Chapter 6
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 6
Chapter Title: Kobold Hunt
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I gripped my sword tightly and scanned the surroundings. Kobolds had an ant-like ecology. Besides the Kobold Workers, there were superior specimens called Kobold Warriors. I looked for one, but it seemed there was no leader specimen in sight.
That was a relief, at least.
It was a bit odd that these dumb kobolds were pulling this off without anyone ordering them. But even people smarter than kobolds did stupid shit like this all the time, so it wasn't a big deal. Whether someone told them to do it or they decided on their own, who the hell cared? No need to sweat the small stuff.
Come to think of it, maybe that hooded kobold I killed earlier was the leader? Man, my instincts were scary good.
Having roughly mapped out escape routes and confirmed no leader, I picked up a nearby stone and hurled it full-force at the head of a kobold messing around in the mud.
"Magic Bolt!"
Thwack.
My Magic Bolt connected.
Stones were historically the second-most powerful weapon after arrows, in my humble opinion. My full-force throw packed power equal to a basic attack spell from a first-circle mage. It was the simplest and most effective attack, so I'd honed my throwing skills whenever I could. I'd even played baseball back in the day.
Kyureeeh!
The kobold whose skull took a direct hit wailed in all directions before collapsing.
As it screamed, the surrounding kobolds got distracted and turned that way. Seizing the moment before they noticed me, I charged straight at their idol.
"Die, you rat bastards!"
One kobold finally spotted me, baring its teeth and turning toward me—but my accelerating full-power soccer kick had already slammed deep into its back.
Kyurk!
It spewed black blood and flew crashing into the idol.
Kyu! Kyusat! Kyusasat!
Kyusatkyusat!
Kyusaaaaah!
The panicked kobolds chattered among themselves before rushing at me. But these punks couldn't stop the human tank, Kim Katt. I grabbed the leg of the half-dead kobold that had smashed into the idol and spun it into a giant swing.
"Trash!"
The charging kobolds flew like bowling pins. Satisfied with the giant swing, I hurled the poor kobold I'd been holding at the others. It rocketed like a missile, colliding with another and rolling across the ground.
"Nun!"
At my signal, Elise hurled an oil flask at the idol. Crash! It shattered, oil splashing everywhere, followed by a low prayer chant.
"With the light, He comes unto us!!!"
What a powerful prayer.
"Light Bolt!"
Boom!
The flying orb of light hit the oil, igniting a small explosion as flames erupted.
Wait, wasn't that skill light-based? I'd thought it was pure light attribute. Before the idol fully burned, I used my sword to chop the wooden pole that had held the flag, toppling it.
Kyu, kyusat...!
The kobolds' reaction was pure horror.
Kyusaaaaaaaah!!!
They screamed as if their mother had been bisected, charging at me in rage. This assault was far more ferocious than before.
Like they were in their own dungeon territory, the kobolds—steaming mad from the tops of their heads—seemed to have forgotten this was open ground, not their cave. I found the sight hilarious.
"You can't beat me."
Weakling Contempt.
On.
I was the ultimate alpha male, growing infinitely stronger against the weak.
Debuffs kicked in against superiors, but buffs against inferiors. That was my self-hypnosis. It let me lord over these frail punks with courage! That was weakling contempt! Adventurers who looked down on weaker foes died early! So at least against the weak, I'd be the proud Kim Katt!!!
Kyusat!
I fed my sole to the face of the lead charger.
Kwang!
Unable to withstand its own momentum, its neck snapped, and it flew backward. I followed with a horizontal slash to the next one's shoulder. Confirming its upper body half-severed and collapsing, I sheathed my sword for a frontal thrust.
Puk!
I grabbed the jaw of the kobold with its carotid severed and flung it forward.
Kyusaak...!
It was a civilian massacre.
Easier than expected. I'd thought handling five at once would be my limit, but I'd overestimated them out of worry.
But this wasn't my strength; they were just weak.
Kyuwat!
One leaped to cling to me, but my uppercut shattered its balls, sending it into convulsions as it crashed down. Climax or seizure? No difference to me.
"It's over."
I crushed the head of the one crawling on the ground to finish it.
In seconds, five kobolds were wrecked by my hand. No need to fear punks half my height. Fuck tactics—overwhelm with size and power. I rampaged like a savage beast.
Stress relief after ages. People should only fight weaker things. That was human nature.
"Haha! Die, all of you!"
I swung my sword wide, slicing another.
This wasn't their nest. It was wide open. Still daytime, bright everywhere, no kobolds dropping from above.
No encirclement risk, plenty of space for escape routes. Totally different from an ant-cave dungeon.
Those who ignored that were just cannon fodder, worthless.
I gleefully smashed kobolds. Kicked with feet, punched, slashed with sword, swung by legs—merciless. I'd nearly died in a kobold cave once, fueling my rage.
I unleashed it raw.
