Please, Anything But That
I received no punishment today. Inha left for work saying that, thanks to me crying, she would make it to The Company just in time.
So only I was left alone in the room, and thus began a confinement that felt dreadfully comfortable for my body.
There was nothing I could do. No television, no computer, no phone—nothing existed for me but daydreams. The sound-absorbing panels covering every wall made it impossible even to count the patterns on the wallpaper.
I sat there blankly. My eyes stayed fixed on those panels that threatened to pull me into a magic-eye illusion, yet my mind was wholly occupied with the punishment waiting for me when Inha returned.
It was the same sensation that had ruled me as a child, walking home with a completely ruined report card. My heart pounded; breathing grew difficult. Not long after I had sent her off, that feeling seized me so completely that I feared I would truly go mad if it continued. I crawled back onto the bed on trembling limbs.
The restraints made ordinary movement a little awkward. Once I was on the bed and had pulled the blanket up to my eyes, the scent of my own skin mixed with the faint trace of Inha’s perfume.
Ah. I wished someone, anyone, would just hold me tight. I imagined the door suddenly bursting open, two or three male officers rushing in, staring at me in shock, radioing frantically, and then a female officer arriving a few minutes later to drape a blanket around my shoulders.
Then I would surely bury myself in that officer’s arms and sob my heart out. I longed for human warmth. I wanted to be held snugly by someone whose eyes were full of pity and compassion rather than damp lust, and to whine that it had all been so hard.
Why had I drunk that day? Why? What had I been thinking? If only I hadn’t smoked that cigarette there. If only, instead of the bus I had suddenly wanted to ride, I had hurried to the station for the crowded subway.
Every time those thoughts rose, my breath grew strangely short. No matter how hard I inhaled and exhaled, it never felt like enough, until finally I threw the blanket off and panted open-mouthed.
Was this the start of hyperventilation? Somehow I managed to pull the covers back over my head and squeezed my eyes shut. I hugged the blanket tighter against my cheek and repeated to myself that the lights weren’t out—I had simply covered myself with the blanket. Then, suddenly, Inha’s voice came from the pet camera.
Heeyeon?
I stayed still, wondering if it was another auditory hallucination, until the voice came again. Only then did I push the blanket aside, scramble up onto my knees on the bed, and answer while looking at the camera.
Yeah, what are you doing?
“I-I, um, just… lying down… uh…”
Resting?
“Yes… yes! Yes!”
Hmm, I see. Not hungry? Unnie’s heading out for lunch now.
“Ah, ahaha… n-no, I’m not hungry…”
I answered while unconsciously scratching my cheek. Was it already lunchtime? Why was time moving so fast? I was sure I had only just sent her off a few minutes ago.
Okay. Rest well. I’ll come home a little early today. Want anything to eat?
“…Um, that, well, uh… a h-hamburger…?”
She had asked what I wanted, so I answered. I never imagined she would punish me simply for saying what I wanted to eat.
Ah, got it. Unnie’ll pick one up on the way. See you later?
“Yes, yeees…”
I fidgeted with my fingers as I answered, and the sense of her gaze left the pet camera. It rotated a little on its own; when I moved to lie down again, it tracked me.
When it moved automatically like that, did it mean she wasn’t watching the screen?
I lay back down on the bed, my mind circling endlessly around what kind of punishment would come after I ate the hamburger she brought.
“Ugh… nngh…”
Without realizing it I had fallen asleep and woken again. Disliking the stiffness in my body, I stretched my arms and legs with a groan and opened my eyes.
“You awake?”
“Hiek…!”
Inha’s voice came from right beside me. I startled so hard the bed shook, yet the room was empty. The pet camera only now turned its head toward me, so the sound hadn’t come from there either.
“…U-Unnie?”
I spoke just in case, but no answer returned. Only then did I let out a long sigh and lean my back against the wall.
“…”
I tried hard not to think of anything. When I tried hard enough, I could sometimes clear my head a little—and that was when the door suddenly burst open.
“Oh? You’re up? You were sleeping earlier.”
“Ah, uh? Ah…?”
“Pfft, no, when I checked the camera a bit ago you were asleep, but you’ve woken up already. Here, I bought hamburgers.”
A paper bag of burgers hung from Inha’s hand. And a familiar brown delivery box as well. Another dildo? Or maybe she had simply bought daily necessities.
“You like Big Macs, right?”
There were too many ways she could have known for me to bother wondering. She jerked her chin in a gesture that meant unfold the table, so I grunted and struggled with my bound hands until the table was open.
Inha set the box of unknown contents down by the door and sat facing me. The outdoor chill still clinging to her body washed over me.
“Y-yes…”
“Mm, I got the set.”
She answered. Without meaning to I glanced up at her face; she was watching me with an ordinary smile. A face that gave no hint she would soon be spanking my backside.
