if you go in, though."

"Doesn't that mean I could've been in danger too?"

"You're fine, aren't you? Hehe."

"Yeah, yeah!"

Guess Outer Gods gonna Outer God. The lesser ones snickered mischievously.

Anyway, with one on each shoulder, I approached the Hunter. She squeezed her eyes shut in resignation.

"…I never imagined you'd be this insane."

She murmured low, sighing. Hey, you told me to prove it. I just shrugged at her.

"See? No big deal."

"Anyone but you couldn't pull off that kind of madness."

Agartha nodded vigorously from behind, clearly rattled—sweat beading on her brow as she pointed at the one on my shoulder.

"Uh, no, what's that on your shoulder?"

"Cute, right? Like little fairies."

I meant it sincerely, but Agartha recoiled in outright disgust, waving her hands.

"You might wanna rethink your tastes, Tantun."

Okay, it's a weird taste, but they're seriously cute. What can I do? I stroked the one on my right; it grabbed my finger and rubbed its cheek against it. See? Adorable.

"…Grotesque."

"Try embracing it with a broader mind."

"How broad does my mind need to be to see those writhing tentacles wrapping your finger as cute?!"

Fair point—Super Coward Mode makes them look different to her. Whatever. If they're cute to me, that's enough.

The blissed-out lesser Outer God squinted slyly, smiling.

"Annoying?"

"Kinda pissing me off."

"Kill her?"

Despite the cute, drawling voice, those were killer words. I flicked its forehead with my index finger.

"Eep!"

"Tsk, don't say stuff like that with such a cute face."

"Okay~."

"Aww, good girl."

Reward pretty girls, right? I tickled behind its ear; it shivered like goosebumps, then flopped over and passed out. I seriously wanted to take it home.

Agartha still looked like she'd witnessed something eldritch.

"What… did you just say to it?"

"Asked if it should kill you?"

"Wha—no way, you're joking."

"Dead serious."

Agartha stared blankly at it, then backed away over ten paces in a flash. Seeing a perpetual prankster like her spooked was a sight.

"Time to help us out, yeah?"

The leader lesser Outer God was getting impatient, so show-off time was over. The Hunter should trust me now.

"Anyway, I'm good. I'll check inside."

She rubbed her forehead like she'd given up, nodding. Agartha's eyes screamed just go already with those things, so I didn't bother her.

The passage was filled with floral scents. The Hunter had called it a foul stench—Mode's doing, huh? The chattering lesser Outer Gods mobbed the giggling one on me.

"Traitor! Hogging it all!"

"Hehehe…."

"Fine, guess we gotta get in on this too!"

They lunged again; I braced to flee, but the leader whistled them back.

"Enough! Don't hassle the human more!"

"Tch, you were glued to him the whole time."

"Shush!"

Calm restored, one sheepishly smiled.

"We like being petted. Mom used to, but she hasn't visited much lately."

Mom who? Before I could ask, the leader jabbed a finger ahead, unable to hold back.

"Take what's inside. Do that, and we're done."

Ah, called it—a gimmick item. They skipped straight to it, dodging the 'mom' topic. Smart to avoid spoilers. Build-specific mental resistance required; no wonder early-game players skip it. Gnarly setup.

What legendary item awaited? Irregular polyhedron? Indescribable shape? Pumped, I followed their lead.

What I found….

"What the hell is this."

A dog bone. At least realistic-ish, but no—it was cartoonishly simple, straight out of a comic.

Sudden deflation.

"All this for this…."

"Huh?"

"Nah, nothing. I'll take it."

The bone gleamed ethereally, enshrined deep inside. Glory of glory, or sorry of sorrow? Drooping in regret, another lesser Outer God huffed.

"Mom said it'd give us bodies, but we prefer cats over dogs."

"Yeah! Something cute."

Cats, huh. I tossed out, "Ask for fish bones next time?"

"Yay, yes!"

They approved. Mode's fault for the shape, probably.

Hard to believe this topples an Outer God, but I grabbed the dog bone anyway.

"Tantun's gone, so we just wait? Wanna play poker?"

Less than a minute in, bored Agartha pulled cards from the guardroom stash, offering to the Hunter.

The Hunter eyed her like trash.

"…Can't you at least suggest it?"

"Pathetic."

"Tch, forget it then."

The Hunter shook her head at Agartha—then her pupils dilated.

"W-what?"

Agartha panicked, but the Hunter yanked her behind by the arm.

"Hey, what's—!"

"Quiet."

The shift from her usual irritation tensed Agartha up. After a beat, the Hunter whispered.

"No sound makes it hard to notice."

"…?"

"The stench is thickening. It's close."

Agartha saw the Hunter's exposed face twist—far from her usual stoic severity.

Thud. Thud.

"Shh."

As Agartha gaped to speak, the Hunter clamped her ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠mouth shut with a finger. She knew to hide too, but couldn't budge.

Thud. Thud. Sniff. Sniff.

Tears welled in Agartha's eyes; the Hunter bit her lip. She'd never imagined this.

Sniff. Sniff.

That madman was right. No reason for the sleeping one to wake otherwise. The key to beating it really is here.

Sniff. Thud, thud, thud….

The tension eased as the sounds faded. The Hunter waited stock-still till they vanished completely. Agartha, still clutched tight, waited too. Even silent now, the Hunter wouldn't move, so she flushed.

"…It's gone. Let go—"

"Stupid bitch."

The sudden curse jolted Agartha; she paled at the Hunter's sweat-slicked, eerie half-smile. People act opposite in crisis—and Agartha recalled the Hunter never smiled.

She realized her massive screw-up.

"Hate overconfident types."

Sand shifting first. Crack. Crack. Crack. Crack… Thud, thud, thudthudthudthudthud.

Vibrations intensified; the Hunter shoved Agartha back and retreated.

"Shit, incoming!"

A deafening roar shattered the prison. They dodged debris instinctively, knowing an Outer God did it. Then crushing head pressure hit them both.

"Kyaa!"

Agartha yelped, arms wrapping instinctively—then tried removing them as rubble cleared. But she couldn't. Her body refused to face forward.

Can't cope if I don't look. Forcing it, she peered ahead.

"…Ah, aaah."

Agartha shook her head frantically.

"No… no."

Color drained from her face; she clutched her temples with both hands.

"No, no…."

She slowly banged her forehead on the floor, then twisted her hands behind her head, curling up tight like hiding from something, legs tucked.

"Don't watch don't look hate ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠it don't surveil me sorry don't look I was wrong don't surveil please don't look don't surveil don't look."

Pure madwoman. Possessed. Chanting nonstop, she suddenly gasped for air, then slowly uncurled. Powder-like dust sifted from her body.

Indescribable, but the Hunter knew instantly.

"…Hid an amulet on you. That's why you read that madman's note without fear?"

"Hah, hah. How do you read women so well? Thought you were heartless since it didn't faze you in the cell."

Playing it cool, but Agartha still looked drained.

"Seriously, without this… whew. Almost toast."

But the Hunter knew this mere suggestion was nothing to the surveiller. More like, doomed ahead.

A dog shape. A faux dog. A wolf covered in eyes. The Observer.

The suggestion crept back; headaches pounded, indescribable terror dominating their minds.

Kill yourself now. Kill yourself now. Kill yourself now. Kill yourself. Suicide. Die. Death.

This Outer God was soon to be Shaluqui.