Chapter 350
Chapter 350
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 350
Chapter Title: Kim Katt and the 40 Bandits
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"You've come from far away, so rest up well today. See you the day after tomorrow. It was fucking great meeting you today, Elise."
We arrived in front of Elise's lodging and exchanged greetings.
"It was great to see you too. I'm also glad to confirm that Your Holiness hasn't changed a bit. It's a fine day."
"I'm the unchanging Kim Katt, after all."
"Hehe, unchanging, are you?"
Elise let out a small laugh at my nonsense and played along. Truth be told, back when we first met, I'd never even seen her show any expression besides blank or angry. She'd changed a lot.
"...Your Holiness. Do you have any separate plans from now on?"
I was just thinking it was about time to head back when Elise hesitated and brought it up. Did she have something to say?
"Plans? Nothing in particular."
I didn't have any real plans to speak of.
Heading back would just mean the usual routine... which hardly counted as plans.
"Is that so? Then, perhaps we could..."
Was she hungry or something?
"What? Hungry? Hahaha, you should've said so. What do you want to eat?"
"...It's not that."
Elise's hesitation deepened.
"I need to prepare for departure, but... I don't know this city well, so I was hoping you could show me around. Your Holiness. Would that be all right?"
She'd been hemming and hawing, but it seemed she needed some help.
Well, she was the type who hated asking for favors.
Of course I could help.
But help.
Help.
Help...
Elise...
Was asking me for help?
In that case.
"HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I had to help.
"Y-Your Holiness!"
"I'll show you around right nooowwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Ah, aaaah! Why does it always turn out like thiiiis!!"
"Why? Because when you ask for help, of course I have to help! That's just common sense."
"Th-that... I see. Thank you for that, but... is yelling really necessary...?"
"Why wouldn't it be? This is only natural, Elise. Accept your fate. You can never escape my yelling. It's been decided since the day we first met."
"I can't believe it. My fate is this? O Order God, grant me an answer."
Of course, the Order God Izermart wouldn't deign to answer.
He's the god of order, not fate.
"Anyway, let's go. I'll show you around. This keeps making my mood swing up and down. Is it because of you?"
"...Th-thank you."
We'd just arrived at Elise's lodging, but we turned right around and decided to wander the general stores. It'd probably be good to give her a more detailed tour of the city too.
She might end up working around here someday.
Better to teach her early.
"By the way, Elise. Has the church figured out anything clear about those heretics? Like why Ezath's apostle showed up last time, or the symbols we were tracking."
I walked alongside Elise.
"Unfortunately, the church hasn't been able to pinpoint the truth in those heretical incidents. Heretics' rebellions stray so far from reason that normal human logic can't even infer them. It's a very difficult issue."
"Yeah... now that you mention it, that makes sense."
No normal person could understand the mindset of crazy heretics who go around cannibalizing. Of course it was hard to track.
"It's only natural that good people like us can't even think that way. Just entertaining those thoughts could corrupt a person."
"Well said. The moment you think about it and start to understand them, you fall into the path of depravity."
Elise continued with fanatical fervor.
"That's why the church always focuses on exterminating heretics. We must burn them root and stem, erasing the very concept so no one can even entertain such evil ideas."
"Exactly. Human ideologies are fragile things."
There was imperialism that swallowed the world.
Aryan supremacy screamed by Hitler.
The red army that cried equality while trying to burn the world.
Ideas so blatantly irrational, so vicious and evil they weren't worth thinking about—yet intellectuals and workers across Western powers fanatically supported them.
Just a few agitators and the right atmosphere could warp human thought in an instant. A true miracle of heresy, turning humans into demons so easily.
But in history, humans turning into angels? Not once.
Humans are monsters too, after all.
"Precisely."
Elise agreed with me.
"Heretics believe only what they follow is right, only their god is true. No flexibility, no consideration, no respect, no morals—nothing. And yet some still preach justice, peace, and love. It's utterly bizarre."
Heretics were no different from imperialists.
I was a seeker of Fusion Confucianism, representative of all discriminated barbarians in this land. It was my duty to judge those evil bastards and seize their wealth.
"Those fuckers exist?"
"Plenty. Recently, we got an official report about capturing a fanatic preaching teachings similar to a heretical sect that worshipped the Creation God Ingni-Ti-Trachel—supposedly wiped out during the Idol Wars. Truly the end times. Creation God? Absurd."
We wandered the city while receiving this impromptu religious lesson.
Elise's words were complex, but boiled down: this world was full of evil bastards you could kill without sin.
In other words, my wallets were lurking everywhere.
"This world is made of fragments from countless gods. Claiming one god created it all defies logic. Impossible. Omnipotence is an illusion. No sane person believes that. And they're not sane."
In this otherworld where transcendent gods actually existed, religious thought differed greatly from modern Earth.
Whatever. It was a world swallowed by polytheism.
"End times... end times! Elise! The world is still mired in suffering!"
"Yes! Despite the church's devoted service, the world remains filthy!"
"Rampaging monsters! Heretics plotting underground to overturn the world! Rebellious criminals and twisted ideologies! Imperialism!!! Hitler!! And bandits!"
"We must judge them all!!!!! Punishment! Judgment! Retribution! Repayment!!!"
"I'll kill them all and steal everything they have!!!! Even their souls!!!"
"And paradise will descend!!!!!"
—Kuaaaaaah!!!!!!!
—Saint!!! Divine!!!!!!
—Friend, Eliseeeeee!!!!!!!
We rampaged like total lunatics through the streets, buying supplies we needed. As expected, legally casting Divine Friend on Elise only worked during these religious chats.
"This burning heart of justice...! Bandit extermination in two days feels like such a waste! I can't rest even a single day!"
Amid that madness, after showing Elise around Isvant, the sun was setting.
