I Dreamed Again
I had another dream. But this time, it was different. The succubus version of me and the version of me with pure white angel wings were both staring at “me.”
The succubus, wearing a seductive smile, spoke first.
“Woke up already? Sleepyhead.”
“Are you me?”
“I’m not ‘you.’ I’m Kyubey.”
“I am Uriel.”
The one with angel wings introduced herself with a completely expressionless face. What the hell was this situation?
“Do you remember who you are?”
“I am… Elisha.”
My head was spinning and my memories were a complete mess, but if I had to claim a name, it was Elisha.
“That’s right, Elisha. Do you understand what’s happening right now?”
“So the single ‘us’ has split apart and we’re all talking to each other?”
“I expected you to be slower since you’re a bit dense, but you caught on surprisingly fast. As expected of my original self.”
“At the very least, I have no desire to be the same kind of existence as you.”
Uriel glared at Kyubey with clear displeasure and shot back in a calm, measured voice. Kyubey simply laughed and draped an arm around Uriel’s shoulder.
“Hehe, our little sister doesn’t like her big sister very much?”
“Who decided you were the big sister? Get your arm off me.”
“I wonder whose fault it is that our ego has split like this? Hmm?”
“Tsk.”
Uriel swatted Kyubey’s arm away, furrowed her brow deeply, and clicked her tongue. Come to think of it, could an ego split become this distinct? Distinct enough for them to hold an actual conversation?
“This ego split… is it because of the brainwashing?”
“Probably. The forcibly implanted memories of our youngest likely triggered a self-defense mechanism that caused the separation. And I got dragged along for the ride.”
“Why did Kyubey split off too…?”
“Strictly speaking, I’m also a personality created by brainwashing. Until now I’d barely managed to hold on as a single personality, but the appearance of our youngest shattered that.”
“It’s not as if I wanted to split either. And according to the original plan, both Elisha and Kyubey were supposed to disappear, leaving only me.”
From a third-person perspective, the two of them looked like an angel and a demon bickering. I watched the complete succubus—purple skin, horns and all—argue with the pure-white-skinned Uriel and her large angel wings, then suddenly grew curious about my own appearance. When I looked down at myself, I saw the body I’d had right before entering the modification device. Even in a dream, my limbs were prosthetic. The feeling was strangely unsettling.
The two continued their quarrel, eventually clashing over their opinions about God.
“My goal is to kill God, so you’ll just have to endure it.”
“Hmph. As an archangel who serves God, I cannot accept that.”
“What’s so great about that selfish cyborg? He isn’t even a real god anyway.”
“How can you say that when you know his achievements? The secret work he has done for the stability of this world deserves to be revered beyond heroism—it deserves to be worshipped as divine. Repent, demon.”
“The problem is that among those achievements are things that make even demons say ‘that’s too far.’ Honestly, I don’t think I’ve done anything that truly deserves to be called demonic.”
“It’s foolish to lie while sharing the same memories. Did you not drown in pleasure and entwine your body with other men despite having a husband? If possible, I would like to erase those memories.”
They were as incompatible as water and oil. But right now the urgent issue wasn’t their argument—it was resolving the current situation.
“Both of you, stop. The urgent matter is solving our present condition. Even after the modification ends, our egos will probably remain split. If that happens, who will control the body?”
At my question the two stopped arguing and glared at each other before offering their opinions one by one.
“The dominant personality is Elisha, but both I and Uriel can interfere with bodily control. In other words, Uriel can obstruct the killing of God.”
“I will never allow it.”
“Get a grip, you idiot. You share the same body with us—you’re part of the same fate. What are you going to do if you keep interfering?”
“Are you not simply trying to kill the god who, out of boundless mercy, granted us an immortal, indestructible divine body?”
“Not to mention the brainwashing that came with it.”
They started fighting again. I left them to it and thought to myself. Unlike them, I possessed all the memories, yet I felt neither Kyubey’s blind murderous intent toward God nor Uriel’s blind devotion. It was as if the brainwashing had been diluted. When the single ego split, the conditioning that had been forced upon it seemed to have weakened inside my own personality.
