A Heart Without Malady
The physicians finished settling their nighttime consultation fees and hurried out of the abandoned warehouse. Once their retreating figures had vanished completely, Mathias lifted Odeliana into his arms once more.
“I was thinking of letting you rest sitting down.”
“Rest in my arms, Master. The floor is filthy.”
“That must be tiring for you.”
“Not in the slightest.”
Mathias’s resolve was unshakable—he would not set Odeliana down on the dirty floor even if it killed him. After the way he had fussed during the examination to keep her body from touching the ground, it was unlikely he would suddenly become compliant now. Besides, his embrace was so warm and comfortable that she decided not to argue.
“……Why did they bother giving me medicine for the heart?”
“They may simply believe the misdiagnosis that you suffer from heart disease.”
The psychiatric medication was understandable. When she had first opened her eyes in this body and seen that Odeliana was already branded as a madwoman, she had suspected the original Odeliana might truly have suffered from some mental affliction.
The contraceptives and sleeping pills were also prescriptions she could more or less accept. But the heart medicine felt especially out of place among all the others.
‘Treating a heart patient like that?’
The people who called themselves Odeliana’s parents had locked away a patient whose illness could erupt at any moment in a remote mountain village, confined her in a contaminated space, and even shielded the servants who abused her. Was this truly the attitude of people concerned enough to administer heart medicine?
The servants had treated her not as a patient requiring meticulous care, but as nothing more than a cumbersome obstacle. At the time she had only known about the inconvenient limp in one leg, so she had not thought much of it, but looking back now, everything felt deeply wrong.
If this body died, the ones in the greatest trouble would be the maids, including Adela. Yet they had thrown a heart patient sensitive to temperature into a place where the wind howled freely, without even a single blanket. On top of that, they had fed her such meager meals that even a healthy person would fall ill.
Nothing was more fatal to a heart patient than malnutrition, yet she had been in a state of nutritional deficiency for a long time. The fact that she was even alive bordered on miraculous, and that alone was deeply suspicious.
“Whatever the reason, it is fortunate that there is nothing wrong with your body.”
“……Yes, it is.”
“By the way, why did you purchase this abandoned warehouse in the first place?”
“I couldn’t possibly buy a proper building with the money I got from selling the gift the Lord of Anatolia gave me. I needed a place of my own to hide. The only building I could afford was this warehouse.”
“A hiding place?”
“You never know. There’s no guarantee the Grusewald ducal house is safe for me. There might come a moment when I need to flee. And I also need somewhere to hide my money right now.”
“You’re planning to leave.”
“You already know this isn’t a place I can stay for long.”
After all, a life of confinement was no different now than it had been before. This was not a place to remain for long.
“The moment you pass the knight examination, we’ll leave. There are too many restrictions here in every way. Once I realized my family has no goodwill toward me, there was no reason to stay any longer.”
“Have you decided where we will go?”
“Yes. I have a plan, so don’t worry about it and just focus on preparing for the knight exam. I’ll take care of everything.”
‘There’s something he’s not telling me. What’s certain is that this place isn’t entirely safe…… I need to make Mathias a knight and leave as soon as possible.’
There were more than one or two suspicious points, but she decided to think about them later. For now, it was enough to take comfort in the fact that this body had no chronic illness.
“Let’s go back.”
* * *
Odeliana, who returned home late, did not wake until the sun had climbed high into the sky. Mathias, who had brought lunch at the perfect time, helped her sit up and lean against the headboard, then brought over a small table and placed a square tray of food on it.
“Good morning—or rather, good afternoon, Master.”
She remembered falling asleep in his arms while riding a horse after leaving the warehouse. Everything after that was a blank.
“Did you change my clothes?”
“Yes. I couldn’t leave you in your outdoor clothes on the bed.”
“And you tidied the bedding as well?”
Mathias nodded with perfect composure.
“Since we snuck out, I thought asking another maid for help might raise suspicion, so I handled everything myself.”
“You must have had a hard time. Thank you for your trouble.”
“Are you not bothered at all?”
“About what?”
“I changed your clothes as well. I saw your bare body.”
Odeliana tilted her head.
“Why would that matter?”
“……”
“You only changed my clothes.”
