Chapter 239: His Sorrow
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 239: His Sorrow
“…Where am I?”
I had closed my eyes as I plummeted from the waterfall, but the sight I woke to was hauntingly familiar.
“This… is home?”
It didn’t take long to recognize the cramped flat I’d lived in alone a year ago, before I was transmigrated. Dust lay thick over everything, suggesting that a significant amount of time had passed in the real world as well.
“…Hmm.”
Still unable to fully grasp that I was back, I picked up the smartphone lying on the desk. Unsurprisingly, the battery was dead. Retracing hazy memories, I found the charger and plugged it in. With a heavy sigh, I perched on the edge of the bed.
“…Miss System.”
I called out in a low voice, a flicker of hope in my chest.
“Am I really… back?”
“……..”
“…Irene?”
Even after swallowing my pride and using the system’s nickname, it remained silent.
“I’m really back, huh…”
Still struggling to believe it, I lifted my hand and attempted to channel mana. However—
—BZZZZZZZZ!
“…..Ahh!?”
The sudden, deafening explosion of smartphone notifications made me shriek.
Missed Calls: 999+
Unread Messages: 999+
KaTalk: 999+ unread messages…
“What the… what the hell is this?”
It seemed a mountain of calls and messages had piled up during my absence. But something felt wrong. I didn’t have many friends, certainly no one who would contact me this relentlessly. How could there be this many?
[Senior? Where did you go? I miss you, senior, senior, senior…]
[Is it because I snuck into your house last time? If that’s why, I’m sorry. I won’t do it again, I promise…]
[Rihan? Don’t joke with me, okay? I’ll kill myself. I’m serious, I’ll really do it.]
[Rihan. You’ve been gone for so long, so I tried reaching out. Where are you? Did you go on a trip? I checked just in case, but the National Intelligence Service shows no record of you leaving the country…]
(Omitted)
As I scrolled through the messages, the contents grew increasingly bizarre. These were people who had been friendly colleagues and coworkers in the past… Why had they changed so drastically?
“This is really strange…”
Scratching my head, I tried to deduce the reason behind their sudden personality shifts. I frowned and began replying to the messages one by one.
“…Huh?”
In the middle of typing, I glanced at the date on the screen and froze.
“The date…”
The phone showed that an entire year had already passed.
“…So a year went by in the real world, too.”
Usually, in stories like this, time stands still or moves differently between worlds. I realized I had been clinging to that assumption. But the reality shattered it; a full year had passed here as well.
With that realization, the reactions of my old acquaintances started to make a twisted kind of sense.
[Is this really you, Senior Rihan? Really? Truly? If not, I’ll kill you, whoever you are.]
“……..”
No, honestly, I still didn’t understand. It was starting to creep me out.
…By the way, it’s been a while since I’ve heard this name.
I scratched my head at the strangely familiar tone of the message, a faint smirk playing on my lips at the repeated mention of my name.
It’s weirdly nostalgic…
Though it had been a long time since anyone had called me that, it stirred a sense of sentimentality. Rihan wasn't my real name, but a pseudonym I’d used back when I worked as a child actor. My real name was so embarrassingly old-fashioned that I’d always preferred using Rihan instead.
“…When Holmes deduced my surname, I was absolutely horrified.”
As I stood up from the bed, a chill ran down my spine at the memory of that incident from months ago.
“……..”
With a more serious expression, I began to ponder a fundamental question.
Did I really go to that world?
Sure, a year had passed in the real world, but beyond that, there was no tangible evidence that I had actually been inside the game. Could it all have been a delusion? Had I merely been shut away in my room for an entire year? Given my precarious mental state in the past, it wasn’t an impossible scenario.
Honestly, I kind of wish it was all just my imagination…
I tried to console myself with the thought that if it were a delusion, then that heart-wrenching separation wouldn't have actually happened.
“…..Huh?”
But then, catching my reflection in the mirror, I froze.
“……..”
The blue eyes I had inherited from my mother were gone. They were now dyed in the colors I had grown accustomed to over the past year.
“Ah…”
The grey of the professor. The black of the detective.
“…It was real.”
Seeing that, I couldn't make any more excuses. I simply collapsed back onto the bed.
—BZZZZZZZ… BZZZZZZZ…!
“Haha… ha…”
While the smartphone beside me buzzed incessantly, my eyes, weary from everything I had endured, began to close.
“………”
And so, for the first time in what felt like an eternity, I fell into a deep sleep in my own home.
*
—Adler… where are you…?
—I’m sorry… I won’t push you this hard again… Please come back…!
—I-I know you’re hiding! The cold will harm you, so please, come out quickly…!
“…Urgh!”
Only a few hours later, I jolted awake, drenched in cold sweat. It was a nightmare—a vivid, terrifying one. In it, everyone who had gathered at the Reichenbach Falls was desperately searching through the dark waters, screaming and crying out in anguish.
