Chapter 521: Dinosaur I-seo
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 521: Dinosaur I-seo
“So, you think the girl from earlier is the one impersonating you?”
“Yeah, exactly.”
It was lecture time.
I was laying out my theory to Oh Yun-ji, who was sitting next to me.
Even as she listened to my story, she was glancing back and forth between the professor and the chalkboard, taking notes with an almost eerie level of efficiency.
She’d always been incredibly shrewd about taking care of the things she deemed necessary.
That was why, even though it felt like we were always out playing together back in the day, Oh Yun-ji was the one who somehow always managed to keep her GPA spotless.
You could say she was resourceful.
“What was her name again?”
“Kim Woo-jin.”
“No, dammit. Not you. The girl.”
“Oh, Seo Da-mi.”
For a second, I thought she’d actually forgotten my name. I almost felt hurt.
“Seo Da-mi. Right. But what on earth does she gain by impersonating you?”
“…….”
“I mean, think about it. I agree with you that Seo Da-mi is probably Anonymous 160. Only the person who posted the thread can see their own post after being blocked.”
“Right? You think so too, don't you?”
“Yeah. But why impersonate you? That’s the part I really don’t get.”
She was suggesting there had to be a motive. However, Oh Yun-ji had a blind spot.
“Spoken like someone who’s never been a Bamboo Forest Manager.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Dummy, do you think people who post on the Bamboo Forest do it because they have some grand motive or reason?”
“…….”
They don't.
Not at all.
“They just post. Without thinking. They’re bored, so they stir up some aggro. They want attention, so they stir up some more. That’s the core of every shitpost.”
“You sound… really dismissive.”
“They deserve to be dismissed.”
How many years of experience do I have as a Bamboo Forest Manager? To me, those people aren't fellow university students anymore.
They’re just monkeys or chimpanzees inhabiting the Bamboo Forest who happen to know how to type.
If I don't think of them that way, I’ll lose all faith in humanity.
Oh Yun-ji looked at me with a resigned expression.
“Could you stop looking at me like I’m the one closest to being a beast and have no right to judge others?”
“As expected of my darling. You read my mind perfectly.”
“…….”
“And to add to that, I was thinking that at least those people only act out on the Bamboo Forest. They don't make it a reality like a certain someone.”
“…….”
“Is the guy with three wives and three girlfriends the beast, or is it the person just posting shit online—?”
“Okay, okay! Stop. That’s hitting a little too close to home. It hurts.”
“Hehe, you’re kind of cute.”
Oh Yun-ji laughed, playfully pinching and tugging at my sulking cheek. Regardless, the conversation continued.
“Anyway, the only way to know the reason is to ask her directly. I’ve seen all sorts of things happen on the Bamboo Forest.”
Anonymous 69 and Anonymous 407 were prime examples.
Anonymous 69 was Seo Ye-rin, and Anonymous 407 was the President of Gahyeon University.
Vibrate.
“I got a Tok from Ye-rin.”
“Good grief.”
Oh Yun-ji turned her focus back to her studies.
I discreetly checked my phone under the desk.
Two photos.
The first was Yu-na wearing dinosaur pajamas, and the second was Yu-na in tiger pajamas.
“This is insane.”
I nudged Oh Yun-ji with my elbow and showed her the photos. She let out a little chuckle.
“Send those to me.”
“Got it. I’m telling you, she’s so cute. I wonder who she takes after.”
“She looks just like Seo Ye-rin.”
“……Hey, half of her is mine, you know?”
I grumbled as I typed back a reply.
“Hm?”
I thought it would be more photos of the kids, but I was wrong.
To my surprise, it was a photo of Choi I-seo posing in dinosaur pajamas.
She was striking various poses, seemingly unaware that her picture was being taken.
I quickly plugged in my earphones and played the video.
Familiar voices flowed through the earbuds.
— Hey, Choi I-seo. Do you really have to go that far?
— I-seo is so kawaii!
— We can’t have the kids staring at phones or the TV all day.
Lately, they’d been playing dance videos on the TV or Neutube for the kids.
It seemed I-seo wasn't too happy about them being so glued to the screen.
With the three children sitting in a row, Choi I-seo, dressed in her dinosaur pajamas, began to perform the dance routine herself.
— Pfft! Choi I-seo, you’re actually good at this! Did you practice?
— Kids, look at Mommy! Look at Mommy, not the TV!
Choi I-seo danced around to the music of the children's song.
The kids loved it, bursting into fits of giggles.
And Seo Ye-rin was secretly filming the whole thing.
Then the camera tilted down and the screen went dark, but the video didn't end; only the voices could be heard.
It seemed she’d lowered the phone to avoid getting caught.
— Hey, let’s film this and send it to Kim Woo-jin.
— Absolutely not! You have no idea how much he’ll tease me. Ye-rin, you can’t tell him!
— Don’t you worry, my lady!
I just witnessed a betrayal in real-time.
Then the camera caught Choi I-seo again, diligently continuing her dance.
“Holy….”
This was truly insane.
I’m not joking—if this were an anime or a manga, I would’ve had a massive nosebleed.
A married woman with a child being this cute should be a crime.
“Ah, I feel like I can live today to the fullest now.”
I spoke with a sense of deep satisfaction as I saved the video and photos. Oh Yun-ji, watching from beside me, let out a hollow laugh.
“The fact that you’re realizing that while slacking off during a lecture is already a logical error, don't you think?”
“Hey, look at this.”
It’s a husband’s instinct to want to brag when his wife is being adorable.
I didn't really know that about myself, but I realized it after getting married.
Whenever my wives do something cute, I just want to tell the whole world.
