Somewhat Peculiar, and Deeply Pitiful (1)
The mercenary band's headquarters, to which Serin had been brought after her kidnapping, was located in a small town bordering the frontier. Procuring supplies for the journey was simple enough. If there was any problem at all, it was the unsightly grimace plastered across Roderick's face just as we finished our preparations to depart.
"Haaah, my naive boy. You won't end up getting eaten alive by that crafty little Impe—er, lady, will you?"
It was a ridiculous worry; it wasn't as if she were some vicious monster. Thus, I lightly brushed aside his incomprehensible theatrics and set off on our journey, riding side by side with Serin.
By the time we left the small town behind and entered a quiet forest path, the only sounds asserting their presence were the chirping of birds and the rhythmic clopping of hooves against the dirt road.
It was a taste of freedom I had not savored in a long time. The shadows of summer trees swaying in the breeze offered a pleasant coolness, tempting me to quietly close my eyes.
Yet while I was casually enjoying the ride, Serin's gaze flickered toward me every now and then. Her lips parted and closed three or four times in apparent contemplation, which puzzled me. My parents, who had grown up in the Imperial Palace, always spoke their minds even after their fall from grace. It seemed I had already discovered a difference between them and Serin.
Ah, could it be that?
Shortly after I first met Roderick, he had taught me that for ordinary people, silence implied awkwardness. Keeping one's mouth shut at all times, as I did, was far from the norm. Resolving such an atmosphere was supposedly simpler than one might think.
"The weather is quite pleasant today."
Had he not told me that with a face like mine, simply repeating that line would keep any conversation flowing?
"Ah... yes. It’s very refreshing."
Yet after offering that brief reply, Serin snapped her mouth shut. Given how smoothly things had gone when I asked for her name, I had expected a natural conversation, but what could have prompted this sudden shift?
"Hmm... No way... Could it be real? Mmm, hrmmm."
Fragments of muttered words carried on the breeze drifted into my ears.
With Roderick’s conversational advice falling flat and Serin showing no particular eagerness to reach out, our midday journey drew to a close in silence.
The shift occurred that evening, as firewood crackled and gave off gentle plumes of smoke in our campfire.
With the next village still some distance away, we were forced to camp out in the open. As I quietly tipped ingredients into a cooking pot, she approached me with hesitant, cautious steps.
"Um, Rian."
"Yes, please speak, Serin."
"There's something I’m reeeally curious about and wanted to ask... Would it be a bother?"
"Not in the slightest."
Receiving my permission, Serin let out a relieved breath and spoke.
"What exactly do you do, Rian?"
"I..."
I tried to formulate an answer, only to find myself tongue-tied. When I actually thought about it, I had no clear idea what kind of person I was either. During my childhood, Roderick made most of the decisions for me, and nowadays, subordinates handled the vast majority of tasks. Lately, instances where I stepped in personally were exceedingly rare.
A wave of self-reproach washed over me.
"...Truthfully, I may very well be an utterly useless person."
"W-Wait, out of nowhere?!"
"It has just dawned on me. Nothing about me has changed since I was a child."
The full moon perched high in the evening sky seemed to encourage my introspection. Furthermore, the twilight navy sky and the forest path tinted amber by the campfire stirred a strange melancholy within me.
"That's not true at all! I mean, you’re making dinner like this right now, and... above all, you saved me. I truly am grateful."
Her final expression of gratitude twisted the knife in my conscience once more. What kind of face would she make if she knew that I was the root cause of the incident?
"...Rather, I am sorry. For putting you through such an ordeal."
"You saved me, and that's enough. Just how shameless do you think I am?"
The most shameless person here was me, but I resolved to bury that truth in my chest for now.
"If you really feel indebted... please allow me just a few more questions."
"Ask as many as you wish."
"Look, I know this is a really weird question. But you can't laugh or make fun of me after hearing it, okay?"
"I shall comply."
Even after I agreed, Serin struggled to part her lips. She only spoke once an ember popped in the fire, right as the surrounding crickets fell silent as though curious about her inquiry.
"Ahem! By any chance... could there possibly, perchance, be some kind of feeling that struck you when you saw me? Like, an impression? Or an emotion?"
"An impression and an emotion?"
"Yeaaah..."
An ideological screening?
One's impression of an imperial princess was directly tied to the dignity of the imperial family. Roderick had once warned me that people in power would seize upon even the slightest slip of the tongue. In that case, the correct answer I had to give was clear.
"You are beautiful, Serin."
"What?"
"From your neatly combed black hair, to your eyes that resemble a dawn sky dusted with faint stars."
"Wait, no, hold on—"
"To your distinct features and your skin, as pure and clear as a pristine stream. You are without flaw."
"Urk."
I wondered what she felt behind that slight grimace. With the blazing campfire painting her skin amber, it was difficult to discern her true complexion.
"What I meant was completely different from that... But wait. Do you really, well..."
Serin hesitated for a moment before demanding in an accusatory tone.
"Are you sure you have a complex about your looks? How can a person talk like such a smooth-talking gigolo...?! I mean, isn't that, like, something people with low confidence usually can't pull off...?!"
"The person who requested my impression was you, Serin."
"I mean, that's... true, but..."
Unable to counter my point, Serin hung her head. Staring parallel to the ground, her lips mumbled softly.
