Chapter 7
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 7
Chapter Title: Teaching the Apprentice Witch
-----------------------------------------------------------------
First impressions aren't really all that trustworthy.
They're amazingly good at greasing the wheels of new relationships... or sometimes splattering shit all over them.
But even so, it's 70% looks, 20% rumors, and reliant on that last 10%, right?
A sweaty, balding guy with a protruding belly who somehow looks like he'd have a real talent for breeding... he could actually just be a decent, ordinary person.
Someone who's top of the class, an all-around sports star, great with friends, with the looks of a sculpture... someone like the manga protagonist I saw at Neria's place yesterday... he could turn out to be a pervert beyond words.
With that in mind, the Water Apprentice Witch I met again today, Neria Heka.
Or more precisely, slightly revising my 'day three' assessment of Neria.
"Good morning, Lady Neria. Did you sleep well last ni..."
"Hey. Cut the moronic-sounding crap and do one errand for me before you come in."
"An errand?"
"Yeah. I'll pay you right away, so head to the convenience store up ahead and grab some food? Like a triangle kimbap or a sandwich."
Willful like a witch, but the kid's got a good heart.
"...Lady Witch, do you usually settle for convenience store food like that?"
"Not just convenience stores—normally it's frozen fried rice, but I forgot to reorder before it all ran out."
"......"
"What? Why are you looking at me like that? Don't like my pretty eyes?"
And while it's nothing special,
she's a girl with seriously lacking survival skills.
That's about the extent of it.
"Do you cook well?"
"Well, I wouldn't say I'm great with total confidence, but I think I'm at least average."
"Average, huh... Hm..."
"And at the very least, I figure I can do better than frozen fried rice."
"Ha? What're you saying? You don't know how good frozen stuff is these days? I was skeptical at first too, but once I tried it, it's actually pretty..."
"I eat it sometimes too, so I know. It's good."
"...So you're saying you can do better than that?"
"I don't know your tastes, Lady Witch, so that's a worry. But it'll probably be fine."
"Hm."
Neria, clutching a thick novel she'd apparently been deep into.
I caught her worried gaze and lifted a heavy bag up to my navel.
Luckily, the house had some cooking supplies, so instead of just the convenience store run, I took extra time to shop properly and come back.
It was pitiful seeing her rely on convenience store meals, but this was also a good chance to get closer to Neria.
If she'd freaked out when I offered to cook for her before leaving the house, I'd have switched plans on the spot.
But fortunately, she showed a bit of interest instead of recoiling.
Couldn't pass up an opportunity like this.
"By the way, I like stuff with a slightly strong flavor. Slightly. For real, just slightly."
"Got it."
With Neria's approval, I headed to the kitchen and double-checked the tools.
The frying pan, clearly doused with frozen fried rice multiple times, showed heavy wear.
The pot next to it probably got used for occasional ramen—faint scorch marks there too.
But the kitchen knife was screaming 'never used!' to anyone who saw it.
As I scrubbed it with a scouring pad and neutral detergent, Neria, hovering nearby, asked,
"What're you gonna make?"
"Fried rice."
"...Huh? I thought it'd be something special, but fried rice again?"
"I don't know your tastes yet, Lady Neria. Figured something you eat often would be safest."
"Fair enough, I guess."
"Any foods you especially like?"
"Like...? Hmm, fried stuff? Anything with meat or greasy usually tastes good. I just don't eat it much 'cause it's bad for you."
Fried food, huh.
If you're not at an age where digestion's an issue, everyone loves that.
I nodded at her vague answer and rummaged through the shopping bag.
Unfortunately, no frying mix.
Besides, for messy cleanup like frying, it's better to just order it.
So what emerged from my hands were essentials like salt, sugar, pepper, soy sauce,
plus the carrot, onion, eggs, instant rice I'd bought for today.
And finally, a can of tuna.
Laid them out since I'd use them right away, then neatly rolled up my shirt sleeves.
"Ah, wash your hands?"
"Just did while cleaning the knife."
Maybe because it'd go in her mouth soon?
I figured she'd poke around a bit then go play games, but Neria was still chattering right beside me.
Shame she was a good three steps away, but positively speaking, she tolerated that distance.
I washed my hands again where she could see, then focused on cooking.
With fried rice as the goal, the process wasn't anything fancy.
Chop the veggies fine.
Fry in tuna oil.
Finish with instant rice, soy sauce, scrambled eggs.
Neria's 'ooh' reactions to my simple knife work were a little—no, pretty damn cute.
But I kept quiet, not wanting to make her self-conscious and get chewed out.
"If it's too bland, let me know."
"Sure."
With the tuna veggie fried rice done, Neria grabbed a spoon and plopped down at the table on her own.
She licked her lips, saying the smell was promising, then shoveled in a big spoonful without hesitation.
