Strange, and Pitiful (3)
Three days had passed since we began traveling together. Serin, whom I had initially pegged as quiet and demure, now acted with vibrant exuberance, as though she had acclimated to our circumstances entirely.
"Excuse me, Rian. Could we watch the acrobats over there for just a little while before we head on?"
"Do you not wish to return quickly?"
"Well, I do want to go back, of course... but since we're already out here, wouldn't it be nice to enjoy ourselves just a tiny bit?"
My mind worked rapidly to process her request.
In all likelihood, the answer has already been decided.
Under ordinary circumstances, one should have rejected her outright, given that no one could predict when the Emperor's patience might wear thin. Yet, from what I had deduced, Serin was suffering relentless, cruel abuse within the Imperial Palace. Guiding her by standard logic would hardly serve her best interests.
Refusing a plea from someone so pitiful was simply beyond me.
"I see... Then I shall accompany you. However, please mind your surroundings. Pickpockets are common wherever crowds gather."
"Just trust me! I'm keeping the Silver Token you gave me safe and sound, you know."
"You must use it—without fail, absolutely—only when things become truly unbearable."
"...? Sure, will do."
Hearing Serin's earnest promise eased the weight on my chest. I only hoped that this brief escapade might lighten the burdens weighing upon her heart as well.
"Pardon me for a moment."
"Ah, wait, Rian...?!"
Without hesitation, I took Serin by the hand. It was a purely practical precaution to keep her from getting lost.
As we wove deeper through the packed throngs, color rose swiftly to her cheeks. The crush of bodies seemed to generate considerable heat, so much so that even after we reached the very front row, Serin appeared thoroughly overwhelmed, struggling to look straight ahead.
"Hey, Rian. Are you always like this? Just, you know, grabbing a girl's hand out of nowhere and pulling her along?"
Serin fanned her flushed face vigorously before adding in a murmur, "Not that I dislike it or anything. I was just wondering how often you do this."
"In my entire life, I believe this is only the second time."
"That's surprisingly few... Then who was the first?"
A subtle chill crept into her tone as she inquired about the first. Her slightly slanted gaze betrayed a distinct prickle of discontent. Reaching back into the archives of memory, I recounted the tale in an even voice.
"She was the daughter of a ruined noble house. A lady subjected to military servitude amidst the bitter cold."
Once, there existed a knightly house known as the Sword of the Deposed Emperor. When the former reign collapsed, the ruin of a lineage so utterly loyal to the past regime had been inevitable.
Overnight, the young lady—the sole surviving bloodline—found herself saddled with her family's crushing debts. A court decreed that she must endure grueling military service until every copper was repaid.
Seeing that young lady withering away like a parched, dead tree, I had reached out my hand. If I had to tally the order of whose hands I had taken, hers was undoubtedly the first.
"Did I... bring up an unpleasant topic?"
"Not at all. Rather, I am the one who..."
A sudden lump rose in my throat.
I felt profoundly apologetic that I could do so little to help Serin, who currently endured the living embodiment of every miserable misfortune imaginable. Words I had no right to utter pressed against the back of my teeth.
"In any case, please pay it no mind, Serin. More importantly, how do you find the performance?"
"It feels so foreign, but it's really fun."
Every single clown wore an elaborate mask, demonstrating marvelous feats. There was mesmerizing juggling, bodily contortions that defied human anatomy, and even a performer thrusting his entire head into the gaping maw of a live alligator. It was a spectacular display well worthy of the crowd's roaring cheers.
"Since you're wearing a mask too, Rian, you wouldn't look out of place at all if you barged in right now."
"I possess no such talents. I would be driven out immediately."
"Please, with that face, you wouldn't need talent... No, wait, that's not what I meant. Hey, Rian."
"Yes, what is it?"
"Don't you think we've gotten pretty close by now? Wouldn't you say so?"
"Truly?"
