Tutorial (8) — The Boss That Devours Common Sense

The humming stopped. For five long seconds, a suffocating silence swallowed everything. Then—

“K-Kiiiiiiieeeeee!!!”

The terrified ghost anomaly lunged straight at Senior.

“Whoa! What the hell are you—”

For a split second I thought it was attacking her, but no. The thing was desperately shoving its upper body into the cage Senior had just opened.

“...?”

Why is it doing that?

“There we go, there we go~ In you go, just like that, hmm~?”

Senior didn’t seem bothered at all. She grabbed the anomaly by its legs and shoved it the rest of the way inside with a firm shlup.

Still… stuffing something that used to be human into a bag felt a little much. The look on my face must have given me away, because Senior glanced at me with an understanding smile.

“It’s neat, right~? This thing has spatial compression tech built in, so the inside is actually super spacious~”

“Oh… really?”

“Yep~ I’ll show you later? For now let’s get this friend tucked away first!”

It must have been a tight fit. Senior grunted as she kept pushing the anomaly deeper. While she worked, I lowered my voice and asked the gallery members.

“Boss mob? That thing?”

“Hey, I’m not dead yet, you know?”

These bastards were already treating me like a dead man. I sighed.

“You guys keep bragging about the collective intelligence of the Anomaly Management Gallery. Hurry up and tell me how to beat it.”

“What do you mean there’s no data?”

In short: when the Bureau collapsed, all data on this suspicious boss mob vanished. The only clues would have to come from people who actually fought it head-on, but every single gallery member who met this thing before died without being able to do a damn thing. So there was zero useful information on the board for me.

“Why did it have to be this thing of all things…”

“What fate?”

I decided arguing with these clowns any longer was pointless. I immediately canceled the shared view and posted a new thread.

The gallery had completely lost its mind. And it wasn’t just the gallery.

The barely functioning notification window kept spitting out broken text. Then it started shaking violently like it was caught in an earthquake before cutting out with a sharp pop.

“Is this because of the anomaly too?”

The moment I lifted my head in frustration—

Shiiiiiiiiiii—!!!

From the far end of the hallway, something pitch black began spreading in every direction, advancing toward us.

“S-Senior? That thing—”

“Hmm, looks like the final guest has arrived~?”

As she spoke, Senior pulled out a collapsible baton in her left hand and a handgun in her right.

“Junior~”

“Yes, Senior.”

“It might get dangerous, so you have to stay right behind me, okay~? Got it~?”

“Senior! In front—!”

But the black figure had already closed the distance and was standing directly in front of Senior.

“Hmm? It got this close already~?”

“■■■.”

The distance was too short to swing the baton, so Senior flipped the handgun and tried to smash the creature with the grip. But in that instant—

Thud!

“?!”

The anomaly’s fist punched straight through Senior’s chest and out her back.

It happened in the blink of an eye.

Thump.

“Senior!!!”

I tried to run ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠to her, but my body wouldn’t move.

A warped, off-key humming drifted through the air.

Hmm-hmm-hmm~ Hmm-hmm-hmm~

And in her final moment—

“You’ve finally returned, haven’t you?”

“...What?”

“I missed you so much.”

The spine-chilling voice and the hot breath against my ear were the last things I felt before I lost consciousness.

The moment I opened my eyes, all I saw was a short message saying I had been dragged into another anomaly phenomenon again. The text was so broken I could barely read it, but the meaning was clear enough.

Where… am I?

I was lying in a dark room, covered by what was obviously an old, worn-out blanket.

What the hell happened?

I desperately retraced my memories. I had successfully subdued the ghost anomaly and cleared stage two. After that I was preparing for the tutorial boss fight, but…

Senior…

If I hadn’t seen wrong, Senior’s chest had been punched clean through by that thing.

Is she okay?

It was a blow that would have killed any normal person instantly, but I prayed desperately that Senior had somehow survived. She was the only person who had been consistently kind and gentle to me since I fell into this godforsaken insane world.

For Senior’s sake, I had to get out of here fast.

Staying inside an anomaly phenomenon for too long was never a good idea. One of the gallery members had mentioned in the comments that everyone who fought this anomaly had eventually been eroded inside the phenomenon and died.

The place didn’t seem immediately dangerous, so I tried opening the gallery first. If I could brainstorm with the other members, maybe we could come up with something useful.

But…

Why won’t this open?

