No Way Home
That thing... it's a yasgak. Yasgak!
……………
'Ha... I completely ruined the mood I was trying to set.'
We barely spoke for the rest of the meal. Once we'd paid and left the restaurant, Catalina suddenly stopped.
"Hey..."
"That thing you said earlier... it wasn't entirely a joke, was it?"
"What?"
"The marriage talk."
My heart sank. How the hell was I supposed to navigate this conversation smoothly?
"Oh, that. Look, I just... felt bad seeing you stuck living like this. I wanted to let you know there were other options out there."
I muddled through it. Catalina dipped her head slightly. I couldn't see her expression.
"Yeah. Thanks."
Her voice was small. Then she started walking again. Watching her back as she led the way, I thought to myself: I need to get out of Santa Esperanza fast. Before things get any more complicated.
……………
About an hour after we got back to the safehouse, I showered and collapsed onto the sofa. The springs creaked, but I didn't care. As the tension drained from my body, exhaustion hit me like a wave.
Only now did it really sink in. Everything that had happened today.
The delivery, the fight, the bodies. El Gordito's offer, and my dumb marriage joke with Catalina's face turning beet red.
For some reason, I wasn't feeling any PTSD or shell shock yet. Maybe Ma Hyuksu was just that tough to begin with, or maybe it was my influence.
'Anyway, this clusterfuck is finally over.'
That super sketchy white brick delivery job? Done. Things with La Luna Negra? More or less wrapped up.
All I had to do now was get the guide's contact from Catalina. Call for a pickup, and bolt out of Santa Esperanza at dawn tomorrow.
Sure, I'd miss Catalina a little. But she was a cartel mercenary, and I was just a tourist who'd gotten dragged into this mess. That's how fleeting connections work.
Once I escaped back to Korea, I'd change the phone number I'd traded with the cartel boss, and maybe keep in touch with Catalina every now and then.
The TV droned on with some telenovela. Over-the-top acting and predictable plots, but at least it beat the sporadic gunfire outside.
That's when Catalina grabbed her phone and headed to her room. The door didn't latch fully, and I faintly caught her voice.
"...Yeah, he's here with me..."
Right, he's with me. Who was she talking to? El Gordito? Some other client? None of my business anyway. I wasn't about to pry into her private life, especially since I probably wouldn't see her after tomorrow.
"...No, I'm not letting you go. You'll have to cooperate..."
No, I'm not letting you go. You'll cooperate.
I deliberately tuned out the conversation and cranked up the TV volume. Cartel and mercenary business. I was done getting involved. This had nothing to do with me.
About ten minutes later, Catalina emerged from her room. Her expression was the same as always.
Finally. Time to get to the point.
"Cata."
"Yeah?"
"Delivery's done, so can I have that note with the guide's contact?"
She froze for a split second. Then she shrugged.
"Oh, that? Hold on."
Surprisingly compliant, she dug into her pocket and pulled out the familiar scrap of paper.
"Here."
It landed in my hand.
"Thanks."
I whipped out my phone and punched in the number. The ringtone dragged on.
"...Hello?"
The guide's voice. I'd never been so happy to hear another human being.
"This is Ma Hyuksu. The guy you dropped off in Santa Esperanza--"
"What? You're still there? You're alive?"
"Yeah. Alive. So I'd like a pickup tomorrow morning."
"Fine. But... you haven't gotten tangled up with the local cartel, have you?"
"Uh, well..."
What should I say? Lie? Come clean?
As if reading my mind, the guide's tone hardened.
"Tell the truth. If I find out midway, I'll dump you on the roadside."
"...It got complicated. I had to help with a delivery."
"What? Delivery?"
"Yeah. And there was a fight. Los Ermanos and La Luna Negra clashing."
Silence on the line.
"And?"
"I... exchanged contacts with a cartel boss."
"Not El Gordito?"
"You know him. Yeah, that guy."
The guide let out a long sigh.
"Sorry, but we can't help you."
"What?"
"Anyone tied to cartels is off-limits for our service. Especially big outfits like La Luna Negra. We value our lives too."
"Wait, no. You can't just drop me like this!"
"Sorry, it's beyond what we can handle."
"I'm just a tourist! You know that! I got swept up in this!"
