Is Going to the Military a Crime?
“Ha! Fuck. Seriously. This is fucking shitty.”
Even Novelpia, the one platform I still trusted, had been conquered by the feminists. Where the hell was I supposed to read web novels now?
My commute was always depressing, but today it felt even more like pure garbage. This shitty world was turning into a bigger cunt by the day.
“There used to be plenty of good novels on Joara too, but now it’s nothing but feminist crap. Sigh.”
In the middle of my brutal company life, my only hobbies were web novels and webtoons. Now even those were being overrun by feminists.
“Oh my, Sihyun! Good morning?”
“Good morning, Assistant Manager Miyoung.”
Forty-year-old spinster Assistant Manager Lee Miyoung. She called herself a gold miss, but with that face? How the hell was she a gold miss? She was still single because her face and body were a complete disaster.
“Coming in early, huh?”
“Yes. I’m a new hire—I should get here early.”
“Mm, true. Oh my, Sihyun, do you work out?”
“Excuse me?”
Just looking at her face made me want to throw up, yet Assistant Manager Miyoung casually closed the distance.
“No, no—it’s just that your butt looks so firm.”
This fucking bitch was sexually harassing me like it was nothing.
“Ah… yes. I just do some bodyweight exercises at home while watching YouTube.”
“Oh, really?”
She kept edging closer. Fuck. I was already in a foul mood because Novelpia had been swallowed by feminists, and now this first thing in the morning? Why the hell was she like this?
The spinster assistant manager suddenly groped my ass. I jumped and shouted.
“A-Assistant Manager Miyoung?!”
“Why so startled? Your butt’s just so plump—I was only teasing.”
Fucking hell, for real. A forty-year-old virgin grabbing the fresh ass of a young guy who’d just finished military service and landed a job—wasn’t that sexual assault? Apparently not in this dogshit Republic of Korea.
“Ah… yes……”
I swallowed it again today. In South Korea, the man always had to endure.
“Hoho, you go on ahead, Sihyun. If we walk in together people will think we’re dating.”
Crazy bitch. She was already fantasizing about an imaginary pregnancy all by herself.
“Yes, I’ll go first. Take your time.”
“Oh, right. On your way, stop by Starbucks and grab coffee for me and Team Leader Ayeong. Leave them on our desks.”
“What?”
“Expense it to the company account. Seonghyeon will know how.”
“Ah… yes……”
These feminist bitches treated the company expense account like their personal Starbucks fund.
“Sihyun~ Venti iced Americano. You know what AA means, right?”
“Ah, yes—iced Americano. I know.”
Sigh. Running into Assistant Manager Miyoung first thing meant the whole day was already ruined. As I walked ahead, the bitch kept sneaking glances at my ass from behind. Crazy bitch—go home, watch porn, and get yourself off with a vibrator. Why the hell was she eyeing a young guy’s ass with those filthy eyes first thing in the morning?
I walked faster, in a foul mood. Starbucks was packed even this early.
“Ah, shit. At this rate I’m going to be late.”
Five people stood ahead of me. Then a slim, pretty woman in her early twenties suddenly cut in line. Clear-cut queue-cutting.
“Excuse me?”
“Yes?”
She answered with brazen nonchalance, as if nothing had happened.
“Why are you cutting? I’m in a hurry too.”
She looked at me like I was the one being ridiculous.
“A man being this petty over something so small? Just yield.”
“I said I’m late for work too. Get to the back.”
She muttered just loud enough for everyone to hear.
“Ugh, what a small-minded guy for a man.”
Why was it only in moments like this that they suddenly called you “a man” or “that guy”? And she’d never even met me before—how did “that guy” roll off her tongue so naturally?
“Whatever. Just get to the back already.”
She ignored me completely. Fuck, for real. Getting this pissed off first thing in the morning.
“I said get to the back.”
“I don’t care. Report me if you’re so mad.”
Ha, seriously. Now she was pulling the “I dunno” card over something this basic. When they acted like that, there was nothing I could actually do. Just chalk it up to meeting a crazy bitch first thing in the morning.
The other men lined up behind me could only curse her with their eyes. There was nothing any of us could do.
“Next customer.”
The Starbucks barista called the number that should have been mine.
