The Gaze from the Recycling Bin
I was watching from the balcony when my wife, completely unaware that a man nearby was staring at her, pulled recyclables from the basket she'd set aside for sorting. The basket was on the ground, so she kept bending over and straightening up as she worked. The man who had been secretly watching her glanced around once, then began moving closer to the recycling area where she stood.
Every time she bent down, her body-hugging dress naturally accentuated the curve of her hips. And that man kept stealing glances at my wife's ass.
That bastard... is he seriously sneaking looks at my wife right now?
Seeing him secretly spying on her sensual figure and getting his real-time visual fix made my stomach turn with displeasure. Yet for some reason, I decided to keep observing the situation a little longer.
I couldn't see his face clearly from this angle, so I didn't know exactly who he was. But judging by his clothes and overall style, he looked like a young guy. Probably in his early to mid-twenties.
I raised one hand to my face and rested my chin on it. Unlike me, who hadn't felt much attraction to my wife lately, this fresh-faced young man—not even close to my age—was clearly interested in an older married woman. The fact that he was staring at my wife's body felt strangely fascinating.
He might have just been acting on pure male instinct. Even though he could easily have looked and moved on, he was taking the risk of being seen as a pervert by a fellow apartment resident, yet he kept watching her anyway.
After cautiously checking his surroundings once more, the man grew bolder. He stepped into the recycling area and approached right next to my wife. He was so focused on looking around at eye level that he never thought to check above him. Maybe he didn't realize the apartment was built vertically, or perhaps he was too distracted by my wife to think straight.
Whether she knew what was happening or not, my wife continued sorting the recyclables. As luck would have it, there was an unusually large amount to sort today, so her task wasn't ending anytime soon.
What the hell is that young punk doing? The woman you're ogling is much older than you and a married woman, for fuck's sake.
He kept staring at her from behind, his eyes roaming over her body like he was undressing her with his gaze. Whenever she lowered herself, he would stare intently at the way her dress clung to her shapely hips. Slowly but surely, he was inching closer to her back.
Yu-jin, turn around. That pervert is staring at you.
I should have shouted at her right then. But I had no intention of doing so. Instead, I only screamed the words inside my head. In that moment, I was no different from the young man secretly watching my wife. If anything, as her husband, I was practically colluding with him by allowing it to happen.
No matter how I thought about it, I should have felt angry. Yet something else, something strange, was stirring inside me. It felt like something had slipped into my mind and was gently scratching and tickling me from within.
Even as discomfort washed over me, my heart began to race. The hot blood pumping from my heart seemed to surge through my entire body, igniting me with excitement. It was like knowing I was committing a sin, knowing the police might drag me away for it, yet still feeling an irresistible urge to do it anyway.
Maybe, by watching this situation like some kind of simulation, I was experiencing a sexual thrill from the idea of throwing my beloved wife, Yu-jin, to someone else.
Was I always this much of a pervert? What the hell am I thinking...
Just then, my wife slowly turned her head. She must have sensed something suspicious behind her. It made sense—someone was standing that close, staring at her so blatantly.
The moment she turned, the man watching her flinched hard. He quickly spun around and started walking away, radiating awkwardness. Even as he left, he kept stealing glances back at her until he disappeared from my view. It was as if he wanted to burn her image into his memory.
Fortunately, his perverted behavior didn't seem to register with my wife. She watched him for a few seconds, then went back to focusing on the recyclables. Soon after, she finished and turned toward the entrance of the first floor of our apartment building.
I slipped back inside from the balcony into the living room. It felt like I didn't want her to know I'd been watching her.
I haven't even done anything wrong. Why am I acting like this?
A short while later, the front door opened and my wife stepped inside.
"Wow, there was a lot to throw out. It took longer than I thought."
"Yeah... it looked like it. I figured as much."
"Anyway, I've finished all the housework for today, so I'm going to rest now."
"Alright. Thanks for all your hard work."
She acted completely normal, as if she had no idea what had just happened. As she walked into the bedroom, I quickly stole a glance at her from behind.