Ever since her mercenary days, she had shared group lodgings as a matter of course, and there had been times when she inevitably had to show her bare body—whether treating injuries or bathing in a lake. Being a woman had rarely granted her any special treatment.
The only time she had felt ashamed of revealing her naked body was when she had shared a bed with Joslyn. Showing her bare skin, without a single thread covering her, to someone she loved had indeed felt different. Her heart had pounded as if it would burst, and a burning heat had wrapped around her entire body. She had realized then that the feeling of being thrown into a furnace was excitement.
But that had only lasted a moment.
‘Thinking back now, it wasn’t particularly good either.’
Had that first night been ecstatic? She did not know. The moment she had given herself to him had certainly been happy, but when she thought about whether it had been a dizzying night soaked in excitement, it did not seem so. Perhaps their physical compatibility had simply not matched. She had only enjoyed the fact that she alone possessed his affection.
“How adorable. Were you thinking about seeing my bare body all day?”
“……”
“What does it matter if you saw this unsightly body?”
Even as she spoke, Odeliana glanced inside the thin slip she was wearing.
‘At least the basic frame…… is better than my previous body.’
She was undeniably thin from lack of food, but the important parts were properly in place. If she gained a little weight, she might develop quite a sensual figure…… Even so, she looked terrible right now. There was no way a man who remained unmoved even when surrounded by women with voluptuous bodies would react to something like this.
“Don’t worry about it. I’m not bothered in the slightest.”
Mathias’s expression turned displeased.
“I’ve felt this for a while now, but you are far too defenseless.”
“Me?”
“Most people would not let something like this pass so easily.”
At his rather sulky reply, Odeliana barely managed to suppress the laughter that threatened to burst out.
“If I were to feel ashamed in front of a child like you, or scold you for seeing my bare body, then what?”
“……”
“Nothing happened.”
Odeliana began eating with perfect composure. Mathias watched her chewing on a piece of freshly baked bread with a look of mild annoyance, then let out a short sigh and pushed a cup of freshly warmed milk toward her.
“Are you sulking because I treated you like a child? But it can’t be helped. You’re still young.”
“Not for much longer.”
“Is that so? You still have a full four years until adulthood.”
“You act as if you’re a complete adult yourself, even though the age gap isn’t that large.”
“Five years is quite a difference, little one.”
“……Please don’t call me that.”
His tone was rather imperious, and Odeliana swallowed her laughter. She thought she should stop teasing him and focus on her meal, but his sulky face was so cute that laughter kept escaping her. A gaze that was unusually sharp for him turned toward her. He lifted his chin arrogantly.
“I am not as naive as you seem to think, Master. Rather, you should know that I am the one showing restraint.”
“Restraint? About what?”
His long fingers closed the distance in an instant. Smooth, outstretched fingers touched the thin shoulder strap. The touch gliding gently over her collarbone was soft and unhurried. Odeliana let out a small sound through her nose and stared at his pretty fingers.
“Yes. This is the age when one naturally takes interest in a woman’s body.”
“……”
“Even so, I am admirably holding myself back. If it were you, tearing off this shoulder strap I’m holding and laying me beneath you would be nothing.”
Odeliana set down the fork and knife she had been holding and wiped her mouth with the napkin beside her. Then she caught the hand hovering over her shoulder and clasped it in both of hers.
“But you won’t do that.”
“……”
“You’re not that kind of shameless person.”
“Who knows. If I desired you so desperately that I could no longer control my reason, what would you do then?”
“……”
“I cannot make any promises.”
Odeliana laughed softly. There was no way Mathias would desire her, but if, by some impossible chance, such a situation arose, there was only one answer.
“If you still want me even after you come of age, I’ll give myself to you.”
“……”
“If you’re willing to give me the world, how could I not give you this one body?”
“Surely you don’t think I would only want your shell. If I decided to have you, I would have to take even the core inside to be satisfied.”
“That is beyond my authority, so it depends on your efforts.”
Odeliana’s other hand caressed his chin. At the touch that scratched his jaw as if petting a puppy, his throat bobbed.
“Try to make me love you. I won’t refuse that much effort.”
“Ah.”
A neat smile spread across Mathias’s lips. He kissed the back of her hand, his eyes gleaming with a cool light.
“You must take responsibility for those words.”