“Hah… hah…..”
That was the beginning of nearly two years of unrelenting nightmares and a life that could only be described as hell on earth.
.
.
.
.
.
“Hello… Yes, sis.”
The first thing I did after returning was investigate the game company I used to work for.
“…Pardon? It’s a ghost company that never even existed?”
But what was this? The investigation revealed that the company I had worked at for years had no record of ever existing.
“But I… I definitely worked there…”
—Zzzzt…
“…Alright, I understand. Yeah. Let’s talk about drinks later. I’m a bit swamped these days.”
I couldn't believe it, so I even called in favors from contacts at my former workplace—the National Intelligence Service. Yet, in the end, no trace of the company could be found.
“Hah…”
My investigation ended before it could even begin. Months passed, but the game that had been set for release never saw the light of day.
…Please, just for today, I don’t want to dream.
It was around then that the nightmares spiraled into something far worse, the visions growing increasingly dire.
—Adler… couldn’t possibly be dead. Not him… not my assistant.
Professor…
—He must be hiding somewhere in the world. I know he is.
The once arrogant and self-assured professor, now utterly shattered, roamed the globe in denial, desperately seeking the slightest trace of my presence.
—Adler… you’ve come back? Hehe… I knew you’d come to me on your own…
Miss Holmes…
—A-Adler? Where are you going? I-I’m sorry, don’t leave me! No! Adler!!!
Charlotte, devastated by her failure to conceive, was drowning herself in drugs, babbling incoherently all day long.
—Inspector Lestrade. Hasn’t your leave gone on for far too long? If you delay any further, there could be issues with HR. Perhaps… even dismissal…
—I don’t care.
—What?
—There’s someone I must find, even if it costs me my life.
Every single one of them, broken in their own ways, haunted my dreams. Despite my efforts to dismiss them as mere nightmares, the vividness was too much to ignore. Inspector Lestrade, who once held her duty above all else, had abandoned it entirely. Like Professor Moriarty, she tore through every corner of the world, searching for me.
—That… bastard…
Miss Watson…
—To the very end… to the very fucking end, you…
Watson had quit her medical practice and spent her days drowning in alcohol, spiraling into a pit of despair.
—Don’t talk nonsense! There’s no way that bastard could be dead!
—I killed him, I killed him, I killed him…
—Master…
The princess commanded every vampire across the nation with bloodshot fury to search for me day and night. Moran, locked away in her room, had shattered her beloved air rifle to pieces. Now a shell of her former self, she repeated the same words over and over. And Silver Blaze, so much like her, buried her face in my clothes, shedding endless tears.
—The organization… It’s disbanded as of today.
—Your Highness, are you unwell?
Lupin, leaving only those words over the radio to her scattered subordinates, shut herself away in Cagliostro Castle. Even Jill the Reaper ceased her murders and retreated into the palace, a shadow of her former self.
“Uh… ah…”
All of them appeared in my nightmares. Their ruined states gnawed at my sanity. Day by day, I began to deteriorate.
—Using Adler’s essence, which I had preserved, I finally succeeded.
Then came the nightmare that drove the final nail into the coffin of my mental state.
—I’m two weeks pregnant.
In the dream, the professor, wearing a somber expression, made the declaration to Charlotte and Watson.
“…Ahhh!”
From that day on, I could no longer fall asleep without sleeping pills or alcohol.
.
.
.
.
.
“…This isn’t right.”
About a year and a half after my return to the real world—
“It wasn’t… supposed to be like this…”
I had just awoken from yet another nightmare, one where Charlotte had finally uncovered information about Lovecraft. Cradling my head in my hands, I muttered darkly, my gaze hollow.
“Even without the eldritch horrors… she’s too dangerous… that bastard…”
Not long ago, I had convinced myself that dreams were just dreams. But now, fear had taken root. What if everything I was seeing wasn’t a figment of my imagination? What if it was actually happening in that world?
That fear had been consuming me for months. Because of it, I hadn’t been able to find a job or maintain a normal life. I had become a recluse, confined to my home.
I’m… so sorry, everyone…
If only—just maybe—I had stayed behind. If there had been even the slightest option for me to remain… Could there have been an outcome better than this one, which I’d chosen in the name of their safety?
I miss you all so… so much…
Lost in a haze of futile dreams, another day began to slip away.
—BZZZZZZZZ…!
“…….!?”
A sudden notification buzzed from my phone—a phone where I had deliberately blocked every persistent contact.
“Who…?”
Perplexed, I glanced at the screen, my expression a mixture of confusion and shock.
[Hey.]
[What have you been up to lately?]
“…What?”
My eyes widened in disbelief.
[Want to grab a drink?]
“…Kim Hanbyeol?”
Out of nowhere, a message had arrived—from my closest friend, who had gone missing years ago.