How to Secure an Honorable Discharge? (4)
“A tough life, huh. Witch of 203.”
A chill of terror so cold it could drain all the color from the face approaches. The girl standing before the massive wall squeezes every last bit of strength to fight back. But the instructor in front of her is unbeatable. The overwhelming fear forces surrender. In the face of that crushing fear, the girl’s courage is nothing but pitiful.
“But you and I, we’re both going to heaven.”
“How can I atone? I—”
“Atonement? Atonement? What a funny thing to say.”
The instructor says that and puts a cigarette in his mouth.
“Atonement is long overdue. Live with your losses for the rest of your life. Witch.”
The instructor mocking her.
A voice is heard.
Something warm and nostalgic.
“Even after that call from the bastard, you still haven’t gone home yet….” “By the way, your conditional honorable discharge application will not be accepted.” “You said your family went on a trip to Jeju Island, right?” “Who was it? The woman who raised you. If you’re worried about her well-being, judge for yourself.” “I suggested to the captain that the honorable discharge be advanced by two weeks.” “That ability is too precious to just discard. Perhaps it’s better to meet in death.”
Unknown words overlap subtly.
And then sitting in front of an unnamed grave.
The graveyard of nameless ones, the grave of 203.
Rain falls. I howl.
“Elia, it’s okay, it’s okay!”
Eve hugs me. Tears or rain, I don’t know, pour endlessly from my eyes. Since that day, I have become living despair. The only reason and only wish I live is to want death until my whole body rots away.
“It’s all over, it’s all over… Eve, everything…”
“It’s not your fault, hic, it’s not Elia’s fault—”
Deep black sadness is drawn in Eve’s eyes. The thick stench of death spreads. The stench of death swirling around me grows stronger. I wanted to die there. But the spirits who didn’t allow me to die smiled twistedly at the corners of their mouths and said.
“…Captain, why did you survive alone?”
ⴕ
She takes a sharp breath, eyes snapping open. To calm the pounding heart, she gulps air desperately. Soon dizziness comes. It’s become too much.
“- What is it? I’ve been sweating too much since earlier-”
“Calm down-, Captain is a-”
Wait, where am I? I can’t see ahead. Hospital? Was I rescued? My head hurts like hell. Voices are coming, but I can’t tell who is speaking. The ringing in my ears adds to the confusion.
“-! Are you awake? Elia-?”
“Erica -Captain? Too close- Mas-”
I escape Eve… and request magic bombardment to my location. After that, with explosion sounds, I lose consciousness. No, or the crazy scientist? Crazy scientist? What crazy scientist in a war zone? Surely the crazy scientist was chasing me? No. I was attacked by rebels at night-
“Ugh.”
“-! Are you okay-?!”
Pain all over the body. Did I survive this? No way. I thought it was finally over, but it’s not? Then what happened to the operation? Eve? The state of my body?
“Report.”
“-Ria?”
Fuck, the pain is so vivid. My whole body feels paralyzed. I can’t even move a finger. Then I remember the last scene I saw. The rubble of the collapsed building pierced my body, and I lost consciousness.
“Report. Did you not hear?”
“-Ria’s condition - will be taken care of. Now is-”
What nonsense is this?
The rebels succeeded in the attack?
A peaceful guy. Won’t prepare for the next attack?
“Contact the division leader and Laura right away-”
“Yes, right now-, Major.”
Though my mind is hazy, I force my eyes to focus. Even dimly, something catches my eye. Strangers in white clothes walking around me. And someone staring at me from quite close.
“-Ria? Your body- is it. Even if it’s hard, just a little-.”
Who is this person?
Calling me by name?
The division leader of 205 I was close with?
Wait, who is the division leader of 205?
What am I saying now?
“Captain Elia, now- F.A.C- test-.”
“Wait-! What are you saying-! Take absolute stability-?!”
“This is -’s confusion- calming- also a-.”
Unknown voices are arguing with each other.
They are doing well. Who are you guys?
“Initialize F.A.C.T-”
“Initialize!”
[Field Adaptive Calculation and Tactical System F.A.C.T.S initialized]
> [Field Adaptive Calculation and Tactical System F.A.C.T.S initialized]
A sudden blue light flashes in the hazy vision like a piercing eye. The incredibly strong light suddenly hits, causing nausea. Ugh, shit. This really doesn’t feel good. “Ugh-” and vomiting something from inside, the surroundings react noisily.
