The Day After the April Exams
The day after the April exams, Choi Su-yeon once again showed up at the third-year cafeteria during lunch and naturally squeezed herself into the table where Lee Yu-ri and Jeong Eun-ji were eating together.
"Hey, didn't I tell you not to come to the third-year cafeteria?" Jeong Eun-ji, who didn't particularly like Choi Su-yeon, snapped at her the moment she saw her. But Choi Su-yeon didn't even bat an eye. She plopped down right next to me and replied with a completely straight face.
"I think I said 'I don't want to' too, didn't I? What, if you tell me to die, do I have to die? If you don't like it, bring me a school rule that actually lets you kick me out."
"This bitch...!"
"Ha... So why the hell are you here again?"
Lee Yu-ri grabbed Jeong Eun-ji, who was about to jump up in anger, and pulled her back down with a deep sigh. Yu-ri had looked incredibly irritated since yesterday, and it was showing clearly in her attitude today.
......
Just like every morning lately, I'd gone to wait in front of Lee Yu-ri's house early that day. She came down not long after—empty-handed.
"Huh? Did you oversleep?"
"What are you talking about?" Her voice was already sharp and cranky.
"I thought you forgot the lunchbox."
"What am I, your mom? Or your maid? Figure out your own meals! How long do I have to keep taking care of you?!"
"Wait, you're the one who offered to make them in the first place—"
"Forget it, I don't care! I'm annoyed! I'm not making you lunch anymore! Buy your own damn food!"
......
That had been this morning. Ever since, Yu-ri's mood had been at rock bottom. Now she looked less angry and more exhausted. Choi Su-yeon, completely unaware of any of this, smiled brightly at her.
"Yu-ri sunbae, I heard. You're all studying at your house this weekend, right?"
"And?"
"Let me join too."
"We're not getting together to play around."
"That hurts. I'm not coming to play. I'm coming to study too."
"Teaching two people is already pushing it. I can't handle three."
"Hmm? I think you've got the wrong idea, sunbae."
"...?"
Choi Su-yeon flashed a radiant smile at the confused Yu-ri and Eun-ji.
"I'm not the one who's going to be learning. I'll be the one teaching. Of course, if I get stuck on something, I'll ask you, Yu-ri sunbae."
"...... You?"
Yu-ri looked her up and down with an expression that screamed one hundred percent suspicion.
"You really don't believe me at all, huh."
"Isn't that obvious? I know some underclassmen in the student council, so I have a rough idea of the top second-years' grades. You're not even on the list. Actually, aren't you at the very bottom of the second-years? Even if you were top of the class, it'd be questionable, but the worst student trying to teach someone? Please."
"Hehehe, allow me to reveal a shocking truth right here. Surprisingly, I don't suck at studying—I just haven't been doing it!"
"Birds of a feather really do flock together. You sound exactly like that idiot Han Seong-jin," Jeong Eun-ji scoffed, tearing into her.
But instead of getting upset, Choi Su-yeon looked even happier and smiled wider. Yu-ri pretended to stretch her arm back and elbowed Eun-ji hard.
"Ow! Why'd you hit me?!"
"Sorry. My bad."
Eun-ji might not have realized it, but that was definitely on purpose. Yu-ri lied through her teeth with a straight face and stared blankly at Choi Su-yeon before answering in a bored tone.
"No. Even if what you're saying is true, there's no way to prove it. Like I said before, I'm not a teacher. I can't teach three people."
"Wow, I really have zero credibility, huh. It's been a while since I last studied seriously, so I'm a bit rusty on other subjects, but at the very least, I'm better at English than you, Yu-ri sunbae."
The provocation struck right at the pride of the school’s top student. Yu-ri fell for it instantly. Her eyebrows twitched violently, and she growled with a much angrier expression than before.
"You better be ready to take responsibility for that statement."
"Of course."
Yu-ri suddenly fired off a question in English. I was already terrible at the language, so I had no idea what she was saying.
"Ha... Fine. Looks like you weren't lying."
After just a few exchanges, Yu-ri quickly accepted it. The one who was more shocked was Jeong Eun-ji.
"What? Already? What did she even say?"
"I just asked her some basic English stuff. She's actually good."
"No way. This delinquent..."
"Isn't it a bit rude to insult someone right in front of their face? Anyway, Yu-ri sunbae, that means I can join you guys on Saturday, right?"
"Ugh, seriously, why is this... I don't even know anymore. Do whatever the hell you want."
Yu-ri grumbled in a completely drained voice, as if she'd given up, then ate her meal half-heartedly. Unlike her usual self, she got up and left before everyone else had even finished eating.
Her crooked, prickly attitude that had continued since morning looked to me like she was crying out, 'Pay attention to me too.' I hurriedly finished my own meal and stood up.
"I'm heading out first today, Su-yeon."
"Ehh... I haven't even eaten half my food yet..."
"Sorry. There's something on my mind. Just this once, okay?"
