I Absolutely Don't Have That Kind of Taste (2)
Thud. An empty beer can hit the table corner next to Dorothy.
"You eat well—better than I expected."
"Hoo. I'm trying my best to drink it down. The carbonation's stinging my throat."
Honestly, I was a little surprised. I'd barely sipped two or three gulps, but Dorothy had chugged hers from the start and already polished off a whole can. I knew this wasn't some leisurely daytime drinking session, but given her personality from my experiences, I hadn't expected it to turn into a full-on "chug the most beer" contest.
She was dead serious about mana recharge, that much was clear. It felt worlds apart from a couple months ago, when I'd been busting my ass to win over Neria. If only all the apprentice witches I'd meet from now on were as proactive as Dorothy. Then I wouldn't have to put in so much effort.
"I'm really glad I got paired with a witch like you this time, Dorothy-nim. Truly."
"Glad? Isn't it the opposite? It'd be easier to hook up with a witch who just enjoys casual sex, rather than a high-maintenance pain like me."
"Someone like that wouldn't need the Rehabilitation Support Department's help anyway. She'd already be spending her time with all sorts of guys."
"Ah, right. I'm already a bit tipsy, I guess. Forget I said that."
"Haha…."
She tilted her head in brief confusion at my honest words, then nodded right away. She cracked open a fresh can, and I lightly clinked mine against it.
And a moment later.
"Pfhaaa……."
"Hoo…."
Thud. Another empty beer can landed in the table corner, next to where the first one had already been cleared. That made two for her already. Compared to me, sipping slowly to avoid getting drunk, she was downing them several times faster.
"The buzz is starting to creep in bit by bit. I'm not one for this sort of thing, but I can see why some people like it."
"It definitely has its charm. Cigarettes still baffle me, though."
"Cigarettes baffle me too… Oh, does Nam Dowon like drinking?"
"Eh. I just tag along when friends drag me out? I don't go hunting for drinking parties on purpose."
"Thinking about it, that's pretty much my vibe too. …And hey, could you pass me a beer can?"
Since I'd piled all the snacks around Dorothy, the trash and spare cans naturally fell to me. I rummaged in the convenience store bag right next to me and handed her one.
"Here you go."
"Thank you… …Uh."
The beer can I handed her slipped and thudded onto the table. She'd grabbed it sloppily, barely catching the end. Since we were both sitting, it didn't fall from a height, but it still hit with a solid thunk—loud enough to hear clearly. A few snack pieces under it met their end without so much as a scream.
Those were my favorites, too.
"…Sorry. I was chugging so fast, I guess I got drunk quicker than I thought."
"No, it's fine. This was the plan from the start, after all."
"Mm…. I'm scared to crack this one open right now, so set it aside for a bit. Could you hand me another from over there?"
This time, she reached out properly. We clinked cans briefly, and I took a moderate sip. We chatted about trivial stuff—mundane Q&A about human guys' daily lives, which might seem novel to a witch.
…After a few more tilts of the can.
"…Hoo. My stomach's full just from the beer now…."
Clack. Another empty can wobbled into place at the table corner, accompanied by some unnecessary noise. That made three. Her stated limit. I'd barely finished my first sip left.
"How's your body feeling, Dorothy-nim?"
"Not sure. It's fuzzy, but I also feel totally sober…."
"Even after chugging that fast?"
"Yes. I can still do basic math without issues."
True to her word, Dorothy looked exactly as she had before touching the booze. Sure, there'd been minor slip-ups, but outwardly, she seemed unchanged. Some people flush bright red when overdoing it, but not her—her face stayed as pale and pristine as ever in my memory. Her eyes weren't glazed over either. If anything, her staring at me with that expression was getting burdensome.
And no weird drunken habits, either. Her tongue wasn't slurring, and she wasn't suddenly turning clingy and puppy-like toward me.
…Though I'd kinda want to see the puppy version. Anyway, no signs of that yet.
This led to two natural conclusions. First, her self-assessed tolerance was off. Second, maybe she was the type who didn't show it outwardly.
"How about standing up and taking a few steps?"
"Walking? Good idea. Watch me."
