Chapter 431: The Lake of Regret (1)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 431: The Lake of Regret (1)
The banquet lasted deep into the night.
By the time it concluded, a full moon hung high in the sky. I found myself walking slowly along one of the Tang Clan's promenades.
Woo Hyuk had remained in the banquet hall, claiming he wanted to eat more. Cheol Jiseon seemed inclined to do the same, so I left them to it and departed alone.
“Whew.”
The night was unusually bright. Lanterns lining the pathways illuminated the surroundings, and the full moon itself seemed to shine with exceptional intensity. The world was as radiant as ever, a stark contrast to the turmoil within me.
I scanned my surroundings with weary eyes and spoke quietly into the night. “Where is the White Ripple Sword?”
From a distance behind me, Tang Duk, who had been following, lifted his head at my question.
-She is drinking.
“Of course she is.”
I knew that woman would be doing just that. A smirk touched my lips as I continued my stroll. “Return to your room and wait. I’ll join you after I’ve walked a little more.”
“…”
Tang Duk fixed me with a glare at the order, but after a moment, he turned and headed towards his quarters. Having that bastard shadow my every step was a problem in itself.
Once I was sure he was gone, I came to a halt. I ran a hand over my arm, a physical gesture accompanying the heavy thoughts swirling in my mind.
The inevitable death the Immortal Healer had spoken of.
Death, huh?
He said my vessel had reached its limit.
No wonder.
So that was why I had been suffering more frequent headaches and mood swings lately. The balance within my body was fracturing, and it was affecting my mental state as well.
The Heaven Destruction Art had stabilized my body, forcing an artificial rebirth. In theory, my vessel would expand once that rebirth was fully achieved. But would that happen before the vessel shattered completely? Furthermore, I was warned that any attempt to increase my qi would cause an immediate rupture. Even training had become a perilous gamble.
The Dishonored Venerable estimated that, at my current rate, I would reach the stage of artificial rebirth in twenty years. Twenty years was unbelievably fast for such a feat. Yet, I was told I only had ten years left. There was a chance I could last until forty, meaning I might have a little more than twenty. But realistically, it was safest to assume I had only a decade.
What were the odds of completing the rebirth in time? And did I even have the luxury of avoiding training when a world-ending disaster loomed? I didn't think so.
Ten years, huh?
I turned the cold reality over and over in my mind. How long until the war began? History had already changed; events were unfolding faster than they had in my previous life. I had to factor that in. My plans needed adjustment.
Was there any way to grow stronger more quickly? I supposed I could search for rare herbs and hidden treasures scattered across the world. After gaining a bit more strength, I would need to destabilize the Murim Alliance. I had to accomplish all of that within five years. The following five years would then be dedicated to the war itself.
“Haha.”
A loud laugh escaped me at the thought. I was always the one with perfect, meticulous plans, yet problems had a way of surfacing unexpectedly. Not everything would go my way. My death was proof of that.
“Not good.”
I wasn't afraid of death. I had always known something like this could happen. I was aware that tampering with the flow of time would invite unforeseen consequences. Knowing it intellectually, however, was different from facing the reality head-on. Now that I was, my mind was flooded with thoughts.
The Immortal Healer said he wouldn't give me the medicine. He claimed the medicine would only extend my life for ten years. Did that mean I could die tomorrow without it? Perhaps not tomorrow, but within a year? Half a year? Maybe even a month if I was unlucky? It wasn't the worst outcome, but I felt no joy at my approaching end.
The fact that I ran into the Immortal Healer here…
That was what I felt grateful for. Not even the Dishonored Venerable had detected a problem with my body. He was a martial artist, not a physician. It was unlikely he had noticed the deterioration of my vessel.
…Well, maybe he would have made me train even if he knew.
Given that crazy old man's personality, it was possible. But I liked to believe even he wouldn't go that far.
This encounter was, in a way, a miracle. A coincidence that I met the Immortal Healer here, and a miracle that he examined me. Furthermore, the fact that he could concoct a medicine to prolong my life was another miracle.
He said he wouldn't give it to me. The look in his eyes told me he was serious, and he wasn't the type to change his mind easily.
But it didn't matter.
My gaze grew cold, mirroring the resolve hardening in my heart. Despite his rude tone and attitude, the Immortal Healer was a considerate man. I could tell, even after meeting him again after so many years. But that wasn't all.
You have too many weaknesses, Immortal Healer.