My heart gave a sudden, unexpected leap at the astonishing revelation. So this is what it feels like to be close with someone. Having never had a friend my own age, I was honestly thrilled.
"If you question it like that, what does that make me—?!"
"Let us be friends. Forever."
I answered immediately out of sheer, overwhelming sentiment, yet Serin seemed distinctly dissatisfied with the terms.
"Forever is a bit much... You never know what the future holds."
"Is it insufficient?"
"Huh? What is?"
"Is a Silver Token not enough... as a Friendship Fee?"
I had heard that people of high standing offered tribute to one another as a pledge of amicable relations. As an imperial princess, Serin would surely be no different in that regard. Yet what more could I possibly provide her here?
As my thoughts spiraled into deeper turmoil, Serin clamped both of her hands tightly around mine.
"Where on earth did you pick up such nonsense?! Why are you bringing up a friendship fee out of nowhere?! What do you take me for, some neighborhood delinquent extorting protection money?!"
Are Serin's imperial parents also considered neighborhood delinquents, then?
"Good grief! I've never even thought of charging a friendship fee, let alone taken one from anyone!"
She has never even received friendship fees before...?
It was definitive, crushing proof of her utter isolation within the Imperial Palace. I resolved right then and there that, for whatever remained of our journey, I would grant whatever Serin asked of me.
"Instead of shady tribute like that, there's just one thing... just one single thing you could do that would make me insanely happy."
"I am listening."
I should never have committed myself so rashly.
Scarcely ten seconds had passed since I forged that resolute, manly vow, yet the request Serin made instantly threatened to brand me a liar.
"When it's just the two of us, could you take off your mask just once?"
"I cannot."
Denied with such crisp, merciless finality in the middle of a flowing conversation, the light momentarily vanished from Serin's eyes. But she recovered quickly, clinging to my arm with frantic desperation.
"Five seconds is plenty! No, three seconds! If that's too much, even one second is fine!"
"I apologize. It is not an item that can be removed lightly..."
Whenever Roderick caught sight of my unmasked face, he would grumble incessantly, warning that if I ever wandered the streets barefaced, I would end up stabbed to death on the spot. At the very least, he claimed, the pavement around me would become littered with clumps of torn-out hair from violent brawls.
While the exact mechanism behind such a catastrophic outcome remained entirely mysterious to me, I could not risk dragging Serin into such danger.
"Ugh, you make a person so curious, it's criminal... Doesn't it bother you having to lift the edge of your mask just to shove food into your mouth every time you eat?"
"I have grown accustomed to it."
"Urghhh..."
Serin stared up at the vast blue sky, looking as though she were swallowing down an immense surge of frustration. From that moment onward, the mid-day street performers were undoubtedly the last thing on her mind. Meanwhile, I had to keep my senses razor-sharp, lest Serin attempt a sudden ambush to strip off my mask.
Today was a textbook illustration of reaping what one sowed.
If only I hadn't wasted precious time lingering over those street performers, we could have secured food and lodging in a proper inn by now.
It would have felt far less excruciating if he had thrown a complaint my way, but Rian didn't show the slightest hint of discomfort.
It sounded ridiculous even to my own ears, but somehow, I felt like I was being pitied...
More crucial than that, however, was the undeniable reality that Rian's identity aligned almost perfectly with the Male Lead.
Barring some malevolent, one-in-a-million statistical anomaly, I had long since pegged him as the Male Lead of this world.
His unfailingly polite manner of speech paired with that utterly bizarre, fourth-dimensional mindset is practically definitive proof.
All that remained was to pry off that mask and confirm it, yet that very step proved to be the most insurmountable hurdle. It wasn't merely suspicion driving me; I simply wanted to feast my eyes upon an appearance described as bordering on divine adoration.
There were more than a couple of things that gave me pause today, too...
According to my Male Lead radar, Rian was unmistakably the one. The way he absorbed every unreasonable complaint with the boundless tolerance of an open sky—was that not the quintessential mindset of a true protagonist? Learning that he had once held the hand of some ruined noble lady sent a sharp pang through my chest, though.
