Chapter 11 Secret Pleasures (Mom, Seon-ju, Se-young)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 11 Secret Pleasures (Mom, Seon-ju, Se-young)
Back to that morning.
"I already spoke to Gyu-ri. She said she’ll be home this afternoon, so stop by after your academy and pick up the blindfold."
Seon-mi spoke to her son, Si-woo, as he was getting ready for his academy and heading out the door.
"Okay, I got it. Just the blindfold, right? I'm heading out now."
"Right. Be careful on your way~"
After seeing her son off, Seon-mi had finally sent all the children to their respective academies.
The loud, chaotic morning routine she performed like a daily ritual had finally come to an end.
Left alone in the empty house, a strange sense of time settled over her.
As if trying to fill that void with busyness, Seon-mi moved her body restlessly.
She went to the laundry room to deal with the accumulated clothes and started the washing machine.
She moved to the kitchen, cleared the dining table, and did the dishes.
Once the dishes were done, she began cleaning the house.
She finished the living room, the kitchen, the laundry room, and the master bedroom before moving on to the stairs and the second-floor corridor.
She didn't touch the children's rooms.
Emptying their trash cans was the extent of it.
That was Seon-mi’s educational philosophy—respecting her children's privacy.
When the cleaning was finished, she took the completed laundry out of the machine and hung it on the drying rack.
Only then did Seon-mi catch her breath.
As a full-time housewife, Seon-mi had diligently repeated these tasks almost every day for nearly twenty years.
Soon, she headed to the bathroom to wash away the sweat she had worked up while cleaning.
In front of the bathroom was a space that served as both a laundry room and a changing room.
She stripped off her clothes in the changing room.
She caught a glimpse of her lilac panties hanging on the drying rack along with the other laundry.
Seon-mi had recently become aware that Si-woo had started masturbating.
The semen smell wafting from the trash can in Si-woo's room.
His clumsy cleanup.
It seemed Se-hee had also noticed her younger brother's masturbation.
Her suggestive morning outfits.
Se-hee throwing out mischievous sexual jokes.
Even if those were meant for teasing between siblings rather than actual seduction, the effect was the same.
Her son’s erect cock.
Seon-mi knew that her son reacted even when looking at her.
That was why she always had to be careful to dress modestly inside the house.
And Seon-mi knew that the panties she had taken off yesterday evening had disappeared.
She knew that Si-woo had used her panties to masturbate...
The male scent of semen that had remained on the panties.
Si-woo didn't know, but Seon-mi made sure to change the trash can in his room every single day.
Today, the amount of toilet paper was much higher than usual.
The smell seemed thicker, too.
Seon-mi thought it was only natural for a man and a woman to feel excitement when exposed to accidental stimulation, even if they were family.
However, perceiving a family member as a sexual object to gain intentional arousal was a different matter.
That was what made Seon-mi anxious and irritable.
Seon-mi opened the opaque glass bathroom door, stepped inside, stood before the shower, and turned on the water to soak her body.
She applied body cleanser to a shower towel, worked up a lather, and spread it over her skin.
After stroking her breasts, belly, and flanks several times, she moved her right hand toward her groin.
She extended her middle finger, aligning it with her slit, and rubbed it vigorously for a long while.
Once it was sufficiently wet, she found the hole and slid her finger inside with a squelch.
In that state, she used her thumb to circle and stimulate her clitoris.
Her hand movements were remarkably practiced.
A sweet pleasure enjoyed after diligent labor.
This time of liberation was precious to Seon-mi.
Seon-mi had always been a person with a strong sex drive.
Even when her husband was alive, she often enjoyed these secret moments of liberation separately from their marital relations.
When her husband had an affair, when she found out the partner was her own daughter, and even when her husband met his death without reaching any kind of resolution—Seon-mi had engaged in obsessive masturbation to maintain her image as the perfect mother.
For Seon-mi, this time was almost the only compensatory act that allowed her to find balance in her life.
A secret means of pleasurable compensation to relieve tension and pressure, allowing her to maintain her life as a proper mother.
To Seon-mi, this was more than an addiction; it was akin to a religious meditative act.
After reaching a climax that felt detached from reality, Seon-mi sprawled out on the floor, savoring the long afterglow.
She left no traces behind.
* * *
Time passed, and around the afternoon after a simple lunch, her younger sister Seon-ju came to visit.
Seon-ju, who wasn't much younger than Seon-mi, was a single mother with a daughter named Su-a, who was the same age as Se-young.
Seon-ju knew that her late brother-in-law had an affair, and she knew that the partner was Se-jin.
Along with Gyu-ri, she was one of the few special acquaintances who shared Seon-mi’s secrets.
Seon-ju dropped by Seon-mi’s house often.