“Yes~ One iced mocha, grande.”
The pretty-faced, brainless bitch ordered without missing a beat. The female barista, birds of a feather, took the order even though she clearly saw the line-cutting. Concept-less bitches with zero business ethics.
I could only curse with my eyes. That was the reality of this dogshit Republic of Korea conquered by feminists. Fuck, for real. It hadn’t been this bad even ten years ago.
Every law in the country had been rewritten to favor women, and South Korea had become the Dogshit Republic of Korea. It all started with MeToo. Sure, some women had genuinely been assaulted and had every right to speak out—but most of it was just money-grubbing. Even the obviously false, cash-grab MeToo cases got the courts siding with the women. The men accused were mostly high-status: professors, politicians, famous actors… Most of them were innocent, yet they were branded sex criminals and crushed without mercy. Women simply filled the empty seats. And just like that, South Korea became a nation overflowing with feminists—the Dogshit Republic of Korea.
“Two iced Americanos for the order.”
I grabbed the drinks and sprinted so I wouldn’t be late. Even so, that crazy bitch’s line-cutting made me two minutes late.
“Oh my? Sihyun, why so late? New hires should come early. Hoho. Starting tomorrow, get here earlier.”
Assistant Manager Miyoung smiled as she tore into me. You fucking bitch. If you had even a shred of common sense you’d realize your own coffee errand made me late.
“That’s enough, Assistant Manager Miyoung. More importantly, Sihyun—come see me for a second.”
“Yes, Team Leader.”
Kim Ayeong, Team Leader of the Development Business Department. On normal days she was relatively decent compared to the others, but on certain dates she turned into a complete nightmare. Everyone knew what those dates were without being told.
I handed the Starbucks cup to Assistant Manager Miyoung and went over to the team leader.
“Team Leader, your iced Americano.”
“What? I don’t drink AA. Go exchange it for a hot cappuccino.”
“What?”
You crazy bitch. How the hell do you exchange a Starbucks order that’s already been made?
“Anyway, you know we have a meeting at ten this morning, right? Did you prepare the materials?”
“What? I never heard about a meeting today, Team Leader.”
“What? What are you talking about? Ugh, seriously, this is driving me crazy. Yuri! Yuri, get over here!”
Seo Yuri, the co-worker who’d joined the same day as me, hurried over. Pretty face, fox-like behavior. She only ever did the most annoying shit.
“Yuri, didn’t you tell Sihyun about today’s meeting yesterday?”
Yuri froze for a split second. She’d clearly forgotten to pass it on. Then her eyes started rolling—she was definitely cooking up some fox move.
“I did tell him, Team Leader. Sihyun, when we were leaving yesterday I clearly said there was a meeting at ten today and to prepare the materials.”
What? You fucking bitch. I left before you yesterday. You stayed late shopping online and left after me.
“Team Leader, Sihyun must have forgotten.”
Ah, this fox bitch. She’d deliberately claimed she told me when only the two of us were left so there’d be no way to verify it.
“When did you ever say that, Yuri? And I left before you yesterday.”
I couldn’t just take this lying down.
“Sihyun, don’t you remember? I clearly told you on the way out—meeting at ten, prepare the materials. He forgets and then plays dumb.”
Ah! I was so pissed the lid was about to blow off. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. It felt like I’d swallowed a hundred sweet potatoes.
“No, when did you ever—!”
My voice rose, and Team Leader Ayeong snapped sharply.
“Sihyun. Enough. I get it. Is yelling the only thing you learned in the military? If you messed up, just apologize.”
Ah, fuck. Why the hell was the military coming up now?
Team Leader, why are you suddenly bringing up the military? The words rose all the way to my throat and then sank back down. Endure it. Just endure it. Arguing further would only hurt me. Shitty company life.
That was when the fox-like Yuri jumped in.
“Exactly, Team Leader. Acting like going to the military is some kind of rank. He only got hired because of the extra points.”
Hey. Excuse me. Why does the topic keep sliding that way? Is going to the military a crime? And those “extra points” everyone keeps harping on—they barely help at all.
Frustration and rage made my face flush red and pale by turns.