The gallery refused to load. The status window was the same. Still, I kept trying without giving up, and finally—

Pop!

I managed to connect to the gallery.

The text was still broken and warped, but maybe we could manage some basic communication if we tried hard enough. Just as a sliver of hope began to rise—

Hmm-hmm-hmm~ Hmm-hmm-hmm~

That skin-crawling humming returned. Then—

Creeeeak.

“!!!”

The door opened and something shaped like a person stepped into the room.

“Huh? Ah, yes…”

It was a woman wearing simple white clothes. But those clothes looked like…

A hanbok… or something similar?

They resembled the skirts and jackets you’d see in historical dramas, yet they were subtly different from the Joseon-era hanbok I remembered. I couldn’t make sense of any of this.

No wonder the others said this thing was pure trolling. How am I supposed to find any clues like this?

The woman knelt gracefully beside me and waited with her eyes gently closed.

The anomaly is watching you?

The anomaly is treating you… I don’t get the middle part, but… as its half-something and wife…?

The word that started with “half” seemed to be the key. It didn’t look hostile, so I gathered my courage and spoke.

“Um…”

“Yes, please speak.”

“Where… am I?”

“······.”

In that instant—

Glug glug glug.

Thick, pitch-black, viscous liquid began pouring from the woman’s head and eyes.

I didn’t need to read the full warning. My body had already instinctively decided that black sludge was extremely dangerous. I shot up and tried to run for the door, but—

Grab!

The woman’s hand clamped down on my arm with monstrous strength. There was no way I could shake it off.

“…Where are you going in such a hurry?”

“Huh?”

“Have you truly… forgotten me?”

I might be dense and have zero dating experience, but even I knew saying “Sorry, who are you?” right now would be a terrible idea.

“Ah, no way! Of course I haven’t forgotten! I was just joking.”

I shouted in a panic. Instantly, the black liquid disappeared without a trace, and only a refreshed-looking woman remained in the room.

“Really now, we haven’t seen each other in so long and yet you play such a cruel prank.”

“Hahaha…”

It worked. But the woman’s wariness hadn’t eased at all.

“Then why were you in such a rush the moment you woke up?”

“Uh…”

If I didn’t answer right away she’d get suspicious…

“I-I just woke up, so I thought I’d get some fresh morning air—”

“Ah, I’m sorry. I must have gotten in your way…”

I finally managed to free myself from her grip.

Phew~

When I stepped outside and checked my wrist, I saw bright red handprints that looked like I’d been tied up with rope. This was clearly not an opponent I could handle with physical force.

And then there was the world itself.

What kind of messed-up place is this…?

The sky was fixed in a permanent sunset, glowing blood-red. Mountains and boulders floated in the air all around it. It was a bizarre landscape that obviously didn’t belong to reality.

So the broken word “half■” was probably…

…Partner?

Does she think I’m her husband?

That raised another question.

That one guy with the weird username definitely said never to do what the anomaly wants…

“I shall serve the meal now.”

“I don’t have much of an appetite, so I’m fine not—”

Glug glug glug glug!

“I-I’ll eat!”

If I refused what the anomaly wanted, it looked like I’d die immediately. But if I obeyed, I’d slowly get eroded and die anyway.

How the hell am I supposed to refuse then?

This was the ultimate troll boss. On top of that, I hadn’t received any manual or contaminated rulebook this time.

What am I supposed to do?

With no other choice, I accepted the tray the anomaly brought out. It was a simple, modest meal. Just to be safe, I asked the status window internally if it was okay.

At least that was a relief. If I didn’t eat, the anomaly kneeling right beside me would probably start pouring black sludge while asking “Why aren’t you eating?”

I forced down a spoonful. But then—

“Hmm.”

Tsk, of all things it had to be bean rice.

As I lifted another spoonful to my mouth, the anomaly suddenly leaned in close without me noticing and whispered right next to my ear.

“Why are you eating rice with chopsticks?”

“Uh, uhh?”

“Didn’t you always use a spoon?”

Did she really have to nitpick every single detail? What kind of obsessive woman was this?

But thanks to that, something clicked.

…Wait a second. Could it be…?

I finally understood the true meaning behind that comment. I swallowed my apology, looked at the anomaly with a cold expression, and said:

“So what?”

“…Pardon?”

“Whether I scoop rice with a spoon or pick it up with chopsticks, what business is it of yours, woman?”

“······.”

The anomaly smiled faintly and opened her mouth.