The Weight of Trust
I dragged my feet on the long walk home. The refreshed energy I’d felt after finally getting some decent sleep had vanished entirely, leaving my footsteps heavy and leaden. Passing by a building, I caught my reflection in a glass window. My expression was so fraught with anxiety that anyone looking at me would have known I was carrying a heavy burden. A sigh escaped my lips before I could stop it.
I couldn't go home looking like this. Yoon Siwoo would be waiting. He already carried far too much on his shoulders without me adding to his troubles. I was already wracked with guilt over practically forcing my way into his house to live with him; the last thing I wanted was to worry him any further. I vigorously rubbed my stiff cheeks with my palms, trying to force my face to relax. My face, thoroughly squished and massaged by my hands, didn't exactly look cheerful, but it was a vast improvement over the grim mask from a moment ago.
This should be enough to hide it.
Praying that it was, I made my way back to the house.
"I'm home."
"Ah, Scarlet! Welcome back. How was your walk?"
"...Yeah, it was fine. Nothing special."
The moment I opened the door, Yoon Siwoo sprang up from the living room sofa to greet me, almost as if he’d been waiting right there the entire time. Come to think of it, he had been sitting in that exact same spot, in that exact same posture, before I left... Feeling a bit flustered, I offered a casual reply, only to watch his expression suddenly stiffen.
His reaction told me everything: I had failed to control my thoughts properly. It was my mistake. When dealing with Yoon Siwoo, I had to guard my mind with absolute, unwavering focus.
"...Did something happen out there?"
"...Just a minor thing. It's really nothing you need to worry about, so let's just have dinner. You were waiting for me, weren't you?"
I glossed over the issue and quickly changed the subject. Yoon Siwoo still looked troubled, but thankfully, he let it slide without pressing further. I whipped up a quick dinner, and as we sat facing each other at the table, a sudden realization struck me.
"Come to think of it, didn't you say your leave ends today?"
"Yeah, I have to report back to base tomorrow. I only got such a long leave this time because of the unusual circumstances. Normally, we only get one day off a week."
"...I see. So I'll be on my own for the next week starting tomorrow..."
I had already known this, of course, but having it spelled out like this left a bitter taste in my mouth. Yoon Siwoo's absence meant I wouldn't be able to let my guard down at home the way I had today. As I muttered to myself with my head bowed, Yoon Siwoo let out a sheepish chuckle and asked, half-jokingly:
"Ahaha... What's with that reaction? Are you sad to see me go?"
"...If I said I wasn't, I'd be lying."
"Huh? R-really? I was only joking..."
Yoon Siwoo stole a few startled glances at me, his eyes wide. ...What? Why are you looking at me like that? Did you want me to say I'm thrilled to have your house all to myself? A brief silence settled over the table before Yoon Siwoo spoke again, his expression turning earnest.
"...Hey, Scarlet. You really are worried about something, aren't you?"
"..."
When I remained silent, unable to find an easy answer, Yoon Siwoo spoke up once more.
"You know, you once told me that you'd do anything for me, and that I shouldn't hold back... It's a little embarrassing to say this out loud, but I feel the same way. I'll do anything within my power for you. If there's ever a way I can help, please don't hesitate to ask."
He offered me a warm smile.
"We're friends, aren't we?"
His words made my chest tighten, stealing the breath from my lungs. The word friend, coming from Yoon Siwoo's lips, carried a weight that was almost too heavy to bear.
My father had once told me that true friends never calculate gains and losses. Perhaps that was why he had poured his entire soul into helping his friend when they fell on hard times. And in return, he was betrayed by the very man he trusted. Yet, even at the very end, my father never uttered a single word of resentment. Perhaps it was because, to his dying breath, he still considered that man his friend.
I understood my father's heart completely. But what about the other side of the coin? What if the man who betrayed my father had also considered him a friend, and had simply turned to him out of sheer, desperate necessity when he had nowhere else to go? I refused to ever become that kind of friend.
I knew deep down that I, too, yearned for a bond that transcended mutual benefit. But both in my past life and in this one, I had always been the one on the receiving end of help. Even when I didn't want it, those who grew close to me would look at my circumstances and feel compelled to offer their aid. That was why I fought so hard to avoid accepting help unless it was absolutely unavoidable. And when I did have to accept it, I did everything in my power to repay the debt in full. I refused to take their kindness for granted just because we were "friends." I couldn't bear the thought of someone suffering my father's fate because they had reached out a hand to save me.
And so, I suppressed it. I locked away my true desire—the desperate urge to cling to him, to beg him not to leave my side so that I could finally feel safe. Forcing down the rising emotion, I offered Yoon Siwoo a smile.
"Yeah, thank you. But really, I'm fine."
I was still holding together. I could endure this. But as for how much longer I could keep up the facade, I hadn't the faintest clue.
"I'm heading out. Keep an eye on the place for me while I'm gone this week."
"Yeah, leave it to me. Oh, and I'll fold your laundry and leave it on your bed."
"Ugh... W-wait, I can handle my own laundry..."
"It's fine, it's barely any work anyway. Have a good day!"