"...Mm!"
"Is it okay?"
"It's good? For a male prostitute, it's pretty... Oho..."
"...Haha."
Pass for now, at least.
That said, the 'male prostitute' bit lingered in my ears for a while.
She's got a good heart, but her word choice is straight-up destructive.
...At this rate, 'maid' might fit better than male prostitute.
I wiped my wet hands roughly and sat naturally across from her.
A late thought of 'is this okay?' crossed my mind, but since Neria didn't complain, it was probably fine.
"Do you like cooking usually? Or did you pick it up living alone?"
"......"
Then came this question.
After agonizing over my answer for a while,
I gave it straight, casually.
"I don't like cooking, but living alone for so long, you just end up able to. Can't order delivery every day."
"So it's 'cause you live alone?"
"Mm. More like my parents both passed early."
"...?"
"Picking a civil servant job at twenty was largely because of that too."
"Wait..., ...cough! Cough!"
I'd heard witches were made by the moon herself.
Figured with barely any concept of parents, she wouldn't feel much about my story, but surprisingly, Neria started coughing like something went down wrong.
Another extension of 'she's got a good heart'?
Water was already nearby, so I tore off a tissue from the table's dispenser and handed it over.
"You okay, Lady Neria?"
"Sorry..., cough! I had no idea..., cough!"
"No need to worry. It's been so long it's numb to me now."
"Still.... Um..."
"I'm really fine. Seriously."
"......"
What a good witch she is. Neria.
Thinking that inwardly, I waved it off to show I was okay.
No one was digging into my chest with this; just mentioning it was no big deal.
Too much time had passed to wilt over that alone.
"......Mm."
"......"
"Th-this is good... "
"Glad it suits your taste."
"......"
"......"
"......"
"......"
But with Neria starting to watch me nervously anyway.
Despite saying it was good, her face brimmed with guilt.
If she had animal ears, they'd be drooping for sure.
The mood got this heavy over a few words.
I hated it too.
So I cleared my throat briefly, scooted my chair back a bit, and asked first.
"Lady Neria."
"Y-yeah?"
"How about this?"
"...What?"
Right between us was a problem we'd temporarily swept aside, invisible to the eye.
"You're feeling so sorry toward me, so how about I ask you something that'd put you in a tough spot too? Might make your mind feel easier."
"Something tough..., ......Why are you such a hikikomori...?"
"No, not that... Um."
We're spending time like any ordinary day now, but we can't keep going like this forever, right?
"Why do you hate men so much, Lady Neria? Mind if I hear the reason?"
Can't forget the work I have to do.
I brought it up carefully, then added a few words to soften her mood.
"I heard you were a genius, Lady Neria."
"......"
"Wasting that talent is a shame."
"......"
"Your master still has high expectations for you."
Team Leader joked about turning her into 'a body that can't live without dick!' but obviously, I don't have that power.
Unless you're some stud swapping sex partners daily, how's a guy with a few relationships supposed to manage that?
So instead of blindly pushing sex, we needed a serious talk like this at least once.
At least, that's how I saw it.
"There's... obviously a reason.... Um..."
"......"
"...Haaa."
"Is it really hard to talk about?"
"...Not hard, just kinda embarrassing."
"I see."
"......"
"......"
So on this chance, I asked gently. Neria let out a heavy sigh and set down her spoon.
She hesitated so long I thought it'd fail again today, then finally mumbled her answer.
"At first, like other witches, I planned to just handle it with semen. But... before actually doing it, I, um... studied...?"
"...You even studied."
"...Why? Can't I study?"
"No. It's just so different from how you are now, it's surprising."
"...Hmph."
It was witch-like in a way.
I'm no expert, but I know witches devote their lives to magic research.
Goodie-two-shoes raised on nothing but magic since childhood—studying what they don't know is natural.
So probably referenced internet porn or whatever.
As I vaguely imagined,
"Anyway, not just sex ed... I studied with, um, naughty novels and stuff... to get a rough idea of how it'd go..."
"...? With novels?"
"Wh-what's weird? I only read ones praised for good writing, skipped any with plot holes...?"
Because Neria said this.
"Anyway, all kinds of male leads just roughly... like this... that way... handling women harshly, trying to possess them, training them..."
"......"
"Blood even comes out at first... The usually sweet male lead turns beastly during sex... Monologues about bodies breaking apart..."
"......"
"Even when I checked videos thinking maybe novels exaggerate, nothing really different..."
She learned sex from super spicy, 10.0-rated women-oriented erotica.
...And as a result, not just the various men in those stories, but the act of sex itself for getting semen became naturally terrifying.
"......I love researching magic, but I super duper hate pain."
After Neria's innocent confession,
a long, long silence hung between us, words lost.