And set that aside—a 'friendship fee'?! What on earth was that about?! Damn it, why does he have to be so ridiculously cute?!
The image of him earnestly fretting over whether his token was enough to cover a friendship fee made my hands itch to pinch his cheeks.
After squatting on the dirt ground and daydreaming for the better part of an hour, I pushed myself up and trotted over to Rian's side.
"Hey, Rian."
"Yes, Serin?"
"About earlier this afternoon... I think I let our newfound closeness get ahead of myself, so I've been reflecting on it."
"You have done nothing wrong, Serin."
Wow, sweet. Dangerously sweet. The tone of his voice was sweet, and his gentle, considerate posture was sweeter still. He truly was my ultimate bias. Whenever I talked to him, my vocabulary seemed to undergo a steep, alarming decline.
Reigning in the fangirl squealing inside my head, I pitched him a serious proposition.
"Ahem. So, here's the thing. How about we make a deal? I'll show you a few amazing tricks, and in exchange, you show me your face just once. Deal?"
"I am exceedingly curious, but I must decline."
"I'll sweeten the pot! I'll teach you an incredibly effective exercise routine. I'll even give you one-on-one personal training! Come on, reconsider. Pretty please, Rian?"
Talk about a bargain!
I was willing to lay out everything—from a full nine-hundred-degree hook kick to modern strength-training gym regimens!
"..."
Rian remained silent. Man, this guy is tough to crack. Little did he know I had practically ignited a fitness revolution inside the Imperial Palace by introducing modern workout regimens.
"Haah, my mistake. With stuff like this, you have to let the client try a free sample first, right?"
"That... does sound reasonable."
His voice sounded faintly skeptical, but I was someone who had already shattered such doubts right in the heart of the imperial capital.
"Alright. Then step closer and watch carefully, okay? Don't worry, I won't turn into a glowing dinosaur or anything."
"...? I shall watch with great anticipation."
Tugging Rian closer by the sleeve, I offered him a prime, front-row view. Taekwondo was my trump card, so starting off with standard fitness basics seemed like the safest approach.
"Okay, feet shoulder-width apart, toes pointed slightly outward. Now, from here, you sit down and stand back up..."
Squats—the alpha and omega of lower-body training. Naturally, for him, it would probably seem like child's play.
In this world, physical limits were set absurdly high. Bodyweight exercises alone barely posed a challenge; one usually had to rely on enchanted weights just to stimulate the muscles properly.
Still, once he feels the burn in the right places, he'll realize what an amazing exercise this is!
I cleanly demonstrated four repetitions. Now it was time to critique Rian's form, but first, I wanted his initial review.
"Heheh, how was that? Looks simple, doesn't it? But surprisingly... Rian?"
Having focused entirely on my posture during the demonstration, I had looked away for a brief moment. When I turned back, I froze. Rian was clutching his palm over the eyeholes of his mask, his head bowed low in utter mortification.
"Rian? Did you even watch?"
"Vulgar..."
"What?"
"I find it... deeply vulgar. How could a proper lady spread her legs in such a manner... as if, as if relieving herself in the open... Ugh."
"Are you out of your mind?!"
In that instant, my vision flickered and completely whited out. A high-pitched ringing roared in my ears, sharp enough to rival the trauma of a high-speed collision. My senses scattered, and the entire world spun on its axis.
Vulgar. Spread. Relieving herself.
Those were the three fatal keywords delivered in a single breath by my ultimate bias.
No. This was impossible. This had to be a dream. Yes, surely we were all just sharing a vivid, airborne delusion.
...My retreat from reality lasted all of two seconds.
Gritting my teeth until they creaked, I released a silent, bloodcurdling shriek from the depths of my soul.
AAAAAAAGGGHHH!
To me, squats had just become murder.
In the most spiritual sense possible.