They were close to begin with, and they lived nearby.
Because Seon-ju knew the situation with her brother-in-law and Se-jin, she had been paying extra attention to her older sister since his death.
While the two were talking over tea, the conversation turned to Se-hee’s clothing.
"You should show a little skin among family at home! Se-hee’s doing the right thing!"
The aunt began to speak, taking Se-hee’s side.
"Right thing, my foot. That little fox is just teasing Si-woo~"
Having seen Si-woo being tormented that morning, Seon-mi reacted to Seon-ju’s words with even more agitation out of pity for him.
"I’m telling you, if you keep yourself all covered up like that at home, boys will just lose their immunity to stimulation! Didn't you say he started masturbating with your panties? If you're going to pretend not to know anyway, shouldn't you help him out like Se-hee so he can blow his load comfortably?"
Seeing her sister get worked up, Seon-ju spoke teasingly this time.
"Excuse me? Si-woo is my son. Are you going to take responsibility if something happens again?"
Seon-mi replied as if Seon-ju’s words were absurd.
Seon-ju couldn't tease or joke anymore. She realized that the word 'again' in Seon-mi’s sentence was spoken with Se-jin’s incident in mind.
Seon-mi seemed to realize it right after saying it, and the two fell silent for a moment.
After a brief silence, Seon-ju was the first to speak.
"Does Se-jin still not come home much? Does she still not answer your calls?"
"Yeah. I think she took a leave of absence from university and started a part-time job. I hear news through Si-woo, but..."
Seon-mi’s voice trailed off.
"You should go see her and try to talk it out. You can't keep living like this forever."
Seon-ju felt sorry for the state of their relationship.
"It still feels a bit awkward. Let's stop talking about that."
Seon-mi cut Seon-ju off, brushing the topic aside.
No matter how much they shared secrets, one cannot know the innermost thoughts of another person.
Seon-mi had already forgiven Se-jin.
In her heart, a thousand, ten thousand times over...
Because no matter what she had done, Se-jin was still Seon-mi’s daughter.
But what Se-jin wanted wasn't forgiveness.
She wanted recognition of the relationship—that she had been accepted as a woman by her mother's husband.
And the ritual beyond that, where mother and daughter would cease to be mother and daughter, which might have happened had the husband stayed alive.
To Seon-mi, whose identity as a mother was so strong, that was far too cruel.
"Then, Unnie, let's all see each other this weekend with Gyu-ri Unnie~ I'm going now!"
After chatting for about thirty more minutes, Seon-ju said her goodbyes and left, promising to meet again.
* * *
Today, Seon-mi had made a hospital appointment for Se-young’s psychiatric evaluation.
Recently, Se-young hadn't been able to fall asleep alone at night.
As her mother, Seon-mi was worried about her daughter, but she also felt considerable pressure about her secret moments of liberation being interrupted.
Se-young had started pestering her at all hours, asking to touch Seon-mi’s breasts and suckle on them.
She had reluctantly let her a few times, but she had to suffer quite a bit because of the unpleasant heat that rose in her body afterward.
Since then, she had tried coaxing, soothing, and even scolding her, but Se-young’s childish behavior only grew worse.
Seon-mi left a text message for Se-hee.
It was a notification about her outing with Se-young and detailed instructions to make sure she and Si-woo ate dinner.
She didn't write much else, other than that the outing was for Se-young’s psychological counseling.
She took a taxi to the academy to pick up Se-young when her classes ended.
Se-young was waiting for her mother in front of the school gates.
She had told Se-young about it the day before.
Throughout the taxi ride to the hospital, her daughter was silent, seemingly very nervous.
Upon arriving at the hospital, they checked in and went straight into the consultation room.
Seon-mi participated alongside her daughter in the lengthy tests and counseling.
Anxiety disorder.
According to the doctor, Se-young was exhibiting infantile regression symptoms.
The doctor added that rather than scolding her, it would be better to set aside specific times where she could be pampered.
That was essentially telling her to allow the childish behaviors her daughter demanded... like suckling on her mother's breasts like a baby, at set times.
Se-young seemed secretly happy, even if she didn't say it.
It wasn't that Seon-mi disliked letting Se-young suckle.
It was just that the struggle to deal with the arousal that followed after letting Se-young suckle was painful.
By the time they left the hospital, it was dark outside.
They took a taxi again and went to eat the chicken breast and egg rice bowl that Se-young liked.
Throughout the meal, Se-young kept her arms wrapped around her mother's waist, rubbing her face against her mother's large, soft breasts.
Like a young child overjoyed at being allowed to act spoiled.
Seon-mi found Se-young’s innocence so lovely that she decided to just let Se-young do as she pleased.