Chapter 154
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 154
Chapter Title: Kobolds and the Underground Labyrinth
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We pushed through the pitch-black darkness, relying solely on Winia's light magic. It was barely at the level of an LED bulb, so it almost felt like daytime. Sure enough, this world's magic shared some common ground with modern Earth's tech.
With no real darkness, there was no tension at all.
We descended the stairs in utter boredom.
"Ah, right."
Since I was walking stuck right to Elise's back, I suddenly remembered that Winia had mentioned raiding a treasure room once. With nothing else to do, I decided to ask her about it.
"Winia, tell me about that time you went into the treasure room."
"No."
Her refusal was as curt as could be.
"Aw, come on, it's boring. Just once."
"Shut up, darky."
"Ah."
Why was she so prickly? Had I done something to piss her off again? I still couldn't read Winia's moods very well. Cloudy spoke up.
"Why don't you just tell us? I'm curious too. If you do, Katt will be happy."
"Don't annoy me, sis. And don't touch my shoulder. Don't let your hand slide down. Don't touch my chest. My nipple...! I said don't touch it!"
"Hehe, so feisty. Weren't you moaning all cute for your sis just the other day?"
"W-what?!"
They started bickering again. I'd gone and opened my big mouth for nothing. And Cloudy was already groping Winia. This was why strength mattered. Elise turned to look at my face, which must have shown my bewilderment at the crazy scene.
"Don't mind them. It's a common occurrence."
"Understood. That said, I'm starting to sense some evil now. Please be careful."
"What? Sense evil?"
She said she was starting to sense evil—it was phrasing that didn't quite make sense grammatically. Elise's way of thinking was just as bizarre as that trio of married bandit weirdos.
"Lend me your ears. Can't you hear the wicked sounds coming from the depths of the darkness?"
"...I don't hear a thing?"
"Truth be told, neither do I."
"????"
"Hehe. Just kidding."
Elise rarely smiled faintly like that, then made a triumphant face. For a moment, my brain couldn't keep up. What the hell was going on?
"Was it not amusing?"
With no reaction, her faint smile faded, replaced by a subtle gloom.
No way! Me, of all people, missing a girl's joke?!
The name of Kim Katt, king of jokes, was in tatters!!!
"No! It was hilarious! Give me a sec to pick up my bellybutton!"
"What does that even mean?"
I tried to recover with a joke of my own, but our senses of humor didn't connect at all. Our fundamental ways of thinking were just too different. It felt like me and Elise had been cut out of the world and frozen solid.
"...It's a joke."
"I don't know what it means, but if I understood, it probably would have been quite amusing. It's a shame I don't."
"..."
The mood turned awkwardly ambiguous. After that, we descended the rest of the stairs without another word. In silence, we delved quite deep. But right now, at this moment, we were finally bearing fruit.
We spotted something suspicious.
"Hmm? What's that?"
Cloudy drew her curved sword and pointed ahead with the tip. What was there wasn't an artificially made passage, but a roughly dug hole.
A hole punched right in the middle of the dirt wall.
Exactly my height in size.
"Looks like a passage expanded by kobolds... but it's a bit large."
"Yeah, tell me about it. If it'd been a little smaller, it would've looked natural. Maybe there are other things besides kobolds? Do they raise livestock or something?"
It felt a tad big for kobolds to pass through, but judging by the dug-out appearance, it looked like a passage they used. Even if there were other things, they were monsters all the same.
As Elise and I exchanged constructive opinions, a sigh came from behind. "Haa."
"Darky. Recite the kobold types for me."
"Recite the types?"
"Your hearing must be fine."
She suddenly asked me that.
"Well... Kobold Workers, Kobold Warriors. And Kobold Queen? If there's a queen, there must be princesses and princes too."
"Right. You know your stuff. So why's the hole that big?"
"Ah, yeah. Makes sense. Because of the Kobold Warriors?"
"Correct."
Kobold Warriors were the upgraded versions of the common Kobold Workers, like soldier ants specialized in combat. They were about Kobson's size, ferocious, fearless, and a real pain to deal with.
Since they were man-sized, if one showed up with workers in tow, the fight's difficulty spiked... I'd nearly died to them once before, so I knew well. Winia continued.
"So why would the kobolds make the path like that for the warriors to travel?"
"Uh... because the warriors need to move fast?"
"Damn, darky, you're smart. So what're you doing? Not drawing your sword?"
With that, she aimed her staff at the hole.
"—Combat ready!!!"
I yelped in surprise and drew my sword in a frenzy. Right—she was saying a hole like that meant kobolds could crawl out anytime. Cloudy guarded the rear. I stood at an angle in front of the entrance, and Elise shielded Winia.
"If there's a passage for warriors, the core facilities might be further in. Winia, could you illuminate the inside?"
"Hold on."
Elise could use a holy spell called Light Bolt. Firing something like a flare would let us see how far the hole went.
"Cloudy. Feel any presence or anything?"
I asked, and her ears perked up.
"No. I don't hear any movement... Should be safe to check inside?"
