The Dawn of the Soap Era
"Test their loyalty?"
"Water buffaloes die easily, just as you said, Father. And it'll take a long time before we can properly raise them."
"Mm, true enough."
Choi U nodded, gently stroking his chin beard at my words.
"So, distribute the water buffaloes to the southern Ho clans and have them raise them. If they're truly loyal to you and not just chasing their own clan's gain, won't they manage it? Once we get them breeding, these buffaloes won't just provide horn material for our black-lacquered bows—they'll give us meat and help with farming too. How could that not be a win?"
Raising water buffaloes in Goryeo is tough as hell. Sure, once we nail breeding and build up the know-how, it'll be easy, but the start will be brutal. So, let's dump the task on the Ho clans.
Have the southern Ho clans raise them. Test if they're really loyal to the Choi clan. In the process, it'll drain their wealth too. And if we make the buffaloes state property instead of personal assets, even if they raise them with blood and sweat, they'll go to the peasants. Then, we introduce double-plowing methods.
"So, as long as they raise them, it's a gain for Goryeo."
"Exactly. And we confirm the Ho clans' loyalty too. Isn't this one buffalo bringing massive national benefits?"
"Indeed. Quite so. Heh heh heh. No matter what, it's a win for our clan and Goryeo. Yeon, you'll ensure the Choi clan's glory for a thousand years! But."
"Is there a problem?"
"Before that. To pull off something this big, Goryeo celadon or mother-of-pearl inlay won't cut it. Got a way? Even if it's for the state, the royal family's watching."
Hm, yeah. Money problems, as expected. But I've got a solution. Make soap. The classic in alternate histories. Soap from this era.
Sell to nobles first, scale up, then export to Song.
"A while back, I dreamed of climbing a mountain with Chunsim. But this time, the mountain spirit was washing its body with some strange stuff, making its hair all clean."
"What was it?"
"The spirit called it soap. I was jealous seeing how clean it got, so I asked, and it taught me how to make it."
I'd conjured up a mountain spirit that doesn't exist. Really, I just imagined that old man, but whatever. Now the mountain spirit's this weirdo who spills soap recipes mid-bath.
Even Father tilted his head at my tale.
"What mountain spirit does that?"
"Well, don't spirits like us Goryeo folk enjoy a good wash too?"
I slyly averted my eyes from his.
"Mm, fine. Directing people is slave work anyway, so that's doable. But the materials?"
"Pig or cow fat, ash, and quicklime."
The process isn't hard. Way easier than niter beds.
"Handle that too. Use the slaves as you like."
"Yes, Father. I'll make sure it benefits the clan."
This is a test too. A man like Choi U wouldn't flinch at the royal gaze. He just wants to probe me more.
"It was a hassle procuring them."
Getting the water buffaloes wasn't hard. That Song merchant must run a big operation—wide reach, even importing southern barbarians via Song ports. We got nearly a hundred pairs.
Then Choi U went to the emperor and explained.
"Choe Sangguk. Bringing in water buffaloes from the south—aren't you wasting the national treasury?"
As expected, the emperor griped. The Inspectorate's budget ties into the royal purse, after all. The military regime's a pack of traitors stealing all royal rights. The powerless emperor could only grumble verbally—no real rebellion in him.
"Your Majesty, buffalo horns are vital for our Goryeo bows, and buffalo farming is far more advanced than our current methods."
"But distributing them to the Ho clans instead of the royal house?"
He suggested raising them in Gaegyeong, but that was shot down. The damage in the capital?
"We give them to the Ho clans because buffaloes struggle in the cold—they need warmer regions. If they're loyal to Goryeo, why wouldn't they raise them?"
"Loyal to Goryeo? Or just the Choi clan? That's my worry."
Powerless Gojong could only spit complaints.
"Your Majesty, how can you doubt my loyalty? The U-bong Choi clan and my retainers will guard your dragon robe."
Choi U followed my script perfectly. Perks of being the dictator's kid with full backing.
If we pull this off, huge gains.
"Dispatch agricultural officials to aid buffalo breeding from the Ho clans. Local officials, follow the Inspectorate's policy."
