Chapter 68
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 68
Chapter Title: Ogre Raid
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An ogre had appeared.
The guild was in a state of emergency.
"An ogre's blocking the road?"
"Yeah, you barbarian shit. They say the Avnel caravan got fucked up bad."
Kobson, sitting across from me, said it matter-of-factly. He tore into some jerky like it was no big deal, casually chatting away. He followed it up with a swig of beer.
Come to think of it, Avnel caravan—that was the name of the merchant group I'd hitched a ride with on my way to Isvant.
They'd even tried to scout me.
It was back when we'd fended off bandits on the road to Isvant.
"Fucked up? You mean they all got wiped out?"
"Nah, just eight wagons headed to Baron Todens' territory. But that's still a massive loss. More than twenty dead, they say."
"Fuck, that's scary as shit. A total massacre."
Twenty people—that was a huge number.
If I'd gone with them, I might've been one of those twenty, turned to paste by an ogre punch. Just thinking about it gave me chills. I rubbed my arms. Life's all about timing and connections, fuck. Escort jobs are shit anyway. I won't even look at them from now on.
"So that's why the guild's such a madhouse..."
The guild was even busier than usual. People running around, yelling, tripping over each other, and picking friendly fights. Seeing it this lively at a time like this meant something big had definitely gone down.
"An ogre, huh."
Ogre.
Typical massive, insanely strong monsters with destructive tendencies.
They're seriously dangerous. Huge bodies backed by rippling muscles, wrapped in thick fat like natural armor. Born warriors and destruction addicts.
They lord over most other monsters with that raw power. Ferocious as hell, smashing anything that pisses them off. Natural-born thugs. When they rage, nothing's left standing. Who the fuck could tank a muscle giant's tantrum?
Show up in a remote village once, and it's boom—reduced to rubble. Even if the village militia drives it off, they lose so many young men they decline anyway.
One popping up out of nowhere during a trade run? Of course people got wrecked.
To take one down, you need at least mages or mana-using warriors, but last I checked, Avnel didn't have any like that. Talk about bad luck.
"Why the hell would one show up out of nowhere? First I've heard of ogres around here."
"Like we'd know what monsters think? Maybe it came down from the mountains looking for its mom. Think like a monster, barbarian. Your wild instincts might help."
"No clue."
Still, powerful large monsters like that rarely show up near big cities full of people. They prefer holing up deep in mountains or forests, avoiding pointless fights with humans. They know swarms of hunters come if they kill too many.
Something special must've drawn it out. Beats me.
I'm no monster ecologist.
My knowledge comes from library books I borrowed in spare time or rumors from adventurers.
"Anyway, Avnel caravan, Isvant lord, and the guild all put up bounties. Huge amounts... Every adventurer in the area will swarm it. So, what do you say? Join me?"
Kobson invited me to the subjugation team. I shook my head.
"You drunk already? Lay off the beer."
"This ain't enough to get me buzzed."
What, us taking down an ogre? Craziest shithead. Strongest monster I've seen was a cockatrice, and to an ogre, that chicken-head's just a post-meal snack.
Kobson chugged more beer, slamming the mug on the table with a thud.
"Without courage, a barbarian's just a corpse. Fighting stronger foes—that's your creed, ain't it?"
"Dunno where you heard that crap, but I got no religion, and barbarians being brave is bullshit prejudice. And stop calling me barbarian, you acne-faced fuck."
I pointed at his skin.
"Why deny it? Come on, join up. Base pay's 1 silver just for signing on. 2 silver bonus if we win. Rare chance. And what? Acne?"
"Yeah, you acne fuck. Earn some money and fix your skin."
"Hahaha. Damn it."
Kobson laughed awkwardly, running his fingers over his face. That's why it's getting worse—keep touching it bare-handed. I didn't point that out.
"...Already dozens signed up. Even an ogre can't survive that many. Sure, some'll die, but us? Safety in numbers."
Fair point. No matter how strong, no monster survives a human horde. That's our species. Like ants overwhelming lone predators with sheer numbers.
His pitch made sense. 1 silver base, bonus on success... Lots of adventurers means shared risk.
Tempting.
"And this is a secret..."
"Secret?"
Kobson leaned in, whispering.
"Don't freak out. Listen—the Isvant lady herself is joining to lead the subjugation."
"Isvant lady? Who's that?"
