Chapter 176: Memories
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 176: Memories
“…….”
I stare blankly at the sky outside.
The sky is dark.
Because we’re deep in the mountains, the stars are packed tight, shimmering.
The moon casts a soft, gentle glow.
Suddenly, I realize I’ve been looking at the sky quite often lately.
‘My second older brother once said that looking at the sky a lot means you’re becoming an adult.’
He said that when you have more to worry about and more to take responsibility for, you naturally end up looking up at the sky.
Back then, I just took it for what it was.
But now, I wonder if this is how people end up seeking God.
Carrying worries, looking up at the sky, and calling out to a higher power.
Well, I didn’t exactly have any intention of becoming religious.
Besides, it wasn’t as if my situation required an omnipotent power to be resolved, so I left it at that.
“Did you work things out?”
At some point, Senior Ju-hee approached my side.
She hadn’t made a sound as she walked up, but I wasn’t particularly surprised.
She must have just been at the smoking area, as the heavy scent of cigarettes clung to her.
“I talked to I-seo earlier. And I heard Gyu-a helped you find Ah-rin. It looks like you just spent some time alone with Ye-rin, too.”
In the end, I had finished my conversations with the three of them, which had been my goal.
It was simpler than I expected, but the actual results turned out to be the exact opposite of what I had imagined.
“So, are they convinced? They didn’t look like they were having a particularly hard time.”
“Phew… Senior.”
Yes, I felt the need to talk to someone.
But I wondered if that person really had to be Senior Ju-hee. It hadn’t been that long since I rejected her confession.
“Go ahead and speak. It’s okay.”
But she was a senior through and through.
Whether she had already sorted out her feelings for me or not, she offered to listen to my troubles with total composure.
“Actually…”
I rubbed my forehead and gave her a brief explanation of the answers they had given me.
The story took only about five minutes.
I didn’t go into great detail; I just reported the results.
Before I knew it, she was staring blankly up at the moon alongside me, a cigarette between her lips.
“Ah, sorry. I shouldn’t do this in front of someone who doesn’t smoke.”
“No, it’s fine.”
“Smoking while I’m worrying is a habit. Phew… So, you told them all that you were going to reject them.”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“Then, what about that girl, Oh Yun-ji? Were you planning on dating her?”
“……Probably not.”
I knew I had to talk to Oh Yun-ji again eventually.
But considering my relationships with the other girls, the idea of me dating someone else felt… complicated.
“You’re exhausted.”
Looking at me, she murmured those words casually.
Exhausted?
“You look like you’re worn out from being hounded by them.”
“It’s not like that.”
I knew Senior Ju-hee said it out of concern, but I couldn’t call it exhaustion.
I didn’t want to describe their feelings for me as "hounding" or "tiring."
I had never thought of it that way.
“…….”
At my response, Senior Ju-hee exhaled a cloud of smoke and gave me a pat on the back.
“Let’s go inside. They even rented out a separate auditorium for the talent show.”
“The pension has an auditorium?”
“There are a lot of schools that come here for MTs, so these days, quite a few places have things like that prepared.”
I see.
But a talent show.
I thought it might be fun to watch the freshmen dance and sing.
As I walked toward the auditorium with her, the students were already sitting on the floor, facing the stage.
The professors were at the very back, already watching with cans of beer in hand.
‘The real drinking will start once this is over.’
There was some meat left over, and the cafeteria was piled high with snacks to go with the alcohol.
They were probably just trying to liven the mood before the heavy drinking began.
The 2nd and 3rd-year students had their own designated area, so we headed that way.
Choi I-seo, who was standing slightly apart from the others, waved at me.
It looked like she was standing in the corner, ready to jump in whenever the professors called for her.
“Woo-jin.”
Senior Ju-hee called out to me as I was about to head toward Choi I-seo.
She tilted her head with an awkward expression, then patted my back once more.
“Don’t worry too much. For now, just clear your head.”
“Yes, thank you.”
With those words, Senior Ju-hee coolly turned her back and headed toward the 3rd-year seats.
Since there weren't many 3rd-years, she stood out, but it truly felt as if her confession to me had never happened.
‘That’s a relief.’
I almost lost a good senior.
I was truly glad that Senior Ju-hee was so cool and composed.
“Did you talk to Ye-rin?”
Choi I-seo asked as I approached.
I didn’t have much of a reaction and answered calmly.
“Yeah, we talked. I warned her not to pick fights for no reason from now on.”
“Good job.”
“What about you? You said you were going to talk to the 1st and 3rd-years.”
“Mmm, I did, but…”
But?
“You know how it is. In the end, you can’t really control rumors.”
“That’s true.”
I knew that better than anyone, especially as the Bamboo Forest Manager.
In that place, small and large lies were often treated as truth and blown out of proportion.
“Ah, it’s starting.”
Choi I-seo didn’t say anything else.
She just watched the talent show begin, adding that the kids had worked hard to prepare.
“Hello, everyone from Gahyeon University’s Department of English Literature. I am Ahn Hyun-ho, the 2nd-year vice-representative, and I will be your MC for this talent show.”
Ahn Hyun-ho took the microphone.
Surprisingly, it suited him well, and thanks to his natural sociability, he drew a great response from the crowd.
