Satisfaction, or Onward - 3
The streets were quiet. Warm sunlight bathed us gently, and not a zombie in sight. Walking alone with Sua brought back old memories.
"So, where do you wanna go?"
"Hehe..."
Sua flashed a mischievous grin, answering with laughter instead of words.
"Y'know, I leveled up my sex slave to level 4 recently! Remember?"
"Oh... yeah!"
I remembered. It was right before heading into the dungeon. I'd pulled her into my arms without a second thought, ravaging her soft body roughly. Not just then—whenever the urge hit me, I want to fuck, Sua was always there by my side. Sure, I'd held Seohee and Roa plenty too. But Seohee had that wild, feral edge, like a untamed horse; I only went to her when I craved something stimulating. It wasn't relaxing. Roa was always busy with something. She'd accept me if I demanded her body, no refusal, but I didn't want to interrupt her work either.
In the end, Sua was the one I embraced the most.
"Already hit that level, huh."
"Sex slave level up! It unlocked a nearby supply point!"
"...For real?"
I'd heard about it, just hadn't paid much attention.
"Yeah! Might not have survival stuff, but it's packed with cosplay outfits for naughty fun!"
"Nice."
Seeing her beaming face, guilt tugged at me deep down. To me, Sua was just so comfortable. Her eyes told me she loved me. Even without that, she'd never gone against my wishes or thoughts, not once. She started out clumsy with cooking but practiced diligently. Now she handled the induction stove like a pro, and her meals were decent enough, if still a bit rough around the edges. Dishes, laundry, cleaning—boring, tedious chores, yet she never complained or slacked off. I'd try to help, but she'd finish everything before I could even touch it.
Even when Seohee was hurt. It was my shameless request, but it couldn't have been easy. Carrying Seohee around with no arms or legs, feeding her, helping her with everything—that's what she had to do, always by her side. Even I, who'd promised to save Seohee, would've grown bored and exhausted after days or weeks. But Sua stepped in for me. She always did. Sacrificing for me, and somewhere along the way, I'd started taking it for granted.
Maybe I'd grown complacent.
"Here we are! Just head inside!"
The place in front of us was a plain old clothing store. Nothing fancy, except that the pre-apocalypse stock was intact. If anything, it gave off sketchy vibes, like one of those "closing sale soon" shops where you never know when it'll actually shut down. But the clothes inside weren't your everyday wear. Rows of women's outfits with blatant holes in all the obvious places—stuff you had to wonder if anyone actually sold.
"Exactly what I hoped for!"
"Yeah... impressive."
No matter how impractical, it was still a supply point. Clothes were clothes. You couldn't fight in them or eat them to solve food shortages, but even accounting for that, this spot had real value. In this world, getting outfits like these without a sex slave level up would take serious effort.
"Does every sex slave level up unlock stuff like this?"
"Depends... on the situation!"
She shook her head with a bright smile.
"Skills from sex slave levels are basically status window skills, so they help with whatever the user desperately wants."
I glanced at the empty slot in my skill list on the status window.
Do I... not want anything?
It wasn't weird. I didn't have some burning wish that needed the status window or skills to fulfill. Except for that one time with Heea, when a skill popped up to save her—I had nothing.
"So you wanted this?"
It was intriguing. A cosplay shop was cool and all, but I never pictured Sua craving something like that.
"Of course! Well, from here on it's just hearsay, so not totally sure... but not everyone who levels up gets a 'cosplay shop.' There are conditions or whatever. Still, I wanted this!"
More precisely, it was hard to accept that Sua wanted anything at all. Not that I denied it—it just didn't compute. From the moment we met, she'd always moved for me. I couldn't fathom why she loved me so much, why she accepted everything. I didn't know what she desired.
Because she was too comfortable.
"Why?"
I asked without thinking.
"The other girls can use it too, not just me! Master will love it... we could all come as a group, match concepts and everything!"
Not even for herself this time. A sudden unease hit me, and I probed gently.
"Back at the meeting... did I seem off?"
Sua liked naughty teasing, sure, but she wasn't the type to grope my dick anytime, anywhere. If anything, she had a surprisingly clear sense of timing. Even if she was all worked up, if I said I was tired or "later," she'd back off cleanly and wait for the next chance.
"Yeah... you looked a bit worn out."
It worried me. If she was holding back for my sake, how long could she keep it up? Even her playful touches weren't selfish lust—they were consideration, born from worry for me.
"Sorry for saying this, but..."
I lightly gripped her shoulder.
"Doesn't it get tough, always sacrificing for others?"
"Huh?"
Sua's eyes filled with confusion.
Inside, An Sua was breaking into a cold sweat.
Oh no.
Her master was misunderstanding. Big time. Hugely.
How saintly does he think I am, Master?!
Until now, she'd worked hard to downplay her presence. She wanted him to barely notice her—like furniture in the house, or a bed so familiar and taken for granted you forget it exists. She never even dreamed of defying his will.
Because she feared he'd abandon her.
Because she dreaded upsetting him.
Hmm...
But she knew she felt more than that.
It's not about 'effort for others'...
An Sua didn't like the other women much. She just hid it well.
Seohee's first impression was the worst. A brute with nothing but muscle, who didn't think twice about trying to kill her man. When she lost her limbs, Sua felt secret satisfaction. But when her master ordered—or asked—her to nurse Seohee, Sua accepted without complaint. Not for Seohee. For her master. Because he wanted it, she could take it on willingly.
Roa had rubbed her wrong from the start too. Infamous woman, and her master disliked her. But when he saved her and her sister, Sua welcomed them without a peep. Smiled in front of them. Same with the orphanage folks. Useless women, she thought deep down, but never let it slip.
All because she loved her master. Not some selfless altruism for others.
"Master... do you remember when we first met?"
"Of course."
An Sua had come to this land to die. With her skills, she'd soon run out of mana and perish. No matter how well she hid, zombies always sniffed her out eventually. Even rationing mana tightly, killing only when necessary, her consumption far outpaced recovery.
She'd entered a supply point and run into a zombie. She braced for death. It was one she could've killed barehanded if she weren't on the verge of collapse.
Then she saw him.
"Just hold on a bit longer!"
"I'm alive. Alive... I survived..."
"Sob... thank you for saving me."
Tears flowed. Relief at surviving, emptiness at not dying, despair at owing this man her life—he could do anything to her now, and she couldn't resist. But he was so pure. How had someone like him survived this long? She could've manipulated him easily if she wanted.