He possessed a critical vulnerability: Zhuge Hyuk. I had learned one thing during my time with him back at the Gu Clan—the Immortal Healer wandered the Central Plains because of Zhuge Hyuk. I didn't know the exact reason, but I was certain of the connection. What was his goal? I didn't know, but I had my suspicions, and each one was a potential weakness. Even if my guesses were wrong, Zhuge Hyuk himself was the Healer's weakness. Knowing that, it wouldn't be difficult for me to exploit it.
“…”
I was even surprising myself with how cold I was being. Was it because Zhuge Hyuk would play a significant role in the coming disasters?
No.
It wasn't necessarily that. It was simply because I didn't consider the Immortal Healer or Zhuge Hyuk particularly important in my life. I was always prepared to discard them.
A dense, disgusting feeling rose in my throat, threatening to make me vomit. I suppressed the guilt and continued walking.
Step.
As I walked, I pondered. What was truly important, then? Was my own death important to me?
Not really.
I felt no deep attachment to this life. I had felt that way ever since I regressed. A second chance at life? But what for? To atone for the sins of my past life?
Haha…
How pointless. Even if I atoned for past sins in this life, would it truly count? It would be mere self-satisfaction. A delusional form of penance.
Then why was I choosing to live this life, despite my lack of attachment? I didn't need to think long. I already knew the reason.
“Young Master Gu?”
“…”
A voice, shocked, called out to me. It was Wi Seol-Ah. Why was she here? I looked around and realized I had wandered to the building where she was staying.
Wait, if Wi Seol-Ah is here…
I turned my head slightly. Beside her, Namgung Bi-ah was seated, her gaze fixed on me. I’d heard they were sharing quarters.
Namgung Bi-ah’s eyes widened abruptly after staring at me for a moment. Wi Seol-Ah reacted similarly.
“…Young Master Gu? Did something happen…?”
Both girls approached me, their expressions etched with worry. I offered a bitter smile. I was truly terrible at hiding my feelings. Getting caught like this, every time. I really didn't want people to notice.
“It’s nothing.”
“…You're lying.”
Namgung Bi-ah saw right through me. Even so, there was nothing she could do. I must have come here subconsciously while walking. My instincts had led me here, even as my mind wandered. What a joke.
Both girls seemed to have sensed something strange about my condition. To be fair, it was understandable; my sudden, unannounced appearance was unusual.
How could I describe what I was feeling? I thought for a moment, but found no words. So, I decided to voice what was in my heart.
“I just wanted to see you.”
“…!”
“That’s why I came here.”
A sudden, simple desire to see them. That was the only explanation I could offer.
I took a step closer to the girls, who were staring at me in shock. They were stiff as statues. Smirking at the sight, I reached out.
Swoop.
“…!”
“Ah…!”
I pulled them towards me, carefully but swiftly. There was a moment of instant resistance, but then they relaxed and leaned into the embrace. Their hair swayed, brushing against my nose. The scent of their skin brought a faint warmth to my chest.
They would have been justified in saying something, questioning my sudden action, but they remained silent. Were they that shocked? Just as I began to feel a little guilty,
Swish.
A hand began to carefully rub my back. It seemed they wanted to soothe me first, rather than demand answers. I closed my eyes at the sensation.
They're so small.
I felt both of their bodies within my arms. They were slender and slight. Despite the powerful qi they possessed, the two girls felt small and soft. Being comforted by them for no reason left me with a complicated mix of emotions.
And then, I thought about the reason I wanted to prolong this life.
Oh…
I realized it then. The peace the Qinghai Sword had spoken to me about. I remembered the old man looking at me with his wrinkled eyes, asking what my peace was. I couldn't answer then, but now I understood.
This must be my peace.
To bring peace to those who had sacrificed their lives for me. To prolong the peace of the girls I held in my arms. To live for those who cared about me, even when I failed to reciprocate fully. If I could achieve that, then this life would be satisfactory.
Ten years, was it? I would end the war within that time.
Even if I can’t, I will.
I’ll do it no matter what.
I had already discarded the option of giving up. To achieve this goal, I was willing to sacrifice everything and become anything.
Clench.
I held them tighter and buried my face in their shoulders. A resolve solidified within me.
I can do it.
I won’t fall.
I repeated it to myself, a mantra against the darkness.
The next day, I went to confront the Poison King as soon as morning arrived.
“I apologize for calling on you so early, my Lord.”
It was around the time others began their morning training. Most people probably hadn't even eaten breakfast yet. The Poison King looked at me with a thin, assessing gaze. I spoke again, a slight smile on my lips.
“The lake we discussed last time. May I see it now?”