Choi Su-yeon narrowed her eyes like she'd figured out exactly where I was going. Then she scooped up some soup with her spoon in an indifferent manner and answered in a pouty voice.
"Just this once."
I gently squeezed her hand to show my gratitude. For a brief moment, we stared into each other's eyes while our fingertips lingered together.
......
"Just asking to be sure—are you two dating?"
"Hmm... It's kind of similar, but not quite there yet?"
"It's either yes or no. What the hell is that answer? Are you saying you're in the talking stage? Wait, hold on. Hey! Your so-called talking-stage guy is making moves on Yu-ri and you didn't even notice?"
"I did notice, though?"
"......?"
Yu-ri wasn't in the classroom. When she was feeling troubled, there was only one place she went.
Knock knock knock.
I went to the student council room and knocked on the door. There was no answer from inside.
"I'm coming in."
Still silence. I grabbed the handle and pushed the door open. The unlocked door swung open smoothly, revealing Yu-ri slumped over the desk. Her long black hair spilled across the surface, and she was in the classic sleeping-during-class pose, face buried in her arms. She didn't even lift her head.
But I knew she wasn't actually sleeping. Yu-ri was the type who would study alone during lunch, not waste time dozing off. Still, I asked the obvious question.
"You asleep?"
"......"
"I know you're not really sleeping."
"Go away, you jerk..."
Yu-ri mumbled weakly, still face-down. I pulled out the chair beside her and sat down, but she still wouldn't look at me.
"Why are you so pissed off?"
"Go play with Eun-ji and Choi Su-yeon or something."
"Is our Yu-ri sulking? Are you jealous?"
As I said that and stroked her hair, Yu-ri finally shot upright.
"Yes, I'm mad! You said you like me! You said you'd keep telling me no matter how many times I wanted to hear it! But... but what's with that whole vibe between you and Choi Su-yeon? And Eun-ji keeps butting in without reading the room! Why did I even... invite everyone to study together on the weekend... I-I called you... uuu..."
As she spoke, her eyes grew watery with resentment.
"You two could have spent some time alone, talked about stuff... and done other things too... I thought about it a lot in my own way! I even prepared answers to the things you said before... But it's all ruined now! I have no idea what you're thinking, Choi Su-yeon keeps interfering, and Eun-ji won't stop inserting herself!"
After pouring out her emotions, Yu-ri flopped back down onto the desk.
"Everything's so annoying... Why does it always end up like this for me..."
"Yu-ri."
I called her name gently and took the hand she'd left dangling. Her body, still face-down, gave a big flinch.
"...What."
"I'll say it clearly. I like you."
"......"
Choi Su-yeon had accepted that I would be involved with Yu-ri too, but Yu-ri wasn't emotionally or situationally ready for that kind of relationship yet. Still, since I knew I'd have to tell her eventually, I decided to slowly lower the walls around her heart.
"As you know, I haven't exactly lived a clean life."
"I know."
"That's why, starting this year, I've cut off all that crap. It's late, but I'm trying to live like a decent human being. I don't want to be the kind of guy who embarrasses you when we're together."
"...... Is that true?"
"It's not a hundred percent because of you that I decided to reform, but your influence definitely isn't small. I know why you're upset, but just know that my feelings for you haven't changed at all."
Yu-ri slowly lifted her head. The tip of her nose was slightly red, like she was holding back tears. After staring at me for a long time, she finally spoke.
"I heard from Eun-ji about what you did in middle school. That you got her friend pregnant and made her get an abortion."
Ah, shit. I genuinely had zero memory of that. How the hell could that bastard erase something like that from his mind?
"Disgusted?"
"Yeah."
Well, if she wasn't disgusted after hearing about that trash behavior, that would be even weirder. But what Yu-ri said next was a little unexpected.
"...I think I might actually be crazy."
"Why?"
"After hearing something like that, I should feel revolted. Normally I'd never want to see your face again."
"......"
"But... even after hearing all that... what really pissed me off was Eun-ji and Choi Su-yeon butting in. When I hear you say you like me again, my mood lifts and my heart starts racing. It's obvious you've hurt more than a few people with the things you've done. I know you're a hopeless piece of trash. And I really, really hate guys like that. But still... when I hear you say you like me, I feel happy. We've only been having normal conversations for about a month... This can't possibly be normal. I really am crazy. There's something wrong with my head."
"Yu-ri."
I moved closer and pulled her into a light embrace. Our first hug. We'd gone a bit further than just holding hands before, but Yu-ri accepted me without much resistance.
"The crazy part, the not-normal part—that's all because of the things I've done. Not you."
"Uuu..."
"I don't know how believable this sounds after only a month, but I'm not the same person I used to be. Of course, what I did in the past won't just disappear."
"...Yeah."
"You can hate me all you want, but don't think the feelings you're having are wrong."
"...I don't hate you anymore."
Having said that, Yu-ri buried her face completely into my chest out of embarrassment. The two of us stayed like that, feeling each other's warmth, holding each other tightly until lunch ended.