Chapter 168: Field Work (2)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 168: Field Work (2)
Octopus catching was an item brought in by the junior writer.
While it wasn't exactly peak season, mudflats had long been a treasure vault for variety shows. They had the advantage of low scouting costs, which allowed the production to offer appearances to higher-tier celebrities than usual.
The fact that one had to shovel dozens of times just to catch a single octopus also perfectly matched the "hardcore" vibe the program aimed for. Thus, octopus catching proudly made the shortlist of items.
The problem was who would actually go catch them. It was all because of the intensity of the labor.
Even for seasoned veterans of many years, a few hours of tight work would leave them breathless. The camera director, who had gone on a scouting trip, returned with a review saying that just pulling his legs out of the mud to walk was exhausting enough.
With cockles, you could at least lean on a mud sled to rest, but for octopus catching, the only thing you had was a specialized shovel. Even then, if you tried to put too much weight on the handle, the shovel would just get sucked into the mud.
Because of this, celebrities lacking physical strength weren't even considered. In such a harsh environment where it was already difficult to get enough screen time, if the cast gave up early, the crew would have to drag them all the way to the Mokpo auction house just to fill the footage.
The performers couldn't be too quiet, either. They had to at least be able to throw out some comments while catching the octopuses. They couldn't exactly expect scenes of "professional talk" with other experts or conversations with customers while working out there.
And above all... they needed the sense to actually catch the octopuses. Whether it took fifty shovelfuls or sticking an arm into a hole the moment they spotted one, they had to catch at least one to create a scene for the broadcast.
"So, you're saying we need someone who's strong, has great stamina, is good at shoveling, talks a lot, and is also good at catching octopuses?"
"Is that going to be hard to find?"
"No, I just don't think such a person exists."
The meeting almost ended in a disaster.
However, the atmosphere was resuscitated when Spark came to mind—a group that was strong, had great stamina, looked like they’d be good at shoveling, chatted well amongst themselves, and might even manage to catch some octopuses.
"But will Spark agree to appear?"
"Why? Did they blow up that much through Awangsil?"
No matter how much of a buzz they’d created with one program, it shouldn't have been enough to jump tiers that quickly.
As the PD looked on, puzzled, the writer spoke up.
"PD-nim, you didn't watch the broadcast, did you? I-wol collapsed during the live show due to the aftereffects. I heard they won't be doing many external schedules for a while."
"Really?"
The PD’s expression turned desperate. He knew very well that Spark’s "work efficiency" was centered around Kim I-wol.
The production team sent the casting offer anyway, clutching at straws. And once again, they succeeded in getting an acceptance.
To live up to Spark’s passion, they decided to prepare even more thoroughly this time. They wouldn't tell them the location in advance and would keep them completely in the dark. All so they could see the flustered reactions of the unsuspecting idols.
However, the production team had momentarily forgotten one thing. The reason they liked Spark in the first place was that they were a group that exceeded their imagination.
"Ugh..."
"Jihyeok, what's wrong?"
"These guys have been talking for three hours straight."
Not only did they drive the audio director crazy by never stopping their conversation during the entire three-hour drive...
"It's a mudflat."
But they also managed to clearly deduce their destination just by looking at the dark highway.
"Gasp."
"How did they know...? The driver didn't turn on the GPS, right?"
"He didn't."
The production team went into emergency mode. If the members had their phones, the entire day's item would have been leaked by now.
Fortunately, according to the manager, Spark was a group of idols who—unlike most kids these days—still weren't allowed to use cell phones. That was the only consolation.
Though his heart nearly stopped about three times, the camera director successfully captured Spark’s surprised expressions. It was a moment of pure catharsis.
The members followed the expert around, seriously learning the techniques. There was even a strange academic fervor coming from Lee Cheong-hyeon.
"To think I'm actually seeing a mudflat octopus at its source... Its legs really are thin and long...!"
Lee Cheong-hyeon covered his mouth, deeply moved. The PD made a note to tell the junior writer to check if that member’s interest was seafood.
"Alright, everyone scatter and start catching octopuses. Don't forget there's a penalty for those who don't meet their quota!"
At the mention of a penalty, the members turned pale and scattered in all directions.
The main PD stuck with Kim I-wol, along with one cameraman. He had a feeling that following him would result in interesting footage.
Kim I-wol stared at the mudflat for a long time. Then, he firmly gripped the handle of his shovel.
Up to that point, he was just an "idol solemnly attempting to catch octopuses."
"I-wol, have you finished your military service?"
That was, until Kim I-wol started shoveling like a madman.
There wasn't a single wasted movement in the way he gritted his teeth and dug out the mud. The dirt he tossed aside piled up in a circular mound around him. Even compared to the other members shoveling in the distance, his speed was on a different level.
The precision of digging deep into a single hole. The speed sufficient to chase an octopus fleeing through the mud. The tireless stamina.
The three elements aligned perfectly. As Kim I-wol scooped out a large clump of mud, an octopus revealed itself.
"Is catching it like this okay, PD-nim?"
"Uh... yeah! That's excellent!"
He had no choice but to praise him, given the perfect condition of the mudflat octopus.
At this rate, Spark might just fill their quotas and go home peacefully today.
The PD grew a little fearful. He contacted the junior writer on the boat and told her to find out what time the Mokpo Fisheries Cooperative Auction House stayed open until.
'Is this the seventh one?'