So once again I finished the meal under that uncomfortable gaze, with my uncomfortable hands. The cola tasted good enough that my heart eased a little.
Even when I said I could do it myself, Inha cleared the table and then came to lie beside me. She wrapped an arm around my chest, buried her face against the nape of my neck, and drew a deep breath. Goosebumps rose on my skin.
—
“Shall we do the punishment now?”
In the quiet room, where the only sound had been the video playing on her phone, that voice rang out. My body, nestled in her arms while we watched together, flinched; I turned my head to look up at Inha, who was holding me from behind.
“Ah, fuck. That face is too cute.”
Apparently my terrified expression pleased her. She chuckled and kneaded both my cheeks with her hands. Being treated like a castrated male was one thing, but if it stayed at this level I could have endured it forever.
When she finally released my cheeks, I managed to open my mouth and ask.
“Th-then… n-now…?”
“Yeah. Hehe. So, first—five spanks on the butt?”
“…Y-yes, yeees…”
She had phrased it like a question, but I knew perfectly well I had no choice, so I answered that way.
“Then, hmm, shall we lie down?”
Inha rose slowly from her place, slipped her hands under my armpits, and lifted me bodily onto the bed.
With trembling arms I turned myself over and lay face-down. She gripped my hips, pulled them up onto her knees, and kneaded my buttocks. Every now and then she tapped lightly at my entrance; the shame made my face burn hotter and hotter.
“Just five hits. For now.”
Right—this wasn’t even the last remaining punishment, so I had to grit my teeth and endure.
I was steeling myself when sudden heat flared. A stinging pain bloomed across my cheek. Even with my mouth clamped shut, a whimper of “hngk” slipped out.
“One.”
Her voice from behind.
Then another sharp smack, landing without the slightest error on the exact same spot. I shoved my face into the mattress as if trying to bury it; Inha passed a pillow forward, and I clamped it between my arms and hid my face. She stroked my hair.
“Mm, two. Now three.”
The palm came down again. At my muffled “kngh,” she burst out laughing. Asking if it hurt that much, she trailed a finger down the small of my back.
After the fourth, the fifth landed and I immediately rolled over. Ignoring the tears that made my vision waver, I awkwardly stroked my own backside with my bound hands, as if only that could put out the fire clinging to my skin. Seeing my awkward posture, Inha stroked my buttocks for me.
“Hoo… hooo…!”
“You took it well this time, though. Right? Before, even one hit had you squirming.”
“Ngh, y-yes, yeees…!”
“It was cute, though. Mm. Good girl.”
“…”
Honestly, being spoken to like a little child barely even registered as annoying. I would rather she truly treated me like a child and was a little kinder—while I was thinking that, she continued.
“Then, shall we do the next punishment too?”
“…Ngh.”
Strangely, the moment I heard those words something rose in my throat. Still I forced it down and asked what the punishment would be. Please, please let it not be hard. No—hard was fine, as long as it didn’t hurt.
“Mm, wait just a second.”
Inha rose from her seat, walked a few steps, and picked up the box she had brought earlier. She returned to the bed, sat me up, and began picking at the end of the tape with her fingernail.
Please, please. Let it just be something ordinary. At least the box bore the logo of a well-known delivery company, so it couldn’t be anything too strange.
Riiip. When the tape finally came free, another layer of packaging half-rose from inside the box.
“U-um, Unnie. Th-this, what… what is this…?”
“Just… a second…!”
Perhaps she had grown a little impatient. She tore the wrapping with force, and a thick machine that looked like an electronic cigarette slid free. Something else that had been packaged separately inside the wrapping tumbled onto the bed.
Four long needles linked together. The sight, so reminiscent of a syringe, made me suck in a sharp breath.
Inha pulled the needles from their clear packaging, fitted them to the machine, and pressed a button. I knew at once what it was. I let out an “ah,” and then, truly, truly thinking that this alone could not be allowed—
I dropped to my knees and pressed my forehead to the bed toward her. Both hands met my brow. My chest touched my knees, but that meant nothing. My body shook violently. My heart pounded again—thud-thud. I made a sound, but my heartbeat was so loud I couldn’t even tell if I was pronouncing the words properly.
“U-Unnie. Please, th-that, please not that, a-anything else, I b-beg you. P-please.”
“Hm? Eh? No. This doesn’t hurt much.”
Pain was not the problem. Even trapped like this, my heart was still thinking of the life after rescue; I would rather have endured the gut-twisting agony of being filled with a dildo.
“I-I’ll do anything. So please—”
“Can you lie down properly? I can’t do it on your back.”
As she spoke she pressed the button once more; the rapidly reciprocating needles stopped. She carefully fitted an ink cartridge into the machine.
“I’ll just write my name. It won’t even take ten minutes.”
No matter how I thought about it, there was no gesture more desperate than full prostration, so the tears came flooding out again.