With reform sails raised, the Choi clan had no retreat. To push reforms, Choi U needed civil officials badly. Swords alone don't reform nations.
He set up the western bureau four years early, recruiting scholars without hesitation.
"Over the next five years, drag this country back to King Hyeonjong's era somehow. Civil officials, help me reform this land."
"""Yes, my lord."""
Now, how did the Ho clans react? They sighed at their shares, wondering how to raise the beasts. Even if they did, they couldn't keep them. Refuse? The Inspectorate wasn't threatening their rights outright, and as vassals, they had to obey.
The Two Armies and Six Guards began rebuilding too, with elite Byeolchodo-ryeong from the Byeolcho Army personally training the nominal recruits into real soldiers.
Good news for me amid it all.
"Miss. That book you wrote."
"Love and War?"
I wrote it to teach my little brothers: screw up with women, and you're fucked. Now it's trending in Gaegyeong. I only did one volume, but Chunsim had copies made. They spread to noble daughters visiting the Choi estate.
"Oh my, such brilliant writing."
"Who wrote this? The lord's daughter?"
Women of any era love romance. Goryeo noble girls hit with modern-style novels sent gifts. Fan mail from this era?
Not that thrilling, honestly. Folks seemed refreshed by this softer side of the Choi clan.
"Miss, no new stories?"
"Don't beg like that. Makes my stomach turn, Chunsim."
Feels like when I fox around Father. How'd my maid get so cheeky? Normally, I'd scold her, but with no real friends in this world, we hang loose despite master-servant ties.
Or rather, who befriends the lord's daughter when everyone's just worshipping?
"Don't be like that. Other house maids envy me."
"My fate's cursed. Stuck with you."
Rich-house maid perks? Slave acting all high and mighty. They gossip about whose master's best.
"But Miss, should I, your maid, really handle this?"
"Hm."
Chunsim's developing soap—real-time. Her whining earlier? Over doing it solo.
"Shouldn't we get help? For me, it's..."
"Chunsim."
"Yes, Miss."
"Too chatty. Just do it."
Her job: pour lye over melted animal fat, stir with a wooden spatula. Repeat till sticky—saponification's underway. How furiously did she stir in rage at me? Finally, it thickened.
Sprinkle lotus petals for scent. Pour into molds. Harden 2-4 weeks, monitor, slice, test.
We mixed fat-to-lye 2:1. No scales in Goryeo, so trial-and-error on concentrations. A few fails, but it worked. Slaves iterated to perfect it.
"Miss, can we use this?"
"Go wild. Tell me if it irritates your skin."
Clinical trials on slaves first. My body's precious.
Chunsim's muscles? Not my problem.
After tweaks, new batch with spices from Song, southern barbarians, and Arabs. Slaves said only first tries irritated; later ones were fine.
"Whoa, it actually works. Insane."
I grinned down at the soap. Pulling off novel stuff for real? Wild.
Gave slaves the first batches as gifts—no complaints. They went from confused to thrilled at the effects. Animal fats are cheap but rough on skin, so low-end for commoners. Use vegetable oils for premium.
Goryeo's Buddhism cut animal fats anyway, boosting plant oils—perfect.
Money? Sell high, duh. Choi clan can do anything. Spices and flowers make it fancy.
Noble culture booming, so I called noble daughters, handed out soap.
Not use it? The lord's daughter's gift? They can't refuse. One word from me, and they're fish food. What can they do?
"O-ohhh. How is this possible?"
"The lord's miss made this?"
"Their slaves use it casually!"
Months later, noble girls were hooked. Hygiene proved it, spreading house-wide fast.
U-bong Choi premium scented soap! Hit the palace; royal ladies loved it. Soap boomed, slaves worked overtime.
Foreign merchants sniffed it out, came begging.
"Miss, not celadon—soap!"
The Song merchant bowed low, pleading.
Time for fun.
"What about mother-of-pearl inlay?"
"Song has that! Please!"
"Implying our Goryeo inlay's inferior? Trash it?"
That stings, depending on hearing.
"N-not at all!"
The buffalo-hauling Song guy begged for soap. He smelled profit for sure.