When Three Nymphs Team Up, Nothing Is Impossible! # 2
When I was little, my dad sent me off to a taekwondo gym with a single piece of advice.
“Ildo, a person should at least be able to protect their own body.”
It was sound advice, but honestly, it never really clicked for me. I mean, how often does a person living in the peaceful 21st century actually need to defend themselves?
Well — a lot more often, as it turned out, after the rifts appeared. These days, you really did need to be able to look after your own hide at minimum.
“Oinoi, you girls have people out there who'd target you, you know? Right?”
I looked at the nymphs. They were all petite, and to anyone's eyes they seemed completely harmless.
But nymphs are special beings. Bad people might well come after them, or they could get caught up in some sudden incident and hurt. Being prepared for that moment with some basic training seemed like a good idea. At least, that's how I saw it.
“Mweh-heh, no mosquito whatsoever can withstand a strike of this Oinoi's electric mosquito swatter…! There exists no weapon more nymph-friendly than this, that is the truth of it…!”
Vwiiiing—
It was spring, but thanks to the warm weather, mosquitoes were already flitting about. Whenever Ang-ang-i and Keongkeongi left the house, this was always how it went — mosquitoes swarming everywhere — and Oinoi was swinging her electric swatter around, picking them off one by one.
“Nymph Secret Technique: Rampant Mosquito Catching!”
Zap—!
With a sizzling pop, the swatter flashed bright. The unlucky victim caught in its grid was a mountain mosquito, the kind that lives mostly in forests and hills — the sort whose bite goes beyond itchy and straight into painful.
“This Coris has never seen such a magnificent weapon before, that is what this Coris is saying…! This Coris also wishes to possess an electric mosquito swatter…! Oinoi, this Coris is very jealous of you, that is what this is…!”
Coris envied Oinoi, and at that, Oinoi thrust her shoulders and chest out proudly and rejoiced with a “That is indeed the case…!”
Something I'd learned since meeting Coris: Oinoi loved showing off her belongings to the other nymphs at every opportunity. Was that a nymph trait, or just an Oinoi trait? I was leaning toward the latter. Coris was far too demure for it, after all.
“Mweh-heh, even this Illinoi, who has merchandised weapons in her time, is thinking that this electric mosquito swatter is a very, very awesome weapon, that is what she is thinking…! Kore Yerim…! A new business idea has come to this Illinoi, that is what has happened…!”
Three nymphs. Even with one line each, that was already three lines' worth of noise. Figuring that if I let this go on I'd never get my own word in, I spoke up.
“Oinoi, did you girls ever get training? Like, for fighting people. I was thinking of taking you to Nonsan for a bit of conditioning. How does that sound?”
And while I was at it, I could look into this guest-instructor role or whatever it was. What I actually wanted right now was combat experience, but teaching someone else had a way of sharpening your own skills, too.
Still — nymphs at a recruit training center. Was there a more mismatched pairing anywhere in the world? But it was a necessary step. Ever since the mechanical-snail game console had come into the yard, Oinoi's activity levels had dropped in a number of ways. If she refused, well, so be it — or so I thought, but Oinoi reacted with surprising enthusiasm.
“Invasive species in this nymph-friendly land…! There are so many, that is the truth of it…! To stand against the invasive species, we nymph sisters must build our strength, that is the case…! This Oinoi wishes to receive training, that is what she is saying…!”
“This Illinoi has swung these honey fists alongside the Apache tribes against the Yankees in the distant past, that is her body's history…. Is she eligible for immediate Master Class enrollment, that is the question…?”
“As long as this Coris can be with her nymph sisters, anything is joyful, that is what this is…! When three or more nymphs gather, anything is possible, that is the truth of it…!”
And so it was settled. Just like that, the nymphs were headed for Nonsan!
There was one thing worrying Oinoi, though.
“The Golden Apple…! Someone must tend to it, that is the truth of it…!”
—Zzji…!
Was Ang-ang-i offering to look after the apple tree? Having Ang-ang-i around made my life that much more comfortable, after all. If he could manage the house for a few days, there'd be nothing to worry about — a slightly regrettable outcome, but a shame regardless.
“This Illinoi is thinking that this Golden Apple tree is terribly impressive, that is what she is thinking…! To grow such a magnificent tree…! As it grows bigger, more and more nymphs will surely come to visit, that is certain…!”
“This Oinoi thinks so too, that is the truth of it…! Master grew that apple tree more beautifully than anyone, that is the case…! Everything this Oinoi knows, she learned from Master…!”
“Ohh, so sister Oinoi studied under a master, that is what happened…?”
“Master was a cool and tall adult nymph, that is the truth of it…!”
A cool and tall adult nymph, huh? Did nymphs even have a concept of adulthood? From what I'd heard, Illinoi was at least two hundred years old. She'd fought alongside the American Indians against the Yankees, after all.
