Chapter 129
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 129
Chapter Title: D-rank Adventurer Kim Katt
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"Then let's start by killing the sentries and waiting it out."
Kill the two sentries at the same time, suck up their mana while waiting, and then take out the ones coming to relieve them. That way, we'd wipe out four in a flash.
Taking out four right off the bat would make things a lot easier. Assuming there were twenty total, we'd be cutting their forces by a fifth before even stepping inside.
"Lina, you could seriously die here, so follow smart and careful. Stay as quiet as possible. And don't let them spot you. You've picked enough pockets to know the drill, right? I can't take responsibility if you bite it. You've only got one life, you know. Momma's hands are gentle hands, yeah?"
"Uh, something about that sounds kinda weird... but got it, oppa."
With that, we crept toward the mine entrance.
The two hobgoblins on sentry duty seemed to have severe ADHD or something—they weren't focused on their job at all. They were bouncing around like they'd spotted some mysterious, fun light, pulling off random sergeant jumps with their hyperactive antics.
—Hunk! Hunk!
—Huhuhung!
God, their cries were fucking annoying.
A surge of murderous intent boiled up in an instant.
But more than anything, those smug, happy-looking faces pissed me off.
Twisted, demon-like grins leaked from between their jagged teeth, like they were reveling in whatever. The kind of smile you just couldn't forgive. It felt like they were looking down on us.
Anyway, they weren't standing guard so much as just playing around together.
"Aren't those little shits like blackies? Same kinda antics?"
"Hmm, yeah, they do kinda match. Katt, like I always say, don't do anything too stupid?"
"No, what the fuck is this bullshit."
Winia jabbed my cheek with the tip of her staff.
—Hung! Hung! Krurta!
—Hung hung hung, Krur!
To time it right, I peeked around the wall to observe the hobgoblin brothers making fools of themselves.
They hadn't noticed us even this close, so their sense of smell probably sucked. Hearing too. Up close, their eyes looked crossed.
They got the concept of standing sentry, but they were just dumb monsters at heart. They hadn't picked up on us approaching at all, which suggested their discipline was shit even before senses came into play.
Classic Tang dynasty army vibes.
"Claudy, on my signal, we hit 'em together."
"Got it."
Claudy nodded. Distance to the hobgoblins: about fifteen meters. Full sprint, stab 'em in the necks simultaneously, and they'd drop without a scream.
No chance to alert their buddies, not even a peep.
"Winia, you..."
"I can handle myself, thanks."
"Yeah, you're better at this than me anyway."
"Damn right."
It was right then—the hobgoblins cracked some joke and burst into howling laughter. We seized the gap and charged. —Paht! That was the signal. Claudy and I rushed them.
—...Hung?
—Huhung...??
About two seconds after our footsteps hit. They sensed something off, turned, and started to stand. Too late. It'd be over before they got upright.
—Hung!
I lunged at the one on the right, shoving my gauntleted fist into its mouth to stifle any scream. Then jammed my blade between its collarbones.
—Huhung! Hukuuwuu...!!
I twisted the blade like a joystick.
It collapsed without finishing its cry.
"...This fucker's kinda weak."
Glancing over, Claudy had already decapitated hers and was watching me. The fight confirmed it: shitty reflexes, weaker than humans.
Just beefed-up goblins, basically.
"Yeah. Nothing special about 'em. Below expectations."
"See, blackie? Told you they were goblin chow."
They were outclassed. Or maybe I'd just gotten stronger? Things were going smoother than expected. Blades sank in easy—no thick hides.
"Anyway, loot's just two clubs and these shitty leather scraps they were wearing. Fucking useless."
Wonder if they'd even sell.
"Hey, Lina. Drag these bodies to that dark corner over there."
Lina nodded and hauled the hobgoblin corpses out of sight. We'd need heads as proof later. No point grabbing 'em now—collect at the end.
"Head in now?"
Claudy asked.
Peering inside the abandoned mine, no light needed. Glowing mineral dust dotted the walls and ceiling.
The dim glows pooled enough to make out shapes, even if dark.
"Wanted to bag a few more first... but let's go."
We pushed in. Only caution: no footsteps. Me up front, then Winia and Lina, Claudy at the rear.
I'd memorized the rough map.
A sharp turn came quick.
—Hururung... Kurung.
Creepy snoring. Peeked carefully: hobgoblins sprawled asleep. Three total.
"..."
They slumbered blissfully, pure as infants, ignorant of the filthy world—which just made me impulsively want to slaughter them.
I glanced at Claudy and nodded.
Approached the sleeping hobgoblin gently, clamped its mouth, and as its eyes snapped open, drove my blade into its nape.
—...! ...!
It thrashed, then shuddered still.
Too deep in sleep, trusting those idiot sentries.
