Trapping the Sneaky Laser Panda

“Hmm…”

At first glance, this Laser Panda looked far from ordinary.

Its tiny size was one thing, but strolling around inside the smartphone's world? That was an insane ability on its own.

No doubt about it—this was an anomaly.

Poke poke.

To test its reaction, I poked its head first.

Completely surrounded by apps on all sides, the panda helplessly fell victim to my finger pokes.

It was so small that I poked extra gently, worried I might squish it or something.

No injuries.

There were no visible issues on the Laser Panda's body.

Still, it flinched in surprise, so it must feel the touch somehow…

Vibrations transmit when I tap, I guess.

After a quick finger-poking discipline session, I watched how it'd react.

By the book, I should've reported the weird thing on the phone screen to Han A-young right away.

But…

I'm booored…

I was bored!

So during this precious smartphone time, I figured I'd play with the Laser Panda first, then report it.

The Laser Panda stood still, seemingly pondering what to do about my pokes.

Then it raised both arms high.

Like it was roaring grrrrawr or something—a total threat pose.

“Pfft…”

If a real-life Laser Panda struck that pose, it might've been a little intimidating.

But at pixel size? It didn't scare me at all.

If anything…

So cuuute~

It was just adorable.

If they turned that into an ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠emoticon set, it'd probably top the KakaoTalk teen charts easy.

Any way to talk to it?

We'd met now, and it didn't seem ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠to affect the real world anyway, so chatting sounded fun.

I thought for a sec, then pulled up the smartphone keyboard.

And typed what I wanted to say.

Tap tap.

Now fully adapted to my tiny fingers, my smartphone typing speed was near-perfect!

The word appeared in a flash.

“…”

The Laser Panda froze, like it could see the word.

But no other reaction…

Sip, English maybe?

I quickly switched to the Korean/English keyboard and unleashed my Nemo Block command-line English skills.

“…”

But despite my efforts, no reply from the panda.

Oh well~

I'd shown some goodwill, but if it wouldn't respond, I'd have to tell Han A-young.

I left that ultimatum and got up from the sofa.

Right then—

“Ehh…”

The Laser Panda knew Korean after all—it'd ignored me until I threatened to snitch, then panicked with a reply.

Deduct two points in my mind, and I plopped back on the sofa.

“Huh? Angel? Got something to say?”

Han A-young asked late, but I had a full hour planned for Laser Panda fun, so I shook my head.

“Nope~ Just stood up to stretch a bit.”

“Ah… Gotta stretch sometimes, yeah.”

Good, she bought it and nodded, going back to whatever she was doing.

Cookies on her desk—she must be writing the ambrosia report.

Hoping the Agency nails mass production, I tried chatting with the Laser Panda.

“Ooo…”

I tossed a test problem its way.

“Wooow…!”

Answered like a calculator—instantly.

I didn't even know the answer myself, but that speed screamed legit.

I swallowed hard.

“What’s that mean…”

The Laser Panda started rambling weird English.

Guess "RatPT" was its sore spot.

Watching the Laser Panda rage and glitch out was hilarious.

“Hehe…”

I giggled, and before I knew it, smartphone return time loomed.

Regrettable, but farewell time.

I tapped out a goodbye chat.

It got my meaning—its face went ghost white.

Never knew Laser Panda faces could pale like that.

“What…? You know me?”

“Middle school syndrome…”

World conquest? Should've outgrown that in junior high.

“Hmm…”

Its expression screamed bad intentions.

Animals with naughty thoughts deserve punishment.

I hopped off the sofa and went to Han A-young.

“Sis.”

“Yeah? What's up, Angel?”

“Phone's acting weird~”

At "phone weird," she rushed over.

I zoomed in on the trapped Laser Panda for her.

She examined it closely, then beamed and petted my head.

“Our Angel caught this?”

“Yup, blocked its path and it couldn't do anything~”

“Hehe, never seen that trick before.”

Eh…?

Looks like Han A-young already knew about this Laser Panda.

So then…

“Yeah, this panda's Anomaly-404. Know the 404 NOT FOUND error code?”

“Yup, that super annoying one~”

“Right, that's its nickname. Slips away and vanishes whenever it gets a chance.”

“Aha…”

“Sealed it in a phone before, but it escaped again. Must've left a dummy—numbers looked fine.”

Hmm…

So this thing's super dangerous, right?

Seems crazy smart.

And hostile to humans too.

A brainiac like that loose in the Agency? Trouble waiting to happen…

“It wanted to escape together… Isn't that risky~?”

Han A-young grinned, loud enough for the panda to hear.

“No worries. It's powerful, but the Agency control AI's way stronger.”

“If it tries anything here, control AI blocks it instantly.”

True enough—the chatty panda went silent.

“Plus, we've got a secret weapon against it.”

“Secret weapon~?”

She whispered in my ear.

Shiritori ending in -nium or -lium.

Super childish method—doubted it'd work.

But worth a shot.

I summoned the keyboard with a finger, and the Laser Panda sensed doom, freaking out.

I grinned wide and typed the word Han A-young taught me.

No idea if it was real, but if she said so, it counts!

The Laser Panda's face stiffened instantly.

Then it started lagging hard, movements stuttering like a glitchy game.

“Hmmm…”

Even this mighty AI couldn't beat that!

Spinning in circles like an elephant's trunk, it soon keeled over.

I poked the downed Laser Panda to check if it was okay, and Han A-young came over to pet my head.

“Good job, Angel. You're the smart angel who beat an AI~”

“Hehe…”