And yet her outward appearance was no different from Oinoi's or Coris's. Coris and Oinoi didn't treat her as an elder in the slightest, either.
“Do nymphs become adults when they get older?”
“Mweh-heh, merely growing old does not make one an adult, that is the truth of it…!”
How philosophical. She had a point, though — age alone didn't make someone an adult. I was twenty-seven, and I certainly didn't feel like one. It felt like my heart had stopped somewhere in my early twenties and never moved on.
What did it even mean to become an adult?
Just then, Seo Yerim, who'd been tapping away at her phone, asked, “Then what does it take for you girls to become adults?”
“That is… honestly, this Oinoi doesn't really know either, that is the truth of it…!”
“Mweh-heh, this Illinoi once listened to the Indians, that is her credential…. To become an adult, one must climb a high mountain and touch the clouds with one's own hand, that is what they say, that is what she is saying…!”
“This Coris heard it from the sisters she once lived with in the old stream water — that eating a legendary flower of flame makes you grow tall and become an adult who can breathe fire, that is what she heard…!”
The methods for achieving adulthood were as varied as could be. Touching a cloud, or eating a flower out of legend. None of them looked remotely easy.
So growing up really isn't a simple thing after all.
“Never thought I'd set foot in Nonsan again in my life.”
Back in the day, I'd skipped actual enlistment by serving as a substitute conscript, hunting rifts instead — but I'd completed the same one-month basic training course at the camp as every regular soldier. Hair buzzed short, locked behind the gates, unable to leave. Ever since then, I hadn't cared much for Nonsan, and I'd figured I'd never have reason to come back. Well, here I was.
Shhk—
I walked into the training camp and addressed the guard post. “Three people. Three-day basic training, please.”
After the rift crisis, the government had rolled out a basic training program that any civilian could join at any time. Once the birth rate fell and the military could no longer maintain troop numbers, they'd scrambled to patch the holes in national defense with whatever policies they could devise. The basic training program was born from the idea of letting civilians of every age and gender build at least a foundation in the short term — and it had turned out surprisingly effective. They taught women and the elderly how to fire a gun, perform CPR, and so on. They even threw in a mountain of volunteer-service credits, or so I heard.
MeTubers came by to try it out and pump out content videos, which made the program famous. Thankfully, nymphs were eligible to participate, too.
A soldier who looked at least five years younger than me guided us inside. “Right this way — you'll be staying in this room.”
A training camp building slated for demolition due to the shrinking youth population, freshly remodeled. A four-person room. A brand-new barracks. Oinoi and the nymphs filed inside.
Before long, Illinoi wrinkled her face.
“She must spend three days living in a place this small, that is the question…? This is extremely nymph-phobic, that is what it is…! Call a lawyer at once, that is the demand…! This place is identical to a holding cell, that is the truth of it…!”
It did resemble a holding cell, honestly. For three days here, you couldn't touch your phone, and cut off from the outside world, outside of eating and sleeping you'd be standing guard or training the whole time.
Soon Coris and Oinoi claimed their spots by the window.
“Mweh-heh, this bed now belongs to Oinoi, that is the truth of it…!”
“This Coris likes the bed by this window, that is what she is saying…!”
“Hye-eek…! This Illinoi has lost the window-side spot, that is what has happened…!”
Three days. I doubted anything serious would happen, but still — I hoped it would go smoothly. It all depended on which instructor we were assigned.
Shhk—
Just then, someone entered the room. A woman in military uniform with her hair tied back.
“Welcome. I am Instructor Jo Gyo-hee, and I will be responsible for your training from here on.”
Her rank was Master Sergeant. She looked barely in her mid-twenties — and a Master Sergeant already? She had to be an awakener. Awakeners who stayed in the military got promoted fast, after all. They were high-value personnel. Of course, fast promotions and generous benefits notwithstanding, almost no awakeners chose to remain in uniform; from what I'd heard, it was mostly F- and E-ranks who enlisted when they wanted a stable career. This woman was probably cut from the same cloth, more or less—
“This Oinoi is Oinoi of the Ditch Water, that is the truth of it…!”
“This is Coris, nymph of the Ice Water, that is what this is…!”
“Illinoi is Illinoi, that is what she is…!”
“Uuuuuuhm….”
A surreal introductions ceremony. Instructor Jo Gyo-hee looked a little flustered. My guess was that these nymph friends of ours were the strangest trainees she'd encountered in her entire career.
“Um, what exactly are these children…?”
Gyo-hee looked at me with a slightly tense face. I gave her a light explanation.
“These kids are drifters. A race called nymphs — not widely known, but think of them as something like elves.”
“Ah—.”
“You must not treat us the same as long-eared invasive species like elves, that is the truth of it…! Also, the instructor's outfit looks extremely like that of a nymph-phobe, that is what it looks like…!”