I estimated the number of octopuses I’d caught so far as I dropped another into the basket I was carrying. My arm muscles felt like they were going to explode.
And the ground... every time I took a step, I sank in up to my knees. I nearly ended up planting myself like a stake in the Mokpo sea against my will.
"Hyung, how many did you catch?"
Lee Cheong-hyeon walked over, dragging his shovel.
"Six or seven?"
"Really? How did you catch so many? I haven't caught a single one."
"You just have to dig like crazy when you see a breathing hole. What about the others? Did they catch any?"
"Well, Ju-woo hyung is a lost cause. He's basically being eaten by the mudflat."
Just hearing Cheong-hyeon's words, I could imagine how much our main vocal was floundering.
"Well, as long as he doesn't hurt his throat eating mud, it's fine."
"Sometimes I really can't tell if you care about Ju-woo hyung or not."
"I'm a total Ju-woo-lanthropist."
As I was professing my sincerity to Lee Cheong-hyeon, a loud scream echoed from somewhere.
That temper... it had to be Choi Je-ho.
Sure enough, in the distance, Choi Je-ho was stabbing his shovel into the innocent mud. If the cameras weren't there, he probably would have hurled it away. It was a good thing I’d given him a crash course in character education.
"Is something wrong?"
"No, the octopus legs keep getting cut off!"
At the feet of the indignant Choi Je-ho lay an octopus missing two legs.
"Maybe your positioning is off?"
"How am I supposed to know where it is inside the mud?"
"They said you have to track the traces well."
"If I spend time looking at that, I'll lose it."
"That's why you have to shovel faster."
"You guys really look like Dumb and Dumber."
Lee Cheong-hyeon muttered as he watched Choi Je-ho and me peering into the pit.
"The point is, you can't just dig it out with brute force."
"Are you calling me ignorant right now?"
"I'm saying common sense is missing from your strength."
"Do you think I won't understand just because you changed the wording?"
"Your intuition has improved, hasn't it?"
Still, I gave Choi Je-ho some one-on-one coaching so he could catch a whole octopus.
I also rescued Park Ju-woo, who was struggling to move even a single step, and wiped the face of Kang Gi-yeon, who had done his best despite getting mud splattered all over him.
We even had a mid-point tally session.
I had caught nine, and Choi Je-ho had caught eight (though not all were intact). Jeong Seong-bin had six, Park Ju-woo had five—he said he got lucky while he was face-down—and Kang Gi-yeon had one.
And...
"Lee Cheong-hyeon, what happened to you?"
...Lee Cheong-hyeon proudly showed off his empty basket. He was so confident that I was momentarily speechless.
"I mean, the moment they hear even a little bit of a footstep, they run away!"
"Well, did you expect them to just sit there and let you catch them?"
I put two octopuses into each of the youngest members' baskets.
Considering there was an hour left, I felt I could easily fill my own quota.
Plus, I didn't want Kang Gi-yeon, whose knees and ankles weren't great, wandering around the mud for too long.
"It'll be too late if we wait for the tide to come in, so let's give it our all now. Got it?"
"Yes!"
With a spirited cheer, we headed back out into the vast mudflat.
As if the shoveling skills etched into my nerves hadn't rusted, I became one with the shovel again in the second half of the session.
Park Ju-woo picked up speed halfway through and started targeting octopus spots like a pro, and Jeong Seong-bin also steadily filled his basket in his usual quiet way.
Ah, Choi Je-ho also succeeded in catching a perfect octopus.
It wasn't that he found the knack for it; he just dug up the mud as if he were excavating the whole area. I thought he was a backhoe. I guess if your body is good enough, your brain doesn't have to suffer.
Lee Cheong-hyeon finally caught one tiny baby octopus, but for the sake of the natural cycle, he released it back into the wild. It was a sad but necessary step.
"The tide is going to come in soon. We'll do the final tally on the boat!"
With the PD's final announcement, all the members gathered on the boat. Not a single person looked decent. Our visuals were enough to convey exactly how hard we had worked.
"During the mid-point tally, Cheong-hyeon's results were the lowest, right?"
"Yes, and they probably still are."
Lee Cheong-hyeon boldly emptied his basket. Two octopuses—presumably the ones I gave him—crawled out.
"You didn't catch a single one?"
"A person can't be perfect at everything."
Lee Cheong-hyeon was even shameless about it. Kang Gi-yeon looked at him with an incredulous expression.
"Then how many did you catch?"
"No matter what, I caught more than you."
While giving Cheong-hyeon a hard time, Kang Gi-yeon revealed his harvest.
"Three? Didn't I-wol hyung give you two as well?"
"Anyway, I caught more than you."
We had only checked two baskets, and already there were two candidates for the penalty. The broadcast certainly wouldn't be boring. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
—
Profile
Name: Choi Je-ho
Birthday: November 3rd
Birthplace: Gwangju Metropolitan City
Height: 187cm
MBTI: ISTP
Nicknames: Center Emperor, Hwang-je-ho, Big Troublemaker, Family Meeting Dealbreaker
Likes: Physical activity
Dislikes: Annoying things, accessories
Motto: (None)
Favorite Food: Meat
Preferred Scent: Lavender
Favorite Music Genre: Funk
Favorite Sport: Basketball
Body Part He’s Confident In: Thighs (later added "Back" due to someone's insistence)
Personal Habit: Frequently touches the hinges when wearing glasses