They turned to corpses before me, one by one.
"Teyaaaaah!"
I shouted in ecstasy. The area was piled with kobold bodies.
"Mr. Katt. This side is cleared."
As I bellowed in excitement for a while, Elise's voice came.
"Huh? Already?"
Having slit the last kobold's throat, I looked at Elise and was stunned.
"Holy shit..."
Elise had turned the spot into a fresh mountain meat market on the spot.
So perfect, it just needed a waiter taking orders... No. Around Elise, ten kobolds with shattered skulls and bulging eyes twitched on the ground, brains leaking as their heads were smashed down.
A perfect slaughterhouse.
She'd turned their merry party into hell in a snap.
Demonic talent.
"Sister, your skills are impressive! I'm amazed!"
I was genuinely impressed. Checking the bodies, all had crushed skulls—likely one-shotted. Maybe I should switch to blunt weapons. Swords were tricky anyway.
Smashing over slashing or stabbing might suit me better.
"Hehehe... You're the same, Mr. Katt."
Elise smiled shyly, drawing her dagger again. They said in Seoul you get your nose cut off if you sleep—here, she just sliced the noses off crawling kobolds. Terrifying faith.
"Need a hand?"
I squatted beside her, nose-slicing in progress, and asked.
"No, thank you. This is something I must do myself. But I appreciate the offer."
"I see."
"More importantly, Mr. Katt."
"Yes?"
"Blood from your ear..."
Touching my ear, blood smeared my palm. Probably from a scratch by one that climbed my back in the fray. Wound on the side of my head above the ear. Shit, bleeding a lot.
"Wh-what the fuck! Blood! Blood! Fucking tons of it!"
"Hold still."
Noble light redeems blood with blood...
"Cure."
Elise placed her hand on my ear, chanting. Light poured out, pain fading. The classic cleric skill, Cure. Miraculous holy medecassol that healed and disinfected. No known side effects—just instant recovery miracle.
Getting healed like this!
Pure感動!!
"Ah! Such recovery power! Thank you, Sister!"
I thanked her profusely, moved!
"It's nothing."
Touching the wound, fresh skin had already grown. Infinite gratitude as I stood.
Checking myself, armor did its job—no other wounds. Gear made adventurers kill well and avoid death.
"Anyway, easy opponents."
"Indeed. Didn't expect it to end this smoothly."
"All thanks to the saintess's virtue."
I searched the bodies, but nothing worth taking, as expected.
Killing this many goblins would've been a jackpot. But against dozens of goblins, I'd be dead. They were smart enough to use tools—tough foes. Individually fodder, but they knew coordinated beatdowns. That's the danger.
Elise finished nosing and stood. We eyed the burning idol.
"We can just smash this, right?"
"Agreed."
I'd planned to grab the flag and bolt, but they were weaker than thought, so we killed them all.
"Ah, I'll do it. Rest, Sister."
"I couldn't..."
"You've used spells. Need a break, no?"
I stopped Elise from smashing. After Cure saved me potion money, no more labor for her. Heavy lifting's for men, right?
"W-well..."
"Yes?"
"I... want to smash the idol too..."
She said shyly.
"Ah."
Like kicking over a beach sandcastle.
"Haha! So spirited! Let's smash it together then!"
Thud! Thunk! Thunk!
Elise gleefully smashed the idol. Crudely made by primitives, it crumbled easily. Smiling mysteriously, unable to hold back laughter, she exploded in joy, shattering it.
She looked so thrilled, I stopped midway.
"Haa... haa... The God of Order will be pleased... Ah."
In under twenty minutes, the idol was rubble. Catching her breath, Elise seemed to snap back, bowing her head at me. Face flushed.
"Did I act unbecomingly?"
Just fucking cute.
"Unbecoming? People get excited sometimes."
"..."
I unfolded the flag leather and showed her. Picked it up while she smashed.
"Just take this now?"
"Ah... Yes."
Her face lit up seeing it. Hope she gets good eval. Cure saved me cash— she was my benefactor. No, she was. From today, Elise was my benefactor.
Then something else caught my eye.
"Hm? Oh yeah, Sister. Take that too?"
I pointed at a kobold skull on the ground. It had topped the idol like a Christmas tree star—ominous.
Brain inside, probably symbolic.
"Of course. We'll take this too."
Wrapped the skull in the leather, tying ends like a bundle. Wouldn't tie right. Quest item get. Return to village, done. Need that B key. Man, earning food's a bitch.
"Let's head back. Sun's setting late afternoon."
Sky showed sun dipping. Push as far as possible. Night march okay, but aim for walls.
"Indeed, getting late."
"Heh heh. Fun stuff flies by, Sister."
Packed up, we left the kobold pagan site—now a hellish bottom layer of talent show and gore—retracing our steps.
From that wretched slaughterhouse, kobold wails of grief and hateful curses seemed to echo.