“As you can see, they don't care much for elves, so be careful about that. Also, Oinoi has some personal trauma, so she dislikes police and soldiers.”
“Ah….”
“For these three days I'll be training alongside them as their guardian anyway, so there's no need to worry too much.”
Only then did the instructor seem to relax. In a world where mishandling a civilian trainee meant the internet and TV both exploding overnight, treating drifters carelessly would only cause problems. It was better for me to keep a close eye on things from the sidelines.
“I'm Ha Ildo, C-rank.”
“Ha Ildo? You wouldn't happen to be the one from the dog-squirrel Keongkeongi's…?”
“Oh, you know me?”
“My little brother just brought home a dog-squirrel from Taecho Village!”
Figures. It felt like Keongkeongi the dog-squirrel was more famous than I was.
Before long, Keongkeongi poked his head out of my shirt pocket.
—Keongkeong…!
Apparently he'd heard his name and decided to make an appearance.
“Kyaaah! Look at those stripes! So you're Keongkeongi! I've only ever seen your photos online!”
The instructor, whom I'd taken for a stern career soldier, turned out to have quite the soft spot for cute things, and she lit up at the sight of Keongkeongi. And so our training began.
Uniform change. The nymphs stood in front of the barracks wearing their strange new military garb, and the sight was deeply surreal.
“From now on, all sentence endings will be standardized to formal declarative style. Understood?”
“Understood, that is the case…!”
“…Understood?”
“Understood, that is the case…!”
Good grief. I turned to the instructor.
“Um, Instructor? Maybe just let that one slide.”
“…Understood. Then your first training will be on surviving a sudden rift outbreak — specifically, how to escape safely if you're stranded inside one.”
The training would take place in a state-of-the-art facility. A cutting-edge indoor set designed to replicate a rift's interior, where we'd be walked through one thing after another. People who'd completed this training had survived anomalous rifts without injury — it was remarkably efficient and practical, more than I'd expected.
“If you are stranded in an anomalous rift, do not panic — your first priority is finding a safe location. The rift suppression team arrives within ten minutes, and those ten minutes are the golden time that directly determines a drifter's survival—”
Zap—!
Just then, a thug clutching a club sprang out from behind the instructor. A rift monster? No — the culprit was an active-duty soldier in a monster costume. Even in the age of the booming 5th Industry, the army was still grinding through its work by burning through manpower, huh.
“Grraaooow. I am a troll.”
“Now, the scenario we'll train for is a rift monster suddenly leaping out at you. The ultra-high-frequency generator app that comes preinstalled on modern phones can temporarily incapacitate a monster—”
“Everyone, beat this nymph-phobic monster to your heart's content, that is the truth of it…!”
“This Illinoi, with her honey fist, has finally met a worthy opponent after so long, that is what has happened…!”
“This Coris hates trolls, that is what this is…!”
The nymphs threw themselves at the thug who'd appeared out of nowhere and started pummeling him with their fists — a thoroughly one-sided beating.
“Hey! Girls! You can't do that!”
I hurriedly pulled the nymphs off and rescued the soldier. Thankfully, he seemed uninjured.
“It didn't hurt much — felt like getting hit with a foam bat — but after taking all those blows, I've resolved to live an honest life from now on.”
“Mweh-heh, the fists of a nymph carry a purifying effect that cleanses the heart like clear ditch water, that is the truth of it…! From now on, stop putting on monster costumes and live honestly, that is the decree…!”
So that was how it was.
And so the afternoon of the first day drew to a close.
“The dinner menu clearly listed a delicious fried egg, that is what was written…! But this is a boiled egg, that is what this is…! This Illinoi is very angry about this illegal and deceptive practice, that is her state…! Call a lawyer here at once, that is the demand…!”
“This Oinoi likes boiled eggs too, that is the truth of it…! A boiled egg together with cider — it is like honey, that is what this is…!”
Dinner ended noisily as ever, and bedtime arrived.
“The dinner menu clearly said fried egg, that is what was writt…snore—.”
Having chattered and run around all day, the nymphs were worn out, and the moment ten o'clock struck, they were out cold. For the record, there was no night guard duty on the first day, apparently.
Ding-dong—.
Just then, a message arrived.
By lucky chance, Ari was near the very training camp I was staying at.
Thk—.
Ari stepped out of her car and asked me, “Senior, now that you've been back to Nonsan in ages — how does it feel?”
“Nothing's changed here.”
“Some things have, actually. Would you like to meet some trainees tomorrow? Kids who just became F-rank awakeners. The real reason I came is because of their medical exams. They say the youngest is fifteen.”
F-rank rookies, huh. When you say F-rank rookies, it sounds like a pack of troublemakers. Then again, that's pretty much what newly awakened kids always were.