Double Play
Carefully, carefully.
Kneeling atop Jun's head with both arms raised high in punishment, Fortuna glanced around, then slyly tried to lower her hands.
Carol's stern gaze shot over at once.
"Eek!"
"Lady Fortuna, keep those arms up properly!"
"Ugh, nooo. I hate standing like this. Waaah!"
"Throwing a tantrum won't help. If you did something wrong, you have to take your scolding for it."
Fortuna flopped down and tried throwing a fit, but Carol didn't so much as blink. She simply urged her, with a silent look, to raise her arms again.
"Hiiing. Jun! Carol's bullying For!"
Carol's ice-cold response only made Fortuna feel more wronged and miserable. She burrowed straight into her beloved husband's arms and nuzzled her face against him.
"Carol. For seems pretty sorry already. Couldn't you let her off?"
Her husband, as always, gathered her gently into his arms and spoke up in her defense. In that moment his embrace felt sturdier than any fortress wall, warmer than any bed.
Unfortunately, however—
"..."
"...For, let's keep them up just a little longer."
"Jun!"
—that sturdiness and warmth did not last long.
"Ungh! Waaah!"
"Sorry, I said I'm sorry."
Soothing Fortuna as she whined that she really, truly didn't want to do it, Jun stole a glance at Carol. Apparently pleased with his decision, she wiped away that uncanny smile of hers—mouth smiling, eyes not—and gave a satisfied nod.
Inwardly breathing a sigh of relief, Jun joined Rebecca and Dohwa, who had been watching carefully for their cue, and went back to writing their reflection essays.
Never thought I'd end up writing a reflection essay.
After delivering another knuckle sandwich to the barbarian warrior who, despite being dropped to his knees by a single punch, still wouldn't shut his mouth, Jun had handed out the same gift to the adventurers sitting with him. He would have loved to gift the surrounding adventurers who'd chimed in as well, but the guild guards—who had finally come to their senses—shouted for him to stop, so he couldn't. Even so, he couldn't simply ignore a guard's warning. Punishing the ones who'd badmouthed them had some justification, room for a little leniency. Ignoring a guard's warning had none. Do that, and they might decide he was looking down on the guild and slap him with the "contempt" charge on top of everything else. He'd already committed an offense; he had no desire to pile more on. Considering justification, power, and future prospects, he figured he could cover the punishment of those guys without much trouble—but anything beyond that would be impossible.
Not that I really needed to pile more on anyway.
Jun had swung his fists purely as a warning to everyone around them. A warning that anyone who touched him or his family would be punished without mercy, so they'd better watch themselves. Judging by the way the nearby adventurers had stared at him like he was a lunatic, the message seemed to have gotten through loud and clear. He was a little disappointed he hadn't dropped a few more of them—that would have driven the point home even harder. At any rate, no longer feeling the need to throw any more punches, Jun quietly let the guards take him into custody. Seeing that, his wives stopped their own rampage as well.
And so Jun and his wives, seized by the guards, were being hauled off to the prison in the guild's basement when—
"Are you finished?"
"Just a little more."
"This humble one still has a bit left as well."
"Same here."
—Carol came rushing in after hearing the news, and thanks to her they were spared being locked up. In exchange they ended up writing reflection essays they'd never imagined writing in their lives, but that was a hundred times better than sitting in a cell.
"Ugh. For just wants to write a reflection essay too."
"You're the one who said you didn't want to write one and would stand punishment instead, Lady Fortuna. So stand there quietly."
"But stiiill~"
"No. You. Won't! Your arms don't even hurt, do they? Stop putting on an act."
"Do too. Arms hurt."
"Haaah~. You shouldn't lie. I've already received the report that Lady Fortuna was flinging people several times her size around like rag dolls."
Having said that, Carol looked at Fortuna with eyes full of bewilderment, astonishment, and curiosity. Even at a glance, she clearly wondered how this tiny fairy could possess that kind of strength.
"For has an Aura Core too!"
"My goodness! Then are you saying Lady Fortuna is a triple-core holder just like Lord Jun?!"
"Yep!"
Seizing the moment, Fortuna announced her possession of an Aura Core and slyly lowered her arms. Carol, for whom conquering the Labyrinth was the goal of a lifetime, watched it happen plain as day and said nothing. In that instant, her perception of Fortuna had been elevated—from a fairy with special abilities to a hope of humanity on the same level as Jun. She couldn't possibly sour the mood of someone like that over something so trivial(?).
"Kahaha! This is a masterpiece! Birds of a feather, huh—turns out the fairy's a monster too!"
The Guild Master, who had been quietly watching the whole affair, burst into a hearty laugh. The sound was so loud it made their heads ring. Carol, who had been about to continue her conversation with Fortuna, couldn't take it and snapped at her.
