After Drawing the Future
After drawing the future, Rion fell fast asleep right where she sat on the ground, as if completely exhausted from the aftermath of using her ability. Yoon Siwoo looked a bit flustered at the sight, but he soon hoisted the sleeping Rion onto his back and left the zoo with me. Just as we were about to slip away after tucking Rion into her bed at the orphanage, she grabbed my hand in her sleep—or perhaps she was talking in her sleep—and muttered in a tiny voice.
"Big sister, let's go to the zoo together again next time..."
Because I couldn't bring myself to make a promise I might never keep, even as a comforting lie, I remained silent and turned my back. I'm sorry, but I don't think there will be a next time for me, I whispered to myself as we walked away.
On the way back home, Yoon Siwoo shared his thoughts about how the day had gone.
"Today was ■eally fun■. Scarlet, thanks to ■ou, I think I had a ■onderful day off."
I nodded at Yoon Siwoo, who was smiling as if he had truly enjoyed himself. He gave a shy, sheepish grin and continued.
"Hey, if it's ■kay, let's go somewhere ■ogether again ■ext time. If there's anywhere you ■ant to go, just ■ell me anytime."
Yoon Siwoo was saying something. But because of the noise ringing in my head, I couldn't quite make out his words. Hoping he would stop talking to me for a moment, I slightly averted my gaze.
At that, Yoon Siwoo muttered, looking a bit dejected.
"Ah... I didn't mean to ■ressure you... Just, if there's somewhere you ■ant to go..."
...I couldn't understand what he was saying. Right now, I just wanted to escape this place.
"I'm sorry, I'm a bit tired. I'll go to my room first..."
Since we had just arrived home, I told him that, went straight into my room, and shut the door.
Immediately after, I collapsed onto the bed and covered my ears. But even so, the noise echoing inside my head didn't fade at all.
An alarm was ringing.
Ding-ding-ding~ Good morning~ Ding-ding-ding~
It was an alarm sound I had grown all too familiar with. A sound that played whenever I was struggling—proof that I was deeply exhausted and worn down. I couldn't remember when it started, but at some point, this alarm had begun to ring endlessly in my mind.
To be honest, it wasn't as if I wasn't stressed by the reality crashing down on me. But even so, because I had steeled myself, I could bear it. A little stress manifesting as an auditory hallucination of an alarm was nothing.
No, in fact, I preferred the alarm to keep ringing. Because as long as that alarm kept playing...
Pa-pa-■ ■-pa pa-■-pa■ Good ■orning~
...it meant I was still myself.
But amidst that alarm...
■-pa■ pa■ pa-■-pa■ ■■-ning~
...another sound kept...
■■■ ■■ ■■■■ ■■■■■~
...another sound kept intruding. How foolish. No matter how much I denied it, nothing would change.
A voice. It was cutting in.
Thud.
Just as I always did whenever the voice started speaking, I clenched my fist and struck my head hard. Usually, doing this would at least show some sign of quietening the voice, even if only a little.
Even if you look away, what cannot be changed remains unchanged.
Today, it didn't show even the slightest sign of fading. Still, I didn't want to hear it. I struck my head, struck it, and struck it again. And as I kept hitting myself...
"You saw it, didn't you? Your own future."
My face contorted at the voice. Yes, I saw it. I ended up seeing it. Today, I saw my future.
With trembling hands, I opened the shopping bag containing the plushie Yoon Siwoo had gifted me. Inside the bag was the cat plushie, along with Rion's drawing, which I had secretly slipped inside earlier without Siwoo noticing. Closing my eyes tightly, I pulled out the drawing and slowly opened them. Once again, I forced myself to look at the horrific future depicted on the paper.
"No matter what anyone says, that is what you are."
The only reason I had been able to endure until now was because I believed my existence was having some sort of positive impact on this world. Seeing people who should have died in the original story survive. Watching Yoon Siwoo grow strong much faster than he did in the original. If my presence could make the ending of this world even slightly better... If my efforts could be of some help to the precious people and friends I had made...
With that single-minded determination, I had strived. I had endured. Even if a day came when things became irreversible and I had to lose my life to Yoon Siwoo, I had encouraged myself, telling myself that such an outcome would be perfectly fine.
But in the drawing of the future that Rion had sketched after looking at Siwoo and me, there was a red-haired girl standing with a sword plunged deep into her chest amidst a sea of raging flames, and at her feet lay a collapsed, white-haired boy.
Yoon Siwoo dies. Because of me. In the future, I will murder the hope of this world with my own hands.
My head spun. Nausea welled up in my throat. I had thought I might be able to change the doomed ending of this world. But the future depicted in the drawing seemed to mock me, declaring that far from helping, my very existence would only bring about that destruction. Feeling as though the entire purpose of my existence was being utterly denied, I shook my head and choked out a denial.
"No..."
"Oh, but it is. You will kill him. The one you hold most dear will die because of you."
But the voice dug deep into my mind, carving itself into my thoughts. Desperate to deny it, I covered my ears and cried out.
"No...!"
"That is what it means to be born a Witch. Because you are such a creature, you will be betrayed, shunned, and ultimately killed by those you trusted."
No, it's not, I shook my head. Thrashing against the relentless voice, I slammed my head against the wall over and over again. My forehead split open and blood trickled down, staining my white dress crimson. Yet, even as the body of the cursed girl reflected in the mirror stained red, red, and redder still, as if to mock my futile struggle and prove nothing could be changed, the wounds on the girl's body in the mirror healed, healed, and healed again.
"So, before that happens, burn it all down. Pour all your sorrow, your resentment, and your rage... and burn this cursed world to ashes."
"NOOOOOOO!!!!!!"