“-! Stop-! What are you doing right now?! Do you want to die-?! Immediately-!”
“Necessary measures-! Can’t help it-! Sorry- can’t help-?!”
The silhouette of the woman who was next to me until a moment ago pushing someone roughly is flickering. Huh? Hey, why are they fighting? The one who should be angry is me, but these strange guys are fighting each other.
“- …….”
“Sorry-.”
Immediately, she lets go of the hand grabbing someone’s collar and comes to me, starting to wipe the saliva from my mouth. Even though she is so close, it looks like there’s no condensation on the glass.
“-Ria. Slowly breathe-. It’s okay-.”
The person in front of me says this with a choked voice and holds my right hand. An aura like drugged dominates the body. But it doesn’t improve at all. Fuck, how strong a medicine did they give me? How badly am I injured? I slowly sit up from the bed and say.
“Report in wartime situation.”
“…….”
Silence.
Why are you not answering from earlier?
“I’ll ask again. What is the status of the rebels?”
“Rebels?”
What are you asking.
Don’t you know the front situation?
“Say it again. Rebels?”
Do you want me to repeat? I asked twice? These guys are being provocative since earlier. Not doing what they’re told. Dozens of silhouettes are blatantly observing me. Their gaze doesn’t sit well with me. Why do you keep using informal speech to me since earlier?
“Fucking idiots.”
“…….”
Damn, I need to confirm the survivors. This voice has been uncomfortable since earlier, like parasites wriggling in my stomach. The request I made to my location was regional total annihilation magic bombardment. At least two of the five squads should have survived. I need to check their status and go to Eve right away.
“Guide me. I need to report.”
“-Can’t! Stability-!”
With a trembling hand, she pulls out something attached to my arm, and the people in the room panic and try to stop her. When forced to stop action, anger rises.
“Then report. I’ll give one last warning.”
“-Ria. Your current body state is-”
I’m suffocating.
If you’re going to lay me down, report properly.
When did you start caring about the status of our unregistered members?
You bastards who treated us as consumables.
“-Captain Elia has woken up-?!”
Just as I was about to lower my anger, a blonde woman leading, accompanied by a woman in red uniform, enters the room. I stare at them silently. Although I can’t see well. Then they also stare at me silently. Who are you? Now they’re just coming in one after another. Did you come to see my paralyzed body?
“Division leader, you have come-.”
The people in the room salute the woman in red uniform. High officials from the Londinium Senate. Fucking bastards.
“Captain’s condition?”
“…Still needs stability-.”
The woman with golden hair standing next to the woman in red uniform approaches me with a choked voice.
“Are you okay? It’s okay, right?! It’s good… good…!”
“Laura! Still need stability for Ria-!”
Someone hugs me tightly, and the person estimated to be the 205 division leader who was answering my question earlier panics and tries to pull her away from me. But this blonde woman is not Eve. Then who is she?
“It’s good. Captain Elia. I was worried.”
A spark of confusion starts to grow in the blocked memory. Breathing becomes irregular, the inside of the skull banging. Wait, wait a minute.
“Stop. There is some misunderstanding.”
First, my medicine aura is a bit strong, but shouldn’t I introduce myself first, or call the instructor? Isn’t it appropriate to call the instructor? Why is TV carrying love and creating situations? Is war a joke? Yeah, if it’s the instructor, he would explain the current situation clearly. Let’s find the instructor.
“Where did the instructor go.”
“…Instructor? What do you mean instructor?”
Communication isn’t working.
You guys are strange…. A little later, let’s see.
“Medical officer, report the survivors.”
“Captain, what does that mean-”
“I said to report the survivors who survived the attack!”
You keep denying the past like that?
You already know, right?
Elia soldier.
A sticky and disgusting voice speaks to me.
Somehow familiar voice.
My voice.
Remember.
How those people next to me died.
“Elf girl, life, cool luck, the string is long.”
Yeah, yeah. Good. Remember a little more.
Who was it? The one buried under the rubble of the building, dying.
“Wait. I will do emergency treatment-”
“-! I will be satisfied with having seen that face before dying.”
The 201 division leader in my memory.
Completely crushed lower body.
Gradually cooling warmth.
The smoke from the magic bombardment turning the sky pitch black.
And the future approaching him, death.
“Sorry, I, hic, because I fell asleep during the night watch.”
“Return to headquarters and receive punishment. Then-”
“-Ah, will you receive it, you trash elf girl. Heh heh.”