Early the next morning, after a quick breakfast together, I saw Yoon Siwoo off and began my walk to school. I was already starting to dread the reaction awaiting me. May had texted me telling me not to worry, but let's be real—the second I stepped into that classroom, every single eye was going to be glued to me.
Even though I’d been cleared of all charges, in the eyes of my peers, I was basically a kid who had just returned from a high-profile court trial. There was no way they wouldn't stare. It wasn't like I could just gather everyone around and say, “Hey guys, let me tell you the wild story of how I got kidnapped by a Witch, rescued, and then dragged into an interrogation room on suspicion of treason!” like it was some casual gossip.
Lost in my anxious thoughts, I found myself standing in front of the Academy before I knew it. I swallowed hard, my throat tight with tension as I stood before the classroom door. Ah, whatever. Screw it. Steeling my resolve, I flung the door wide open. Instantly, every single gaze in the room locked onto me. I squeezed my eyes shut at the chilling sight, bracing myself for the inevitable barrage of questions. But instead...
"Morning, Scarlet."
"Good morning."
To my utter bewilderment, the voices that greeted me were perfectly ordinary. I offered a dazed response as I slid into my seat, and the heavy weight of their stares gradually began to lift. Just as I was starting to breathe a sigh of relief at their surprisingly normal behavior, I noticed something incredibly bizarre.
"...Hey, did you watch that broadcast yesterday?"
"...Huh? Oh, uh, yeah. That one, right? Yeah, I saw it."
The kids who were supposedly chatting were completely failing to focus on their own conversations. I watched them closely, trying to figure out what was off, until the truth finally clicked. Wait... are they actively trying as hard as they can NOT to look at me? Puzzled by their bizarre behavior, I tilted my head, then stood up and walked over to May.
"Hey, May? What's going on here?"
"...Seriously, they are all absolutely terrible actors," May muttered, letting out a heavy sigh. "...Look, you went through a massive ordeal. We figured you must be completely exhausted mentally, so last week we all agreed that when you came back, we'd act completely normal so we wouldn't trigger any bad memories. But they're being so incredibly obvious about it. Honestly, we shouldn't have bothered if they were going to fail this hard."
I stared at her, genuinely taken aback. "...Wait, nobody cares? About me being interrogated, I mean."
"Why would we? Did you honestly think we'd shun you just because of some stupid investigation?"
...To be honest, I had braced myself for exactly that kind of reaction, so I gave a small nod. May let out a scoff of disbelief and gestured toward the rest of the classroom.
"Scarlet, every single one of us—including me—would probably be dead at the hands of the Witch if it weren't for you. We all owe you our lives. You sacrificed yourself to save us, so how could any of us turn our backs on you over some baseless suspicion? And besides..."
May paused, her eyes narrowing into a terrifying glare as she scanned the room.
"If any bastard in this room actually tries to pull something like that, I'll personally tear them apart. So don't worry."
"...R-right. Got it."
I shrank back instinctively under the sheer force of her aura. Still, I couldn't help but feel a warm swell of emotion. To think they had all coordinated this just to spare my feelings... As I looked around the room with touched eyes, the other students—who had clearly been eavesdropping on my conversation with May—quickly looked away, their faces flushing with embarrassment. ...Seriously, every single one of them is far too sweet.
"Ah! S-Scarlet! Good morning!"
Just as I was basking in the warmth of their kindness, Jesse, who had apparently just arrived, spotted me and practically jumped out of her skin as she squeaked out a greeting. She was visibly trembling with tension. ...Is she acting like this because of the "act normal" pact?
When I stared at her, Jesse quickly averted her eyes, her voice shaking as she stammered, "W-why are you looking at me like that? It's a g-great morning, right?! Absolutely nothing out of the ordinary here!"
"...Jesse, you can stop. The gig is up. We already figured it out," May interjected, unable to watch the trainwreck of a performance any longer.
"Ah! Really?!"
Relief washed over Jesse at May's words, and her stiff shoulders slumped as she let out a long breath. She stared at me for a brief second, and then, with tears suddenly spilling over her eyelids, she lunged forward and buried her face in my chest, sobbing uncontrollably.
"Uwahhh, sniff... I was so, so worried when I heard what happened! You're really okay now, right? They didn't do anything to you, right?"
"...I'm fine, Jesse. I'm really okay, so shh, stop crying."
"*Sniff*... I'm so glad you're safe... I was so scared that you were going to end up like my brother..."
I must have truly terrified her; Jesse's tears showed no signs of stopping. I spent several minutes gently stroking her hair and murmuring comforting words until her sobs finally subsided. Jesse peeked up from my chest, her tear-stained face breaking into a bright, innocent smile.
"Ehehe... You really are too kind, Scarlet. You're such a dummy. There's no way someone as sweet as you could ever be associated with something as evil as a Witch."
Her eyes were completely clear, devoid of even a single speck of doubt as she stared straight into mine. With that same bright, innocent smile, she whispered:
"Because if you were... I would have had to kill you with my own hands. But that's impossible, right? Ehehe."
And so, I couldn't nod.