With a scream, the mirror reflecting the cursed girl was hurled across the room and shattered into a thousand pieces. With a loud crash, sharp shards of glass scattered in every direction. Reflected in the countless shards, the image of the crimson girl painted the room red, as if the entire space were engulfed in flames. As if to show me the very future I was destined to create.
At that sight, I collapsed to the floor, sobbing hysterically as I muttered.
No, I won't let that happen. I won't become that... If that's how it's going to end, then I'd rather... I'd rather...
I picked up a long, sharp shard of the broken mirror from the floor. Gripping it tightly with both hands, I aimed it at my chest. Regrets, lingering attachments, unkept promises—there was still so much left behind, but I simply could not bear the future that lay ahead. I drove the shard down with all my might.
But it never pierced my heart.
Looking up past my frozen arms, I saw Yoon Siwoo, his face twisted in anguish, gripping my wrists. For a split second, panic flared—Ah, I've been caught. But as I looked into his eyes, the scene from the drawing flashed in my mind, and my breathing grew ragged.
No, absolutely not that...
Muttering inwardly, I tried to force the shard down again, but my arms, locked in Yoon Siwoo's grasp, wouldn't budge an inch. Still holding my arms, Yoon Siwoo whispered, his face filled with utter disbelief.
"......Why, why are you ■oing this, Sc■rlet?"
"......Please, don't stop me."
Of all people, please don't be the one to stop me. This is all for you.
I cried out in my heart, my face crumpling, but Yoon Siwoo's grip remained unyielding. Yet, in stark contrast to his steady hands, his voice trembled violently as he questioned me.
"......Tell me the ■eason, the reason. There must be a ■eason for this, ■sn't there?"
At his question, I hesitated for a moment before answering.
"......The drawing, on the bed."
It would be better to tell him the truth. With that thought, I confessed the existence of the drawing to him. Yoon Siwoo gently but firmly pried the mirror shard from my hands, then reached over to the bed and picked up Rion's drawing. As he scanned the paper, I saw his eyes tremble. Even if no one else could, Yoon Siwoo was bound to recognize that the figures in the drawing were him and me.
"......What kind of ■rawing is this?"
"Rion... Rion drew it......"
I spoke softly, but seeing that he needed more explanation, I quietly confessed.
"...Rion can see the future. She drew that today after looking at you and me. Do you understand what it means...?"
The trembling in Yoon Siwoo's eyes deepened. I would end up killing him. That future must have been incredibly difficult for him to accept as well. Driven by the desperate need to prevent that outcome at all costs, I pleaded with Yoon Siwoo, who still refused to let go of my arms.
"Because of me... you're going to die because of me. I absolutely, desperately hate that... So please, let go of my hands... It's better for me to die before that happens......"
"......Sc■rlet."
"......Or would you rather do it yourself? You remember the promise we made back then, right?"
Kill me.
At my words, Yoon Siwoo gasped sharply. I could see a tempest of confusion, sorrow, anger, and countless other emotions swirling in his eyes. I could feel his ragged, heavy breaths.
"......Whew."
Then, Yoon Siwoo quietly drew a sword from thin air. It was a dagger emitting a pure white light—the Holy Sword of Truth. The brilliantly glowing tip of the blade slowly drew closer to me. At that sight, I thought, Ah, he's going to do it. And I slowly closed my eyes.
A moment later, with a soft snip...
"I'm just going to take a little bit."
Yoon Siwoo's voice rang out clearly from right in front of me. Opening my eyes, I saw him holding a few strands of what looked like red thread. From the sensation I had just felt, I realized it was my hair.
"......You told me before, didn't you? That you trust me more than anyone else in the world."
Yoon Siwoo tied the strands of hair around the hilt of the Holy Sword of Truth, then looked at me and asked.
"Was that a lie?"
"......It wasn't a lie."
"Am I really that untrustworthy to you?"
"......No, you're not."
"Then why?"
His voice carried a trace of anger.
"Why do you trust a stupid piece of paper more than you trust me?"
I was taken aback by his words, but without giving me a moment to process, Yoon Siwoo glared at me with eyes full of burning fury.
"I am strong. Probably much stronger than you think. But if you're still anxious, I'll get even stronger. Strong enough to fight a Witch and win."
As if to drive the point home, he gripped my shoulders firmly and growled in a low voice.
"So, there is absolutely no way I will ever die by your hand. Ever. So don't pay any mind to a garbage drawing like that. Do you understand?"
"But......"
"Scarlet."
Yoon Siwoo spoke to me with a gaze that was furious, yet profoundly sorrowful.
"......If you don't want to die, just say you don't want to die."
At his words, a silent sigh escaped my lips. Ah. He saw right through me.
"If it's so hard that you feel like dying, say it's hard. If you're worried and scared, don't ask me to kill you—just be honest and tell me you're worried, that you're scared!"
Yoon Siwoo looked down at me as I silently hung my head, gesturing to the hair tied to the sword's hilt.
"See this? With this, I'll know the exact moment you're in trouble. If you're ever in danger, no matter where I am or what I'm doing, I will run to you instantly."
Before I knew it, tears welled up and spilled over. And as if telling me not to cry, Yoon Siwoo pulled me into a gentle yet firm embrace, whispering softly into my ear.
"So Scarlet, stop thinking such dark thoughts and only focus on how to be happy. If anything bad happens, I'll take care of it somehow. You know I keep my word. Trust me. Okay?"
"......"
To my silent self, Yoon Siwoo whispered.
"Tell me you trust me."
Hearing his voice, which resonated far closer and clearer than the dark whispers echoing in my head... I felt a sudden conviction that this boy really would make everything alright. Clinging to that hope and desire, I answered.
"......Yes, I trust you."
At that, Yoon Siwoo gently patted my back as if praising me. Feeling my anxiety and worries melt away slightly under his touch, I drifted into a deep, peaceful sleep.