"The lord's daughter, you barbarian shit. You don't know that?"
"Fuck, how would I?"
Never even seen the lord's face. Wild how this guy picks up all this. Must be from wandering everywhere. Wide network or good intel. Weird dude.
"Always comes up when adventurers talk city strongest. You serious?"
"City strongest? The lady's that tough?"
News to me adventurers rank city top dogs. They chat without me? I got no friends?
"Yeah, trained in mana cultivation and greatsword arts since kid. Super strong, they say. With her, even safer. And best part..."
Kobson paused, dreamy-eyed.
"She's drop-dead gorgeous."
"Knew it, you perv."
"One look and I'd die happy."
Bachelor Kobson special: loves that shit.
"Dream on. Your skin kills it stone dead."
"Think I'm chasing romance? Just wanna see her face. All rumors, never seen her."
"What, if she's hot, you'll deepen your voice?"
"When did I ever?"
You do it all the time, fuck.
Kobson suddenly fidgeted, glancing behind me.
Then cautiously asked.
"Anyway... who's the lady behind you?"
"Huh?"
Claudy, who'd been silently listening to our chat, placed a hand on my head and started petting. Kobson stared at my face like, what the fuck?
"Oh, Claudy?"
"Claudy? The beauty's name?"
Kobson yelped in surprise. Claudy greeted him.
"Hi? I'm Claudy."
"A-ah. Y-yes. Nice to meet you. Kobson."
"Don't deepen your voice, fucker."
"When did I—"
You just did, asshole. He fidgeted more, then asked.
"So, what's your relationship?"
Me and Claudy's relationship. I craned my neck to look up at her. She looked down at me. Felt good. I grinned.
"Loving couple."
"What?!"
Kobson jumped.
Honestly, I'm shocked too. Hyper fuckup like me with perfect woman like Claudy? Unimaginable, but real. Deep satisfaction and superiority swelled inside.
I puffed my shoulders like mountains, flaunting my manhood at Kobson. Like a peacock fanning its tail.
"Can't... believe it."
"What's not to believe?"
"A barbarian like you with a girlfriend like that...?"
Claudy, still petting my head, chimed in.
"Hmm~ Katt's a great guy."
"Heh... Claudy, you're the hottest too."
"Hehe, thanks."
"I'm more thankful. Ahh, that tickles my ear."
"Here? This spot good?"
"Gah! Ah, hold on!"
I flirted with Claudy.
"Unbelievable."
Kobson dropped his jerky.
"Heh... Get yourself a girlfriend sometime."
"..."
Anyway, the ogre. Kobson's talk piqued my interest. Never seen one myself. But ageless Claudy probably has, a few times.
"Hey Claudy, ever fought an ogre?"
"Desert ogres, yeah, caught a few."
"Desert ogres? What're those?"
Palette swap?
"Mm... Desert dwellers? Big and quick. Raid oases sometimes, so hunted plenty."
"Plenty? How tough?"
She explained casually, like showing how to prep carrots.
"Eh~ Not hard. Shoot arrows to distract, slip behind, slash the ankle. Then spear the carotid on the fallen one. Done."
"Holy shit."
What's her level?
No sense.
"Katt, sounds fun. Wanna see local ogres too. I'll protect you, okay?"
"Nah, don't need protecting... I'd rather guard you, but that's impossible. Anyway, if you say so."
"Yay, thanks!"
Decided like a neighborhood stroll. But with crowds, Claudy, and Isvant noble lady? Solid mid-tier quest overall.
Big event like this skyrockets rep. Time to hit D-rank. From D, guild gives bank accounts. Higher ranks, better perks.
F-ranks get nothing, ignored. E has minor protections. D means core member status, real benefits from built cred.
Takes years F to E, more to D.
"Yo Kobson, I'm in. Let's go."
"..."
"Let's go?"
"Fuck. Fine, let's sign up."
We applied for the subjugation team. Felt like they took most E+ without issue. Results tonight, so time to kill.
"See ya tonight, Kobson. Bye."
I waved to Kobson.
Then took Claudy's hand with that same hand.
"Claudy, wanna eat anything?"
"Eat?"
"No no no, not that. Let's grab food."
"Hehe, what were you thinking?"
Ah, heart fluttering.
So Claudy and I wandered the city like tourists.
Couples gotta do normal dates, not just sex.