Chapter 186: The Sorrows of an Office Worker (2)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 186: The Sorrows of an Office Worker (2)
The path to becoming an actor is never easy.
It was no different for Gu Ja-han. After deciding to pursue acting, he had to painstakingly persuade his parents to let him attend an acting academy. Because he started late, he couldn't make it into a Theater and Film Department, but after joining an agency, he worked his way up steadily from supporting roles to lead roles.
However, for some, it seemed all too easy.
"Why are there two idols in the cast?"
"Oh, come on, Ja-han! Seo-myeong is a good actress!"
"The other one is a total greenhorn. Aren't they from the same agency? It smells like tie-in casting."
In his heart, he even contemplated whether he should withdraw from the production. Still, he couldn't bring himself to throw away his first opportunity as a lead over something like this.
Fortunately, they weren't too distracting on set. Nothing much happened, other than the rookie idol named Kim I-wol being seen far too often. He could understand it to some extent; kids always want to stand out wherever they go.
That was, until the lead, Ha Seo-myeong, started openly pushing for Kim I-wol.
It all started with a minor disagreement between himself and Ha Seo-myeong.
"Ja-han, about the dialogue in this part..."
"Let's just do our own thing. It's just a back-and-forth."
"Excuse me?"
What was there to gain from rehearsing with a non-professional? Gu Ja-han had no intention of losing out or wasting his time.
When Gu Ja-han refused to cooperate, Ha Seo-myeong looked for an alternative.
"Iwol, what if we added a bit more dialogue to this part?"
"Do you mean an ad-lib? Considering the next development..."
He thought they were having a grand old time. A film set wasn't a playground. It was simply ridiculous.
No matter what they did on set, a sequence had a fixed length, so it would all be cut during editing anyway.
So, he decided to ignore them. Or rather, he intended to.
"Yeon-hwan, no... I'm sorry. Let's go again."
But he failed. Because the atmosphere on set was so disorganized, he couldn't even get a short line right. Since discipline hadn't been properly established, the whole situation was a mess.
"It's Yeong-hwan, senior," Kim I-wol said softly.
Gu Ja-han found the way he tried to "teach" him over something so trivial offensive, so he pretended not to hear and waited for his manager to bring him the script.
Unaware of Gu Ja-han's complicated inner thoughts, the people who are always around—the ones who love to gossip—chattered away about him as they pleased.
"Gu Ja-han is so damn full of himself, seriously..."
"Does he not know he only got the part after every actor at the top of the casting board turned it down?"
"How could he not know? He's just being a prick despite knowing. That guy only made it because of his height; otherwise, he'd never land a male lead role. Can't you tell by how long it took him to get a lead role after his debut?"
Gu Ja-han let the staff's sharp words slide.
"A bunch of nobodies."
You could always hire more staff.
But actors were different. Think of the financial loss incurred to fill the void left by an actor. Wasn't he someone with a completely different market value?
The staff, unaware that the subject of their conversation was listening to everything, excitedly continued.
"Those idols are the same. If they just filmed their parts quietly, it would've been over long ago, but they keep dragging out the shoot."
"Who's worse: Gu Ja-han, who's been around for ten years and keeps causing NGs, or Ha Seo-myeong's group?"
"Fuck, they're all the same."
People like that never hesitate to insult anyone, anywhere. Their habit of talking about others never changes.
Pathetic lives. Rather than stopping them to scold them, Gu Ja-han chose to simply ignore them.
It was about a month into filming.
"Wow... how does Gu Ja-han's acting not improve even after a month of filming that much dialogue?"
"They say he's a slow starter. I don't know when he plans to start, though."
"Shit, looks like he'll start at the wrap party."
Gu Ja-han was once again faced with people talking behind his back.
Just as he expected, they were the same. Loose-lipped people who loved to tear others down.
However, something had changed.
"I wonder if that Kim I-wol kid will keep acting?"
"Probably, right? He does well without standing out too much. He works hard, too."
"He doesn't seem to have an ego."
"It's just a rumor, but they say he's naturally very polite. Diligent, too."
"How much can you trust rumors in this industry?"
"At least here, it's believable. He doesn't butcher his lines like someone else."
"True, it's impressive he's never caused an NG. The kid knows how to use his head, so even the assistant director hasn't cursed at him once."
It wasn't that he wanted to be praised by people like that. Praise only feels good when it comes from someone of a worthy caliber.
But he couldn't help but have doubts.
Why? Over the same month, neither he nor Kim I-wol had changed a bit.
So why was the evaluation of that kid becoming so generous?
It was probably from then on. That Kim I-wol began to truly get on his nerves.
Gu Ja-han wanted to see Kim I-wol hit rock bottom.
From the perspective of an actor who had to perform with sincerity, he intended to face the face beneath that utterly hypocritical mask and say, "This is your true self. I know everything."
Perhaps because he was an idol, Kim I-wol didn't lose his composure easily. No matter what he was told to do, he had a smiling face.
Even though he was only in his early twenties. He was probably like that because he'd grown up receiving nothing but praise from his fans, never hearing a harsh word.
