The One Who Fed the Fire
The one who had sparked the fire was himself, but the one who kept feeding it was Go Young-in.
Whenever it had nothing to do with his own debut, Go Young-in was always indifferent—impossible to read, impossible to tell what he was thinking.
He didn’t even bother acknowledging most provocations.
So the ones who had originally meant to pick a little fight and let it go found themselves growing stubborn instead, unwilling to back off until they got some kind of reaction out of him.
Son Jeong-hoon thought it was the natural consequence of his own actions.
That was exactly why Go Young-in’s existence grew even more hateful. The way he acted as if none of this mattered to him at all was infuriating.
It made Jeong-hoon feel like he was the only one losing his temper, the only one flailing, and that chipped away at his pride.
He wanted to leave a crack in that dead, unruffled face.
In class, Go Young-in was basically a walking punching bag. Even when people treated him like dirt in the open or made absurd demands of him, he remained stubbornly obedient.
All Jeong-hoon had to do was stand beside him, pretend to calm the others down, and act like he was on Go Young-in’s side.
He got to protect his image, and still screw over someone he hated. A win-win, wasn’t it?
It was only after Kyeon In-woo started missing school more and more often that Go Young-in’s always-fine responses began to change for the first time.
Jeong-hoon didn’t know why In-woo had suddenly become so absent, but he could tell that lately there had been raised voices between Go Young-in and Kyeon In-woo, and that the two of them had grown awkward with each other.
Once Kyeon In-woo stopped paying attention, the bullying and violence escalated as if everyone had been waiting for this moment. It became more frequent, more subtle, and far more vicious.
Jeong-hoon lightly brushed the dust off Go Young-in’s uniform shirt after it had been scraped across the floor, then asked as casually as ever, "Go Young-in, are you okay?"
Go Young-in, who had been staring blankly at some point in the air since earlier, rolled his eyes and looked at him.
He wiped lightly at the corner of his split lip and nodded.
"I’m okay…."
By then, even that impressive mental toughness must have reached its limit, because every so often Go Young-in did look tired.
If he had so much as bent a little, Jeong-hoon might have felt a scrap of pity. But that reaction—as if nothing had happened—was disgusting.
Still, by this point Jeong-hoon was certain of one thing.
Even from Go Young-in’s sluggish answers and the faint crease in his brow, it was obvious that he had been shaken, however slightly.
So that lofty pride of his had finally cracked! Jeong-hoon wanted to drive the final nail in.
"There’s no way you’re okay."
"Just…"
"Just what?"
Go Young-in, who had pressed his lips together and stared into space, rubbed his face with one hand like a man who had given up.
"I’m just a little tired…."
"Ha."
Only then did Jeong-hoon smile for real.
At least all that effort he’d put into sticking to him had paid off; maybe Go Young-in had started to think they were close, because he answered like this sometimes. It was almost funny, saying things like that to the very person who had caused all this in the first place.
Actually, I’m the one who said to isolate you. Jeong-hoon wondered what expression would crumble first if he said it out loud.
"Makes sense. But you’ve just got to endure it. What else can you do? You still have to debut, and getting tangled up in nonsense won’t do you any good."
"I was just—"
"Ha… Go Young-in."
Jeong-hoon let out an exaggerated sigh and put on an annoyed face, and Go Young-in shut his mouth.
"You should’ve just played along in moderation. You know it’s not like you had no fault in this at all, right?"
"…"
"Forget it. If not me, who else would give you advice like this? You think we’d bother bullying you for no reason? Think about it, Go Young-in. You must’ve done something wrong."
Go Young-in grew even quieter.
He had already been carefully trampled, physically and mentally, so Jeong-hoon felt reassured that for a while at least, he wouldn’t even have the nerve to try recovering.
And yet Go Young-in endured. He clung on with ridiculous tenacity.
Why? Why wouldn’t he give up? Why wouldn’t he collapse?
Jeong-hoon couldn’t understand it.
As if he had never been shaken at all, Go Young-in’s skill remained rock-solid, and on top of that, he kept improving, moving forward.
No matter how much they poked at him, his mind might have crumbled, but his abilities only widened the gap until they were no longer even within reach.
Why? How? Was this what the difference in talent looked like? It made his stomach twist.
He felt filthy. The longer they stayed around each other, the more his own pathetic lack of ability stood out, and the uglier something inside him seemed to grow.
And then that game—brief as it had felt, but long enough to rot him from the inside—came to an end after Go Young-in’s accident.
On the day of the final evaluation, the important one that might have placed Go Young-in in the debut lineup, he was in an accident.
Of course, he couldn’t take the test.
Go Young-in, hospitalized, didn’t come to school for a while. Being in the hospital seemed to expose all the signs of the violence he’d been subjected to as well.
It had been a mistake.
Jeong-hoon decided to clean everything up while the opportunity was there.
To cover his tracks, he cut off the loose ends and turned the main instigators who had directly tormented Go Young-in over to the committee.
"Sorry. For dragging you into this too…."
That was the first thing Go Young-in said when he returned to school after being discharged and saw Jeong-hoon.
Go Young-in really was an idiot to the very end.
Jeong-hoon had to lift a hand to his mouth just to hide the corners of his lips threatening to rise.
The one who had extended a helping hand when no one else helped Go Young-in was, in fact, the very source of all this, Son Jeong-hoon.
But Jeong-hoon hadn’t actually done anything himself.
On the contrary, it had looked close enough to helping that nobody found it suspicious.
Not even Go Young-in, the person involved.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇
"You used to go around alone all the time, but not lately, huh? I was waiting forever. Huh? Say something. Unless you’re trying to screw me over!"
Jeong-hoon grabbed him by the collar in a threatening way. He wasn’t using much force—it was meant to scare, not actually choke him—but the contempt underneath it was obvious.