Besides, God’s achievements for the sake of the world were not something that could be easily dismissed. He had been secretly killing the monsters that poured through dimensional gates—the ones Eden’s main computer predicted—and closing those gates. He had created Eden and carried out inhumane experiments solely to gain the power to protect the world, driven by a hero’s sense of duty. His intentions had been good, but his methods had been terrible. A classic example.
“Both of you, stop fighting and listen. In order to ensure our safety and achieve our goals, God’s existence must disappear. That much is essential. And while I agree his actions have been noble, they haven’t been entirely so. Correct?”
“Tch.”
Uriel clicked her tongue again to show her displeasure but could not refute my words. On the other hand, Kyubey folded her arms and nodded repeatedly, clearly pleased.
“However, we don’t necessarily have to kill him. The important thing is that ‘God is dead and a new ruler has taken control of a new Eden.’”
“What? But God is our enemy. Enemies must be thoroughly eliminated.”
“Sometimes compromise is necessary, Kyubey. You know that excessive murderous intent toward an enemy is an effect of the brainwashing. And since Uriel is opposed, killing him will be difficult anyway.”
“So you’re suggesting we seize Eden without killing him?”
“Exactly. What God wants is the fulfillment of his hero complex—blocking dimensional gates and protecting the world. Looking at how he’s been neglecting Eden’s management, it’s clear he finds everything else bothersome.”
From Uriel’s memories and my own experiences, God maintained Eden only because he needed the technology. He had no real interest in ruling. He had even grown tired of management, allowing internal division and corruption to run rampant.
“Then what exactly are you suggesting? It’s still true that God is an obstacle.”
“I will persuade him directly.”
Both Kyubey and Uriel widened their eyes in shock. Seeing the two—who shared my face but had different skin colors—make the exact same astonished expression was rather amusing.
“Hmm, our Elisha can be a little eccentric, can’t she?”
“I wouldn’t say that, but he is extremely self-willed and rarely listens to others.”
“Then we’ll make him listen. Even if we have to beat it into him.”
I raised my fist and shook it. Kyubey burst out laughing.
“Kyahaha! I like that idea! Let’s beat him black and blue!”
Uriel looked at Kyubey with clear disapproval before speaking calmly.
“His body feels no pain. However, if his immense pride suffers the humiliation of losing to a mere angel, he may at least be willing to listen.”
Uriel had revealed that she would not interfere if the method did not involve killing God. Kyubey agreed that if he could be turned from an enemy through persuasion, there was no need to kill him.
“Good. Then it’s decided. First, we defeat God.”
“But what about the ego split? The fastest solution would be for our youngest to disappear.”
“I have no intention of disappearing.”
“You bitch. After causing this whole situation, you have the nerve to say that?”
“Strictly speaking, it is because of the one who created me.”
“Using the person you claim to adore so much as an excuse. What a ridiculous bitch.”
“Stop calling me a bitch, you bitch.”
In the end they started pulling each other’s hair. Sigh. It was exhausting to think that these two were the same existence as me. Still, this space was probably only maintained during the modification process, yet it had lasted quite a while. Was the modification taking that long?
“Hey! Don’t grab my horns!”
“Then let go of my wings!”
Hmm. Were they going to play around as soon as the modification finished? Or perhaps they were giving me time to adapt.
“Ow! Wait! Let go first and talk!”
“We release at the same time.”
“One, two, three!”
They let go simultaneously and separated. Kyubey clutched her horns while Uriel smoothed out her ruffled feathers.
“Are you two done? You’re not children—why are you fighting so much?”
“It’s because of her that I got split off. And then she says she won’t disappear? Of course I’m upset.”
“Hmph. Aren’t you angry because you can no longer freely control and devour Elisha?”
“Do you have any idea how hard I worked to change Elisha? Even her marriage to Havid was thanks to my efforts.”