Blood oozing from under the rubble.
How to stop that? No bandages.
Can I stop it? I can stop it.
First, lift this rubble.
“The neck can’t be twisted. It’s a shame, cool luck.”
“If I lift this rubble, I can escape.”
What are you trying to save? It’s already dead. It was right next to me?
Next to the 201 division leader who died after doing that a few times.
“Idiot. Heh, hic, cool luck. Hey, see you in hell.”
Remembered properly? His last words.
Shut up.
Five squads, over 60 people in total.
At least one should be alive.
“Survivor, survivor? Need to find the survivor.”
“Survivor? Captain Elia, first calm down-”
Hahaha, no way. You don’t remember?
Disgusting and creepy. Surviving alone.
Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.
“There is a survivor, there must be a survivor.”
“What does that mean-?”
There was also a squad fighting outside the building. Yeah,
They will be safe.
They will return safely-
“Captain Elia. Are you okay-?”
No way. Remember well.
It must be in the memory.
“Survivor... did you say?”
Yeah. That’s it.
What did that medical officer say to you?
“-None. All died in operation. The only survivor among 201, 202, 203, 204, 205 is Private Eve and you, Captain Elia.”
ⴕ
Arekate planet.
Londinium 01 district.
A small bar ‘Eden’ located in the downtown area.
‘Linda Scarlett’ returned from shopping for ingredients to serve to customers at nearby shops and simple snacks she would eat before opening.
“Oh, the door….”
Did I forget to lock the door.
“Well, it’s okay.”
It’s still early in the morning before the bar opens. She immediately heads to the room on the second floor. When she opens the door, the rusty hinge creaks and the scent of ‘Blue Moon’ she was drinking last night rushes in. ‘Blue Moon’. With a warm face popping up in her mind, she smiles faintly.
“Did you leave the cap open.”
It was morning before afternoon, so outside was brighter than ever, but her room was dark because of the carefully drawn blinds. Instead of eyes that still can’t adapt to darkness, she fumbles around to find the cocktail’s crystal cap rolling somewhere on the desk.
“Ah, here it is-”
The moment something is caught in her hand, a sharp glass breaking sound is heard. Something slowly soaks into the stocking that hasn’t been taken off yet. The smell of alcohol slowly mixes into the air. Holding the lost cap, she stands there for a long time.
“……Elia.”
The thought comes after the spilled alcohol from the broken bottle wets the entire sole of the stocking. Blue Moon. Elia’s best cocktail. The longing seeps into her heart like the spilled alcohol on the carpet.
“Elia, where did you go.”
The bottle is shattered and loses its function.
It died.
Then, does this crystal cap also have to die with it?
She can’t easily answer this question.
The eyes that couldn’t see anything, having adapted to the darkness, the color of the cap in her hand slowly comes into view. Dark green crystal. Elia’s color. She loved Elia’s lively emerald eyes.
But war took everything.
Elia’s shy smile too,
The memories left here,
The last remaining warmth.
The war born from the elders’ ugly desires. Innocent children who knew nothing were mobilized in this war. The heart twitches with approaching sadness. Her hand holding the crystal cap unconsciously tightens.
“-Ugh!”
Pain spreads from the bandaged hand. Red blood seeps faintly into the white bandage. She gently places the crystal cap of the cocktail bottle on the desk and falls onto the bed as if collapsing. Lying down, looking to the side, the photos densely packed on the desk attached to the wall come into view. The thinly coated photos sparkle under the sunlight coming through the blinds.
Memories with Elia
The sadness that was lingering in her mind slowly pushes away to the side.
There was Elia’s appearance burning bread, and the one where she wore a new dress and took a photo together in the rape flower field in the suburban village. Elia’s golden hair shining even more under the sunlight. Elia’s shy smile makes a smile on her lips.
As she sinks into the memories, drowsiness pours out. In the hazy eyes filled with pouring drowsiness, the words coming in. The day Elia disappeared, a neatly arranged memo on the bed.
I’ll be back soon, Linda. ~Elia~
About 12 years. Waited, but no news about Elia came. All emotions weathered over time, but the longing for Elia was as solid as a diamond. She could do nothing for Elia. Just pray every day that she returns safely. Powerlessness. Tears burst out. Trying to stop the crying, she covers her mouth with both hands, but the tears coming out from the eyes keep flowing and she can’t stop.
She turns her head and buries her face in the pillow.