So that pervert was staring at my wife's ass, huh? Well, her ass really is incredible compared to other women. No wonder his eyes were drawn to it without him realizing... Honestly, this isn't even the first time something like this has happened.
The way her legs moved as she walked made the long dress cling and shift with them, revealing every curve. It was just casual home clothes, but on her, it couldn't help but look erotic.
After what I'd just witnessed, I realized I was now in the same position as that young man—openly ogling my own wife's body. Suddenly, I remembered what my senior Chul-min had once said to me.
"Where would you find a guy as lucky as you? A woman like your wife would have guys lining up by the truckload—hell, by the fleet. That's how attractive she is. So treat her right for the rest of your life, lol."
Yu-jin really did have the kind of looks that could captivate any man. Add in that sensual, slender figure that seemed designed to override instinct, and she was a woman overflowing with charm from head to toe. Even I, when I first saw her, couldn't help but stare—just like any other guy.
I'd dare say no man on earth could treat her like a saint. Back then, she had been quite conservative about dating and anything physical, so I remembered all the ridiculous effort it took to break through her walls. When I finally won her heart after all that courtship, I felt like I owned the whole world.
But our relationship hadn't been all smooth sailing. Even while we were dating, men were constantly swarming around her, hitting on her nonstop. Some of them knew she had a boyfriend and still tried their luck anyway. On top of that, I'd seen plenty of scummy bastards who approached her with ulterior motives, trying to pull shady shit.
So dating her had been pretty stressful. Whenever she had plans or was going to some gathering, I'd start worrying immediately. Especially when drinking sessions dragged on past midnight—I'd try not to think about it, but the anxiety would eat at me so badly that I started to understand how those jealous husbands on the news must feel.
I used to think I was the last person who'd ever be the jealous type. But after dating Yu-jin, after seeing and experiencing all those situations firsthand, my personality seemed to shift more and more in that direction.
Since I was thinking about it, I remembered an incident from back when we were passionately dating. Before we got married, Yu-jin went to a high school reunion. One of the guys there kept forcing drinks on her, trying to get her drunk. When the gathering finally broke up, he offered to take her home.
By then she was completely wasted, having drunk way past her limit. Luckily, she'd managed to call me before she got too far gone. Just from the way her words were slurring, I could tell immediately that she was drunk. I held back my boiling anger as best I could, asked her to send the bar's address, then grabbed a taxi and rushed to pick her up.
The timing worked out perfectly. She had just left the bar and was standing on the street. The guy who'd gotten her drunk was pretending to help her while she could barely stand, but it looked like he was trying to drag her off somewhere. Later I learned that she normally didn't drink that much, but he'd forced all kinds of drinking games on her to make her keep going. Since she was never good at saying no, she'd gone along with the group's encouragement and gotten swept up in the atmosphere. That bastard had clearly manipulated the games so she'd keep drinking, probably with help from someone else.
If I hadn't gone to get her that night, there's no telling what that sleazy prick would have done to her. The bar was right next to the red-light district, and there were motels everywhere nearby.
When I arrived, the scene I witnessed made my blood boil. He had one hand on her waist, groping her, and was pulling her into his arms. With a huge grin on his face, he was leading her toward a motel down the alley.
The second I saw that, I was so furious I almost ran over, ripped her away from him, and started throwing punches while cursing him out. But I didn't want her to get hurt in the process, and I didn't want to end up at the police station because of a piece of shit like him. Somehow I managed to exert superhuman self-control and avoided turning it into a violent incident.
My eyes had nearly rolled back in my head that night. Afterward, Yu-jin apologized to me for not controlling her drinking and cried as she promised to be more careful. Since it wasn't really her fault but that bastard's, I just comforted her while she cried and told her to be careful from now on.
Sigh... Thinking like this makes me feel like I've become just like that guy. I've never been like this before... Why now?
The feeling that I'd turned into a lowlife pervert like him started to make me feel strange. And eventually, I realized what I'd been feeling was the thrill of staying silent while another man—someone other than her husband—ogled my beloved wife, a married woman, with filthy eyes. I'd been quietly consenting to it. Enjoying it.