“Hmph. Does a succubus who suppressed the gentle Elisha and pursued only pleasure have any right to say that?”
Uriel was right—the relationship between Kyubey and me was complicated. Until the split, we had been one and the same, but strictly speaking Kyubey had been the dominant personality. Yet it hadn’t been entirely wrong. The blindly obedient me had become slightly more independent after becoming Kyubey. I had used absolute hypnosis to control my master and skillfully manipulated him into a gentler state. Though the methods were highly unethical, it was undeniable that the once purely passive me had gained an active side.
“Even if Uriel disappears now, there’s no guarantee that Kyubey and I will merge back together. Besides, we need Uriel’s memories right now.”
“However, the longer Uriel exists, the more the memories will separate and the higher the chance her ego will become independent and permanent. It would be better to erase the memories sooner rather than later.”
“I cannot disappear until I confirm his safety.”
Uriel’s expression remained calm, but a trace of sadness leaked into her voice. As a personality created through brainwashing, I could somewhat understand the reason for that sadness. A newly born ego that had been denied its very existence would feel utterly devastated.
“It doesn’t have to be disappearance. If we look, there will be another way. For now, let’s focus only on persuading God as we agreed. All right?”
“Can’t be helped. Fine.”
While Kyubey agreed reluctantly, Uriel let out a clearly relieved sigh. Her blind devotion reminded me of my past self, so it didn’t feel like someone else’s problem. Kyubey, who had been scratching the back of her head while watching Uriel’s behavior much like I had, looked around the pure white space and spoke.
“More importantly, when does this end?”
“Probably when the modification is complete?”
“It feels like it’s been a while already. It’s taking a long time.”
“As you all know, converting the body into a top-spec full-body prosthesis is an extremely complex process requiring meticulous adjustments. In particular, stabilizing the bio-meta that connects the nervous system to the prosthetic sensors takes even longer.”
“Ah, I do have some similar memories coming in, but they feel unfamiliar.”
“That is only natural since they are merely injected knowledge.”
As Kyubey said, the knowledge implanted through Uriel included information about prostheses. However, simply possessing knowledge and having internalized it through practice were two different things. With memories and knowledge scattered in pieces, it was hard to understand. Moreover, now that we had split, the injected memories had fragmented even further and become even more ambiguous.
“The full-body prosthesis technology created by concentrating all of Eden’s resources to build his body is practically a divine power. It perfectly mimics the human body while overcoming the limits of living beings, granting the power to become a superhuman. In truth, he is still concealing a great deal of his strength.”
“So against us he was literally just playing around?”
“Correct. If he had struck with genuine intent, the impacted area would have exploded and caused instant death.”
“No wonder he closes dimensional gates by himself.”
At that moment, a chair and table appeared in the center of the previously empty white space. While I was startled and wondering what was happening, Kyubey spoke.
“As expected of a mental space—something like this is possible. Let’s sit and talk.”
“Did you do this?”
“I am a succubus, a specialist in mental matters. Because of Elisha’s influence I’ve been behaving unnaturally docile, but if I put my mind to it, turning humans into slaves is child’s play.”
We had been the same existence until recently, yet our values differed so drastically. My feelings were complicated. The three of us sat in the chairs and continued our conversation.
“So what exactly is going to happen to our body?”
“The limbs that were only reinforced prosthetics will be remade into a top-spec full-body prosthesis. The brain will be housed and protected inside a specially manufactured cranial capsule, controlling the body through the nervous system.”
“Why leave the brain and nervous system?”
“The technology to completely replace them is still insufficient. He also dislikes the idea.”
“So at least the brain remains biological? That’s a strangely ethical consideration.”
Kyubey waved her hand over the table, and cups of coffee along with snacks appeared. Oh, this was truly fascinating. The aroma of steaming hot coffee smelled genuinely fragrant. After briefly marveling at the realistic coffee, we continued talking.
“What does it mean to leave some internal organs?”
“The digestive system and reproductive organs.”
“Those are difficult to replace too?”