"Hold it in, Elise...! Let that rage ferment for two days! Refine it by repeating it endlessly, then unleash at the perfect moment!"
"Understood! Excellent teaching! Then, Your Holiness! I'll head in now!"
"Alright!"
And so we parted.
She was all hyped up now, but once she calmed down later, she'd probably kick her blankets in embarrassment.
"Hehehe."
I returned to the inn chuckling at the pleasant thought, where Winia and Claudy were waiting. Winia asked what I'd been up to, so I said I'd met Elise.
"That nun girl?"
"Some bandits showed up. Seemed profitable, so I took it."
I summarized the key points from my chat with Elise for Winia. She nodded as she listened.
"So you went to meet another girl? Wanna die, blackie?"
"No, Winia ma'am. What part of my story sounded like that? The bandits are the main point."
Don't look at Elise that way.
"Kidding. Anyway, no worries about that nun. Blackie likes boobs anyway."
"Goddamn it."
"Anyway, you finally snagged a job after a while. Good work. Can't let blackie go alone if you're heading out. I'll tag along."
"Then let's sign the contract tomorrow. And Claudy?"
I called out to Claudy, who was sitting in a chair with her chest on the table, chin propped up, smiling softly at me.
"Katt, you're so diligent. Even left alone, you naturally hunt blood—born warrior indeed. Yes. Good boy."
"Such embarrassing praise. So, wanna come? Slicing bandit necks should be fun."
"Sounds fun, but... hmm. Go with just Winia this time."
"What's up? Turning down blood?"
Clady, devotee of the Warrior God Hel-Khan, refusing blood and battle?
Rare, so I voiced my surprise. She beckoned me closer with a finger.
"Wanna see that witch for myself."
Then whispered in my ear.
"Lisha?"
"Yeah. Want to talk to her. So go with just Winia this time."
"Well, if that's it..."
I'd planned to go together sometime anyway, but if she was curious now, no helping it.
Though we could visit her tomorrow and still kill bandits after.
Anyway, we wrapped up talk and ended the day as usual. Next day, Winia and I went to the guild to contract the bandit extermination.
Winia's pay was 30 copper too.
Budget reasons—they couldn't pay a mage more, even if they wanted.
"Hilarious. Seriously. Hiring a mage for 30 copper. Even my first mage gig paid more."
"Right? Total bullshit. So we'll loot their stuff clean. Main reward's the bandit spoils anyway."
Winia cursed but seemed oddly pleased.
"Got it. Been a while since just us two, eh blackie?"
"Yeah. Want anything? I'll buy it all while we're out."
"Aw, blackie's so sweet? Saying stuff like that."
"Anything for you."
"Oh my. Then I'll monopolize blackie today?"
Winia hooked my arm between her breasts and grinned happily. Her beaming smile tickled my heart.
"Fuck, with four women now, chances like this won't last. Later it'll grow, and we'll have to take turns with blackie? Blackie, I can't handle that future."
"Me neither. But if Claudy says so, we do it."
"Ugh. Anyway, blackie's mine today."
"Yes, yes."
This day, instead of resting and checking stamina, I got dragged around by Winia all day and only got back at night.
Shopping addict.
We returned loaded like we'd hit a hypermarket.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇ The next dawn.
Winia and I rose early to prepare for departure. Probably take a few days. Steeling our hearts to slaughter every last bandit, we said goodbye to Claudy.
"Katt, come back safe. Looking forward to the story?"
"Ma'am... I don't wanna go..."
"Hehehe, throwing a tantrum? Getting you this hard. Hate leaving mama that much?"
Clady naturally unbuckled my belt, sat me on the bed, knelt, and sucked my fully erect cock. The sudden loving blowjob filled me with strength for the day.
"Damn, blackie. You drained and crashed again. Sis's too maternal—can't say yes to everything."
"Winia... ngh...! Come closer...!"
"Tsk tsk."
Winia clicked her tongue, came close, undid her top to bare her breasts, and sat beside me. I wrapped an arm around her, groped her chest, and kissed her.
Thus, before heading out, Kim Katt—fully loved up and charged as the Heavenly Demon—stood upon the earth.
The Love Heavenly Demon would personally teach those evil hordes about divine love today.
"See ya."
We stepped out with Winia and headed to the Adventurer's Guild. My mind honed to the extreme, senses razor-sharp. Condition perfect.
"Blackie. Those guys over there?"
"Looks like."
At the guild entrance, the merchant employer and a cluster of adventurers. Counted nine. Not all here yet?
Spotted Elise walking up from the side.
"Saint. The morning of justice has dawned."
"Yeah. This is a holy war. Sleep well, Elise?"
"Yes. And you, Saint?"
"Of course."
Impulse to scream Divine Friend nearly overtook me, but Winia's glare stopped it. Greetings done, Winia greeted Elise.
"Blackie's nun friend. Long time."
"Good to see you, Winia. Hope you've been well."
"Yeah, seems so. Anyway, let's do this."
Now Kim Katt, Winia, and Elise were assembled. No matter what, we'd stick together, link up, and act in sync.
Sun not up yet.
Went to the merchant and announced our arrival.
"We'll depart at sunrise! Pay as contracted! Follow my lead!"
A few hadn't shown, but no-shows auto-voided contracts. Merchant didn't mention it.
Sun rose.
"Depart!!!"
And so our journey to slaughter bandits began.
"Ahh."
A spring breeze blew from somewhere.
"Nice wind."
The breeze tickled my cheek and heart. Vital spring. Loving spring. Nearing its end, but seasons cycle.
How many bandits would I kill?
—Thump thump.
Excitement swelled for no reason.
Truly a heart-pounding morning.
"Saint...! I can already feel an unstoppable urge bursting out...!"
"Me too...!"