The auditorium dimmed.
As the lights came up, the freshmen began to dance and sing.
It was a pleasant sight.
The freshmen were having such innocent fun that I almost doubted whether they were really badmouthing me behind my back.
The other students laughed and chatted as they watched.
In the midst of it all, the phone in my pocket vibrated.
— Oh Yun-ji -
Seeing her name on my phone screen felt more moving than I expected.
Just half a year ago, I would have been waiting for a call from this number at any moment.
It was funny how I felt a bit of discomfort now.
I left Choi I-seo and stepped outside.
Since everyone was gathered in the auditorium, there was no one around, allowing me to take the call in peace.
“Hello?”
— Hello. Are you at the MT right now?
“Yeah, the kids are doing their talent show. I think we’ll start drinking once this is over.”
— There must be a ton of people there.
“A ton.”
— You always hated that kind of thing.
“……Yeah.”
She was right.
I suppose that’s Oh Yun-ji for you.
To be honest, Oh Yun-ji knew my tendencies and tastes better than anyone else at school.
Back then, I had wanted to share everything with her.
I thought having phone calls like this with an ex-girlfriend only happened in America.
“What did you call for?”
At my question, Oh Yun-ji answered professionally.
— Oh, I wanted to say thanks regarding Popo. She started broadcasting again thanks to you.
The Bamboo Forest must be in an uproar.
I was worried the Department of Architectural Engineering might have spammed the board.
“Right, so that was it. Tell her to hang in there. I don’t really watch broadcasts, though.”
— Yeah, I’ll tell her.
I thought that was the end of her business and was about to hang up, but then—
— Is something wrong?
Her voice wasn’t one of deep concern.
But because of that, the concern reached me even more.
At her casual question, asked without any pressure, I almost poured out all my worries without realizing it.
“Why? Do I sound bad?”
I thought I sounded the same as usual.
— Just… the vibe? I’ve always been quick to pick up on these things.
“Right, you were. I could never hide anything from you because of that.”
— Hehe, that’s right. Remember back then? When you tried to hide that you joined the band club from me and got caught.
“……Why are you poking at old wounds?”
— You joined the band club just so you could stubbornly sing me a love song.
“Sigh, yeah. That’s right.”
I guess I had some romantic notions about club activities during my freshman year.
So I tried to join a band club, but I remember it being all women.
But that wasn't the problem.
— It wasn't a band club, it was an anime club. And one with very specific tastes.
“……When they asked me if I was a ‘top’ or a ‘bottom’ because I said I had a partner, I really felt dizzy.”
— You mistook it because they were cosplaying as a band anime. Jeez, I told you that place was weird and to look into it properly. Band clubs don't usually recruit people that easily anyway.
“I get it. That’s why I quit immediately.”
Oh Yun-ji was naturally nagging me.
How should I put it?
It was a conversation that brought back memories of when we were dating.
— ……It reminds me of when we were together.
It seemed Oh Yun-ji felt the same.
I naturally looked up at the sky.
“Yun-ji.”
Come to think of it, that’s right.
“Let’s break up.”
I hadn’t said it yet.
— …….
“I felt like I could finally say it now.”
Breaking up required courage.
And after a long time, I had finally gained the courage to say goodbye.
Yun-ji remained silent, but I continued.
“It was just… just a relationship we had in college.”
The kind you see everywhere.
The kind of time everyone goes through at least once.
That’s all it was.
“It might be hard and painful.”
I knew that all too well because I had experienced it.
“But as you live your busy life, one day, you’ll be able to laugh it off and wonder why you ever liked a guy like that.”
And I.
“I want to be that kind of person to you.”
The kind of person you can look back on and laugh about, even if you feel a bit embarrassed that we dated.
That’s the kind of person I wanted to be.
There was no answer for a long while.
There was no sobbing, no heavy breathing.
As I waited for her to organize her thoughts, she finally spoke.
— Representative Kim Un asked me once. Why I liked you so much.
Little Hyung did?
— He asked if there was a reason to like you enough to put in this much effort. If there was some kind of catalyst.
At those words, I also pondered for a moment.
When exactly did I start liking Oh Yun-ji?
I had no clear memory of it.
Yun-ji had just confessed, and I had naturally accepted.
— I guess he thinks life is a drama.
The sound of a chuckle came through the phone.
— Liking someone because of a specific situation… that’s actually rare, isn't it?
That was true.
Even when Yun-ji confessed to me.
We were just walking and eating ice cream.
— Love isn't something you fall into.
“…….”
— It’s something you realize at some point. That you were already in love with that person.
I felt like I finally understood why Yun-ji had suddenly confessed while we were eating ice cream.
— I can’t help it if we’re breaking up.
She didn’t sound sad.
Even though I had declared our end, Yun-ji was smiling at me instead.
— But one day, when I remember you.
Her words, filled with firm conviction.
— I’ll smile and think you were someone worth loving. That’s the kind of person you are.
She comforted me as quietly as the soft moonlight.
Always confident.
Quick-witted.
Acting on her convictions.
But occasionally showing a delicate side.
And only to me.
I remembered what I had forgotten.
It was this part of her.
Because of this side of her.
I had loved this girl.