It was laughable, like looking at a flower grown in a greenhouse.
Gu Ja-han sneered.
"You'll be rolling over and showing your belly to the director soon enough. That's exactly what my dog does. Who knows, Iwol? Maybe you'll get a few more lines out of it."
For a split second, Kim I-wol's eyes darkened.
Truly for just a moment, a mere flash of time.
'Just now...'
Almost at the same time Gu Ja-han tried to register the anomaly, Kim I-wol laughed awkwardly.
It was a pure smile, without a hint of sarcasm.
"I'm not sure about that."
Kim I-wol brushed off his wet pant cuffs with his hands. Then, he bowed politely and left.
Why was it? He felt like he had seen a reflection of himself in Kim I-wol.
Specifically, the way he had thought of the staff badmouthing him as "a bunch of nobodies."
Looking down on people? Who does he think he is?
It was a blatant insult. As a senior, Gu Ja-han had the right to point out Kim I-wol's attitude.
Gu Ja-han hurriedly chased after Kim I-wol.
However, he had to hide behind a wall at the sound of a voice just as he was about to turn the corner after him.
"Director, did you have a good meal?"
"Yeah."
It seemed Kim I-wol was facing a director from some department—whether it was lighting or sound.
"Hey, Iwol."
"Yes, Director."
The director called Kim I-wol again.
Right, as if Kim I-wol would only play his image games with the main PD or the assistant director.
The way everyone acted as if the world would end if they didn't praise Kim I-wol was truly a sight to be—
"Tell them to do that 'tone down' thing or whatever, and do it properly. Why should I have to get stressed because of you?"
"Are you referring to my skin tone? I was told it was sufficient as it is, but should it be darker?"
"Sufficient, my ass. You need to look somewhat like a human being for the shot to look good. You look like a corpse. Go to a hospital or something."
"Yes, sir."
"Oh, and you're not going to snitch to the press like your PD, right? I'm not saying this because I hate you, okay?"
"..."
For a moment, Gu Ja-han's mind went blank.
He thought he was the only one being strict with Kim I-wol on this set.
Since everyone else was strangely lenient with him, he had intended to say something so the kid wouldn't look down on this industry.
'You'll be rolling over and showing your belly to the director soon enough.'
'You look like a corpse. Go to a hospital or something.'
What was the difference between what I said and what that man said?
And...
"Thank you for your concern. I will pass the message along to the makeup artist."
"I'm glad to hear you didn't lose anything important."
...Why does Kim I-wol seem so used to this kind of situation?
Gu Ja-han stepped toward the corner.
As he rounded the bend, he saw the director walking away as if nothing had happened, and Kim I-wol slowly straightening his back after what must have been a deep bow.
Even though the director's back was turned to him, there was no sign of emotion like anger on Kim I-wol's face.
A line from Seon Gu-an, which Ha Seo-myeong had performed not long ago, came to mind.
He couldn't remember it exactly. What was it again?
Right, it was definitely...
'Fuck. This is embarrassing.'
Gu Ja-han immediately called his manager.
"Hey, you're in the car, right? Is the script for the last episode of In My Office there?"
Fortunately, all the scripts were in the car. They were a mess because they'd been shoved into the back seat, but he could read the part he was looking for without any trouble.
Gu-an: (Exploding) Someone like you, Team Leader, probably doesn't know how we rank-and-file employees feel. When a superior sighs, it's not that we didn't hear it; we're pretending we didn't. When we seem fine after getting chewed out, it's not because young people these days lack responsibility and aren't affected; it's because we're pretending to be okay! (Shouts as if frustrated) Because you can't just act on your feelings while working—that's what professional life is!
Below Ji Seong-in's dry dialogue, Seon Gu-an shouted again.
Gu-an: We're not enduring it because we're fools, and we're not staying silent because we lack courage. We're holding on even if it's dirty and cheap. No one has the right to look down on that. (With a bitter smile) For the record, I'm also taking a big leap of faith by telling you this right now. Because you have to speak up when it's truly time to find your voice.
In this scene, Ji Seong-in had come to see Seon Gu-an in a different light.
Then what about himself?
"Acting is a noble craft that shows the most human side through the most mechanical methods."
For Gu Ja-han, who had jumped into the acting world because he couldn't forget those words from a great senior, the role of an arrogant team leader named Ji Seong-in was given to him.
For Ha Seo-myeong, who was bold, proactive, and didn't hesitate to speak her mind, the role of Seon Gu-an.
And for Kim I-wol, the role of the quiet youngest member of a promising team in a large corporation who was good at navigating professional life.
Was he cast as Ji Seong-in because he was lead actor material, or was he simply a good tool to express the character because he was naturally arrogant?
Conversely, was Kim I-wol's professional conduct a means of survival, or was it just his natural social skill?
Or was it the most well-rounded, human form he had mastered in order to blend into human society...?
Kim I-wol's wet pant cuffs flickered before his eyes. So did those deep eyes.
He felt ashamed.