Simply cracking another could work, but testing midway seemed better than force-feeding someone whose belly was full of beer. And it wouldn't take long.
So when I suggested she walk beside me, she nodded and stood right up. She smoothed her sweater hem lightly, then took careful steps—one foot at a time.
"What do you think? A bit dizzy, but I'm still in the normal range."
"……."
Like a newborn fawn, wobbling wildly left foot, right foot, totally off-balance.
"Nam Dowon?"
"…You look pretty drunk to me, Dorothy-nim."
"No way. I admit to a little, but not that much."
"No, you are. I've barely had one can myself."
"…True."
"And from my view, you're quite intoxicated. Probably hit you faster from chugging."
"I'm not drunk." Ironically, one of the top phrases from actual drunks. These folks usually become the person to watch at parties.
But luckily, this was my place—just me and Dorothy. As long as blackout-drunk Dorothy didn't go wild with magic, no big issues.
She was the type who didn't show drunkenness easily. Time to update the Witch Wiki.
Dorothy staggered closer on unsteady feet.
"Fine. If it'd been Neria saying it, I'd dismiss it as cat babble, but since it's you, Nam Dowon, I'll trust you."
"Thanks…?"
"But I'll drink a bit more beer. I still feel totally fine."
Recognizing that walk as normal is proof you're drunk.
…Even if I explained gently, would she admit it? A powerless human like me had no choice but to let the witch do as she pleased.
In the end, I nodded and watched her crack a fresh can.
"Pfhaaa…."
"……."
She tilted it back hard, probably downing 30%. And with that, "blackout Dorothy_final_true_version" was complete.
Now, as we'd discussed earlier, time to check a few things.
"Dorothy-nim."
"Yes? Does that mean it's time to wrap up and head to sex…?"
"Ah, n-no. Not wrong exactly, but we should check first."
"Check… Ah, right."
"Let's start by confirming if you still find me super repulsive and disgusting."
"Understood…."
I stood and approached her, extending the wrist she'd used as a test subject so many times. To her, it was like grabbing a fat, wriggling worm—utterly loathsome.
Could alcohol dilute that instinctive revulsion?
"…Not sure how to describe it exactly."
The results were in.
"Better than usual. …Remember what we talked about earlier? Childhood friends getting drunk and jumping into sex."
"Yeah…."
"Kinda like that. I know it's you, Nam Dowon. The 'handsome gorilla' impression hasn't changed much, but everything's… better than normal."
"……."
"Oh, got a good analogy. Today, it's like shaking paws with a handsome big dog."
From fat worm to handsome dog. That was an absurd level-up.
"Anyway, now I feel like it'd be okay to take you home and live together. …I should stay away from booze from now on."
"That's a relief in this situation. So then…."
"…Sorry, but getting drunk doesn't mean I've developed a bestiality fetish."
"……."
"Even a handsome big dog— what woman would mate with something like that…?"
…But sex was still off the table.
What to do now….
"Still, you're the only man who's ever gotten such high praise from me. Feel proud. I recommend writing it in today's diary."
"Ahaha…. Thanks…."
I gave a wry smile, but lingering like this would end with just diary notes. Determined to try something, I pulled Dorothy up.
"Dorothy-nim. Could you go along with my idea this time?"
"Your idea…?"
"Yes. First, let's move to the bedroom."
"What? Fine. Guessing you've got some idea to make sex possible with me."
"At least it'll be a stepping stone."
"I see."
Thankfully, she stood without resistance and followed me to the bedroom, even sitting on the bed like a chair. Her walk screamed drunk, but her elegant movements remained intact.
…Unlike her master Rin-nim, who didn't stand out in that way.
Whatever. Not the point.
"What's your idea, Nam Dowon? If it's taking advantage of me drunk and forcing it, I'd rather you didn't."
"……."
"My condition was 'when I don't find you repulsive.' And I have no hobby of bestiality with dogs."
The reason I'd brought her to the bedroom. After steadying my breath, I answered her question with another.
"Dorothy-nim."
"Yes."
"Would you… maybe…."
"…consider trying a bestiality hobby and getting lavishly pampered by a big dog?"
"…Pardon?"