"First, let go of—"
"Fuck, do I look like I’m in the mood for that? It’s you, right? Answer me already. Why the hell are you doing this to me? Bae So-jin, the PD, Yoo In-hyeok that piece of shit—this is all because of you!"
Jeong-hoon slammed Go Young-in against the wall again. Maybe his shoulder hit badly, because Go Young-in frowned faintly, but that was all. He didn’t even manage a proper struggle.
So he really was still a pushover. What had this pushover possibly done?
Ever since Bae So-jin suddenly betrayed this side and ran, things had started to unravel. Back then, Jeong-hoon had only thought of her as a card that got exposed and thrown away. He had plenty more where that came from.
But then Yoo In-hyeok defected too, and even the PD stopped cooperating, and the situation had turned into this mess.
This was already a broadcast with a predetermined winner. It had been made to boost Jeong-hoon. So why? Why had everything been fine until now, only for the blame to suddenly come crashing down on him?
In his head, the conversation with Yoo In-hyeok and the PD’s voice kept replaying on a loop.
"Hey, you piece of shit. That’s not what we agreed on. You said you’d give me screen time too."
"Just finish this broadcast well and the next one’s your turn, hyung. I’m just getting my face out there first, then I’ll make you shine next. Why are you in such a rush?"
"Fuck. Quit spouting bullshit. From the way you’ve been acting all along, you were gonna keep pushing only your own guy and cut me out too."
"That’s not it, I’m telling you."
"Fuck off. From now on, we go separately. I’ll do my thing, you do your fucking thing."
And after all the help they’d gotten from him, they stabbed him in the back like this? No matter how Jeong-hoon thought about it, it was infuriating. And right before Yoo In-hyeok dropped out, it had been even worse. Jeong-hoon had suspected it already, but Yeo In-hyeok had been more insane than he’d imagined.
"You were planning this anyway, weren’t you? You thought I wouldn’t realize you were gonna blow up the group and just debut me alone? Well, congratulations—everything went exactly how you wanted. Go on, do a good job."
"Why are you assuming things on your own? How many times do I have to say that’s not—"
"Shut up. Hey, your friend’s better than you, by the way. I finally get why you’ve always been so creepy, sniffing around in the dark."
"…Fuck, seriously."
"You know you’re a total loser, right? I can’t believe you spend all day searching the internet for comparison posts. It’s fucking disgusting."
Yoo In-hyeok’s mocking laughter was still vivid in his head. Jeong-hoon ground his teeth.
Losing to anyone was bad enough, but losing to Go Young-in was unthinkable. Go Young-in had basically been under his feet this whole time.
The ugly inferiority complex he’d been trying so hard to ignore started crawling back up again.
"You said you’d edit it properly! You know how much my uncle has done for PD Go in the meantime, and you’re acting like this?"
"Yeah. What I was asked to do by your uncle was only the editing. The rest is something you should handle on your own, isn’t it? Do I have to spoon-feed you too?"
"I’m saying this because you were so good to me until now, then suddenly did this. You said you’d make sure nothing would damage my image."
"What a funny little bastard. Even cooking can’t be done properly if you don’t have ingredients to work with. Think of it as noise marketing. At this point, you’re already being overpraised compared to your actual ability, aren’t you? You’re really planning to live your whole life without ever getting hated?"
"There’s a limit to that too, though. Didn’t you monitor the reactions properly? Do you even know how much hate is being posted about us right now?"
"And now you’re throwing a fit even after I helped you. If you hate this so much, then bring me a story that’ll get even more attention."
"Where the hell am I supposed to find something like that?"
"Why not? I’m sure there’s plenty. Oh, and apparently you used to secretly chew gum in school."
"What kind of ridiculous—"
"Maybe you still think this is school, but society and school are different, kid. You really think anyone’s going to listen to you properly when you go around talking like that? Hurry up and get back to set. I’ve already been more lenient than I should’ve been."
Besides, whether the PD was bluffing or actually knew something, he’d brought up Jeong-hoon’s school days. There had been too many things to hide, so he couldn’t just let that pass.
Jeong-hoon needed someone to blame. It wasn’t because he himself had been lacking that things had gone this way. He hadn’t done anything wrong.
And right in front of him now stood the perfect target. The bastard who had caused all of it.
"Go Young-in."
It was because of this bastard that everything had gone to hell.
"It’s all your fault."
Go Young-in, who had been quiet until now, suddenly seized the arm reaching for him. His own hand, which had extended in a halfhearted attempt to block the attack, couldn’t even muster any real strength and trembled violently. He was pretending otherwise, but the violence had clearly been carved into his body.
In his heart, Jeong-hoon sneered at him. Idiot.
"You’re not answering? I’m the one getting dragged through the mud because of you. That’s why I said it. Why won’t you listen? Did you just brush off everything I said for your sake as nonsense? If you’d just listened to me, I wouldn’t even be this pissed off."
Go Young-in slowly lifted his head. The strength in that outstretched hand was pathetic, but his eyes were different.
It was a familiar expression. The same face Go Young-in always wore when he looked at Son Jeong-hoon. Even while trembling in fear, that gaze—like he was staring at something no more important than a bug—had not changed. Jeong-hoon hated those eyes beyond reason.
Go Young-in’s mouth opened slowly.
"Yeah. I did it."
"…What?"
"What you’re thinking right now."
Of course. Just as he’d expected. So it really had been Go Young-in.
Unless someone had interfered in the middle, there was no way everything would have unraveled like this all at once.
At the very least, there was no way the PD could have known about the past unless Go Young-in had told him.
"Why did you do it?"
"I can’t spend my whole life just taking hits."
"Who do you think helped you every time you got beaten up, and now you’re—!"