“Team Leader, more importantly—you must be having a really hard day, right? I’ll bring you some warm tea. Men just don’t understand that kind of pain, so of course they bring something cold like iced Americano on a day like this. Cold drinks are the worst for that time of the month.”
“See? Only a woman really understands another woman. Yuri’s the only one who gets me.”
Excuse me. The person who ordered the iced Americano was another woman—Assistant Manager Miyoung. Ah, today was just a nonstop parade of pure shit.
“Actually, Assistant Manager Miyoung told me to buy—”
I couldn’t go down alone. I had to say something. But Kim Ayeong on her period was not a rational person. Every man simply looked like the enemy.
“Sihyun, why does a man have so many excuses? Stop making excuses and get out. Have the meeting materials ready before ten.”
Team Leader, those aren’t excuses—they’re facts. But catching a menstruating woman on a technicality never helped anyone. I swallowed my anger and headed back to my desk when Kim Ayeong added one more line.
“Sihyun, you think you can just walk off because you’re in a bad mood? Greet me properly and then go sit down.”
“Yes, Team Leader. I’m sorry.”
I had no idea why I was the one apologizing, but I apologized anyway and returned to my seat. Ah, I really wanted to quit this company. Should I just quit? I thought about it several times a day, but quitting was hard. Even though it was a mid-sized firm, I’d failed a hundred interviews before landing this job. In the middle of the COVID-19 crisis, a no-name liberal arts graduate getting hired as a new employee was like plucking a star from the sky. Fuck it—no matter how dirty and unfair it felt, I had to grit my teeth and stay.
I was sitting with my head down, sunk in gloom, when a welcome voice reached me.
“Sihyun, let’s go smoke one.”
It was Assistant Manager Kim Seonghyeon, the only other man on our team.
“Yes, Assistant Manager.”
I followed Seonghyeon up to the company rooftop—the one place that still offered any comfort at work.
“Company life’s rough, huh?”
“No, well……”
“Just hang in there, Sihyun. That Kim Ayeong fucking bitch always goes for the throat when she’s on her period. Ugh, what a shitty bitch.”
“I hate that dog-fucking bitch Yuri even more than Team Leader Ayeong, honestly.”
“Yuri? Oh yeah, I know that fox-like bitch. I’m suffering like hell because of her right now too.”
“Why, Assistant Manager?”
“The crazy bitch listed English as a specialty even though she can’t do shit. We’re supposed to translate English source materials together, but she dumps everything on me. And I can’t fire her now either.”
Once a new hire was on the books, it was hard to fire them unless they committed something massive. Big corporations might manage it, but mid-sized companies couldn’t afford the work gap.
“I got screwed by her today too.”
“The meeting thing? I heard the whole thing. Crazy bitch for real. The team leader told everyone to pass it on yesterday, but I only heard about it this morning myself. Looks like she deliberately told just you and me late on purpose.”
“Haa. So you got hit too, Assistant Manager.”
“Sorry I couldn’t help, Sihyun. If I stepped in there, they’d just say the men were covering for each other and that Kim Ayeong bitch would tear into us even harder.”
“I know, Assistant Manager. Honestly, the only reason I can still come to work is because you’re here.”
“Same. Before you showed up I was the only guy—it was hell. Having you around is a real relief.”
“Ha, for real. My unemployed buddies are jealous because our team has so many women. Those bastards have no idea how terrifying female coworkers actually are.”
Assistant Manager Seonghyeon glanced around to make sure no one was coming up the stairs, then spoke.
“Still, honestly—except for Assistant Manager Miyoung—they’re all ridiculously hot.”
“I’ll give you that. Even that bitch Yuri looks so fuckable if you only look at her face.”
“Team Leader Ayeong’s body is killer too. Sometimes when she’s tearing into me I imagine just blasting a load of cum all over her face.”
“Ah, Assistant Manager, come on. Your hobbies are so refined.”
“We’re gonna get scolded again for being gone too long. Let’s head down, Sihyun.”
“Yes, Assistant Manager.”
“And after work today, the 56th Division guys are grabbing drinks. Dongcheol’s coming too.”
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world! Loyalty~!”
The real reason I’d gotten so close to Assistant Manager Seonghyeon was that in the military I’d been his junior from the same division—same grandson serial number.