Elise nodded and began chanting. "With the light, He who comes forth..." With a crackle, holy energy gathered at the spiked tip of her mace, which looked like a sweet star candy. As she finished the chant, a baseball-sized orb of light formed.
"Light Bolt."
—Zzzt!
The orb shot into the hole, illuminating the darkness as it flew in with fierce momentum. From a glance, nothing was lit up inside. The orb flew a good distance before losing its light and vanishing.
"Hmm, weird? A warrior path, and it's empty. Maybe other adventurers swept through as a group?"
Winia voiced her doubts. The kobolds that should have been there weren't, which seemed odd.
"Then let's head in."
I cautiously stepped forward, sword tip aimed ahead, advancing slowly. The three women followed behind me. A hole perfectly sized for my height. We proceeded into it.
Plunging into a dark hole... It started feeling kinda sinful. The epitome of lewdness, really. Right now, I was basically raping this kobold dungeon (hole).
Thinking that way made me deeply uncomfortable... to the point I wanted to bail immediately. Suddenly, paranoid delusions hit: the dirt walls turning into a pussy. No, wait. Massive fluids leaking from the soil walls, flooding everything.
Oh... oh no! No!
I'm just one sperm...! There's too much fluid!
"No more! That's far enouuugh!"
I clutched my head and stopped.
"Hmm? Saint, what's wrong?"
"It's fine. Katt does that sometimes. You okay, Katt?"
"Y-yeah... Just a brief delusion."
I caught my breath.
The hole wasn't that long.
Soon, we reached the end—or rather, emerged from it. The weird thoughts lingered. Probably a side effect of too much sex. Maybe I needed some restraint.
"...A plaza?"
Exiting the hole revealed a massive plaza. We followed the downhill path. An underground plaza? Didn't look kobold-made. Countless kobold corpses were sprawled everywhere.
"Big fight happened here?"
"Looks like it. I faintly hear sounds. Sounds like fighting."
Cloudy said, ears attuned. We headed to the plaza's far side per her guidance. Up close, a passage leading elsewhere appeared. Now even I could hear it.
The sounds grew louder the closer we got.
Light beams poured from between the passage walls.
—Clang! Ch clang!
—Waaaaah!
—Kyaaak!
What unfolded before us was a battlefield.
Adventurers wielding all sorts of weapons clashed in outright war with swarming kobolds. It was overwhelmingly intense. The adventurers numbered at least two platoons, while the kobolds seemed three or four times that.
"They're coming endlessly!"
"Break through here! Keep pushing!"
The adventurers' shouts rang out. Naturally, the kobolds weren't winning—the humans were. The vast space prevented the kobolds' usual tactics, so the armed adventurers were untouchable.
—Kyurrrkyaak!!
Kobold Warriors shrieked grotesquely, swinging their arms at the front-line adventurers. "Hahat!" But against iron shields, it was futile. Puk! He stabbed the warrior's gut, and it collapsed.
"They're fighting like mad? Should we help?"
"No need, darky. They've already taken this place. Look at the kobolds going berserk—queen chamber must be nearby. Better to bypass and find it. Like an ant nest, so we'll get our chance too."
Our most experienced member, Winia, analyzed the situation. The sight made my blood boil, but sticking around offered no scraps. Group-on-group fights didn't end quick anyway.
"Then we head elsewhere?"
"Saw another passage besides this one. We'll take that."
So we skirted the battlefield for another path. Winia, with her experience raiding kobold nests, took point. Under her lead, we advanced through the dungeon without hesitation.
Experience really makes things easier.
Should've let her lead from the start.
"This is..."
Then, we found a massive stele embedded in an odd spot. Elise cautiously scanned around and approached it.
"Saint, look. Proof of heresy."
A familiar symbol was carved on the stele.
"I've seen it so much now, I could probably draw it from memory."
"Don't say such cursed things. I know you're joking, but you absolutely mustn't. Just copying symbols like this can curse you or corrupt you with evil."
"Relax. I won't."
Scaredy-cat Kim Katt would never do something that nightmare-inducing. Elise drew her mace, pondering. Her gesture looked like she was figuring out how to smash the stele.
Ever heard of the Cultural Revolution?
"Elise. Even so, smashing this might be too much."
"To see such an evil stele and be unable to destroy it fills me with bone-deep rage. Anyway, I've confirmed it with my own eyes, so the mission's half done... but I probably need physical proof. Just how to get it..."
"Opportunity will come."
—Tap tap.
I kicked the stele's base.
It didn't budge—an inch. Human strength was futile.
"What's this symbol anyway?"
Winia asked curiously. Cloudy had seen it twice before, but Winia was clueless. I gave her a quick rundown of past events. True to form, she lost interest fast midway.
Then don't ask...
"Wait. Sounds... coming this way. Fast."
Cloudy said.
No one mistook it for anything but combat.
We raised our weapons and took advantageous positions, tense and alert. The sounds drew near.
—Kyuuusaaak!!!
Finally, the kobolds' cries erupted.
The frenzied horde charged straight at us.