"Weird... Everything feels like he's definitely the male lead. But it's not like I can just ask him outright."
"What is a 'male lead', Serin?"
"Ack!"
The moment I spoke, Serin jumped right out of her skin.
"Don't tell me I just said that out loud?!"
"You did."
"Aha, ahaha... Well, that's, um, liquor! It's the name of a drink—Namju!"
"You must be fond of alcohol."
"Oh, I love it! Chugging straight soju from a green bottle right here while stargazing would be absolute perfection..."
Though the meaning of her exact words remained obscure, the fact that Serin was quite fond of drinking came across loud and clear. She was likely longing for some secret, renowned vintage found only within the Imperial Palace.
"And it smells so delicious out here, too."
"The stew happens to be ready. Allow me to serve you a bowl."
I offered her a brass bowl filled to the brim with stew. Serin accepted it gladly, her face alight with anticipation. Scooping up a spoonful and tasting it, her eyes widened.
"Whoa, this is delicious!"
"It is simple, yet respectable fare."
In truth, meat stews all tasted roughly the same. Even so, the ambiance and mood lent a flavor that was hard to dismiss.
"I'm so sick of eating nothing but rich, greasy food all the time, so having something this savory and light is amazing..."
Serin evidently did not realize that ordinary households could never afford to serve greasy meat until one grew tired of it. In that regard, she was remarkably innocent. An unpretentious woman who hummed with delight over a mere pot of simple stew.
"Sometimes I just don't get it, you know? How just grilling pork neck until it's golden-brown can taste better than most dishes in the entire world."
"The same applies to fish. Simply sprinkling salt over it and grilling it makes for a delicious meal."
"Then, Rian, have you ever filleted a fish and eaten it raw?"
"I apologize, but that sounds rather barbaric."
"Whoa, that is pure prejudice! Sashimi is such an incredible delicacy..."
"If I'd known this would happen, I should've attended a culinary academy or something."
It seems an academy dedicated to teaching culinary arts has opened in the Capital.
Every single word that left her mouth felt fresh and novel. Traveling with the princess had truly been the right choice; when else would I have the chance to learn about the high-society culture my parents had once inhabited?
Once we finished our meal, I gathered the soiled bowls and headed toward the nearby stream to wash them. To my surprise, Serin naturally trailed behind me to divide the chores.
Is she using this opportunity to experience menial labor?
My absurd speculation didn't last long.
I could only watch in astonishment as she vigorously and deftly wiped down the rinsed tableware with a rag.
"...Why are you so adept at this?"
"Huh? At what?"
"No, it is nothing."
"Good grief... We've only spent a single day together, but it's crystal clear just how eccentric you are, Rian."
I would like to hand you a mirror, Serin.
My assessment of her shifted. Serin was an eccentric person far beyond anything I could have ever imagined.
By the time the moon had climbed high and the washing was complete, she stretched her arms and gazed up at the night sky.
"Hwaaah, sitting on horseback all day and then bending over like this has made my whole body ache. Are you totally fine, Rian?"
"Yes. I feel no discomfort."
"Phew... Normally around this time... Um, Rian. Sorry to ask, but what day of the week is it today?"
"It is Friday."
"It was supposed to be leg-destroying day... And to think I've had to skip it for nine whole days."
Destroy... what?
She had muttered it under her breath, but unfortunately for her, my hearing was exceptionally sharp.
Thus, I found myself struck dumb by this appalling reality. It felt as though I had just caught a glimpse of the Imperial Palace's darkest shadows slipping through her lips.
Could it be... that Serin, an imperial princess, is subject to periodic abuse?
The degraded act of consuming raw fish.
Her lower body being brutally destroyed every Friday.
Her eerie proficiency at washing dishes.
Every piece of evidence pointed unmistakably to one conclusion: the princess was being terribly mistreated within the palace walls.
At that moment, I began to reconsider whether returning Serin to the Imperial Palace was truly the right course of action. Perhaps her happiness lay somewhere far beyond the gilded cages of royalty.
Yet it would be impossible to hide Serin, an imperial princess, forever.
I knew all too well how wretched it was to be alone in the world. The sheer helplessness I had felt when I fled the Capital after losing my parents bordered on utter despair. Had Roderick not tried to kidnap me back then, I would likely still be wandering aimlessly to this day.
Confronted with such a grim reality, there was only one thing I could do.
"...Serin."
"Yes? Rian."
Drawing an ornament from inside my robes, I offered it to her, speaking as casually as I could muster.
"Please... accept this. Sniff..."
"Rian? What's wrong? You look like you're about to cry..."
"N-No. Not at all. It is nothing of the sort."
I stuttered like a fool. In that single moment, I was genuinely thankful that my mask concealed my face.
"What is this? It kind of looks like an identification token..."
"It is a token granting you my unconditional assistance whenever you wish, just once."
"Why would you give something so precious to me? Wait, besides, what kind of help would I ever need from you..."
"It is fine. Please, keep it safe. I beg of you."
"Ah... um, well, okay for now. Thank you, I'll cherish it."
"You must do so."
"Right..."
Serin wore a baffled, hesitant expression. Yet even her unease surely stemmed from a gentle nature that failed to recognize the abuse inflicted upon her.
I resolved, deep within a corner of my heart, that I would at least grant Serin a taste of true liberation during this journey.