No handsome prince to kiss the sleeping beauty cursed to eternal slumber. That'd just be a top-tier rapist in prince drag. Never trust anyone and sleep soundly with limbs exposed.
Didn't take long to massacre the napping trio. Shoved bodies against the wall and moved on.
"Five down already. If a dozen left, this is too easy."
Onward through the mine. No branches—all collapsed. Straight shot, basically. Then, something far ahead.
—Hoo, hurung?
"Shit."
—Hururururu!
The hobgoblin spotted us, freaked, and bolted around the corner. I knew we were fucked. No chasing it. It'd fetch buddies pronto.
Real fight starting now.
"Hey, fuck. We're screwed, right?"
"Our blackie's got a huge ass but sure scares easy. What if they call friends? Think we'll die hard?"
"Could be dangerous."
"Pfft, dangerous my ass. Scared, blackie? Want me to hold your hand?"
"No need..."
Winia didn't seem worried at all.
She launched into how many hobgoblins she'd roasted before. Guess I was overreacting.
—Tudududu!
Footsteps incoming.
"Here come blackie's pals. Go say hi. Play if you want. Want pocket money? Buy 'em snacks. Oh, can he even piss alone?"
"Quit teasing..."
Out came armed hobgoblin thugs. Six total. Four with clubs and stone axes, rear two with stolen farm pitchforks.
Don't underestimate farm tools.
Those were plenty threatening as spears.
—Hurung! Huruk!
—Kurungkurung!
The six berserk hobgoblins charged us, fearless.
Slower than humans running. I could hold against a clash, but those pitchforks coming like spears? Terrifying.
Claudy silently raised her curved sword. Two club-wielders hit her; the other two rushed me.
—Kyaak!
Both swung wooden clubs. One jumped for my head, the other my legs.
Slashed diagonally, lodging my blade in the jumper's shoulder.
No 3D maneuver gear here—can't change trajectory midair. Its fate was sealed the moment it leaped. Used my long blade's reach to parry the incoming club, then sank steel into flesh.
—Pukeok!
Bone-slicing feel, blood spray.
—Kwaang!
"You little shit!"
Two attackers meant eating one hit. Right before thigh met club, I shoved my leg forward, glancing it off my greave.
Wooden club couldn't dent steel plating. No pain. Kicked its shoulder hard. It dropped the club.
—Huwung!!
Grabbed the staggering one's neck, thrust it at the charging spear-thugs. It squirmed; pommel-smashed its face twice, went limp.
"Stop, you fucking shits! Gonna stab your buddy?!"
—Hoo, hurung!
—Hurung!
Held it up like a shield. The pitchfork duo hesitated. Smart enough not to skewer their own.
"Drop your weapons, cowards!"
I roared like a beast. Claudy had diced her two already. My yell made the spearmen falter back.
"Lower 'em, I said!"
"Dumbass blackie talking shit again. Think they'll understand?"
Winia grumbled at my antics.
"Hey, what if they do?!"
"Understand? Hey, get me? Nice to meet ya. I'm Winia. What's your name? Wow, they get it."
"...Goddamn it!"
Furious, I hurled the poor hobgoblin at the spear guys. They dithered—dodge or skewer?—and I plunged through the gap.
"Claudy! One's yours!"
Used my longer limbs to close in.
Spear or not, inside range and done. Rammed my blade into the nearest's chest. No need to say Claudy got the other.
All six hobgoblins down.
In a flash.
Eleven total now.
Over half gone. Too easy for humans. Our boldness and momentum sealed it. Compared to dryads or cultists, hobgoblins were neighborhood punks.
Easier than snapping a kid's wrist.
"Too weak? Had no idea the quest was this easy."
"Not an easy quest, Katt."
Claudy said, kicking a body to the wall.
"Huh?"
"You're just stronger now. Clean cuts. Leveled up quick?"
"Knew it! Hehe."
She approached, patted my head. Rage melted away. I nuzzled into her chest.
"Hehe, good boy. That's it. Such a good kid."
"Hehehehe."
Unlike Winia-bitch, Claudy was sweet. Worlds apart from her constant jabs. Big tits proportional to personality? Bullshit.
If true, Winia'd be a saint, ascended to heaven. Watching us, Winia shrieked.
"Fucking eyesore!"
This bitch.
Talking shit seconds ago!
"Little mage?"
Claudy said to Winia, still stroking my nape. Winia snapped irritably.
"What!"
"Wanna try?"
—Whish.
Sudden floatiness; shoved aside. Lost balance, landed in Winia's huge tits.
"Whoa, hey, you okay..."
"..."
Her breasts cushioned the fall.
I tried scrambling out. Once you sink in, no escape from Winia's boob grave. As I rose, she murmured low.
"...Stay still."
"Uh..."
She hugged me, stroked my head. Awkward as hell, so I froze.
No, Claudy, you bitch.
What do you take me for?