“The technology exists, but again, it is his preference.”
“What a strange taste. Still, I’m glad the reproductive organs are left intact. By the way, is God really that virile?”
“He is beyond comparison with ordinary humans.”
“How does he compare with our virility king Havid? He’s practically superhuman.”
“Why is Master suddenly being brought up?”
Why did the conversation suddenly flow in that direction? Kyubey licked her lips.
“When you see a man like that, of course you want to taste him, right?”
“That’s just you, Kyubey.”
“Vulgar.”
“You two are the ones acting all prim and proper. Especially you, Elisha—you have no right!”
“What did I do?”
“Who was it that said she loved both Teo and Havid? Your taste for strong males has always been there.”
“Isn’t that the same for you, Kyubey?”
“Hmph. I like anything that tastes good. Man or woman—if it tastes good, that’s enough.”
“Vulgar.”
Uriel kept repeating “vulgar” with a look of utter disgust. Hmm. No matter how much she had been part of me, Kyubey really seemed too lustful. Was that a succubus trait? Kyubey ignored our reactions and asked Uriel again.
“So how is he? Tell me.”
“There are too many variables to compare him directly with that Blackman, so it is difficult. Still, personally I believe God is superior.”
“Don’t call him Blackman—call him by his name, Havid. He’s my husband.”
“I have no interest in any man other than God.”
When Uriel called Master “Blackman,” Kyubey flared up in anger. So she really did call him her husband.
“It looks like you like Master even more than I do.”
“You’re nothing but Havid’s slave. I’m the one who received his love and his proposal.”
Kyubey looked down on me and declared it proudly. She could say that, but leaving the moment his back was turned to have sex with other men didn’t seem right.
“Anyway, we’ll find out about God’s stamina when we attend him at night, won’t we?”
“I will be the one attending him at night.”
“Who said they’d yield?”
“You should go after other men. His partner is me.”
The two began a staring contest over who would have sex with God. But since there was only one body, did dividing it even have meaning? Wait, this coffee cup… it was from the café in our quarters. Was it being pulled from memory? Then if I imagined something strongly…
I stared at the table and strongly visualized the image of coffee in my mind. With a cute popping sound, an identical cup of coffee appeared.
“Whoa! I did it too!”
“Oh, for your first time you’re pretty good, considering you’re Elisha.”
“Isn’t ‘considering you’re Elisha’ a bit harsh?”
“Honestly, I can’t trust you at all.”
“Ehh… that’s too much.”
I lifted the coffee cup proudly, but Uriel, who had been staring at me, closed her eyes and furrowed her brow deeply. Then the entirely white space began to transform. Walls and a ceiling appeared, furniture materialized, and the resulting space became God’s bedroom. Of all places, why did it have to be the bedroom where he slept?
Uriel, who had opened her eyes and checked her surroundings, spoke triumphantly.
“Hehe, I can do at least this much.”
“It’s fine and all, but why his bedroom of all places? At least make it my husband’s room.”
“Honestly, isn’t God more handsome than that man?”
“That’s true.”
Kyubey immediately nodded in agreement at Uriel’s obviously evasive words.
“What’s wrong with Master that you keep doing this?”
“To worship a man who raped you and treats you as a slave—you must be out of your mind.”
“You really have a sharp tongue, you know? And Elisha was born an angel slave, so it can’t be helped. No matter how hard I tried, her nature wouldn’t change.”
“Then that slave nature can be used to serve God.”
“The truth is you’re not exactly sane either.”
I ignored the two who kept insulting me and jumped onto the bed. Whoa, the bed felt real too. So soft and fluffy. I lay down, wrapped myself in the blanket, and felt sleep gently pulling at me.
“Shall we drink some alcohol? They say alcohol is best for getting closer.”
“I have no desire to get closer to you.”
“Honestly, you’re a virgin, right? I’ll teach you my techniques for captivating men.”
“Really?”
Uh-oh. It looked like an angel falling for a demon’s temptation. I was too sleepy to keep watching.