When I held out my phone to show her, Oh Yun-ji doubled over, trembling as she tried to stifle her laughter.
“It’s insanely cute, right?”
“Pfft, hahaha! Oh, man. If I teased her with this, I’d be in big trouble, wouldn't I?”
“Well, I’d definitely be dead.”
The moment I showed her this, she might stop being a girl in dinosaur pajamas and turn into an actual dinosaur to maul me.
As in, I’d be bitten to death and eaten alive.
“The bar for being Kim Woo-jin’s wife is pretty high, huh?”
“Ahem.”
As I puffed out my chest, Oh Yun-ji looked at me, exasperated.
“I used to wear stuff like that for you too.”
“Ah… back then, it was puppy pajamas, right?”
Oh Yun-ji nodded.
Right, back then we did that and….
As I fell silent, Oh Yun-ji rested her chin on her hand, nodding as she reminisced.
“I ended up throwing them away after one use because they smelled like the loads of cum you kept blasting inside them.”
“…….”
“Those were really expensive, too.”
“Ahem.”
It couldn't be helped.
Back then, I couldn't restrain myself when Oh Yun-ji acted all cute in those puppy pajamas.
‘I probably couldn't now, either—.’
Though I’d likely still lose control.
* * *
“I’ve been thinking.”
“About what? How you want to have sex with Choi I-seo while she’s wearing that?”
“……I did think about that, but that’s not what I’m talking about.”
After the lecture ended.
Oh Yun-ji and I were walking down the hallway, continuing our conversation.
We were currently on our way to find Seo Da-mi.
I’d heard from Lee Gyu-a, via Ahn Hyun-ho, that they were in the same lecture.
It was about to end, so we were heading that way.
“Then what were you thinking?”
“My guess is, she’s a fan of yours.”
“Hm?”
I grinned, feeling like I’d come up with a very sharp deduction.
Oh Yun-ji tilted her head. Seeing how indifferent she was, it seemed she didn't have much interest in my impersonator.
“A fan of mine?”
“Yeah, that’s why she impersonated me. Because, after all, I’m known as your ex-boyfriend, right?”
“Right, you made sure the whole country knew, didn't you? You even went and publicized that desperate letter I wrote.”
“……Ahem.”
That was necessary at the time.
Since Oh Yun-ji knew that, she let it slide for now.
“You saw it earlier, right? How she took a photo of you and told me to get closer.”
“She did.”
“She’s self-inserting. Since I’m your ex, she intentionally had us take a photo together.”
“Hmm.”
“Doesn't it just feel right? I’ve heard that in all-girls high schools, girls actually confess to other girls quite often.”
“Well, that’s true.”
Apparently, confessions between girls are surprisingly frequent in all-girls schools.
“Maybe it’s something like that? I’ve got a gut feeling.”
I smirked, but Oh Yun-ji narrowed her eyes with a strange expression. She tilted her head ambiguously, looking somewhat frustrated.
I suppose getting a confession from another girl might not feel that great.
I know I’d be ready to throw a punch immediately if a guy confessed to me.
All to protect the chastity of my backside.
“There she is.”
We arrived just as a crowd of people began pouring out of the classroom.
I spotted Lee Gyu-a, who gave me a subtle look and signaled that Seo Da-mi was coming out.
“But why her?”
“There’s a reason. You don't need to know.”
“……Fine, but stop calling my brother out so much.”
“Hyun-ho? What are you talking about? He’s the one who called me for drinks last time.”
“What?! That time you went to the BBQ place two weeks ago, Hyun-ho called you?! He told me Chan-woo called him!”
“No, Chan-woo did call for that one. I’m talking about the gathering at the bone hangover soup place a week ago. Ahn Hyun-ho called me out of the blue for that.”
“A week ago…… he went out drinking?”
“…….”
Lee Gyu-a immediately pulled out her phone.
“Hey, Oppa. Can we talk for a second? Where are you?”
I offered a brief silent prayer as I watched Lee Gyu-a walk away.
Sorry, Hyun-ho.
“I used to be like that in the past,” Oh Yun-ji remarked.
I looked at her with an incredulous expression.
“Don't you remember? When I said I was going out, you’d grill me with questions before finally letting me go. You’re still like that now.”
“Ahem.”
When I said I was going to the bone hangover soup place a week ago, she nagged me so much.
She was so passionate about it, saying she’d fill the roles of all six people herself.
The important thing was that Oh Yun-ji’s behavior was actually praised by the other girls.
For the rest of my life, I’ll have to get permission from six different people just to go out for a drink.
“Ah, there she is. Da-mi! Come here for a sec.”
“Senior?”
Seo Da-mi flinched when she saw us as she left the classroom, but she quickly approached.
Seeing her reaction made me even more certain.
We moved to a spot near a vending machine where there were no people.
I calmly opened my mouth to address Seo Da-mi.
“Da-mi, listen carefully and don't get offended. Well, it’s not really something to be offended by—.”
“Why are you stalling? You’re Anonymous 160, aren't you? Why did you impersonate Kim Woo-jin?”
“Oh, come on.”
I was going to lay out my cool deduction, but Oh Yun-ji just spoiled the whole thing.
As she spoke bluntly, Seo Da-mi’s face turned pale, and she began to tremble.
“Y-yes. I’m sorry, Senior Woo-jin.”
“Shall I guess why you did it? It’s because you’re a huge fan. A fan of Oh Yun-ji—”
I wasn't going to let this moment be taken from me.
Just as I covered Oh Yun-ji’s mouth with my hand to explain my theory—
“That’s right!”
Seo Da-mi shouted, nodding as if she’d given up.
“Senior Woo-jin is my bias!”
“……Huh?”
Wait, what?