"Guild Master, could you please keep it down? I can't even talk with Lady Fortuna."
"...Carol, you seem so worked up you've forgotten—this is the Guild Master's office. My room. My territory. If my laughing bothers you, you lot can go somewhere else."
"You're the one who seems to have forgotten, Guild Master. You're the one who dragged us in here out of nowhere when we were headed for the conference room."
"...Ah! Right, that did happen."
"I suppose at your age the dementia is starting to set in."
"A tragic thing, isn't it. Just like how you, Carol, with that tiny chest of yours, never got chosen by that kid over there."
"W-why would you bring that up all of a sudden?!"
"You brought up age first!"
Carol and the Guild Master ground their teeth and glared daggers at each other. The atmosphere between them was so vicious that Jun and his wives didn't dare insert themselves between them.
"Eek!"
"...I'll remember this."
"Look who's talking."
Only after Fortuna, having held her breath too long, started hiccupping did the two of them soften their eyes. Aware they'd made fools of themselves, a faint flush colored both their cheeks.
"Ahem, ahem. Brat."
The Guild Master cleared her throat to cover her embarrassment and called to Jun.
"Yes? What is it?"
"You done with the reflection essay? If you are, bring it here."
Jun glanced sideways at Carol, then rose from the sofa and carried the essay over to the Guild Master, who had her feet propped up on the desk like some thug. She skimmed it quickly, snorted a laugh, and asked,
"You call this a reflection essay? Looks more like a statement arguing your actions were justified to me."
"Because I don't actually think what I did was wrong."
"Even though you violated guild law."
"Yes. I had no choice if I wanted to send a warning."
"A warning? To whom? Why?"
"To anyone who looks down on me and my family, anyone who tries to use us, anyone who tries to hurt us. To let them know that if they take us lightly, they'll pay for it."
Jun answered with his whole heart, as if steeling his resolve. Sensing the sincerity in it, the Guild Master wiped the faint smile from her lips and met his eyes with an endlessly serious expression. Her one remaining blue eye was deep and dark as the ocean depths; Jun wanted to look away. But somehow he felt that if he averted his gaze here, the resolve he'd built would waver—so he clenched his teeth and held her stare.
"Brat. Every single one of those guys you punched is backed by that cockroach Merchant Coalition. And among the women your girls threw around, there was a noble family's child. The Merchant Coalition and a noble house. Both are a pain in the ass to deal with."
"So?"
"Even if you're under the Church's Special Protection Status and a priority support target of the guild, I can't wrap up the sanctions with a single reflection essay. Even if both groups let it slide, the people who watched this whole thing from the sidelines will definitely start chirping about how unfair it is."
"What are you trying to say?"
"No more, no less—just once. When I tell you to bow your head, you bow your head. Do that, and big sis here will take care of everything else."
It was a reasonable proposal. No—an extremely advantageous one. If a single formal, empty apology could silence both groups and the people's complaints on top of that, it was a deal that paid off several times over. If he'd been alone it might have been different, but with a family he was responsible for, he couldn't help but hesitate.
As he sank into thought, his wives spoke up.
"Jun, why are you even thinking about it?"
"It is a proposal not even worth considering."
"My love, do not forget that you are our representative."
Jun turned and looked at his wives. Every one of them was watching him with eyes that held not the slightest flicker of doubt. Thanks to that, Jun was able to choose.
"I'd rather go to prison."
"You serious? Big sis doesn't offer twice."
"Yes. I may break, but I won't bend."
"...Kahaha! Nice. I like it a lot! 'I may break, but I won't bend!' Hell yeah, that's a line! That's what I call a motto. Yeah—an adventurer needs that kind of spirit! Damn right they do!"
After a moment of silence at his answer, the Guild Master suddenly burst out laughing. At the same time she tore Jun's reflection essay to shreds in her hands and scattered the pieces behind her.
"...Does that mean I'm going to prison?"
"No need! You made big sis laugh her ass off, so forget about sanctions."
"Is that really okay? Those two groups and the other adventurers are going to have a lot of complaints."
"Those two groups are just a pain to deal with—I can shut them up just fine. As for the other small fry, if they've got a problem they can come talk to me! The Guild Master's letting it go, so who the hell do they think they are talking back?!"
The Guild Master laughed heartily, as if there were no problem at all. She looked so dependable that even knowing she was roughly the same age as Leonard, Jun's heart gave a sudden thump.
"Brat. From now on, if there's someone you don't like, just drop 'em on the spot. Big sis will handle the cleanup for you."
"Really? Is that actually okay?"
"Yeah! Oh, right. For that you'll need more power, won't you."
The Guild Master grinned and pulled a book from her desk drawer, holding it out to Jun. The moment he read the title on the cover, Jun cried out,
"Big sis!"