"...Good luck."
"Wait! Please--"
Click. The line went dead.
I redialed, but it just rang. After three or four tries, I was blocked.
I sat there on the sofa, phone in hand, staring blankly. My last lifeline was severed.
No way out of this city now.
Santa Esperanza. My prison.
"What happened?"
Catalina asked. She was sipping a beer, watching me.
"Didn't work out?"
"...Guide turned me down. Said I'm tied to the cartel, can't pick me up."
"Ah... I see."
She seemed oddly calm. No surprise, just matter-of-fact.
"Well, not sure if this comforts you, but it's not the absolute worst. You're still alive, right? All your limbs intact."
She slid onto the sofa beside me and handed over a beer. The cold glass chilled my palm. One swig, and the bitterness slid down my throat.
"Stick with me, and you won't die at least. I guarantee it."
Her tone was still light. But that casualness felt weirdly heavy.
A prison without bars. That was my situation now.
……………
Ma Hyuksu's life was over.
Scammed a cartel boss with an AI photo, got dragged into a cartel war, and even the one escape route—the guide—ditched me.
Two paths left.
Get swept up in the La Luna Negra and Los Ermanos war and die like a dog in the gutter.
Or have El Gordito find out I lied and get my limbs hacked off.
"This fucking..."
A beer bottle rolled across the floor. I'd lost count of how many.
Santa Esperanza. The world's most dangerous city.
And now... Ma Hyuksu's grave.
Even dying cleanly seemed impossible.
"Ha..."
If I was doomed to die horribly anyway, maybe it'd be better to just go quick and roll into the next life.
Risemara. In games, deleting your account and restarting until you get the character you want.
Maybe that's what I needed. Ditch this ruined account, ruined life, ruined Ma Hyuksu, and start fresh.
'There's the pistol.'
Colt M1911. The one from the guide. Still had bullets.
Just stick it in my mouth and pull the trigger. Wouldn't even take a second.
Lost in those thoughts, I stared into space. The TV had been off for ages; only the fluorescent light flickered dimly.
"Wanna die?"
It was Catalina. No idea when she'd come out and started watching.
"What're you talking about?"
"You've had that look since earlier."
"What look?"
"The look someone who killed themselves yesterday had."
Straight to the point. Classic her.
"...You've seen a lot of those, huh."
"In this city? Obviously. Someone chatting normally yesterday turns up a corpse in a ditch today."
She sat beside me. The sofa creaked.
"Cata, don't worry about it. It's my problem."
"Can't do that. If you die, I'm in trouble too."
Also classic Catalina. Not like I'd ever expected sappy comfort anyway.
"I won't say 'hang in there' or 'it'll be okay'—that's bullshit. Dying today or tomorrow makes no difference."
I took another swig of beer without replying. Even the bitterness was numb now.
"But hey, if you're gonna die anyway, why not have some fun first? Try drugs, bang some girls, shoot guns wild. Dying after that's not too late, right?"
Total dogshit advice. But weirdly, it made sense.
If death was coming... why not do whatever?
At least it wasn't false hope.
"It's just you."
The words slipped out. I was even surprised by them myself. Booze? Despair? Who knows.
But it was true. In this insane city, Catalina was the only person I really knew.
Her expression shifted subtly. How to describe it? Beautiful, but twisted in some eerie ecstasy.
With that look, Catalina peeled her back off the sofa and leaned toward me.
"Right? Seems like I'm all you've got right now."
She stood, then straddled my lap. Facing me, wrapping her legs around like a spider trapping prey.
"You're all I've got too."
It sounded like a bizarre confession. Love? Or just two cornered people grasping desperately?
One thing was clear, though.
Catalina had undone my belt and pants.
"Don't be depressed. Have your fun with this."
Her weight pressed down, sinking the sofa deep. Warmth radiated from her thighs against mine.
Truth be told, I wasn't in the mood for messing around with her tonight either.
But what was the point of turning her down?
No tomorrow anyway.
Doomed to die.
Her lips met mine. Our breaths tangled.
I didn't resist anymore.
No reason to.
Distant gunfire echoed outside. Business as usual in Santa Esperanza's night.
And amid the shots, we devoured each other.